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  1. And it's not the first time. He was never once faithful to her. That's how me and my sister have grown up. Watching a broken family act as though we are alright and happy. My mum says she's fine with it as long as we are grown up and keeps reassuring that it doesn't affect her now, but I can tell it does. She just doesn't want to bring in the matter of divorce due to various reasons. But I'm tired of pretending. I feel like this is going to be my whole life. A home that has no real emotions to express. We can't even say it to him that we know since he becomes more careful and just hides it better. I feel like I'm carrying this huge burden on my shoulders. I can't even tell any of my friends, cause guess what? I haven't made any friendships close or strong or long enough to share such thoughts. I don't have friends who would care if I did share. They'd probably just throw some pity and move on. I have an exam in two days. And I can't even focus that well. I must be crazy, right?
  2. first of all thank you for your time and, my english may not be that good but im gonna try my best im a 15 year old girl and i have a 4 years older sister (19) who literally starts punching me on the face and pulling my hair whenever i ask her to, for example; move away when im sweeping the floor or when i ask her to clean the mess she made with food on MY bed... like im not even asking her to do me a favor she just refuses to act like a decent human being, she takes "dont tell me what to do" to a whoooooole new level.. she gets so easily offended by literally nothing and thats her biggest insecurity i once called her a snowflake and she almost broke my nose lmao i regret nothing. and because of what. because she pushed me away when i was sitting next to her holding the laptop, reading the news about the BTS meal, and i asked her to search for the price and she got offended thats why i called her a snowflake and she was TRIGGERED 🙂 when it comes to decent respect to family members or people in general, shes a complete a*hole. shes not participating in the chores (i always have to do her part of the chores) plus she always act like we owe her something; using my things without permission and throwing it on the floor when i want it back... and much more. our little sister is 12 and she never interacts with her cuz she knows how of a psychopath she is, and our older sister sometimes try to pick on her as usual but i often stand up for her because im the one who knows her weaknesses and i just cant let her win. this s**t didnt happen overnight, she used to abuse me physically and emotionally when we were kids and i learned how to use it all against her, shes just projecting her insecurities on others and i make sure shes always reminded of how weak she is to act like that.. sounds manipulative i know, shes one of the mostly people on earth that i have 0 empathy left for her, i would say that is my coping mechanism, i always win at argument, so her only comeback is the hitting and thats the only thing she wins at, but that doesnt affect me as much as it affects her, i dont really feel anything when she hits me it just gets old.. no f*cks left to give thats it, and i know how much words trigger her so i would never keep my mouth shut bcz i can 🙂 neither of us is mentally stable at this point, but i try as much as i can not to let people go through what ive gone through, something she does the complete opposite of, and i love making the people of her kind have a taste of their own medicine the most important part, are my parents paying attention to this? yes and no. i feel like theyre doubting themselves for her being like this, because... no need to sugar-coat this, child abuse is so normalized in our culture and my older sister was so mentally affected by which made her ego so fragile... are they doing anything to help? hear me out, when my sister and i get into a fight im "the only one who they can communicate with, safely" and i just need to ignore her because "im more mature"... like she always throws a tantrum like a f*cking 2 year old, crying and screaming whenever they try to discipline her saying that "they are the reason why she is like this" no b*tch stfu youre just a snowflake and you trying to make us feel bad while youre the one who always starts it off and tries to get away with it like a weak ass bi*ch like how can any parents expect and consider the victim who is also the youngest, to be more mature? how does that make you feel about yourself as a f*cking 19 year old? it bother me most when i see them not incharge of all of this, it makes me think: "when is she going to cmmit dead and leave us all in peace?" i even get death threats from her and i get bruises on my body and my scalp is hurting af its literally a miracle that she didnt break any bone in my body yet and MY PARENTS ARE NOT HELPING I SWEAR SOMEDAY IM GOING TO CALL THE POLICE
