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fallslikerain

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Everything posted by fallslikerain

  1. fallslikerain
    let sleeping dogs lay. will finding out about every detail of her past sex life really do anything to improve your relationship? Probably not, unless if you like being jealose.
  2. fallslikerain
    yeah, you're lucky; a mile is walking distance... unfortunetly I can't walk 75 miles
  3. fallslikerain
    i'm sorry you feel that way, you mentioned your life is "empty" what would make it full?
  4. fallslikerain
    hi, i'm sorry to hear that your having problems in your relationship and you feel there is a double standard. Have you talked to her in detail as to what the problem is? Do you still have feelings for her? If you are only staying in the relationship because you do not want to "hurt" her or "surprise" her, although I feel that you are trying to be considerate, it is not in her best interest. All loving people should be loved in return, at least in theory. If you don't still care about her, or you feel the relationship is unsalvagable(and it takes 2 to repair a relationship, never try to keep someone who isn't trying to keep you)you should move on so she can too, and so you can both find someone to love again. As to your question on timing, agreed breaking up with someone over holiday break might not be your best option, but you should weigh the pros and cons. Its probably not going to be easy on the both of you regardless of when it happens, however in the winter break you have a month for the two of you to calm down, as opposed to going in the school year when you are both on top of each other in your classes and schedules. You do have a third option though, besides breaking up with her and talking to her about it, you can ask her if the two of you could take a break from each other(a temporary breakup, preferably of the no contact variety) this might help the two of you see the situation clearer and get a better understanding of what you want, it sounds like you feel unappreciated. I hope for the best with you and your current situation
  5. fallslikerain
    i'm starting to feel better already, thank you very much shygirl!
  6. fallslikerain
    I have lately been very nervous and stressed out, which causes me to be nauseas. Does anyone have anytips for overcoming nausea other than "see a doctor"? I'm trying to relax and that helps a little. thanks
  7. fallslikerain
    I agree with past posters, she's probably just unsure where she stands with you and wants to think she's important to you. as for the once a week seeing each other, where does it say you have to see each other 30 times a day when you just first start dating? provided things go well you both have 70 years to get bored with each other.
  8. fallslikerain
    just try to treat him good, ask him about himself, hold your own in conversation, don't make him do all the work. I would advise against saying "i'll never hurt you" to him, its kinda like when someone tries to say "trust me" you are always taken back. If he was hurt in the past and wants to talk to you about it, he will when he feels comfortable. Some people don't like talking about ex's, they'd rather be working on mr/miss right in front of them, than complaining about yesterday. its cool that you care, best of luck
  9. fallslikerain
    sorry to hear about your plans being broken just remember to stay relaxed about meeting the folks, it can be really terrible, or it can be really easy(the easiest parent meeting I ever had was a "how old am I? do you have enough gas in your car? and a handshake?" a weird mix of questions, but that was it) just try to relax and be yourself
  10. fallslikerain
    let me just clear up one thing about control. THAT DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE CONTROLLING THE GIRL it just means that you're in control of yourself(selfcontroll)and controll of your situation.
  11. fallslikerain
    maybe someone could give me gift ideas as well. I've been dating a girl for about a month, and would like to get her something for the holidays, but I don't want to scare her off and buy her something too fancy and what not, but I would also like it to be meaningfull. I also don't have a load of money.
  12. fallslikerain
    hair loss can be caused by a very wide range of issues. Does hair loss run in your family? really the only one who can diagnose your hair loss is your doctor, you should make an appointment.
  13. fallslikerain
    at one point I sorta felt like I was in your situation, heck, maybe to an extent it still worries me. When i first started dating I seriously had like 5 girls in a row lead me on and drop me for other guys (usually significantly older/richer than me). It has definetly made me more cautious(perhaps too much) with giving my heart away, but I've learned a lot from it all and have recently improved my confidence significantly. I now feel that i'm in good mental shape for the most part, and I wouldn't have this experience if everything hadn't happened. I'm sorry you've had it rough so far emotionally, but if you let people who hurt you in the past, hurt you in the present, you'll never be able to live in the present. Instead of worrying about mr. yesterday just try to do your best with mr. standing right in front of you
  14. fallslikerain
    well that answers that sounds alright to me, i was just thinking of making a gift giving question post myself
  15. fallslikerain
    you massaging her, or you giving her a gift certificit to a massage place?
