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So_confused

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  1. So_confused
    So my now ex-girlfriend and I broke up about a month ago and things started going bad about 2 months ago. Before that, things were amazing. I had never met a girl like her before, she told me that she had never felt what she feels for me for anybody before. She told me that she wanted to be with me forever and that before me she had never been able to say I love you and actually mean it. She broke up with me and wanted to be friends but I just couldn't be friends with her at that point. What I really need is to know why we broke up and that reason is something that has been in her head for 2 months now and I don't know if I will ever know. She knows that it would help me understand and that if I just knew why then I could get on with my life but she won't give it to me. She says that she knows we should talk but she's been saying that for 2 months now. I've never had such a hard time getting over a girl before and when I think I am getting over her, I see her or think of her and end up right where I left off. It wasn't even that long of a relationship, just under 5 months but I guess since everthing was so perfect and we made so many good memories I'm having such a hard time. I just don't understand how someone like that knows that you're hurting so much and that they could help you understand but they don't.
  2. So_confused
    Thank you hubman01 for agreeing with me on this one, dfcannon maybe you're forgetting exactly what full_on_chick was asking. I believe her subject was "ne one know about marijuana ???". I was just giving her info on it, so before you fly off the handle at someone please carefully read what they posted. You even said "This man has allowed his new girlfriend to take control of his life and the family." Well now does it sound like the weed is the problem or the new girlfriend? We're all here to ask for help and to give help so instead of bashing other people for trying to help ask yourself what good does it do the author of this post when you go off on others.
  3. So_confused
    I smoke and workout almost everyday. I must admit that I'm not in the same shape as I was before I started smoking but I was a big mass of muscle then and now I'm doing it just for a bit of bulk and definition. We all know that smoking isn't very healthy and that we really shouldn't do it but if you're going to continue to smoke and go to the gym I honestly don't see any huge negative effects on muscle growth. You're cardio will be alot weaker than a non-smoker though.
  4. So_confused
    I did the same thing when I turned 22, it wasn't because I only wanted to think about myself. It was because at that age us guys start to think about marriage and such and that starts to scare us. Do we really want to be with the girl we're with forever? or do we want to go out and have a good time with other girls. It's all about finding out for ourselves what we really want. It might be a little selfish but do you really want your boyfriend in the realationship if he isn't sure about being with you forever?
  5. So_confused
    Alright, I've been smoking it for about 9 years and I can honestly say that it isn't as bad as the government and media make it out to be. Some people say it's a gateway drug and blah blah blah. The reason it's the first drug to be done by most people is because it's the easiest to get your hands on and the safest. In 9 years I've never experienced any bad effects except for the munchies. In the situation that you are in right now I would think that weed has nothing to do with the way your Dad is acting. When he used to take you and your bros places was he with the GF? If not then it sounds like he's just busy with her. We've all started new realationships before and what do you do? You spend all your time with them. I think that maybe he doesn't want any distractions around the house so he shipped you guys else where. It might be weird for him to be getting with a new woman and having your Moms and his kids around. As for the weed, don't worry too much about that. If he's been smoking it for 15 or so years then it's just a way of his life, a way to kick back and relax. It's like having a beer after work.
  6. So_confused
    I want to put my 2cents in here. I was taking Creatine in grade 12 for a while. When I first started taking it I was 160 lbs and after taking it for 4 weeks on 3 weeks off for almost half a year I got to 190lbs. I had stopped taking it a few weeks before I was going to be in an amatuer Strong man Competition so when I was competing I could "load" and kick some butt. Well 4 days after loading 5 times a day I got into a argument with my girl and absolutly snapped turning to a wall and repeatedly punching it only stopping when I saw blood on the wall. Broke my hand and fractured several bones. The one thing I learned from my experience then was that "Loading" was just a little to much for me. It gives you so much energy and makes you a snap case if you can't deal with it. Other than that I've never experienced any bad side effects or unusual things. I used it again about 4 months ago with out loading and everything was fine. As everyone was saying drink alot of water, it's not a joke. The stuff is hard on your kidneys and water will help them out. Your body produces Creatine from meats and when you start to add creatine your body gets tricked into thinking that it doesn't need to produce it anymore so don't stay on it too long. Also, any excess of creatine gets peed out.
  7. So_confused
    Ummmm..... Ya. That's a given. If they've got good hygeine then it's not too much to worry about but if they just ate some rank food then you're going to share it with them. Carry gum or mints.
  8. So_confused
    Well I think you sumed it up yourself "Ugottabejokin", you are weak. You must really care about girl A, just dumping her and going to girl B's house to screw. Wow you must have been real happy with girl A! You're lucky as hell that she took you back. With girl B who cares if the sex was bad because that probably has nothing to do with anything, the fact is that there was no more game for her. She got you to do what she wanted, it was all a challenge in her head. She played you like Nintendo and when she won she went and got a new game. I truly hope that girl A finds out about girl B and dumps your ass. Anyone with so little respect for their significant other doesn't deserve to have one.
