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eyeswideopen

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Everything posted by eyeswideopen

  1. eyeswideopen
    If your boyfriend truly loves you, he will not care where you come from, will see who you are, and where you seem to be going. You were able to take all that negative and turn it into a positive. I can't stress enough how much strength that takes, character it proves, and willpower you possess. Most people in similar situations keep the cycle going and do nothing about it. You have. If I loved someone who possessed those characteristics, I would want to do everything I could to be with them forever.
  2. eyeswideopen
    Believe I'm not expert, however if I was in the situation and really wanted it to work out this is what I would do... First, buy her flowers, leave a heartfelt handwritten note on it explaining how you truly feel for her, and how much you regret not giving her the attention and love she deserved. Second.. think back to when you first fell in love.. what was it about her that made you fall for her.. what was it about you that made her fall for you? either try and recreate that moment of time or buy her something that reminds her of that time.. Do you have any momento's or keepsakes from the beginning when it was just you two? something that she may not know you even saved.. wrap it up and give it to her.. keep it somewhat subtle and not so "in her face". you could even go simpler here. leave little things for her before you leave so when she comes home she sees them but again, don't bombard her. give her the physical space she needs.. whatever you do, do not use the children as messengers no matter what.
  3. eyeswideopen
    I'd be honest about it. I can understand exactly where you are coming from here but if he truly loves you, and sees what you were able to achieve based on where you come from, I see no reason why he would react negatively. I personally respect people like us a bit more because of the obstacles we've had to overcome to get to where we are opposed to someone like your boyfriend who (not to take away from his accomplishments) is maintaining the status quo of his upbringing. You chose to better yourself and that drive/passion is a powerful trait to have.
  4. eyeswideopen
    You cheated, plain and simple. Don't tell him though.
  5. eyeswideopen
    She is with another guy who just got out of jail. Has a daughter with him. She's extremely attracted to drama. It's a shame really cause she's a really great person. On the bright side, she's a lawyer, is raising two children, and taking care of things. Being a good friend of hers, I just feel she deserves something better and more stable, although this may be exactly what she needs. I'm still her friend regardless. I'm actually her first son's godfather.
  6. eyeswideopen
    Here's a bright side that is kinda cold so I apologize if it comes accross that way.. You are now free from the burden of having a filandering, cheating, lying, deadbeat guy and do no have to try and explain this to a child who you would be raising by yourself. It's a difficult time as I helped a friend through this same process when I was in high school and it wasn't easy for her. But she got through it with time and healed. However, she made the same mistake twice, only this time she married the guy, got divorced after a child, and with another guy who's also similar. Do yourself a favor and choose a guy who doesn't fit this other guy's profile. Remember, physical attraction is great, but isn't everything. Look at the whole package.
  7. eyeswideopen
    Relate it to the movie Clueless. Serisously.. just go with your heart.. see where it takes you. Leave everyone else out of it until you know what you want.
  8. eyeswideopen
    If you love him, research it. If you don't, why bother moving forward? It is a risk.
  9. eyeswideopen
    I don't think this would be that big a deal amigo. If you both have feelings for each other go for it. It sounds like you guys would know each other pretty well which is always a good start. I wouldn't sneak around once you determined there's something really there.
  10. eyeswideopen
    I love it when a girl approaches me in a conversation. It shows confidence, boldness, and independence.. all qualities I love.
  11. eyeswideopen
    Well said.
  12. eyeswideopen
    I decided to go on Prozac about a month ago without seeing a therapist and to be honest, it's not really doing a whole lot for me. I still have good days and bad days because of everything. I'd probably be doing much better while doing therapy but it's very costly for my current situation so I'll just have to skip it for now. In other words, I wouldn't recommend meds alone. I did a lot of research and reading on the subject before doing it and it seems meds typically have a short term positive impact, but to have a real, beneficial long term impact, seeing a therapist is the way to go. If I was you, I'd do some research, develop some questions, then go see your general practicioner and ask for which direction he thinks you should go.
  13. eyeswideopen
    That's called dry humping and you didn't actually do anything except grind each other. Same thing as grind dancing with a guy but you were laying down. If you are a virgin, and want to remain one, smart move stopping it there cause that's usually a precursor to something further down the physical road. If all you did was french kiss (I'm going back to early days here to try and remember) and he didn't rub you anywhere, then you got to first base. Since you sound real young, I will not describe what the other bases are but if you're smart enough to find this site, then you're smart enough to look it up on the net.
  14. eyeswideopen
    What kinds of things is she into? IS she in college? What's her major? What's the thing you two have the most in common together?
  15. eyeswideopen
    Maybe I misunderstood but it sounds like your are under 18 years old and he is 41 years old? Did I read that right?
  16. eyeswideopen
    It all sounds strange to me my friend. IF they haven't met.. only chatted.. and your wife is allowing this guy from Sweden to actually talk to your children... I'd have a pretty big problem with it. For one, I wouldn't be calling her my wife anymore and two getting the children out of there. I'd have to agree it's pretty crazy.
  17. eyeswideopen
    She's a liar dude. I'm sorry. Cooking, cleaning, and buying you things are not reasons to stay in a relationship. They're great, but not what makes or breaks it. Here's another question.. did she ask you for the money for the procedure?
  18. eyeswideopen
    I would keep this conversation specifically between you and your therapist for now. You're wife has reassured you, has been married to you for 13 years, and still has sex with you.. there's not much else she can do. It sounds, with the little info you've given, that you've got a good thing going. Ask these same questions to your therapist and see what they say.
  19. eyeswideopen
    If he's still sick he's probably just being a crank * * *. We all are sometimes and if he is usually appreciative as you say, cut him some slack. I woulnd't make a big deal about it. Now, if this turns into a pattern, bring it up.
  20. eyeswideopen
    I've got some questions for ya. One how old are you two and how long have you been together? What were some of the issues that caused the breakup? From the info I have now, it sounds like she'll have fun with you now and be with you, but when something better comes along or what she thinks she wants for a lifetime relationship you'll be pushed aside. Is that something you're willing to risk? Or, ask her why she doesn't see you guys together forever? Maybe she'll spell it out for you.
  21. eyeswideopen
    Time my friend. Time.
  22. eyeswideopen
    Go out with her. Have a good time. I'd only be up front with her if it seems to be going anywhere or if it comes up in regular conversation.
  23. eyeswideopen
    I'm not trying to make you paranoid but if he really does sweat her like you say he does and keeps close to her, I wouldn't trust him at all. He's a guy and most guys think the same. If the opportunity arises, he will most likely take it. I'm going back to my original advice here. Explain how you feel about it, how you respect friendships, but you're starting to get uncomfortable with the situation because of how he really feels about her. Does she know he feels that way? Are you just guessing he feels for her that way?
  24. eyeswideopen
    Tell her how you really feel but don't make any demands or ultimatums.. just express how uncomfortable you are with him because you know how he really feels. Being open and honest with her is one of, if not the, most important part of a relationship. And most importantly, don't expect a great reaction from what you discuss with her. Just get it on the table though and see what happens.
  25. eyeswideopen
    Yes I completely understand. When we broke up, I lost about 18 lbs. in a month. I think it's slowly coming back now but it was at least one and a half months til I got my appetite back and a little over a month til I was able to sleep normally again. Well, now I'm depressed and sleep too much but it's very different from when it all first happened. I have no advice for you though on anything proactive you can do.
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