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Jjasonn28

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  1. Jjasonn28
    Hey Okane24 Sorry to hear about what you are going through. Fortunately, many of us here have felt and still feel those same things, and can completely relate. I have a couple observations though... I think that your cousin may have a valid point. She may have had the exact same thoughts when she saw the new pictures you had posted. That picture could very well be just a friend or merely an acquaintance of hers. Her motives for posting it could be in reaction to what she saw on your site? I mean, you say the photos you posted are harmless, just of you sitting on a couch with women, and in a club. But to her, it could come accross as much more than that... Just a thought. This is another reason I agree with your cousin that she may just be reacting to what she saw. The last thing you should do is break NC, especially to confront her. Wether shes doing this out of spite or not doesn't matter. Contacting her, and being confrontational will only push her away, and be detrimental to your chances of reconciling. You Love her. You have made that clear. I know its hard to see that stuff, and it tears you up. Your mind will go crazy thinking of all these scenarios. My opinion is that you ride it out. Wait for her to return before contacting her again. Meanwhile, find a positive outlet for your emotions. I know that is vague, and I apologize. The important thing here, is that you keep your emotions in check. Be strong.
  2. Jjasonn28
    LOL. I am a goaltender... I think you have something there... the pucks to the head are probably whats keeping me sane This is good to hear. I can only imagine how hard it is to take that step. But by doing it, you are saying to her, to yourself and to everyone else, that you are strong, and ready to do what is best for you. Good job. Are you sure you havent already been taking pucks to the head ? Time will tell. At the very least, it isn't a bad thing to carry the hope that one day.. somehow.. two people can think back on the relationship, forgive hurts and cherish forever, all the good memories. Stay positive man.
  3. Jjasonn28
    I cant tell you how much he has helped!! You want unconditional love at its purest??? Get a dog!! Its all he knows.. all he does is love. Oh and poop. LOL!!!
  4. Jjasonn28
    Absolutely I do. Almost every day since the break up. Even if for only 30 seconds. I will admit, that I have a hard time still dealing with the fact that It strikes me at any time, anywhere with no warning. But I have also realized that just letting it out is the best way to ease the pain. Even today. I had a great day. Spent time with friends and family, enjoying the weather... but there was a few minutes, when I was alone with our dog. He had a sad look on his face. I just gave him a hug, and with a few tears told him, 'i know... i miss her too.'
  5. Jjasonn28
    I went through exactly the same thing once. Broke up with a girlfriend of 2 years. Felt bad for about 3 months, then met somebody else unexpectedly. The moment I realized the new girls was in to me, was the moment I too put the last relationship 'to rest'. Word of caution though. The new girl and the relationship we had turned out to be merely a rebound. I was younger then, perhaps a lot immature to the nature of relationships. While the 'rebound girl' was a great boost in confidence, it just didn't last because I still had lingering emotions about the ex. Looking back now, It wasn't fair to the new girl, or to myself.
  6. Jjasonn28
    Hey man Good job keeping yourself together. She definitely does sound like she needs to figure some stuff out. Giving her space and time and not playing into any emotional head games should give her opportunity to make sense of things. Stay strong my friend. Keep your head up. She may have made a terrible mistake by pushing you away, but she will realize this at some point. Nobody can say when, but only she can bring that revalation upon herself. Nothing you or anybody will say or do can make her understand that. Continue being you. And find something to improve on. Be it a personal trait, or a skill. Hang in there.
  7. Jjasonn28
    My ex girlfriend is very attractive as well. But knowing that she loved me was enough. Trust and self esteem are huge issues here. Now Im not the greatest looking guy by any means, but I am happy with myself. Couple that with trust and true respect for my partner.. and there is no need to be jealous. I would infact get a kick out of the different stories she would share about some guy trying to pick her up. Id just think to myself, "yup! my girl's a hottie!" And in a small way, It would reafirm my appreciation for her.
  8. Jjasonn28
    Hi there. I have to disagree a little with the above posts. In the lifespan of a relationship, there will be tension, and stress. Are we to take a break from the person whom we love every time a tough situation arises? I dont think so. Its my belief, that these bumps, roadblocks - whatever you want to call them - are just obstacles. Dealing with them positively, constructively is the only way in my opinion to build stronger foundations and bridges. I would approach her with utter honesty. You two need to be open with eachother. That is, of course, if both of you are happy with what you have. The on thing that stands out in your post however is this, Did your relationship have an expected expiry date? I dont think it is as easy as that. If you are starting to go through the stages of grief, then she obviously means more to you.
