street
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i know where u r coming from, my ex of 4 months has someone else even though she says she still has strong feelings for me.. anyway since i have cut contact ( 2 weeks worth) im feeling alot better.. i know its hard i couldn't do it for 3 months but it does help u get over them.. these relationships r rebounds, but what do we get out of it if they fail nothing, as i know i will never get back with her...just live ur life and enjoy..someone else will come along
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it was 4 year relationship, i hope it doesn't take 4 years... i think i will know when i meet someone who i want to date..im ok on my own, where as some people arent and jump from relationship to another.. like u said being on ur own allows u to grow and improve urself...
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When should I date again? Its been 4 months since the break up. I still have strong feelings for her but weather I still love her im not sure…shes got someone else which kinda hurt at first but has actually helped me get over her.. I was abit peeved that she got someone before me but then its not a competition and I think im doing things the right way, not getting involved in a rebound relationship..she told me she still has very strong feelings for me..so im not quite sure why she is involved with someone else, but that's her choice Im enjoying being single, but do miss having someone there..abit lonely..but is that a reason to try and date someone just for the sake of it
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i know where ur coming from i nearly went to the docs asking for medication, but didn't want to give my ex the satisfaction of putting me on drugs to get over her!!! also im scared of getting addicted to them.. i hope it makes u feel better and when u come off them ur better for it, i don't know enough about them really.. im at the same stage as u 4 months, and she has someone else now although i think its a rebound.. pm if u wanna chat as we seem at a smililar stage..we could help each other.. cheers
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Looks like im back on the market people. I told u the ex told me she is going out with someone else, which at first hurt like hell. But ive weathered that and in a way feel like it has actually helped me, theres no going back now..shes on holiday with him now.. On Sunday I saw her parents and told them I can't stay friends with them at the moment. As they were making contact with me on the weekend and I didn't feel happy with this.. they respected my decision.. I know they will tell her when she gets back that I don't want contact with any of them for a while..but do u think I should explain the situation to her when she gets back?? As before she went she said will speak 2 u when I get back!! Just feel I would like to explain my decision to her..or should I just leave it and let her think whatever she wants!!
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perhaps i do care too much, i don't want her back!! shes changed so much i can't see the girl i loved anymore...just care for her like a sister i suppose...i think she has to learn from her mistakes.. just don't want some older guy taking advantage of her!! anyway know she has these new man, i proplay won't speak 2 her for a long time, not far on him for me to be hanging around!! time to get tough i reckon
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My ex of 4 months split has told me she has been seeing someone else for the last month, she got very upset when she told me but I respected her for telling me..anyway is this a rebound??..she still has very strong feelings for me so why is sheing getting into another relationship so soon..i know im not ready for that yet Hes also just coming out of a marriage hes 29 shes 21..so there both on the rebound I suppose.. Its not that I don’t want it to work so we can get back together, its just I still care for her and don’t want her hurt..perhaps im too caring..just wanted ur views on rebound relataionships and weather they work
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Good bye letter to ex-Need your opinion guys.
street replied to reborn's topic in Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend Relationships
spot on i reckon, very moving..send it! -
Well this post really puts my ex to bed. She told me 2day shes seeing someone else!!! Hes 29 8 years older than her and 3 years older than me…says shes been with him 2 weeks and this is the best bit is going on holiday with him for a week 2morrow!! Which makes me think its been going on longer than that how could u go away with someone u have been with for 2 weeks, plus it’s the bloke who sent her that text message when we were going out, so perhaps it was going on then..its been 4 months now so long enough I think its abit laughable really, but then she has to make these mistakes..i always thought she would trade me in for someone younger and better looking, ive seen him and to be honest hes not all that!! But I suppose that’s final closure for me..i was really strong when she told me, she was crying!! But then there was an insult she called me his name, I know her mum and dad are very worried about her but she has to learn for herself…anyway I will continue to help others on here but my story really is over now!!
