gfein347

Hi all, As the title suggests, my girlfriend and I entered into an open relationship about a month ago. The backstory on that is in another post that I made entitled "what are my options?". To summarize, we're both in college and she felt left out of the "college experience" and wanted to go into an open relationship. She ended up going to a party, drinking, dancing with several guys, and making out with one of them, who was 25 (we're both eighteen). I love her so much and I truly don't think breaking it off is the best option. It happened almost four weeks ago, but it feels like it happened yesterday, and I've probably averaged four hours of sleep a night, instead of my usual eight, and I feel depressed (and sometimes suicidal). I really need some help getting over this. Any advice would be appreciated. --gfein

Annie- Sounds great! Over the past year, I've gotten down from 169 lbs to 137 lbs (I'm five feet, eight inches), and I'll be damned if I'm gonna take a step in the wrong direction.

Hi all, I realize that I recently posted about another issue, so I apologize for posting again so soon. I have a phobia of hypnosis. I don't really understand why it is that I have this phobia, but I suppose that can be expected as a phobia is merely caused by one's amygdala overreacting to a specific stimulus. Despite knowing what causes it, I can't seem to get over my phobia of hypnotism. It's gotten to the point where if I see it on TV while flipping channels, my heart rate and respiration rate both increase dramatically, and I get so nauseated that I usually end up vomiting. Though I don't encounter this all that often, it becomes extremely debilitating when it does happen. My girlfriend mentioned to me that her school is having a hypnotist come tomorrow, and I am nothing short of freaking out. (I should probably note that she mentioned this to me because she was interested in going, but decided not to because I got so upset.) Does anyone have any ideas, or perhaps some experience overcoming a phobia?

rikka: Thanks for the advice What's a GAD group session?

Scout: Thanks for the advice You're absolutely correct, if I could talk to a psychologist with no strings attached I would do it. Opening up to the actual therapist is just one part of it though, and is actually easier because they are bound by a law called HIPAA to very strict medical privacy. I guess what concerns me more is that I'd have to sit in the waiting room, where people could see me and potentially identify me, and then I'd have a file made about me, where people such as nurses could see it and access it, and if I went to a school counselor, there might be a way for administrators at the school to know I sought help, etc. Even as I'm typing this, my pulse is rising as I get nervous about the trust I'd have to place in others to get help.

Hi all, As you can tell by my number of posts, I'm new here. I actually joined to ask about a different problem, but the many insighful responses I've read on this forum have caused me to stay. At any rate, I wanted to ask what I could potentially do to alleviate my anxiety. In doing my own research, I've found that I exhibit symptoms of obsessive-compulsive disorder (i.e. I freak out when my routine gets switched around, and I can't get to sleep if my slippers aren't by my bed). Also, I exhibit symptoms of anxiety, such as sudden panic attacks, constant stress and worrying, and a general mistrust of everyone I come in contact with. I'm posting about this because I feel that given my circumstances, it's almost impossible for me to get professional help. This is due to the fact that I have serious problems opening up to people, and I have such an extreme need for privacy (so much so, in fact, that on days when I'm feeling particularly worried, I won't give my real name when meeting new people). Having turned 18, I could go to a psychologist/therapist, but like I said, I just can't open up to people. Also, being in college, I don't have the money to pay for an appointment (I could ask my parents for help, but then I'd have to tell them about the problems I'm having). The only person I've ever truly opened up to is my girlfriend, and even that took awhile. While she has been quite supportive, neither of us can think of a way to fix this situation, and it's causing severe disruptions in my life, as well as stress in my relationship. Any thoughts or suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!!

Esh: I think it might depend on how long this girl was dating your best friend before they broke up. Also, if you were to talk to your friend about what happened, what do you imagine his reaction might be?

Thanks fisch- Though I'm sure the same advice still applies, I just wanted to clarify for everyone that the relationship isn't long distance. Actually our schools are only about twenty minutes away.

My girlfriend and I started dating in senior year of high school. Now, both freshmen in college, we've been together for over a year. Recently, my girlfriend went to a party with some of her friends, and afterwards, expressed to me that she felt left out at the party because her friends were dancing with other guys while she was unable to. She asked if we could be in an open relationship so she could experience "college life" while still keeping our relationship intact. A little confused, I agreed, as long as she kept me informed about what she was doing with other guys. Fast forward a few days, and she tells me that she danced with and made out with some 25 year old guy (we're both eighteen) at a party after having a few drinks. I've told her that I feel hurt, but she says making out with me is different (because it expresses love) than making out with someone else (because it's just an activity). We've talked about the possibility of breaking up, but we would both prefer to stay in the relationsihp and somehow make it work. I'm still very much in love with her, and I don't want this relationship to end. Any advice would be appreciated.

My girlfriend and I started dating in senior year of high school. Now, both freshmen in college, we've been together for over a year. Recently, my girlfriend went to a party with some of her friends, and afterwards, expressed to me that she felt left out at the party because her friends were dancing with other guys while she was unable to. She asked if we could be in an open relationship so she could experience "college life" while still keeping our relationship intact. A little confused, I agreed, as long as she kept me informed about what she was doing with other guys. Fast forward a few days, and she tells me that she danced with and made out with some 25 year old guy (we're both 18) at a party after having a few drinks. I've told her that I feel hurt, but she says making out with me is different (because it expresses love) than making out with someone else (because it's just an activity). We've talked about the possibility of breaking up, but we would both prefer to stay in the relationsihp and somehow make it work. I'm still very much in love with her, and I don't want this relationship to end. Any advice would be appreciated.