  3. I have the most wonderful boyfriend in the world - the two of us have so much in common and are uncannilly linked in so many ways - however, we have this one nagging problem... When I first met him he told me about how he used to watch porn all the time which I figured was something all guys do from everything I've ever read on the subject. Not soon after we met and started being boyfriend/girlfriend did I notice something odd happening. First of all he lives in Canada, and I in the US, so when we aren't together we have "sex" on the webcam. Basically we masturbate for each other and it is a lot of fun and makes me feel better as I'm sure it does him. However, after we had been together for a few months, the frequency of these video escapades started to drop off. In the beginning it was every night or every other night, then it was more like every two-four nights. Now, from what he's told me time and again about the frequency of his desires, he needs to *take care of business* in some form or another every other day at least. If he's not doing this with me the only thing I can think is he's pleasuring himself to porn like the old days. He gets very upset and very defensive when I bring this up saying he never does that, that he saves himself for me. He basically turns the tables and starts blaming me for being untrusting. He says he doesn't do stuff by himself because he wouldn't want to "ruin things with us" by doing things on his own and then not being able to with me. I think this would be a very nice gesture, if it were really true. He also claims to have low testosterone levels even though he's never had them checked, and thinks he has some sort of erectile dysfunction stemming from stress or whatnot. He is perfectly healthy, and how much stress could someone like him have? He basically has no responsibilities, financial or otherwise! Please help me, I don't know what to do here. He will never admit looking at porn even if he did it all day long - I know this because I know how he is. I can't stand the fact that he may be lying to me. We want to get married someday in the not too distant future and I don't want a lying or maybe even *god forbid* cheating boyfriend grrrr. The guy I was with before him cheated on me numerous times with cyber sex relationships. If anyone has any advice or experience I'm all ears. - Frustrated in New York
  4. Hello all, I'm trying to balance my mental health a little as I think my break up definitely wobbled it a little. I found out my ex was on a dating website, which now I have accepted as she is totally free to do as she wishes. I decided it may be good for me to do so to. I went on the same one as her, not to spy before anyone says! It just seemed it would be the best one for me in terms of opportunities and the fact it's free! It would appear she has hidden her profile as she didn't appear on the search for my town-a blessing in disguise as we won't stumble across each other - but when I clicked the "who viewed me" tab, it showed she had looked at my profile-this would have been few weeks back though as I did log on when I recieved an email telling me I had a message- It showed her as online but I have heard that sometimes these sites aren't fully accurate with the online status. I am assuming she has hidden her profile as at this stage, with lockdown, she may have seen it as a waste of time and will unhide it when things return to normal, this kind of gives me a little relief as deep down I would love to sort things with her. Alternatively she may be hidden and is now chatting to the people that messaged her before she made her profile hidden. Either way, I don't know how best to focus my mind as I think either thought process will cause me unwanted stress or anxiety
  5. Me & my significant other are currently going through some things that are veryyy complicated! .. to make it sort of simple.. We were having disagreements & arguments like no other for the past 2 weeks straight.. the arguments stems from him turning down my advances for sex .. again! at first it was the "I'm tired from work" "I'm to stressed out" to a blatent "I just don't want to" & him not wanting to do any bonding activities (it's fair season) so.. I can admit I have been giving him a hard time because I was frustrated. Things ended up getting physical. & I broke his windshield :( It was my fault , offered to pay for damages but he says "we're okay , I forgive you" sounds like good news right? (Under the circumstances) nope! so he then decided basically that since the relationship went left we can be friends until things get back right.. but the Break is not mutual.. & his reasoning for not wanting the relationship seems like things we can work on from within & he just doesn't agree.. I'm at a crossroads sort of because I love him so much but I feel as if he's trying to leave the door cracked open ya know? Or like you know how you can bond with a car but without the title it's pointless? That's how I feel.. I may be processing it wrong but what do you guys think ?
  6. i really have everything in life. i have really nice parents, two brothers who love me, the best and funniest friends in the world, i draw quite well for someone my age (15), and (used to) have good grades, but due to anxiety issues my grades dropped a little, from A to B- or C. I don't know why my mental health is so debilitated, i don't have any major trauma or anything like that. I started being anxious/depressed one year an a half ago, maybe because of stress from school, but there aren't many people who have the same problems as me at my class. I take lots of medicine, but those don't seem to work as well as i wanted to, it just prevents me from suiciding instantly, wich i've tried two times. i really wanted to take this out of my chest, thanks if you read it till here.