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what u may do is what my girlfriend did to me, well not sure if she was finding other men attractive but she told me she wanted to be single, as she had just turned 21 and we had been together since she was 17.. obviously i was devastated but i respected her decision, i think u need to make the break, ur having big doubts..not sure how old ur boyfriend is but im 25 and had got the single life out of my system, but ur boyfrind could be different, perhaps he needs to be single as well... the grass isn't always greener and perhaps u won't find someone better, but u need to find that out now, as what happens if u marry and then decide u need to be single..best to do it now, thats how i looked at it when my ex broke up with me, at least we weren't married.. u need ur independance for a while, my ex has no regrets and is really enjoying herself..who knows one day we could get back the same could happen to u. talk to him, communication is the key...we didn't do that she just told me out of the blue and i know she was talking to others, and them knowing before me really upset me..
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Hey try not too stress too much, ur trying to hard..love will come along I promise..i feel like u do sometimes, I did found love and lost it and I know feel sometimes I won't find it again.. I didn't have my first proper girlfriend till I was 21, sure there were girls before but no one serious..and u know what it came along when I was least expecting it and when I wasn't looking for it..this is what Im going to do know just chill out with my mates and one day someone special will come along.. U sound like a decent bloke, just keep going out and enjoying urself show some confidence(this is something im struggling with at the moment, so I know its not easy) and some girl will think hey hes cool and fun to be around I want to spend some time with him..and in the meantime enjoy urself… Ur young with plenty of time, being single is fun u know, being in a relationship isn't all its cracked up to be sometimes Hope I helped
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I feel for u I do, as I lost my first love..its hard but u have to move on and take the positives from the relationship..i sometimes think I will never find someone like her, someone I get on so well with..maybe I won't or maybe I will find someone I get on just as well with but in different areas.. The harsh part is she has moved on by the sounds of it so u have to do the same..u can't keep going on that u made all the mistakes, I don't know the full story but surely u can't keep blaming urself like this.. U have to learn from these mistakes and then put them into practice with the next person, they will be very lucky as u now know how to make a relationship work… I just look at my break up as it obviously wasn't meant to be, I cherish the memories but that is all they are now…in a way its exciting meeting someone new, but like u I sometimes doubt I ever will.. We just have to stay postive that it will happen, as in the mood u r now, u will push people away.. Take care
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For people who have been following my story im sure they will now I have been through lots of up and downs, its been nearly 4 months now since I was dumped and the downs have got less.. the weekend was hard seeing her with someone else, someone else I think she may have been seeing/or have feelings for while we were going out..but I have accepted it..perhaps I needed to know this as I never got a reason from her so perhaps I have my reason now..people who cheat will get what they deserve maybe not now but later on in life!! On the home straight now, edging closer to the finish line of recovery..its funny but I was chatting to my dad who has kept very quiet through all this, and he said one sentence to me, "u deserve better" and I think that is how I will leave my story… Thanks for listening..
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ur all right, contact has to stop..as things like this pop up and get me thinking again, which is not healthy! so thats it over finished for good..goodbye!! if i went a whole year with no contact, there would be no need to be friends as i wouldn't need her in my life.. thanks
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The ex phoned me up last nite, to chat about her marathon race…anyway I asked her who the bloke she was running with..well I know who he is..basically he is a friend she has known for a while… The funny thing is about a month before we split I found a text message on her phone from him saying something like "alright my darling, really missing hope u can cheer me up soon" well anyway I confronted her about it, and she said he must have sent it to the wrong person..so I didn't think anymore of it…well a month later we split..she never gave me a reason..now I see her with him… I can handle her being with him now(as hes abit of a loser, and 8 years older than her and divorced, not much of a catch), but I can't handle it if she was messing about with him when with me..i know its in the past but I can't help thinking about it and feeling a fool!! It could have been a mistake him sending her a text, but its not that easy to send the wrong person a message is it
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SURVEY:Best way to tell ex to stop contacting you
street replied to reborn's topic in Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend Relationships
i would just ignore his calls, thats what im doing with my ex now..and if i really want to reply to emails and calls i will... i have thought about telling my ex to stop calling me but like u said it gives them power and lets them think that ui can't handle speaking to them... lets give ourselfs some power... -
the last thing that could hurt me
street replied to street's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
thanks reborn i will still be checking my pm, just going to hang around to help others, as i think i have done all my grieving now, hey i will post but it will only be with happy stories about myself.. thanks for all ur help. -
this will proplay be my last post about me, i will stick around to try and help others. saw the ex with another bloke, they looked pretty friendly to me if u know what i mean, i guess my thoughts were correct she has someone else. he looked a nice enough bloke, abit younger and better looking than me so fair play to her..it was the last thing that could have hurt me and in a way im glad it has happened now. i can finally finally move on, when someone dumps u its a massive insult..this person doesn't want u in their life anymore..thats hard to take in expecially when its not what u want.,. but life goes on and i feel im moving on now..i get the dark days and 2day was one, but im feeling better now..surround urself with friends and family..u still feel alone but it helps... just going to put all my efforts into my work and uni studies..improve myself for when miss right comes round that corner though at the moment i can't ever see her turning up..prhaps i will be alone for ever, u just never now!
