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Unmotivated

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  1. Unmotivated
    Hey Wondercookie and FoxLocke, just wanted to thank you guys for sharing your advice/experiences. Your posts were very inspirational.
  2. Unmotivated
    I think that you have a right to be angry at him. Seat belt or no seat belt, his reckless driving put both of your lives in danger. By getting behind the wheel, he took upon himselve the responsibility of your well-being... and he blundered. Everybody messes up sometimes. Most everybody takes a gamble once in a while, when they know they shouldn't. He did wrong and as a result, you we're injured. Do you think that your boyfriend is earnestly sorry for what he did? How did he react when you told him how you felt towards him? It sounds like right now this whole event has been tearing your relationship apart. Maybe the two of you can turn that around. If your boyfriend really cares about you and is sincerely sorry for what he did, he should be there for you as you recover. If you two can remain close and get through the ordeal together, I think you'll come out on the other side with a stronger relationship than before. You boyfriend has probably said sorry a million times, but I think that you can judge more by his actions and base your feelings towards him on that. He can't change what he did, but he can decide what to do today. If you can't forgive the man that caused the horrible accident, then try to forgive the man that is by your side as you recover.
  3. Unmotivated
    Did something happen that resulted in her parents making this decision? Maybe they don't feel comfortable with the idea of you and their daughter being together at night. You could try to let them get to know you better and perhaps build up some trust. Alternatively, as soon as your girlfriend turns 18, she can legally do whatever she wants, but I think it would be better to gain her parent's approval of the situation than to pull out the big guns and go around them entirely. Some people refuse to change, but I think most people will be reasonable if you can figure out how to relate to them. Good luck.
  4. Unmotivated
    I can definitely relate here. I like how I look in the mirror, but I can almost never take a picture of myself that I like. It's mind-boggling.
  5. Unmotivated
    From your posts I get the impression that you are intelligent and have a very active mind. I have the same problem, though I don't claim to be particularly intelligent. Anyway, I think you're getting ahead of yourself. You said that you've never really had any conversations with your teacher. I think she might be a bit surprised if you showed up at her house and tried to tell her about your feelings. I think that it's a good idea to get her email and, through that avenue, explain how much your respect her and the experiences she has had and ask her if she would be willing to give you some advice. If you get a positive response, maybe you could ask to meet her in person somewhere to discuss stuff. Remember this though: Always take your current thoughts with a grain of salt. I have bipolar disorder and I am often times not thinking straight. I have learned to be careful of the decisions I make when I am depressed or manic. This woman isn't perfect. Sure, she has a great deal of worldly experience, but don't make the mistake of believing that she will be able to solve all of your problems, because that may lead to great disappointment. Good luck, sir. I hope this helped.
  6. Unmotivated
    Thanks for the replies and advice. After the session we scheduled another appointment for next week. Now that I think about it, maybe it wasn't a good idea...
  7. Unmotivated
    I went to talk to a thearapist today regarding the problems I've been having in life with work and depression. She was a nice young woman, probably a 3-4 older than me. The session lasted an hour, and during that time she happen to ask me if I was dating anyone, and I explained that I had never dated. Anyway, it was nice to talk to someone about my problems, but when I got home, I realized that I felt attracted to the therapist, not really because she had asked me about dating, but I guess just because of the connection resulting from me telling her all of my problems and having her listen to me. Of course she isn't attracted to me. Of course there's nothing really there and nothing is going to happen, but I can't seem to control such feelings. It frustrates me because this happens a lot and it is essentially pointless or even harmful. Why is it that when any female that gets remotely (and innocently) close to me, I automatically seem to gain this emotional attachment to them?
  8. Unmotivated
    Maybe you could try to get in touch with managment and discuss the issue with them, although it may lead to further awkwardness if your boss gets approached by someone about it.
  9. Unmotivated
    I find small breasts to be very attractive. Very large breasts are a turn-off for me, and implants are a very, very big turn-off. I mean, maybe I'm just weird, but I'm far more attracted to girls that have almost no breasts at all than girls that have breasts that seem even slightly too large for their body. Of course, not everyone is like me, but I think that any guy that isn't happy with your natural body is not worth your time.