  7. Hi everyone, I’m not sure what kind for advice I’m looking for this time, I probably just need to vent. I’ve been down on my luck lately, I just feel as if nothing goes my way, I’ve been having issues with my bank, they keep blocking my debit card for no apparent reason (they apologize and then block my card again). My neighbor has been harassing me because he believes there’s a leak coming from my apartment even though two plumbers have confirmed there’s no leak. I am super busy at work too, I’m really stressed, feel like I might be sick soon, I wake up in the middle of the night thinking about these things. I also lost some weight, like rationally I know none of the above is super serious, it just seems my body is tired of this stress. My friends have been supportive, I just don’t want to complain too much as I am usually the one who cheers everyone up. Right now I feel like I need some support. I live in another country, my family is back home, I don’t tell the much about my life, I don’t want to complain, even if I do, their response is something like I’m grown up now and need to take care of my life. This totally makes sense, I just wish they’d be more supportive in a way. They believe I should be grateful I managed to move to Western Europe and don’t complain, but I just can’t be happy all the time. I’m tired of over-faking I’m alright and my life is perfect. My best friend is coming to visit this weekend and to be honest, I’m not even excited about her visiting, I don’t feel like doing sightseeing with her, I just want to sleep. I know I’ll overcome this when she’s here but is stresses me out too. I don’t want to sound spoiled, I know life is never perfect, I just feel right now I have little energy and patience left. As I said, I don’t know what kind of advice I’m expecting, thanks for reading this.
  8. I'm going to try and keep this short and to the point. My fiance and I have been together for 3 years. He recently took a job out of town which we thought would be a great opportunity since we've struggling financially. He's been gone barely 2 months. He's living with some friends of an old coworker. The problem is we barely talk. Like we chit chat on messenger throughout the day. But when he calls we talk for like 5 minutes and that's about it. He always messages and says he's off work, he's gonna go home and charge his phone and call me in a few. Well that turns into like 2 or 3 hours. He always call pretty much right before he goes to bed. Or always has some other excuse. Last week we were on the phone and he said his roommates had company over and he didn't want to be rude... Like I kind of get it. It sucks when you have to walk outside to have a conversation. But I'm his fiance. When I was away helping my parents with a bunch of stuff last year. I had to walk outside to talk to him and I didn't care if it was raining or cold or to hot. I took the time to have a conversation with him. Am I overreacting or over thinking? I've been trying to have a conversation with him about how this all makes me feel. But it's like pulling teeth to even stay on the phone with him. He's always got something going on with them or he's to tired and is going to bed. Plus I'm trying to not to add to the stress that we are already going through. since this job isn't working out the way we thought it would and we're broker than we've ever been. And I'm having surgery this friday and he won't even be here and I don't think he even tried to find out if he could come home for that... Sorry for the long post. I've got a lot of pent up stress and emotions.
  9. Hey all - to cut a long story short: seen this guy a few times, felt pretty intense pretty quick. Good connection etc. We are about 1.5 hours from each other so not the easiest to see one another and he is in a full time job. He said he’s very eager to see me and this week coming up would be good - however on friday he got a job interview offer (he’s currently switching jobs which is a great source of stress to him) but doesnt know when yet so couldnt commit to seeing me. Totally get it. So we talk every day. And today I said that I guessed he hadn’t heard back yet as to when his interview is, so would the week after work better for him? He left me on read lol. Great. Did I do anything wrong? He has left me on read before and then messaged back later so this isn’t totally out of the ordinary
  10. We were dating for a year, and I thought everything was going really well. I was doing my best to be open and communicative etc And believed he was being truthful and communicative with me. When I brought up the prospect of moving in together in the future and things got weird right after. I was broken up with, and told that I was more stress than I was worth, that he actually hadn't loved me for a while, that I have a different view of what a relationship is because I want to hang out more than he does and that it was really hard to love me because I was open about struggling with anxiety issues from time to time. Two days later he came back to me saying that he made a mistake and truly loved me and wanted to work on things. He assured me he just panicked and didn't mean any of what he said and that he thought that is just what you say during breakups. I took him back, and over the next two weeks he was extremely loving/overly nice telling me he loved me a ton, reassuring me this was true when we were intimate as I was super nervous to be intimate again after being broken up with the first time. He slept over one last time and we slept together in the morning, he told me he loved me multiple times when I dropped him off at home. The next night we were talking on the