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MsMe

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Everything posted by MsMe

  1. MsMe
    First, I would say that she needs to find another therapist to deal with her exhibitionism. My fear is that she is going to show too much at the wrong time and get herself into trouble. It's one thing to face your fears, something totally different to parade about completely naked in front of a family. Regardless of what her body looks like, her behavior is inappropriate and needs to be addressed. Preferrably by an objective, professional person who can help her balance what she's going through.
  2. MsMe
    I should have been more clear. She should go to the doctor but when SHE decides to go. She is not obligated to go because her mom made the appointment. At the same time, she should find her own doctor-one she is comfortable with so these issues with her mom are not a factor.
  3. MsMe
    Here's an idea. If you're really that uncomfortable with going to the gyno, cancel the appointment. Your mom can't make you go if you don't want to. The choice is yours- not hers.
  4. MsMe
    It sounds to me as if she's interested. The only thing that is a "red flag" in my mind is the amount of time she spends talking with you. Even when your co-worker says (jokingly) "Leave him alone", could it be her constant talking is bothering them? Talking approximately 2 hours a day at work is a bit excessive. I have co-workers that I speak to. I try to keep the conversations down to about 10 minutes and I don't talk to them every day. I would suggest gently but firmly setting some boundaries with her just incase upper management takes notice.
  5. MsMe
    Ok..this is a strange question but I had to ask. I was talking to this guy who seems to be flirting with me for sometime. Anyway, towards the end of our conversation he bends his elbow with his forearm straight up and with his other hand he's stroking his forearm up and down with a clenched fist. Honestly, it looked phallic to me. I don't know if it was a suggestive gesture or if he was subconsciously telling me to blank off. He was making dead eye contact with me as he was doing it. Not sure if he was trying to send a good message, bad one or nothing at all.
  6. MsMe
    I think a crush is liking the person physically, wanting to be around them and just feeling good spending time with them. At the same time you hope for at least some level of attraction. It might go somewhere, it might not, but overall there is a feeling of attraction and a "feel good" kind of feeling.
  7. MsMe
    There are some people who have an intoxicating effect on us. It could give us the most incredible high. But when something goes wrong, we go crashing back down to earth. It's good that you recognize that its becoming exhausting. You know that mentally its gone too far. What I would do is start to slowly take control back. It's ok to think of him "sometimes", but not all the time. Make those "sometimes" less and less frequent. Get into other activities and focus on things that you like to do. There are a lot of other people and things besides this one person. Try to explore them, you might be pleasantly surprised !
  8. MsMe
    Ok, I'm looking for some imput to help settle a debate. I'm very friendly with my coworker and we've been talking quite steadily recently (about 20 minutes or so each week). Anyway, he's having some problems with finances and he's told me about it. I've given him some hints that I've found helpful and we talk about money and our bonuses/comissions etc. I've showed him some of my financial statements and he's shown me his bonus report. Here, the problem. My friend says we're getting too close and it isn't appropriate to disclose so much information. We've been talking for about eight months now and I just see it as giving advice and learning from each other. He has told me that he's taken my advice on streamlining his household expenses. What I really want to know is how close is too close?
  9. MsMe
    I don't know if I'm posting this in the right area. I'm just looking for ideas or reasons behind a person's behavior. In conversation, I notice that a guy I speak to frequently has started to mimmic my style of speaking and voice inflections. This usually happens when its a serious conversation. He also imitates my body language. Should I find this insulting or flattering? The problem is that I no longer feel as if I'm speaking to an individual. I feel like I'm speaking to a mirror image of myself. Anyone encounter something similiar?
  10. MsMe
    I completely agree. If you can contact him with an open mind, then fine. If you're looking for something in particular from him and your emotions are too high, then don't.
  11. MsMe
    I agree that she should be punished in some way. I wouldn't say jail time, but at least a fine of some sort. She should also be required to get counseling. It's hard to say. She lied to the police, gave a description of kidnapers that didn't exist. This story could have been more messy than it was if two innocent people were taken in for questioning. Maybe jail should be in order. It's difficult to decide.