  9. So_confused
    After reading your post the first thing that came to my mind was that a couple months ago you met your new best friend and then a couple months ago your boyfriend and you have started fighting. Are these connected in any way? If they are then your boyfriend is probably just jealous about your new friend. Time that used to be for him is now shared with your other guy friend and that would make any guy a little upset. As for taking a break with your boyfriend, if the only reason you want to take a break is so you can give "new friend" a chance then that's not very cool to your boyfriend. How would it feel if the tables were turned? What if he wanted to put you on hold so he could see how things might go with another girl? If you want to be with someone else then you're going to have to be completely honest with your boyfriend and break up with him. He should at least deserve that much respect from you. There was a time that I was in the same situation as you and I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years so I could see what it was like to be with a girl I had gotten really close too and as soon as I was with the other girl I really started to miss my new ex-girlfriend and now I'm with neither. If you do decide to go for "new Friend" then give it some time between the break up to make sure that you really want what you think you want.
  10. So_confused
    Um, using your "reverse psychology" probably screwed you over big time dude, you pretty much told her that you're over her and that she's 100% right that your realationship could never ever work out. You went out with her for 3 years and then a week after you broke up she was dating a new guy? Man, get on with your life. I know it's hard. I've been in the same situation as you before from both ends. Even right now I'm forcing myself to get over my ex that just broke my heart. Sometimes you just need to pick yourself up and dust yourself off. It's by no means an easy thing to do but when you finally can say to yourself that you are an individual and don't need another person to better you or make you feel better about yourself, then the void you are feeling will be gone. One of the hardest things to deal with after a long realationship ends is filling that void, she became such a big part of your life and there was that comfertable routine you guys shared. The world is full of women Jamie, you still sound like you're younger so there's a life time ahead of you. Ask yourself do you really need her? or do you just really miss her? As for what to do now... I'd say move on buddy, you've been dating so it's not like you're having trouble meeting women. Right now you're probably comparing the girls you date to Sherry so it makes it that much harder for you to really like one of them. Go into your dates open minded and not expecting the girl to be a replacement. I don't know what else to say but you're going to be fine man.
  11. So_confused
    Ummmm.... I don't know why the thought that we might not would even cross your mind. If we didn't like doing it we wouldn't and we really like it so we're going to do it. There's nothing better than having full control of a girl with your fingers. Well there's somethings but yeah, we like it.
  12. So_confused
    It's called mutual pleasure. If he's willing to go down on her, then the favor is more than likely to be returned. There are a lot of girls who just don't want to do it though so never expect it to happen. It's almost degrading to some.
  13. So_confused
    Dude she's totally asking for it. She's just told you her parents are out and the house is all hers and she invited you over? Sounds to me like she wants to be a little more then just friends. When you're watching the "movie" if she sits close to you then it's a good sign. A smooth way to get real close is to ask her if she's comfertable and if she says not really make her more comfertable by putting your arm around her. If you can get your arm around her and she doesn't freak out then you'll have no problem kissing her. Enjoy the movie.
  14. So_confused
    When I was in grade 8 I was in the same boat as you are now. My mom found out and got me the proper help needed. Your mom obviously cares a great deal about you or else she wouldn't have asked if you ever thought about hurting yourself. I had to go see a suicide counselor for a while and she made me realize that there was nothing to be afraid of in life. I came to see that life is all about growing up and overcoming the "mountians" that might rise in front of you. Life's a challenge, it's not meant to be easy. If it was, what would be the point in goals and all the great things that come with the future. If you are scared to see the doctor just don't go or pospone it but I think that if the doctor knows what your problems are he will be able to help make them go away.
  15. So_confused
    Girls will be girls and have their little celeb. cuties on their walls or in their heads. You say that your man is the only man that you want and that given the chance you wouldn't give him up to be with any celeb right? Then if you're worried that he might be jealous or something of the pics then take them down. It can't hurt. He might even ask why you took them down and then you can score huge points by telling him that he's the only man that you want in your room.
  16. So_confused
    I just want to say that loving someone and being in love with someone are 2 completely different things. People throw the word Love around alot and before you go tell this boy how you feel think about what you really feel for him. Are you more infactuated with him, think about him alot and get butterflies when you see him or would you be willing to give your life for this person if it came down to it? If you choose to tell him how you feel, do not, I repeat do not use the word Love or else he will get freaked out and run. Tell him that you're really glad you met him and that you would like to do something alone with him if you haven't already.
  17. So_confused
    I know exactly what you're worried about. in my last serious realationship I spent almost everyday of 3 years with my now ex-girlfriend. Seeing each other makes both of you happy right? So keep doing it but be aware that you might lose friends if you're always with her and you will eventually get tired of seeing each other everyday. You might even get too dependant on each other. I know you think it might not happen but it will. Sometimes we just need to be alone for ourselves to grow as an individual or find out who you are, not find out who you are with her. By all means stay with her and enjoy every minute of it but do things with your friends and do things by yourself. Everyday becomes routine.