phone and I said, "just checking in, how are you feeling about things right now is there anything I can do to improve?" And he sprung it on me "Actually I need to break up with you". He came over, (it was about midnight at this time and he knew that I had 2 big shows to play the next day) and told me he mistook guilt for love and that he didn't love me at all, that I have large character flaws he can not deal with such as me not being confident enough on stage (I am a musician and get stage fright, but I still play a ton of shows and no one other than those closes to me would know I struggle with this) told me that he wished I played in more bands like I used to (I recently quit a few projects to focus on one I'm really passionate about, and had quit a band because I had been assaulted by a member in it and my partner continued playing shows with this person after despite me saying it hurt me) and told me he wishes I was more outgoing (I struggle with anxiety but I still find I am a very personable and outgoing person). He also told me he doesn't want to support me while going I go to counseling as it is more stress than its worth. He then accused me of begging and pleading him to be in a relationship with me ( I did not feel I was doing this as I was just trying to share my side of feelings and understand how a switch could flip overnight). I have truly never felt so disoriented to have someone change and act emotionless out of the blue. I understand that it is okay to breakup, I just felt absolutely crushed as he had never communicated any issues to me and I felt that my character was ripped apart and that the breakup was my fault when I genuinely would have been so open to communication and willing to work on any issues. Its been just over a month since everything happened and I have found it incredibly hard to move on. He refused to talk to me for 2 weeks right after he ended things and told me if I really wanted to talk we could meet in exactly two weeks. Despite me asking for sooner, I had to wait for 2 weeks (I can understand boundaries, I just felt like it was a way to control my response as I was really upset and he wasn’t taking any accountability =( ). I had asked for him to meet me in the middle at under two weeks so I could move forward, but got no response. When we met, I found myself apologizing for being emotional and hurt, and he stated that "good, you should be sorry” and that “He said some , but wouldn't have had to say any of it if I hadn't pressured him for reasons and he needed to say those things in order for me to know his decision was final" After all of this, I have been feeling really low on myself. I feel embarrassed that I reacted so emotionally and sent him texts going back and forth between being sorry, angry, and missing him. I also feel embarrassed that I ended up being the one to apologize/feel like I did something wrong when he was the one who dumped me suddenly and had essentially lied to me for months while continuing to have sex with me and tell me he loved me. How can I begin to move forward? I feel really lost and hurt. I feel I am longing for him to acknowledge that how he treated me at the end was incredibly hurtful instead of the "Breakups always suck, it would have been out of the blue no matter what, you are over reacting and not being pragmatic" responses that I have received
  11. I recently met a guy and the first night we actually met up in person, we'd talked on the phone alot before hand.. the first time we hooked up we were so into each other that we ended up sleeping together. We talked about it before and after it happened but now I 'm a lillte worried that he won't ever be able to be serious about me. He assured me he'd done it the other way too many times and lost the girl anyhow. He was kind and caring afterwards and asked to see me again. Do you think he could really be into me or are all guys the same and just want sex? He genuinely seems keen, maybe its too early to tell.? I do tend to read too much into things...any suggestions on how to not stress and just ride with it..
  12. I am really stressed the past few days. (by the way I get stressed easily) I am a high school freshman. I will become a sophomore next year. I feel that I am not taking enough AP courses ( advanced placement). I think only in United States they call that AP. Anyway, can anyone give me some suggestions? By the way anyone know any good summer programs?Preferably in Massachusetts. I want to improve my math so I will feel confident to take AP math in my junior year. Thank you in advance.
  13. okay... for those of you that have read my previous post, you know whats going on... a few days ago, she said she's falling in love with me... i dont know whether to believe her or not, i trust her, but idk now... i love her, alot... but im just confused on what she wants... first she's to busy, then we get together for the night we spent together, then she's to busy, then she's falling in love with me... and guess what, now she's too busy... and the way she talks to me, idk if its because of stress, or what... but t seems like she's just pissed off at the world... the tone she uses at least... please help, i dont want to mess up again, she could be the one, but i think she's afraid to find out or something... i am sorry i am not very good with words, but yeah... its... bringing me to my knees, i just dont know what to do or say to her anymore. and we havent seen or talked to eachother much lately... is there a mixed signal de-coder ring? please help, if she's the one for me, i cant let her slip through my fingers like my other family members have done in previous relationships... help.