  12. MsMe
    No Terry Schiavo, No Pope John Paul II, they needed to grab onto something.
  13. MsMe
    I've been to a lot of big weddings but 14 bridesmaids and groomsmen?! That is crazy ! Did Lady Di have that many in 1981? Anyway, she did not handle this in a mature, rational manner. I can't understand a grown woman saying "I didn't think it would turn into this" or something to that effect. She put her parents through agony and I agree she needs counseling. I feel badly for the fiance who was suspected of murder. This will take a long time to sort out and a longer time to come to terms with.
  14. MsMe
    Could it be he has a hearing impairment?
  15. MsMe
    I think NC is one of the hardest things to do. After all, it was a negative experience that brought you to this point (most likely) and now you have to fight a very strong urge to start over. It's a constant mental and emotional tug of war. At least for me, NC was a lot of trail and error. If I failed, I tried not to beat myself up over it. That would accomplish nothing. I try to tell myself that if I did the best I could and acted reasonably and appropriately, then I had no reason to doubt myself after that. If the person hurt me intentionally, then I had to factor that in and question if I would allow myself to let that happen again. At the same time, I separated what I could and could not control. NC is hard, but at times its necessary. Here's a tip: think of what your life was like before that person entered it. Think of the good times you had and ask yourself the old question. Am I better off with or without him/her? I wish you all the best.
  16. MsMe
    Need more details...how did you know him? What kind of conversations did you have with him prior?
  17. MsMe
    What I really want(ed) was to include him in our social circle. I've never been in a situation where someone I was friendly with "cut off" or did not acknowledge my spouse. I came here to get feedback from the forum and I appreciate all responses. I should have clarified in my posts that I am not nor have I ever been attracted to him.
  18. MsMe
    Thanks so much for all your replies. Here is an update: My co-worker and I still talk, but not as often. When he does see my husband when we meet for lunch, my husband attempts to greet him, but my co-worker turns away. When I told my worker friend I was going to a party over the weekend, he wanted to know if I was going with my husband (I don't know how that makes a difference). I told him "yes" and he pretty much avoided the topic of him. It's getting difficult speaking with someone and deliberately avoiding speaking of your spouse. Sometimes I can't help but take it personally that I have done something wrong. Well, that's the update. Thanks for reading.
  19. MsMe
    I do believe that we meet people in our lifetime that have an intoxicating effect on us. A one minute encounter with them can give an incredible emotional high. I think its good to recognize it, in this way we can "temper" it. Nothing wrong with those emotional highs until we live for the next moment to experience them. At that point it becmes all consuming. Enjoy their presense, enjoy speaking with them. Treat it as a treasure (couldn't think of a better word), but don't obsess over the next time. That wouldn't be fun.
  20. MsMe
    I always view NC as taking medicine. It's not pleasant, but more often than not, it helps greatly. You said in your post that she doesn't want to work things out. I don't see a point in contacting her when you know she does not want to get back together. At the same time, you're finding other girls and people to hang out with that prove that there is life after the ex. My advise is continue with the NC and try to enjoy yourself. She doesn't want to get back together, so there is no point emailing her and having contact. NC is hard enough emotionally. I hope it works out for you.
  21. MsMe
    Do you have caller ID? It works wonders. You don't have to answer a call if you know she's on the other end. It saves you the time and trouble of changing your phone number. She sounds like a manipulator who does not stick to her word. Not someone you would want to have a relationship with.
  22. MsMe
    Try to take time out for yourself. Think of positive things and realize that there was life before this person and there will be life after. I agree with other posts, that time heals. Be gentle with yourself and let time do its healing.
  23. MsMe
    I've had "dates from hell". The good thing about them is that you know early on that this person is not right for you. I'm sorry you didn't have a good time.
  24. MsMe
    I agree. Don't read into it too much. You don't want to make yourself crazy. Be gentle with yourself. Sometimes we can be our own worst enemy emotionally.
  25. MsMe
    It's not the first time we've had a lengthy conversation. However, I never thought of it that way at all. I'm fortunate in that I work in a relaxed enviornment. As long as the conversations are not a daily occurrence and the work is completed, it won't be an issue.
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