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gfein347

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Everything posted by gfein347

  1. gfein347
    A great way to make a first impression would be to give him a good handshake, smile, look him in the eye, and introduce yourself. It's understandable that you'll be a little nervous, but just try to relax, be yourself, and interact with your girlfriend's dad the way you would respectfully act around any other adult. With my girlfriend's dad, things started out cordial (and a little awkward) at first, but once we got to know each other, we started goofing around, talking about sports and poker, and quoting movies. Just be who you are, relax, and don't try to rush anything.
  2. gfein347
    You're welcome! I think the situation that you're going through is normal, and maybe could even be expected. Also, I think more often it is the girl that wants to get out, party, and experience the excitement of other guys. Don't ask me why, though . I guess it's just that most girls naturally have doubts about spending their whole life with one guy.
  3. gfein347
    I really, really like the metaphor in the first stanza. Perhaps you could insert another stanza after the first one to connect your two ideas? Well done! Keep writing!
  4. gfein347
    I went through the exact same thing. Well, not the exact same...but it was reasonably similar. My girlfriend told me she was worried she would go through her whole life having only experienced one guy, and that she wanted to be able to go to parties, drink, and have a good time. Basically what you said. So, my girlfriend asked me for an open relationship, and ended up making out with another guy. We're still together, but that phase of our relationship was really tough, and we often talked of breaking up. However, we did get through it, and after awhile, my girlfriend told me she was ready to be exclusive again. I think the lesson to be learned here is that even if she's completely in love with you, it's normal for her to question her relationship, and to answer your question, I highly doubt that what she's going through is permanent. Best of luck!
  5. gfein347
    Wow, I really liked that one too! It's not often we see haiku here on ENA...
  6. gfein347
    Hi everyone, it's been awhile since I've started a thread, but here we go... My girlfriend and I have been together for 16 months, and we're very much in love with each other. Recently, she told me about a dream she had where she was attracted to another guy. She said this dream brought about those feelings of excitement and uncertainty that go along with the beginning of a new relationship. Since her and I have moved past the "honeymoon phase," we've settled into a bit of a routine where we've grown more comfortable with each other. The title really says it all: our relationship, which was once exciting and passionate, now lacks the zest that it used to have. So the question I pose to ENAers is... What do couples do to keep the spark alive in their relationship, and keep themselves from falling into too much of routine?
  7. gfein347
    You don't specify from your original post if you've talked to your friend about this or not. Have you told her that you felt betrayed? If not, I'd recommend doing that first before deciding if you still want her in your life.
  8. gfein347
    Ahh, ok. Well I think when she told you that, you should've informed her right away that you had already asked someone their opinion on the matter. However, this is much better than the other scenario, so I think an apology, along with a demonstration that you're truly sorry (and that you're completely trustworthy) will go a long way in repairing your relationship.
  9. gfein347
    Like luvursmile said, it could be insecurity. Or perhaps he feels he's being neglected in some way.
  10. gfein347
    Personally, I think you should be honest with your SO about what happened. Let him/her know that what happened will only happen once, and you feel awful that it ever happened. If my SO did this, I would want to talk about it in hopes that we would avoid similar problems in the future.
  11. gfein347
    Hope- Based on what the OP wrote, we can't be certain if he confided in his friend before or after his girlfriend asked him for confidentiality. To the OP, which is correct? When you talked to your friend about this, had your girlfriend already told you that she didn't want you to tell anyone?
  12. gfein347
    Have you said to him something along the lines of what you said just now? If so, how does he respond?
  13. gfein347
    I'd recommend doing it. Although having a roommate has some certain drawbacks, I think you'll find that it's not as bad as it thinks. I currently live with a roommate in a dorm room, and we don't even see each other all that much. And who knows, you might make a friend!
  14. gfein347
    I agree with northalius. Despite the precedent you've set, I think you need to treat this situation as if this guy had a girlfriend.
  15. gfein347
    Awdree is right. I've seen people say on these boards so many times that suicide is a permanent solution to problems that are temporary. In a year, do you think you'll feel the same way? Maybe you could tell us a little more about why you feel you have nothing to live for?
  16. gfein347
    I agree with Maverick that it's probably not the best idea to fight fire with fire. Though I haven't gone through your other posts, as Scout has, I've never been in favor of the "two wrongs make a right" theory, and I think you'd be disrespecting your girlfriend by doing that. Instead, let her know how you feel. If she really loves you differently than she loves her friends, then her reply should make you feel at ease. Like Scout said, she seems to be craving male attention. Maybe there's a bigger issue that's underlying this one?
  17. gfein347
    If you decide to stay with your girlfriend, are you willing to give her the opportunity to get as close to you as your ex got? If so, I think you need to tell this to your girlfriend. Even though your relationship with your ex went sour, surely your current girlfriend must understand that being together for a longer time leads to a greater degree of intimacy.
  18. gfein347
    As far as legal recourse, I'm not sure. Even though you pay the rent there, and to you he's trespassing, his friend also pays the rent there, and to his friend, he's a welcome guest. I think you should talk to your ex's friend about this. Tell him how much you dislike your ex being there and how much it's detracting from your ability to focus on your career. If this doesn't work, is it possible to find another studio?
  19. gfein347
    I think the most important thing here is her insecurity and lack of trust. Although your relationship may be great outside of this, it can only go so far without complete trust. Have you told her that you have no feelings for your ex and that you love only her? Have you asked her why she doesn't trust you?
  20. gfein347
    This could definitely be a red flag. If your SO often says "I love you" and then seems to contradict this with his/her actions, this is something that needs to be talked about. Clearly, you're feeling unloved by your partner, or you wouldn't have made a post about this.
  21. gfein347
    Hi and welcome to ENA! Well, as far as your disagreement about having children, I think this is a pretty big issue in the relationship. No matter that her reasons don't make sense to you, it sounds unlikely that she'll change her mind. With regards to her issues with you ex, I think you need to tell her that the past is over, and you've moved on. You're with your current girlfriend because you love her, and I think you should make that clear to her. Like avman said, she seems to have some trust issues.
  22. gfein347
    Hmm...in very general terms, I guess so. Can you be a little more specific?
  23. gfein347
    Well, if it were me, I'd do everything I could to avoid being in this situation to begin with. However, if it somehow happened, sex wouldn't be on my mind for awhile. I don't think there's anyway I could have sex with someone I barely know. Also, I was thinking the same thing as Halo: is this hypothetical, or are you facing a situation like the one in your question?
  24. gfein347
    I think you're right, but like everyone else, I agree that it's best if you don't meet her. Tell him you're already "over her", and that meeting her would actually cause you to move in the opposite direction.
  25. gfein347
    I agree with DN. There are probably some problems in their marriage that's driving him to do this. I once found a folder of temporary internet files on my dad's computer that contained porn sites. Despite being troubled by it, I decided not to say anything on the premise that I didn't want to cause more problems between my parents. As it turns out, my parents ended up getting divorced, and my telling either one of my parents about this would have only caused more problems. My advice is to forget about this, and let your parents work out their problems on their own.
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