  14. I have a job which is full of stress, and have been struggling with the torrible pain in my back -for 3 months now- which hurts whenever I sit. The problem is this does not stop, I have gone to a series of doctors, all of which said a different thing, some said do not do any sports and some gave me some small exercise. So I began to do exercises, but whenever I get down, the terrible pain begins, than I began to get more depressed, and then comes the vicious circle!! I have realized that my mental situation affects my body immediately but I don't know how to get out of this circle? Any advice on how to reduce stress? or how to cure this pain is welcome, and let me add that I am not that kind of a person who enjoys going to a club, a sports activity or stg. like that, in other words I really don't know very well to make myself feel relaxed..I only like to have a walk on my own, but I am not sure whether it is good for my back? or makes it worse? Please help, I am starting to think that I am like those old old people who alwys speak of their pain!!
  15. My ex boyfriend's birthday is coming up at the end of next week and I really need your help! We broke up about 4.5 months ago and since then have had little contact, I think mainly because we couldn't move to friendship which was never firmly established. Also, I'm not sure if we are both over it enough to just move on. His birthday is next friday, and i am planning to send him a friendly card. I know this doesn;t seem like a big deal, but I just want to mess things up by doing this. My plan is to send a card with no mushy words, and without any indications that I think we should rethink our breakup. this is not my reason to sendit to him at all. I just want it to be a nice birthday touch. Am I mistaken in thinking that this is ok to do? Will he take it the wrong way. If you can, please help me think this over!! Thank you so much for taking the time to post. I kno I shouldn't stress over this so much, but I think that if a couple of you will answer, it will help me put the stress away. One last thing to keep in mind is that I have never sent him birthday card before, so this will be the first one I will ever give to him. Does this change a lot? Thanx
  16. My girlfriend and I have been together for a year and we live together. She is 21 and I am 19. She has been diagnosed with a thyroid problem so she has a low sex drive and a very low energy level. I am very sympathetic to this and I try to take care of her the best I can. I am almost always stressed over money. She doesn't work and easily could, even a part time job would make a big difference. Whenever I bring up the idea of her getting a job, she immediately goes off like a rocket and won't even talk to me about it. She hardly ever wants sex and this is very hard for me at my age, especially being as stressed as I am. I am very very attracted to her and always have been, but I am starting to feel like she is not attracted to me at all. She doesn't even want to kiss me sometimes. I love her more than anything in the world. She is really all I have. Last night she caught me masturbating to some internet porn. She got very very angry with me and now she is saying she wants to leave me or stay with me but have sex with someone else on the side... she says it is up to me. I know what I did was wrong and I did not want to hurt her feelings. I wasn't thinking clearly at the time. Things haven't always been this way. I want it to be like it was before. What should I do?
  17. ok bottom line school is starting tomorro, unneeded stress im afraid ill go back into cutting what should i do -stitches aka The Antihero
  18. SO i've called and begged, pleaded, whined, threatened (not in a scarey way). I've met up with him a few times (a month later) and lost weight got brown and managed not to get blasted and tearfull and made him laugh. I've even had sex with someone else. Still he is in my thoughts every waking hour of every day and I want him back so bad it makes me feel physically sick. We'd been rowing a bit before we broke up- I,ve got a new job and was stressed. So he calls me up and says he needs to concentrate on his career and be selfish for a while which makes me wanna wring his neck as I really needed his support. Help.
