Jetta
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Everything posted by Jetta
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The best thing to do is just make yourself do it, or have a buddy to work out with that will push on the days you just don't feel like it. Eventually you'll make it a habit and will feel like crap on the days you don't get around to it.
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I'd love to move out, but I'm unemployed. I debated about postponing the divorce but opted to go forward, which was probably pretty stuipid but it's done now. My attorney said it's not uncommon for divorced couples to live together to get the house in order for sale. But one of the biggest problems we have is the fact he hates doing anything around the house. He wouldn't leave or let me have the house so we are where we are. I'll likely have to just leave which means I'll lose my portion of the equity because the house will go to hell and we owe his parents money. I just wanted to get the house together so I could move on, and that is why I stayed married for as long as I have but he kept spending the money planned to get the yard finished.
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Brando, Yes I am dealing with more than that, which has me thinking something is seriously wrong with me. I also don't get how people can shut things off so fast. It makes no sense to me. I feel like crap, like it was all a big lie. Maybe he's doing it to get back at me. Well it worked.
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So my ex of 2 days returned home saying he met someone he just clicks with and wanted to know what I thought of him asking for her number. Shocked is how I feel. I knew he'd meet someone eventually but I really didn't think he would in 2 days! We're still living together. Sure the divorce was amicable, and we get along, but now I'm just not doing well. I've been doing badly since I got let go at that job, although still searching I'm just in a funk I can't seem to get out of. I didn't think I'd care if he met someone, well I guess I do. And that alone surprises me. Now I'm really sitting here wondering if I made a huge mistake. I mean he's not all bad, and maybe I do love him. I mean why would I care if I didn't? I really hate this. I wish life were simple. Oh the guy I thought I was all giddy for, well I haven't seen him all week. I know he moved (same area just different place). I think he's avoiding me on purpose. I'm not sure why exactly but my theory is he really doesn't want to be the rebound guy so he's letting me work through my emotions alone. Well I hate being alone and it truly sucks. I'm suicidal because I really just don't deal well with life basically. Man he didn't even leave the outside light on for me tonight. He's seriously moved on. I feel like a piece of crap. Why did my 1st husband remarry 6 months after the divorce was final? And now this one has moved on to someone new in 2 days!? What is wrong with me? I just want to die.
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I think it's super cute what you're thinking and feeling about her. I really think you should go up to her and say "Would mind if I gave you a call sometime? Maybe we could go to...". What do you have to lose? NOTHING! If she says no your leaving anyway so even the embarressment factor won't be longlasting. The only thing you'll have is regret if you don't. So go for it!
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My opinion is that is unusual to have that kind of urge at your age. I do know there is a biological clock that generally goes off in the mid-late twenties for most women. That's an average based on experience and that of my friends. But I really do think it's uncommon for an 18 year old to feel that way, but I'm not expert on biology.
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8 months pregnant and husband left me
Jetta replied to buggalicious1118's topic in Relationship Advice
Listen to DN on this. You are hormonal for one thing and may regret this decision. And I agree that everything your husband said about you has some truth to it. I can also see that you feel neglected and yes he should take that into consideration. Marriage counseling is the way to go. -
Thanks Brando. I know in my heart it's the right thing. I think it's just adjusting to the change that's a bit more challenging for me. He's been such a part of my life for so long I kind of wonder how it'll go I guess.
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I have some feelings I need to release so I figured why not here. I was having some major uncertainties about having completed the divorce. Both of my really good female friends who were offering advice on how to work throuh things are now helping me move on with my life, which I really surprised about in 1 case since she sort of introduced us. I've told them about my reservations and they have both made me aware that it really is the right decision. Wow I'm so lucky to have such good friends. Now I just hope the next steps go as smoothly.
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Maybe she just needs time apart to figure out what she really wants. There is always hope. But you also can't count on her returning to you and need to progress in your own life.
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Think you got what it takes to raise a child....?
Jetta replied to DragonGirl724's topic in Pregnancy
No I don't but it's a little late now. Too damn bad I had to be fertile and stupidly follow the religious rules I was raised on. -
Choices are endless. Why do you think you've run out of them? Really they are. Maybe if you post some of what your going through someone here will have some suggestions for you. Sometimes another perspective is all that is really needed.