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i can relate to everything u have just said as its exactly how i feel at the moment, i myself feel so much better..i still love my ex and im pretty sure she still loves me but we just weren't meant to be together... i just feel very sad that it came to this.. anyway im glad ur feeling better as i am 2, lets keep up the good work.. take care
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30-35 is proplay abit old im 25, the ex was 21 so im looking at someone my age who wants the same thing as me…as she just suddenly decided she didn't want to settle down e.g. buy a house.. she wants to party which is fair enough, just feel we could have made it if she had got this out of her sytem b4 we met..oh well.. ur right about the envy rather than the jealous, I have other single friends so im going on plenty of lads nite outs, but haven't got the confidence to approach any girls just yet..will proplay have to wait for them to approach me, which is the way I have met almost all my old girlfriends…im not the most confident person as u can tell… my ex and I were friends first, got to know each other and then decided to go out..i want that again which is diffulcult to get by approaching girls in nite clubs… so perhaps I need to join a club so I can do that.
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Oh dear, feel bad 2day…went out with my closet friends last nite 2 couples…the couples that we used to go out with…I think I should stick to hanging out with my single mates..but there my best mates.. It just brings back memories of when the 6 of us used to go out…in a way im jealous of them and that's something I never thought I would say…they both have houses with their partners planning to get married..something me and the ex had all planned till she went and ruined it..sorry people just needed to vent my anger with someone!! Just feel so lonely..where can I meet some nice more mature ladies that want the same things as me!
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Any tips on this speech I have to make?? *Nervous*
street replied to pimpcess's topic in Friendship and Friends
ive got a best mans speech 2 do next may and im bricking it, also im the best man obvousily and the ex is maid of honour(there are closet friends) anyway thats a whole different story any way by then i could be married myself! u will be fine, if its anything like ur poems it will be quality...but i know ur worried about the delivery of the speech, thats what im worried about and also people not laughing at my jokes! i say have a large drink before hand and relax! what do they say imagine the audience naked! -
thanks reborn, it really helps all the kind comments on here..im beginning to feel proud of myself for getting this far... we are at a similar stage and were both doing each other proud! you give the best advice! lets keep up the good work, speak soon
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Having a hard time letting go...
street replied to bdwiii's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
That is hard not knowing the reason, but when I split up with my ex we talked and she still couldn't give me a proper reason… I just accepted it and moved on, but her being mad with you can't be easy especially by the sounds of it u did nothing wrong… You could give a while let her have space and time to think and then ask if u could meet for a chat..but in my experience whenever I tried to speak 2 my ex she just got angry and said theres nothing left to say..we all need closure and a reason though..she sounds very mixed up! Breaking up is so hard, but people do cope with it and find happiness again..it does get easier honest! Hope I haved helped abit -
i understand what u mean, it still hurts a hell of alot to lose someone u love, but just trying to make sense of life really... u just have to relise there is always someone worse off than u..sometimes these things help u understand what u have going for you..it doesn't take the pain away though.. im fighting the feelings of loss every day.. take care