  10. Unmotivated
    I agree with aggierocker. You just need to practice your social skills. Start with something easy, talk strangers that you see pass when your walking around town. Just a simple "Hi." or "Hey, how's it going?". After you get comfortable with this, practice some short conversations with people. For instance, if you're in some sort of public building, you could walk up to somebody and ask them if they know where to find this or that, or you could just comment on something that's happening, like the weather or how ridiculous it is that you and this person have to wait in a really long line for something. The good thing about practicing like this is that you probably won't see these people again (unless you live in a really small town) and even if you do, they probably won't remember you or they will remember you and how friendly you were. As for talking to people you meet somewhere that you'll probably see again, i.e. a party or at class or work, just be confident. The easiest way to do this is just to be yourself. If anybody has a problem with who you are, it's their problem, not yours. Don't worry about people judging you by the way you look or what you say. The problem is that people will judge you by how confident you are around them. If you just sit around in the corner, they won't really think much of you and they might even make some unfair assumptions about you. If you go around a party and introduce yourself to everyone, shake hands, and smile, I doubt anybody's going to care about whether or not you have a job. Good luck! And if nothing else, look forward to college. It's a great place to pratice your social skills!
  11. Unmotivated
    I have OCD. When I was in High School it was pretty bad. My biggest thing was obsession with germs and contamination, and thus a great deal of hand-washing. Since I've been to college it has diminished a great deal. Today I don't consider it to be too much of a problem. I don't know if this will work for you, but it's something to try at least: Next time you get the urge to do something, to put something in order or whatever, try to resist it. Tell yourself that there's no reason and it will be okay if you just leave it. If you can keep yourself from acting on the urge, then congratulate yourself. Be happy that you have control. This worked for me fairly well. Whenever I would feel the obsessions, I would put my foot down and say no. Little by little, the urges died down. It made me more confident to see results and realize that I had control over the matter. I hope this helps!
  12. Unmotivated
    I think my best advice for you if you are going to have to live with your parents for a while is this: Try to respect your parents. Try to understand where they're coming from on an issue even if it doesn't make any sense to you or seems downright wrong. My situation is a bit ironic, actually. I moved out five years ago and I changed a great deal and became immersed in the "culture" of my friends. The funny thing is, I've now started to bounce back on certain issues, going back to what my parents believe or how they live their lives, and I have realized that much of what I hated about them or disagreed with them on when I was growing up now makes much more sense to me. For instance, for the longest time (probably since my early teens), I have been a major computer geek. I would just get completely obsessed with computer games and that's all that I would do. My dad was always against me sitting around and playing games all day, but back then I just attributed it to the fact that he was much older than me and couldn't understand the computer culture. Now I realize that that lifestyle has heavy consequences and that it's much more important to me to maintain a healthy body and go out and meet people and enjoy the real world. My dad was right, all along. Also, I would encourage you to demand a little bit of respect from your parents. Let them know that you understand their point of view and then tell them why you hold your point of view. Of course it probably won't change their opinion on the matter, but I think it would really improve your relationship if you and your parents felt comfortable talking about why you guys don't agree on certain things. Good luck.
  13. Unmotivated
    I had a similiar relationship with my parents, although not so extreme. When I was growing up, my parents taught me not to swear. I remember my dad getting kind of upset when I said, "Crap." one time. This was in High School. Since I've moved to college, I've developed a vocabulary amoung my roommates that would surely make my parents' jaws drop if they ever overheard us. A couple years back, my parents came to visit our apartment and I slipped. I was commenting on the messy state of our kitchen and I said something along the lines of, "Yeah, there's **** [starts with an 's', synonym for poop] everywhere." She seemed a little taken aback, but was upset or anything. Since then, I think I might of slipped a couple times. They seem to have accepted it, along with all the other ways I've chosen to live my life that contradict how they taught me. So I guess my advice is to begin to show them the "real you", little by little, and hope that they are willing to accept who you really are. As for your feeling that everything feels wrong and foreign, I think that will all change if you move out (I gather that you're living with your parents). Whether you go to college or just go somewhere else to live on your own, you'll immerse in other people and they will, in a sense, "raise" you again. After a few years this life will begin to feel normal and you'll begin to fit into it comfortably. Hopefully at this point your parents will be able to understand that you are different than them in many ways and will be willing to accept that.
  14. Unmotivated
    It sounds like the stress caused by his parents splitting up has caused him to distance himself from you and have some unusual behavior. I think you need to give him the space he needs while he finds a way through his situation. If you can get him to talk to you, let him know that you don't want to break up and that you understand if he needs to go out with his friends or have time by himself. Tell him that you love him and that you're still here for him. If he feels the need to remain distant, at least you will be on good terms with him. After he gets through his problems, hopefully he will realize what you mean to him and appreciate the support you offered him through the ordeal.
  15. Unmotivated
    So true. Good luck man!