  9. Jjasonn28
    You are right. At this point, you cannot offer anything more than a friendship, as your heart is still wrapped up with feelings of your ex. Wether or not she can or wants to offer friendship or more doesn't matter. If you think that talking with her might help you to sort out some feelings, and generaly be a positive outlet for you, then you should talk to her. Right now, its about you. That being said, if you think it would be more awkward than anything, then dont. You have the answer. As for the 'other girl' in my thread, I again made it clear that I am in no way shape or form capable of giving anything beyond a frienship. She has slowed down her attempts to 'sway' me into spending more time with her. She has however, again become interested in my struggle with the emotional rollercoaster. She is back to being a friend again. Its still a little tainted, and I am very cautious about what I say to her.. but none the less having that extra person to talk to.. helps. Take care man.
  10. Jjasonn28
    I can speak from experience, that sharing these feelings and becoming 'friendzoned' with a girl, doesn't necessarily mean that nothing further can happen... I opened up to this girl only with intentions of friendship, and now she is very interested in me. I guess the difference is, in my case, I dont want anything past a friendship with her. Wether you want a friendship, or more just express yourself the way you are comfortable. The way YOU want. If you want to talk about this stuff with her, DO IT. If you dont, then DONT. Just do what you feel is right. Be yourself.
  11. Jjasonn28
    Any specific Genre of music you are looking for?
  12. Jjasonn28
    If you want to get back together, then you need to tell her that. But only once. If she doesn't want to get back with you, then you need to tell her what you do in your time is no longer her business. Take some time away from her, and she will miss you. If that phonecall from that girl was in innocense, then you have nothing to apologize for. If she can't handle that, or trust you, then she has issues, and I suggest you re evaluate wether getting back together is worth it. Good luck
  13. Jjasonn28
    Do you want to get back together? If it was a mutual break up, then it shouldn't matter who is calling you now. But by the way she is acting, I would say that she is having second thoughts on breaking up. If you want to be back together with her, then you two really need to talk about it. If not, you need to let her think what she wants, and continue to live your life. You are young man. If this stuff bothers you, just walk away from it. You have PLENTY of time to meet more women, and experience all the relationship woes
  14. Jjasonn28
    Who ended the relationship?
  15. Jjasonn28
    Personal preference... I would have to say I like the 'sweater and jeans' look. But it really doesn't make a difference. So long as she is comfortable in what she wears, its all good.
  16. Jjasonn28
    Hey there. I know exactly how you are feeling, and I can only say that -in time- it will get better. One day you will realize that you have SO MUCH to offer, and that there are many people who will appreciate you the way you deserve. When we are rejected, we are bound to feel down about our self worth. We base our self esteem on that rejection, and it tears us up. As each day passes, I am feeling better about myself again.. albeit very small steps. You are a very attractive woman. (With a gorgeous smile). In time, you will realize that its HIS LOSS. Keep your chin up, and keep smiling. JP
  17. Jjasonn28
    Hey. Yeah, I have thought about this. I think about it every day. In the past, I have gone NC to heal after a break up. I realize that it is going to take me longer to get over her, and I most likely will have way more set backs because of the way we are currently handling things. But this situation is a little different. There is no anger or hard feelings between us. We still care very much for eachother, and we have been best friends for 4 years. So for now, we have limited contact. Basically, she calls me once or twice a week. We haven't seen eachother in nearly two months. We will be seeing eachother after her exams at some point. (I am now taking care of our dog, whom we raised together.) So I'll chug along, until one of two things happen. 1. Time will heal me enough that I'll love her only as my best friend. or, 2. I will become so emotionally drained, and exhausted that I'll be left with no other choice but to say goodbye forever. The latter scares me, and I believe I am strong enough to weather this storm. Just so Im clear on things, I am not trying to 'win' her back. I have not nor do I ever plan to ask for her back. If at some point in the future, she has a desire to start over, then I'll deal with it then. But for now, Im just trying to keep my best friend, and stay sane in the process. I do question her intentions some times, and still believe that our love is deeper than what has transpired, but I keep that to myself.. well, and everone here at Enotalone She thinks we should be honest, and say whats on our mind, but I've held back. She knows the obvioius, nothing more. That I am sad, that I do miss her, that Im trying to move on.. Thanks for your words of caution. I Am doing the best that I know how, for the moment.