  19. Okay I'm just gonna kind of ramble here, so I apologize if this turns into something really long! Over the holidays I got engaged. Some of you know my situation: Long distance relationship and all that. It's been really amazing and we are EXTREMELY excited! But I don't know... for some reason in my mind I thought that this was going to be easy. There's so much! I've been engaged for two weeks, and already we've started planning, even though the wedding isn't for... what? 18 and a half months? We already have so much done! It's crazy! I'm not stressed about the wedding, really. I think my stress lies in the fact that I'm using it as an escape. Focusing on the planning is what is keeping my mind busy. It's keeping me from thinking about the fact that, once again, we're separated by thousands of miles. I haven't dealt with it like I should. He cried twice the day he left! And he isn't an overly emotional guy! I haven't cried at all. While I'm not STRESSED about the actual planning, there's also a lot to be done, and so much of it has to get put on the back burner until I get a new job so I have money! We have a lot of details nailed down, but there's a lot of work still to be done. Which is fine because we have so much time, I know. I guess I'm kind of freaked out that, even though we have 18 months, we have so much to do that we need to start doing things NOW. That, in itself, is overwhelming. The good thing is that we went in a totally different direction with the ceremony than I thought we would. All my life I've envisioned the classic wedding: big hall, huge dress, and everyone in the world that we know attending. And of course it would cost an arm and a leg. That would have taken a lot of planning and there would have been a ton of tiny details to figure out. But now we're going with a very small ceremony- a themed wedding, actually. And the venue is sort of all-inclusive, in a way. And while I know that should take a load off as far as details go, in a way it makes it more difficult. I've spent my whole life deciding how I would handle those little details, and now they aren't there. Having that "unknown" adds stress more than it relieves it. I won't have the familiar around. The wedding is in his city, 2,800 miles from where I live. It's at an annual Renaissance Festival that he has attended many times but I have never been to. We are making the outfits for almost the entire wedding party, including my fiance and his three attendants, all of whom live there in Pittsburgh, making it hard to get a proper fit for their clothes..... I love this idea for our wedding, don't get me wrong! It's very unique and it will be incredibly memorable. I just have no clue how to handle a wedding! LOL! I truly believe that all of this just comes with the territory of being a bride-to-be. I just have no idea how to handle it all in stride. I guess I just need encouragement... Advice... ANYTHING anyone can offer to help me survive! ..... okay... I'm done venting now.
  20. Okay, the guy I've been with for the past month, is going through a lot of stress right now. He is always stressed out, and the problem is that I don't really know what I can do. I try to be as nice as possible and offer him encouragement and support, but sometimes I just don't know if it is enough. I get so frustrated, sometimes he complains a lot about being stressed but doesn't really talk a whole lot about whats bothering him. One time, I asked him straight out what I can do, and he said , well there isn't a whole lot, u are way on the other side of the city and i am way too tired to drive over there and see you. Part of me wants to forget about this stuff. I know its so bad, but I wanna just get on with my life, and continue working on everything i been working on. And just let him come around when he wants to, you know? But then again, he was with me through some very hard times and he stuck it out for me - its really hard. I just don't know what I can do for him... and I just wanna see him happy and relaxed.
  21. Here's the story ... I met my ex in a grad class. Even though I initially approached him, I was totally uncertain about him, since I had been hurt before, and didn't want to deal with it again; however, the more he talked to me, the more I wanted to talk to him. He created such a comfortable environment that I totally fell for him. After 2 months of spending 4 - 5 nights a week with him, I really feel like he is the one for me. We are so similar, yet so different, that I feel like he is the perfect match for me. Since we were both finishing up grad school, during the time of our relationship, we both came under a lot of stress. Also, I was really insecure of myself sometimes, since, as I mentioned, I have been hurt before. thereforeeee, sometimes, we would agrue over small things. However, we would make up, and that would be the end of it. I wouldn't think twice about the agruments. One Friday night, we spent the night together, and everything was fine. Then, Sunday night, he calls me to tell me that he thinks we are too different to live with each other forever, and he think we should end this now before it goes too far and we are both hurt too much. Right now, he is in a different state for work-related training for 12 weeks (gone 4 weeks now). Last week, I told him that I wouldn't call him, and he could call me whenever he felt he needed to talk to me or missed me, and left it at that. Haven't heard from him in 9 days. He is from India, and that he has never had a girlfriend (he is 24 and i am 23) -- I am Indian American. I think his perception of "love" is all roses and wine ... and when arguments came up, he thought them as "irrepairable differences". I know I am doing the right thing by establishing a NC rule for myself, but just wanted some positive stories and support out there. Can a man be uncertain about things and then revert back? In the meantime, everyone enjoy their weekends ... I'll be trying my hardest to enjoy mine! Thanks for "listening" (reading)! Blue