  16. fallslikerain
    thanks for the advice, i'm still upset though, i got a lot of work done tonight and it made me feel a little better. Theres still this one presentation i have to give monday evening thats driving me nuts, everytime I think about it my eye starts twitching
  17. fallslikerain
    If two people get along well enough they can probably be happy doing just about anything. I like the past couple of posts, there are definetly divisions of dating and activities. My problem is that I like more fun and talking dates as opposed to entertainment dates, and being how its very cold outside and I live in a pretty nothing town, there isn't much to do.
  18. fallslikerain
    Hi all, I was wondering if anyone had tips on how to relieve work related stress. I've been extremely stressed at college because i have several large finals coming up, and many projects and papers due. I always feel behind, and I don't see how I'm going to have enough time for any of them. On top of that, i have numerous performances coming up as well, none of which i have enough time to practice for. Right now i'm just trying to get as much work done as possible, the way I see it, the sooner I finish the sooner i'll feel better. Does anyone have other ways I might cope with this? Thank you
  19. fallslikerain
    I just want to start by saying that i'm sorry your feeling this way, a lot of people unfortunetly do. I don't think anyone can make the decission for you whether to give up on it or try to rebuild your relationship. One thing you can do regardless is learn from the experience, so you can relate it to future relationships or this one if you both decide to continue it. Try to think back 6 months ago when she started to have doubts about the relationship. Perhaps there were changes that you missed? Signals? As for her, she's only 19 herself, and maintaining a long distance relationship with anyone is very hard regardless of age. Only seeing someone 12 times in the course of 9 months really isn't that much. Did you talk on the phone/im a lot? Perhaps she wanted a boyfriend who she could see more often? I know some people(myself included) don't feel that relationships over the phone really are the same as relationships in person. If 80% of what a person says is in their body langauge and voice infliction, if your only talking you the phone you miss out on the majority of that 80%, IM is even worse. in IM both parties could be talking to literally dozens of other people or doing work etc. Either way, neither of them are particularly great for bonding and intamacy. Would she happen to be a senior in high school? That can be an extremely stressfull point in life, especially if your looking at different colleges and trying to fill out applications.
  20. fallslikerain
    Hi Sankin I do think this is a great place to go for advice or to vent, I feel the majority of the people who seriously go here are kind giving people, who truly want to help others. Although this may sound cliche, happiness is being happy with what you have, not what you don't have. Instead of focusing on everything wrong in your life, and allowing them to run your life, think of some of the good things going for you, even if there are only a few you can think of at first. As for your social life, Its been my experience that you can't let other people be the only source of your happiness. Happiness has to come from within. Do you have friends that you hang out with? Or have anyone you chat with that might want to hang out(guys and girls, good friends and casual friends included)? Although it can feel frustrating if you have a lot of platonic girl friends, and not a girlfriend. they can be a great way for you to meet girls that would be interested in relationships, perhaps they have friends, or other girls would see you in public with them. Not to say you should be using your friends solely for this purpose. Hanging out with your friends will help you put your relationships in perspective. Also, have you been trying to meet new people? Joining any clubs? In school? If only 1 out of 50 girls you asks out says yes, you may get 49 no's, but you have to remember that one of them is gonna be a yes. And if you don't like her or she's has a bad attitude, you gotta start over Hope i was of some help, i'll be around if you ever want to talk
  21. fallslikerain
    well, its not about breakups per say, but it is an excellent read Hal Urbans - "Lifes 20 greatest lessons" (or something along those lines)
  22. fallslikerain
    everything can change, and i'm glad your already trying to improve yourself and be the best you can be at just 14. I applaud you.
  23. fallslikerain
    I think everyone has made really excellent points. Even as a guy, I've had people screw me over, and it totally makes me weary of commitment or letting myself open myself up for such possible punishment. As for her, if you know she has this problem your already one step ahead of the game, a lot of guys don't find out this problem till its too late. Just take things slow, and don't make her feel pressured in anyway to reciprocate feelings. That doesn't mean that you let her treat you like poop, it just means you let her go at her own pace, whether it be emotional, verbal intamacy, touching, etc. best of luck
  24. fallslikerain
    don't try to make it so casual that there could be misunderstanding as to whether or not its a date. You don't want to be on a non-date with someone who wouldn't agree to have a date-date with you. Casual Ideas... Coffee, light dinner, lunch, mini golf, bowling. Keeping it not too short, not too long (lean on the short side). Unless if you've known the girl for quite some time and have talked alot you probably want to avoid movies/shows/dinner since you don't get to talk during those dates.
  25. fallslikerain
    It really depends on whether or not they both want to be "best" friends or if one of them would like to be best friends, but has romantic interest in the other, which could lead to stress.
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