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Well my plan was to marry around age 26 and have kids around ages 28-32. I personally think late twenties to early thirties is a good age range for most. Not too young and not old. Once you get older you get more set in your ways and less likely to adjust to anothers nuiances. Life had other plans for me. But I still think that's a good range.
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Read lots of books on parenting and pregnancy. I'd say some fear is normal but it sounds like you're having more than the usual amount, which could just be the shock of it all. Just so you know it doesn't matter how well prepared you think you are, life happens and plans don't always work out. Yes parenting is work, dedication, and sacrifice, but it's also a great joy.
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Oh thanks for the suggestions. I have posted on monster, but will go update my resume.
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I feel like I'm crazy for going through with it yet I feel calm and happy. We talk more now than we ever did, yet I still feel like it's not real. Probably because I haven't moved out yet, which I'm really looking forward to doing for some strange reason. I just wish I could get this job thing figured and move on with my life. Any job searching advice? I am a realtor but being on the shy side it's not working as well for me as I would have hoped. Putting myself out there is just so unnatural for me. I enjoy the various aspects, I just hate selling myself. Since my temp job fell through I'm feeling kind of defeated job wise, and of course now isn't really the best time to be going through that.
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Thanks for the encouragement. My daughter wouldn't even look at me without crying hysterically and calling for daddy. I know it's hard on her. I feel calm this morning so I guess God is with me. It's raining too, wonder if that's a bad sign.
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Oh I don't know how to answer that. I generally e-mail as soon as I read the message, unless I'm just too busy to. I'd say your fine e-mailing her now. Good luck.
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Maintain a friendly relationship with her. Perhaps she is interested in you as well. It's hard to say not being her, but all you can do is see where things go. P.S. I'm going through something similar only I'm the married person. I've never had such strong feelings for a guy. It scares and intrigues me all at the same time. He too overheard me mention divorce. I couldn't stop thinking about him enough to get my life on track before filing. So I really understand that part.
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Music and its influence on one's emotional state
Jetta replied to easyguy's topic in Emotions and Feelings
The music I listen to varies depending on my mood. If I'm mad it's angry music, if I'm happy it's peppy, etc. Music is my life, it helps me cope and always has. I used to bang on the piano as a teen when I was upset about something. Now I sing and listen to loud music because I no longer have access to a piano. Thankfully I'm a good singer, so people generally compliment me rather than gripe about it. -
I say keep in touch. If she opts to discontinue contact with you don't press, but do try.
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And I'm praying for a miracle now. I don't want to postpone it but I need money! My clients haven't gotten back to me yet so I'm thinking no news is good news. A house they were semi interested in just lowered the price, and I think they're discussing it. I'm really hoping they decide to put in an offer in on it, and of course list their current home with me. I'm also going to get 1/2 of the equity from our house so I suppose it's not as bad as it feels right now. I just really hate being in limbo! I do have people I could move in with if it comes down to it. I just really wish I wouldn't have to go there. It's nearly a repeat of 10 years ago. Even the car accident was similar. Freaky! Only of course I'm older, now with 2 kids instead of 1 and obviously not much wiser.
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I agree there is a lot wrong in this world. The fact that physical beauty is deemed more valuable that a persons spirit will never make sense to me. The only advise I have for you is the change the way you view the world. You're in a prison because you believe yourself to be a prison. You could very well be freer here than you would be anywhere. A book I highly recommend is Mind Power by John Kehoe. link removed is the website. That is the book that has helped me through some very difficult times in my life, as well as other similar books. The truth is we create our our realities by the thoughts that we posses. What you believe to be true is the truth you live. And just reading this post shows me you have some very negative beliefs going on. You need to retrain your thinking and your life will benefit greatly. Yes I'm a work in progress, but it really does work.
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RayKay I'm totally supportive of him being a good father to her. I've been making it very clear for a while now that he is her father and needs to be there for her. We're doing shared custody. Brando that is just like my soon to be ex. I'm peeved just thinking about it. Newts that is exactly the kind of stuff that's happening now. He's getting more serious about starting his own business, if he does I'll be shocked since he's only toyed with the idea forever now. Based on what you're saying it just may happen. Part of me thinks he's just trying to get my goat. I'm now at the I'd believe it if I saw it and by then I'll have a different life going so who cares.
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I'd try once more and then let her go. She may be playing you or she could have missed the call, saw it on caller ID and wanted to let you know that she is really interested but isn't the kind of girl who calls guys. One more call and then let it go no matter how she acts towards you.