  16. Unmotivated
    From time to time I stutter on my sentences or have a sort of mental block and cannot for the life of me remember a word or name that would normally be recalled instantly. The odd thing is that this happens most often and most extremely around my roommates, whom I have known for over eight years. When I'm talking in public or to strangers, it's generally a great deal easier for me to speak clearly. Has anyone heard of problems like this or have any suggestions for me? Thanks!
  17. Unmotivated
    Thanks for the reply. Hopefully I'll be able to muster up the courage to just ask her. But until then the problem is the waiting. It's the waiting that gets to me. I need to distract myself so I'm not constantly thinking about the situation. And even when I'm not thinking about it directly, I still have that feeling in my chest--the hope and inspiration and anticipation. It's going to be a long week.
  18. Unmotivated
    I'll try to keep this short =) Basically, there's a very pretty girl in on of my art classes. Today, I passed her while heading to class and she looked at me and gave a little smile. Later, during class I caught her looking at me a few times. Most of the class left and a few us stayed to work on projects, including her and I. I finally worked up the ambition to talk to her, I just asked her how she was doing on her project. We were in there for about an hour and we talked to each other a few more times, always about our projects or about the machinery (it's kind of a wood-working class). Anyway, when she left she smiled and said, "Cya." and I said likewise. It's only a one-day-a-week class and next week the professor said there won't officially be class, but we can come in and work on stuff if we want. This girl is very pretty and I definitely get the impression that she's interested in me. She seems kind of insecure about her appearance, but I don't see why. She's also a little bit shy, but not as shy as some people I know. Anyways, the point is that I probably won't see her too many more times in the semester. I'm probably going to show up next week just to see if she's there. After that there's one regular class period left and then it's exam week. I might only have one chance to talk to her again, and I don't want to screw it up. Should I ask her on a date or for her number or something like that or should I just try to talk to her more and get to know her better? A lot of times I get the impression that a girl is interested in me, but I screw it up by not making a move. Also, there's the little voice in the back of my head that always reminds me that the whole thing might just be my imagination and maybe she's not at all interested in me. I appreciate any advise.
  19. Unmotivated
    EDIT: I feel better now and I don't like the thought of this vile post still existing. Thank you for the replies.
  20. Unmotivated
    Though I don't believe in an afterlife personally, I do know that various religions believe that people who commit suicide are punished in the afterlife.
  21. Unmotivated
    In my experience, romantic dreams aren't all that great either. I mean, sure, they're wonderful while I'm dreaming, but when I wake up I just realize that it was all fake and I feel empty and depressed, though sometimes temporarily inspired to find someone... I really wouldn't about have lust-filled dreams though. I mean, dreams most often contain our most basic of emotions, lust being among those. I can't speak for everyone, but I know I've had some really screwed up dreams in that department that I don't really care to tell people about.
  22. Unmotivated
    Maybe it's the name of her roommate's boyfriend?
  23. Unmotivated
    True. I think that's why groups like this forum are very useful to people. It allows us to lay out everything we know about a situation and let other people respond to it.
  24. Unmotivated
    You and I are very much alike, John25. Both of us like to sort of situations logically and try to look at all the evidence. Unfortunately, I can't give you a whole lot of advice for you problem. It sounds like a rather delicate situation. The fact that you've gone "out" with her outside of work is a good sign. I think your best bet would be to work from that angle. Maybe you could ask her to go see a movie with you or something along those lines. The thing is... It's hard not to be selfish though in situations like this. Her boyfriend probably isn't a prick or anything. He could be a pretty cool guy. It's always easy to automatically wish that something will come up between a couple so they will break up, but it's really a shortsighted way of looking at things. Irrational thought seems to go hand-in-hand with love. But anyway, I think you should pursues your interests here. Maybe it would be best if you could get her to honestly talk about her relationship with her boyfriend or something like that. Good luck, man! ----- This is why they need cloning. There are so many great people out there that are already spoken for. We just need about a dozen of each of them.
  25. Unmotivated
    It sounds like you already let him know that you are interested by asking him what time he gets off. I think you try to go to the club on a night that's not too busy and try to talk to him some more. And don't bring your friend this time unless you don't feel comfortable going alone. I get that a lot--I'm out somewhere with my friends and I see someone I'm sort of attracted to and maybe we get some eye contact going on, but my friends don't notice any of it and I'm too secretive about such things to let them on it. I think that's one of the great things about flirting... It's such a strong connection between two people and yet it's so subtle. The world continues on normally while a couple of strangers game of confusion, hope, possibilities, excitement.... So... Yeah. Sorry I kind of started rambling there. Again, I would say go for it.
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