Jump to content

sisterlynch

Members
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    2,115

  • Joined

 Content Type 

Everything posted by sisterlynch

  1. sisterlynch
    I think that in the first year of marriage that we all go thru something equivalent to buyer's regret. That feeling like we should return the thing that we have purchased or trade it in for another item, that is less expensive maybe? Unfortunately for him, he got caught looking, probably something that he does every day, but doesn't get caught. I would ask him lots of questions related to the business trip that he is attending, he may have felt guilty about the trip, and he got caught "unintentionally" looking at some chick's body parts on purpose. It is called subintentional, he wanted to be caught, but he pretended that he didn't care, that is why he can't apologize for now. It is his male ego, getting him introuble and not letting him think logically about the situation. Here is a study to back up my opinion: men were shown pictures of beautiful women, then asked simple questions like would you prefer a dollar today or ten dollars in a week...they failed the questions when they were confronted with a picture of a beautiful woman, so go figure. If you are to be married, you will continue to deal with this until he is able to speak to you directly about it.
  2. sisterlynch
    When you blame someone for a problem that they are not recognizing as a problem then you really do more harm than good.
  3. sisterlynch
    The more that I think about it, in most cases it is ill advised to tell people exactly how you are feeling, unless you know that you can trust someone. We usually have one person in this world that we can trust and know that that person is always there for you. If you feel that you have more than one person that you can trust, then you are very lucky. I still feel that it is ill advised for women to go after the men that are already taken, it is really just a hunting expediction and men are supposed to be the ones that do that, no?? If you get the guy from another girl, then you have a shollow prize, and you have made a life-long enemy. So are you not better off sticking with what you have. Search your feelings for this other guy, it is really a shallow feeling, isn't it?
  4. sisterlynch
    Maybe you should do "no contact" on her for a while. It is really tough moving forward when you didn't want the break up to begin with, but the quicker you give up on the old feelings with her, the better you will be in the long run. Pm me if you want to talk in more detail. I can cheer you up!!
  5. sisterlynch
    The resume is like a snapshot of your life and work experience. Like the table of contents for a book and the letter is like an introductory sentence in an essay. You need to say just enough to make them want to learn more about you. Normally you will fill in an application when you go for the interview, so bring the contact info with you, but only give it to them when they ask for it. They use all this information to get an idea about you, then they bring you in to see if you fit the mold of what they are seeking.
  6. sisterlynch
    The best thing to do is to see a counselor. Most likely his problems are work related and he is taking out his anger on you. If you see a counselor, the person will help you to sort thru your ideas and see what is really going on with him. Whatever you do, don't blame yourself, and don't believe the abusive statements that he is about to make...That is the worst of the situation, he will say things that may take you several years to get over... Also I would advice against taking medication to deal with the issues. Go to a counselor, you are much better off that way.
  7. sisterlynch
    You will pull thru it. The hardest part is temporary. You will get over the feelings of loss soon.
  8. sisterlynch
    She may be leading him on, and she doesn't even know it. You should stay out of it, in some way, she is manipulating you and probably him too. Be careful, ok??
  9. sisterlynch
    Go to a therapist, they are paid to be simpathetic. Besides, if the marriage is really good, strong and the "same" then you need to do the work to make it more reasonable. This is your life, not mine.
  10. sisterlynch
    That is just how your brain works. It wants to go over the signs of hurt. You must learn to control the mind...it will make you feel out of control if you don't. Go to a therapist, join lots of groups. Do anything that will make you think of the problem less. Exercise is always a good one.
  11. sisterlynch
    I recently discovered Nair, and it works really well. Still you will probably need some help.
  12. sisterlynch
