RagingBull

He's probably setting you up as a backup if his current relationship doesn't work out.

How about an ice cream place instead of a coffee shop?

If you can do a formal presentation in front of a class then you should be able to handle a conversation. What you need are listening skills and practice. You sound like a structured guy to me. Just go with the flow and let conversations take their natural path. As far as ice breaking, the best thing way to approach someone is to notice something unique about them and ask a question about it. If a girl is walking a dog, I'd ask about her dog. After that discussion, I begin to ask her questions about herself. I once asked a cashier once about a pendant she was wearing that I honestly have never seen before. She openned up to me really quickly by telling me how she got it and revealed where she was originally from. That gave me alot to talk about. Throughout the conversation, she will start to reveal bits of information about herself. Remember these tidbits and return to them before the conversation abruptly dies. Remember to be fun and playful in your conversations. Humor goes a long way, especially with women. Feel free to PM me.

As a guy, I totally agree with muneca. My ex was particularly possessive and that caused problems between us because I'm a friendly guy. I loved her, and I would never have cheated on her. It's really unloving when your girlfriend won't trust you.

Yes, it's also called Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) according to Psychiatric DSM-IV in the United States. Usually it hits people in season other than summer, so I'm not familiar with how summer SAD works. A major contributor to this illness is the lack of exposure to light. Thus light therapy is an option. I'm not sure if spending more time outdoors will help though.

I used to chat with a girl on IM for several months on end. I just asked how her day was and she would start talking endlessly. I learned a great deal about her. The thing was that I never volunteered any information about myself so she always had to keep in contact with me to learn about me. We would never run out of topics to talk about because she would either tell me about her day or I will ask about it.

FallenAngel101, Does she flirt with you in any way? Does she look you in the eye? What have you told her so far? I agree with goddess23. You must let a girl know that you're attracted to her in some way as soon as possible so that she can start thinking of you as romantic material. Hopefull it's not too late for you. Tell her that lately you find her attractive and then ask her out. Hopefully she hasn't already decided to only make you her friend.

I usually ask a girl about her day. That usually leads to a good discussion and you get to learn more about her.

Coming from a psychology background I was biased towards the use of psychoactive medications. That was until my Psychology professor whom I respect told me that she had made a mistake in sending her own daughter to psychotherapy without the use of anti-depressant medication. Her moral to the story was that psychotherapy in combination with appropriate psychoactive medication is more effective than any treatment administered exclusively. I am seeking anti-anxiety medication so that I may be able to think better so i can reprogram myself during cognitive behavioral therapy. I don't intend to use medications forever, just as a crutch until I'm done with treatment. The issue with me is time. I was able to overcome my fear of public speaking but it took several months and a college speech class. I discovered alcohol had an effect on me when I realized I can keep my mind focused on one task when intoxicated. I can think alot more clearly when I'm moderately intoxicated. Alcohol doesn't always work since my anxiety has hit me so hard sometimes alcohol doesn't work that I'm nervous and tipsy at the same time. I don't have a problem with approaching women though, ironically I love talking to people. It's at some random inconvenient time in the conversation that is going well when anxiety begins to build up quickly and I feel like I have to cut the conversation short and take a breather.

Being honest will make it alot less painful for him. Let him ask you questions, it'll help him get some closure and move on with his life.

I think it's not that you are ignoring her that make her "bug" you. I believe it's because you're giving her room to pursue you. It's like girls feel like they are in control of the relationship when they pursue you rather than you pursue them. My last relationship was where I let my ex pursue me 80% of the time. I found out that when I pursued her too much she got turned her off. Then again, alot of women, I've dated tended to be like this.

Just curious. What's the going rate for highlights?

I would suggest not setting a goal of walking every night, you'll get bored of that very easily. Perhaps just set a goal of walking a only a few times a week. Add in other forms of exercise on days you're not walking. Add aerobics, dance lessons, jogging, bicycling, strength training, martial arts, or a sports activities if you can. Try to have fun when you exercise. I'm looking into getting a portable MP3 player so I can listen to music when I run.

I don't think it really means anything, although it is a bit odd. Maybe he's used to girls making the moves on him.

Sounds like you're with a boring guy, quite predictable and consistent. Doesn't seem like he's being himself. Perhaps he needs more time to warm up to you.

I know people are "too nice". Mainly they seem to lack confidence. They are afraid of hurting your feelings and unsure of themselves. It makes you worry about breaking their feelings. It's hard to be playful with these "sensitive" types. Being well rounded can help you more confident, but then again I know both men and women who are well rounded but not confident when interacting with people. The lack of confidence seems to be the most important thing that makes or breaks an attraction.

warnerbro1 and FreemanIG88, I know how you feel. What makes it even more interesting is that I'm also a bit impulsive and bold sometimes. I can be very friendly one minute and very cold the next, and all this time I thought I was just weird as my friends would say. Goddess4ever, hehe, the irony in this is that I'm also a Psychology major, but I guess I have very poor introspection skills as I couldn't even diagnose my own condition without the help of a psychologist. One thing I've learned from my Psychology professor is that the best method for therapy is a combination of psychotherapy and psychiatric intervention (drugs). It seems that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is the rage these days. I guess I'll probably be on some anti-anxiety medication and in therapy for a few weeks and be able to rid myself of this disorder.

Wow, I think all you can do is be there for her by listening to her and providing support. I wouldn't recommend trying to fix her problems. Gently move her towards psychotherapy. Your girlfriend has been through significant trauma and abuse and really needs help. It'll be impossible to develop a relationship with a partner this badly battered. If you can help her get her through therapy and recovery then she will love you for it.

That's typical of guys staying in a relationship even though it's a bad one. I'm going to assume that he decided that you aren't the one for him but is telling you that he's not sure about you because he doesn't want to leave the relationship even though it's dead. Just in case I'm wrong, I would suggest you initiate a break in the relationship where you begin dating other people while leaving the option of getting back together later on.

Please edit your post and add line breaks to create several paragraphs. It's an interesting story but it is tedious to read as one paragraph. Anyways, either this guy is really good at playing games or he's disrespectful of you in my honest opinion. I don't know too many women that would put up with that much "abuse". Seriously, it seems like you are too attracted to him. Unfortunately he knows you will date him at his convenience and not your's. Just be careful. It's OK to send him a short email wondering if everything is alright. You might seem needy if you ask where you stand in the relationship.

I'd go for it. She may be the one for you. Don't let a fear of losing a friendship get in the way.

Woah, that's just wrong. Was he drunk or smoking something when he asked you this? You can't blame yourself for feeling like a fool because you didn't know he was like this.

Tough situation. I had an ex that would demand alot of online time from me, around 5-6 hours average per day for weeks on end!!! Eventually life caught up to me and I had to pull away, which she really ended up hating me for that. I fell in love with my ex because we had amazing chemistry, and I loved talking with her. Beware, online and phone time is very very dangerous. Why does she need to go out with you on a date if she can talk to you on the phone? Dates are much more meaningful than phone time and chat time, so try to limit online time; but don't forget to always plan a bunch of dates that she can look forward to. I've learned a few things from my crazy online sessions with my ex. When you do talk online, let her do most of talking. Divulge as little information about yourself as possible. Make sure you end the conversation with her first under the notion that you have to do something important and that you really enjoy talking with her.

I wouldn't try to force anything but just be natural and relaxed. Everyone is born to flirt, but forcing things makes things seem unnatural.

So what's the problem? I'm just kidding. But yeah sex without love does leave you feeling empty. Anyhow, just look for girls outside of your workplace. Try a church, take ballroom dance lessons, or volunteer. Just curious, what type of place do you work at?