  22. Alright, Wed. night I went out w/ a girl that is quite a bit younger than me (always the case. me - 31, her - 19) She has a b/f who she is moving out of state with on this tuesday. I thought we would just have a couple drinks and hang and talk. Stuff happened. It was marathon run. About 5 hours of some of the best sex ever. Afterwards we slept and cuddled. She kept saying how glad she was that we went out, how much fun she had, and how she was happy things happened between us. When I dropped her off, she kissed me goodbye. Like a real kiss. Now let me stress this fact....I was NOT expecting any kind of relationship to come out of this, and I definitley don't want one with her for numerous and obvious reasons.....I just wanted to get that clear. She said she wanted to hang again before she left town and that I should call her. The following day was her last day at work. I was off that day, and slept about 14 hours, not calling her or seeing her. On friday, I had to call her for work-related reasons, abd she told me to call her when I got off. I called her at midnight, and there was no answer on her house phone. She did not return my call today. Now here is when I am going to sound like a typical guy....I must say that I enjoyed her company, even if we didn't have sex, but I really want to hook it up at least one more time! Now as I said, she never returned my call today, so i didn't call her. Im thinking about calling her tomorrow night and trying to make plans, but I don't want to look like im desperate or all into her or anything creepy. Its just that the clocking is ticing and she will be leaving soon, and as I said, I want to have another one of those nights! Im also kind of shocked that she hasn't called on her own, or returned my call. What do you think, would it be weird if I called her again tomorrow or should I just let it go. Again, I want to stress, there is no emotional level at all outside that I thought she would make a cool buddy.
  23. I ahve a friend in the freshman class I emt at the beginning of the year named Kayliegh. She's a sweet girl, moved in from Pennsylvania, and had recently broken up with a friend of mine (they were dating a few weeks before school started.) For a while, I was her shoulder to cry on, and mainly someone to protect her. For a while, she seemed appreciative. After homecomign week, she started to break away from my aide, which was fine. She etched a certain phrase into my mind, however... "You're like a big brother to me. I don't care how this was meant, I took it to heart. It meant alot to me. Recently, I tried striking up a conversation with her after not speakign together for a lengthy period of time. She was very open with me online, as always, but when I saw her at school that Monday and tried tos trike up a conversation, I felt...disregarded. To the younger ladies out there, assist me please. What do you think makes her attitude toward me in person different?
  24. Ok guys, this frum has been a major help before ad hopefully it still is... I've been with this guy for about 8 months, mainly long distance, but with some periods of 1-2 months living together. We've had great time sexually, as friends, travelling, talking, getting to know each others lives and friends etc. For stress at work from his side and some other problems from my side our sex life has been almost inexistent recently - last time we spent together for 10 days we just couldn't find the time or the mood to have sex at all. There is still tenderness and I honestly think we love each other a lot. But this stress and lack of sex and living long distance is just getting to us, and the longer we struggle in this vicious circle, the more it's affecting us. I want to move to his place, he might have wanted that too, but recently he has started to hesitate and prefers me moving closer (I want to move) but in a different flat just in case. I feel like s**t. I don't want to lose him or give up, but is there any chance of us finding each ther again and forgetting about the "bad times"? Nw we're breaking up and it HURTS!!! Please help. Princesa
  25. Well, I'm not sure if anyone out there has any advice on this but here goes. My girlfriend is not out, and this has caused a lot of stress on our relationship. The other day she said that she doesn't know if she will ever be able to come out, and she feels she is waisting my time and hers by continuing the relationship. I told her that I love her and I will wait for her to come out, but she says that the stress is just too much. Her family is from another country and very Catholic, and I do know that they would disown her if she did come out. However, she has not even told her friends about us, and we have been together for over two years. Most of her friends live out of town so she really only hangs out with me and my friends (who do know about us). I'm very devistated right now, and I'm trying to understand where she is coming from. She is in her early 30's, and I think her biological clock is ticking. I've asked her to seek counseling, but she refuses saying she knows what she needs to do but just is not sure she can ever do it. As of now we are "separated" and I'm so confused. I love her so much, but I don't know what to do for her. I'm just giving her space, and I'm trying to not bring up anything. Does anyone have any advice on what I should do? Or are there any online groups that help people who are not out?
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