  18. So_confused
    Not that I'm a female but I've had my tongue peirced for about 4 years now and every girl I've gone down on loved it. You don't go down there and got nuts with it, you go gentle and careful with it. The girls I've been with also liked being kissed with it, just be careful because you don't want to hit their teeth and chip them. Be careful of your teeth too by the way.
  19. So_confused
    I'm with enadevoli here, let her go and maybe she'll see what she's really losing. I must add that with her new friend in the picture things might not look so good. She still want's to be friends because she does still value you but she's not sure if she's doing the right thing. She's probably confused because this new guy shows up in her life and he's the new mysterious boy and you're the old comfertable one and she doesn't know what she wants. Let go and see what happens.
  20. So_confused
    I'm sorry enadevoli but age gap realationships don't work as well as we would like them to. Why? because the older person tends to be more mature and can't handle the youngers immatureness. At first everythings cool, you're both really into each other, but then the younger gets all clingy and it really gets on the olders nerves. If they are both on the same level of maturity then there's more hope of it working but chances are if the younger one is not legal yet and the older one is then when the older wants to go out for drinks etc. the younger is going to question what goes on when the older is out. My views are all from experiences I've had. I won't deny that there is a 18 year difference between my parents and everything is fine there but it's completely different when you hit about an age of about 23-27 and you're finished your partying and you can look in the same direction as your other. smiley_turtle, what ages are we talking about?
  21. So_confused
    Let me be the one to say NEVER DATE ANYONE YOU WORK WITH! I've had a horrible experience with that. First things are fun, you sneak off and find places to kiss and you know and then when there is any problem it will mess up your whole job. Other workers will side with her and other workers will side with you. Not fun at all. I actually ended up quiting my job where I was in management because after I broke up with the girl I was dating from work she made my job a living hell. Everyday I worked with her I dreaded because it would be a nightmare. We couldn't look at each other, I couldn't ask her to do anything because it meant I would have to talk to her, I couldn't even tell her to go on her breaks. I had to get other people to arrange her breaks. I say stay away from this girl, for one she's seeing someone else (who you also work with) and two if you value your job at all don't screw it up for some girl. Just my 2 cents.
  22. So_confused
    Buddafly, there is nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to your body. So many girls have this image of what the perfect body is and that tends to be the body of a famous person / model. Most of these people are plastic or have undergone other methods of surgery. If your boyfriend is still with you and respects you then when he sees you naked he's going to see the perfect body because he loves you and everything about you. As for the first time thing it can be a scary thought but just tell him to go slow and if he knows that it's your first time then he will respect that and be gentle. If it doesn't feel right or there is pain just tell him. There's nothing to worry about. You love him, he loves you.
  23. So_confused
    Forget about her man, she's just going back to what used to be comfertable. If things don't work out between new guy and her don't just go back to her, wait a while and see if she jumps to another guy. if she does then she probably just needs a man in her life. Plus if you take her back right away she's just going to walk all over you. She'll see that she can get whatever she wants from you. Things might have not gone good with her and her new man the day you guys hung out so it got her thinking about you again. If it's been a week since you sent her the flowers and she hasn't called then she's not worth it man. Care for yourself, don't let yourself fall apart because yoyur ex messed with your mind. You were doing fine before you relapsed so you can get back to that. Hope you figure it out buddy, keep in mind that you're better that that.
  24. So_confused

    I.

    So_confused replied to a topic in Breaking Up Advice

    I'm not going to say "move on" but if she's already had 2 rebounds in 2 weeks? Buddy she's probably changed from when you first got together. I know it hurts to be the one left and for no valid reason, you keep asking what did I do? Why did this happen? One big thing I was wondering when I read your post was how old are the two of you? If she's acting like this then she sounds like she's pretty immature and doesn't have much self respect if she's going to just throw herself at other guys. If you were to take her back then she's going to walk all over you, she's got away with it once and you took her back so in her mind she can get away with it again. You don't need to "move on" but you definitly can move up, be the strong, mature one about your break up. It hurts I know, I've been dumped a few times too but the pain does stop and you have a life time ahead of you, don't fret on the past but look to the future.
  25. So_confused
    Let me be the first to tell you that if you've never done it before don't think your going to be as good as they are in the porn movies. Most of the stuff in porn is fake so don't get your hopes up. Go slow and watch her body actions, if she likes it and it feels good her breathing might change, listen for moans and if your having trouble finding the right spots ask her to show you where they are. 2 main spots to target are the clit and the "G" spot. The clit is at the top just inside the lips. you'll feel a small bump when you find it. Roll your finger tip(s) over it lightly in a circuler motion. Don't push to hard though, some girls are sensitive there. The "G" spot is inside about 1" up on her front side, you'll feel a slightly rough area and that's it. Just massage that area, find out what she likes and how she likes you to touch it. As for oral sex, make sure you're ready for it, I know some guys who have been fully turned off oral after doing it to the wrong girl. Don't try to stimulate too many things at once, you're not a pro....... yet. Have fun, be smart, don't rush her.
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