    I know that you want to do something -- I think it is better that she learns to fight her own battles in her own way. I agree that she needs to learn to work with the situation, and not get her feelings involved. What kind of a working environment is she in, anyway? At most offices, they wouldn't let you see him, most likely. She could always lie to the guy and say that you and she are still seeing each other, that may back him up a bit. He probably sees that she has just broken up as a sign that she may be available. She needs to tell him things that make her seem less available. If he is as old as her own dad, then most-likely he has been through this before. Sometimes just telling the guy that she isn't interested is enough. Boundaries, she needs to be professional, and not allow this guy to push her around. There was another story on this websight about a girl that finally slept with the guy and soon after she was fired... I would think that if she talked a lot about her own mom or the guys wife, that might work a bit...mostly she needs to remember that she isn't interested in the guy, and hopefully he will find someone else to pick on.
  13. sisterlynch
    I think that you are feeling put down and searching for answers that are not easily available. What do you want in life? What are some of your hobbies? In the future, you will realize that being popular isn't the most important thing to do, be you.
  14. sisterlynch
    What kind of info are you looking for?
  15. sisterlynch
    I knew that there had to be more going on. Don't be afraid to talk to the parents or your own parents about this sort of thing. It is tough to get it resolved if you are not persistent.
  16. sisterlynch
    You may want to put off talking to an expert while you are in a foreign country. Honestly, who knows what you may find or spend to see a properly trained person. You may do better to find an older person in your social setting that may have seen many things and people and talk to them about how you are feeling. I would assume that a lot of what you are feeling is nervousness that can be atributable to being away from home. I know someone who did that and got quite sick in the process.
  17. sisterlynch
    People may disagree about this, but the way that you present yourself to the world is an act. Pure and simple. If you don't like the results, change your reactions to the events. This may sound wrong, but it will help if you realize that the people around you most likely do not want to make you feel better. We live in a highly competitive society, and you can't go around making others happy all the time, because in essance you are losing your own sense of self when are doing this. Make choices that don't involve her, make your own friends.
  18. sisterlynch
    What are you up to? Cippy, You have a right to your own feelings. You don't have to hurt others, because you have made a mistake. Learn from the mistake, and move on, that is the only thing that you can do...
  19. sisterlynch
    Jealousy is really a self esteem issue. If you feel that his behavior is spiteful, try talking it out honestly in advance of the situation occurring. In essance, by not putting your foot down in some definite way, you are allowing his behavior to continue to bug you. The other thing is that you are kind of being a parent toward him in a way, as well. You need to learn to have ownership over your feelings, if something bothers you, then let him know. If he doesn't respect your feelings, then let him know that he can find another girl to wait for him.
  20. sisterlynch
    She is right, go for the counseling, it will leave you feeling much better in the long run. I think that they say that paranoia is difficult to treat, but go in with an open heart, and tell the person all that may be related to the issues that you are feeling. You can do this and get over it eventually.
  21. sisterlynch
    Do others feel that the police should be notified? Her parents need to protect her. That is a lot of pressure on a young girl. -- I feel that the guy is in need of some help.
  22. sisterlynch
    I am happy that you have shared your story. When we love the wrong person it is never easy to let go of the feelings that you had for the other person. It sounds almost like you are resisting loving your husband completely since the other guy is still in the picture. I don't know if I am reading that right or not. I wish you the best in the future. The hurt will go away eventually. Allow yourself to feel your emotions and dont resist them. They are there for a reason.
  23. sisterlynch
    I learned in some class that I took that it is 60% infidelity rate for men, and 40% for women. Men are more likely to cheat. Women are more likely to end the marriage for the new love.
  24. sisterlynch
    I don't know if someone said this or not, but you have very high standards, and there is nothing wrong with that. The girls your age who have been with so many people are all used up. They don't have your high moral standards. The right girl will come along some day, don't worry. Don't sleep with people just out of lust, you are right to develop a relationship first.
  25. sisterlynch
    I don't think that you should read too much into his feelings. He can be friendly and outgoing, but he may not intentionally be flirting with you. He may be attracted to you, but I would give this one a miss. He isn't the right guy if he would date you while he is seeing someone else, he will make you feel insecure in the long run.
×
×
  • Create New...