  18. Jjasonn28
    Thank you everyone for your responses. I guess, as I am prone to do, I am just over analyzing everything I am feeling. And its only because I want to understand it. Im finding it hard to just ACCEPT that this is normal, becuase it hurts so much. But I am happy to say that I had a somewhat better day than expected. It started out looking bad. I was angry, then sad... then very sad. But a friend called and asked if I wanted to hang out for a few hours, so I forced myself out. We talked a little bit about her, and that suprisingly enough made me feel a little better. It really is sad, because most everyone who knows us, adores us both. I had a phonecall from another friend I havent seen or spoken to in a couple years to inquire as to what happen, and to send her wishes on to both of us. Im no longer angry. I think it was because I had exhausted every other emotion that anger was all I had left. But I am not mad. How can I be. She respects me, cares so much for me, and has played a positive role in my life. I never want to place blame, point fingers or hold resentment towards her or our time together. Im hoping that these little bouts of anger are all that I will go through in regards to that step of the process. Thanks again, everyone, for talking me through a tough weekend. Regards, JP
  19. Jjasonn28
  20. Jjasonn28
    Jman311. I am a goaltender. Yup, nothing like taking your mind off of things by having pucks shot at you An effective distraction
  21. Jjasonn28
    Hello everyone. Wow am I ever a mess this weekend. Friday, I was feeling good. Things seemed to be looking up. Saturday, the sun dropped from the sky, and I was overwhelmed with a sadness that I just could not shake. And so far today, I am having these feelings of anger and frustration. I realize there are different stages during the grieving process. But going from one extreme to the other in such a short period of time has really taken its toll on me. I am so drained, yet I cannot manage to fall asleep. I understand that this is completely normal. But its not really something one can prepare for. I cant find anything in particular thats triggering these mood swings, but I guess some can argue that Im not distracting myself enough.. And about feeling frustrated, and angry... this scares me a little. I am starting to have these thoughts that I immediately feel guilty for. Thoughts about how she let me down, that she hurt me, and I SHOULD be angry about it. But as much as I hurt, I know she would never intentionally do that to me... so why am I getting angry?? I think the worst possible outtome of our situation, is that we look back with regret and especially anger. I dont want to taint good memories with unresolved residual anger, especially when there is no good reason to do so. Is having these feelings of anger really normal? Or is there something deeper that I have yet to find, that would yield just cause? JP
  22. Jjasonn28
    Hey Metal, This is great news. I am uplifted when I hear storys such as yours. You will no doubt have an extra spring in your step. Its great that you guys have ironed out the issues, and have made productive descisions towards making it work. Good luck in the future.
  23. Jjasonn28
    WHY? Its 4:50 am, and I cannot sleep. Ive been tossing and turning for the last 3 hours, and crying steadily. Whats wrong with me? I had such a good week... but I cant control myself tonight. I cant think of anything that caused this either. I had a good day yesterday. Got my hair cut, feeling better about myself, played GREAT at hockey... But when I got into bed, I for some reason couldn't get out of my head how much I miss her. I have a headache now, but the tears have slowed down. I was tempted to call her, as she did me a few times in the a.m when she was hurting, but thought better of it. I dont know how much more of this I can take. I would do absolutely anything for her, and its killing me.
  24. Jjasonn28
    Hey bud. Every day is tough. I know. I especially know how it feels to be around others and have them talking about their 'significant others'. Its hard to enjoy yourself when your constantly reminded of how miserable you are. The only advice I can offer, is don't fight it. Let yourself feel sad. Don't try to pretend that it isn't there. In my case, when I tryed to conceal the hurt, it only ended up hurting even more when it caught up with me. Everyone is different in the way they deal with this stuff though. Hang in there man. It takes time, but it will slowely start to get better.
  25. Jjasonn28
    If any movements are being made towards getting back together, then they are unintentional. If anything, we are standing still, not moving forward, nor making constructive attempts to reconcile. This girl is a good friend.. but she likes me. I have made it perfectly clear that Im still in love with my ex, and that I dont want anything more. And she still offers her friendship and understanding. But theres that small part of me that feels that she is herself, holding on to hope.
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