Brawnee

True, while I'm not in love with the 20 y.o., I do like her and the potential for falling in love with her is there.....

Okay. Been a while since posting here, and hopefully I can gleen some good advice from the forum. Here's the situation: There are 2 women. The first one is my age (33), from my place in the world and I've spent a fair amount of time with her. I've known her for almost a year. We haven't had sex, but we have been intimate in other ways. She seems so interested in me at times and doesn't want me to leave her whenever we are together, and this is very sweet to me. I get along with her exceptionally. I am convinced that she is in a secret relationship/ in love with with her best friend (who is also a woman). I believe that she is confused, likes me very much, but is afraid of her girlfriend in some way... It's like we are on the cusp of something really great but there seems to be something holding her back from making that first leap into my arms. I have been told by a mutual friend of ours that she "keeps me on a pedestal" and thinks that I am awesome... great. She is sooo slow to come into my arms, and its frustrating to me. (Exaple: we sing and dance, holds hands and tell each other how fortunate we are to have met... When I get that lusty look in my eyes and I go in for the kiss she usually withdraws) I think I am falling in love with her. Then there's the other girl. I've known this girl casually for about 2-3 years. She is 13 years my junior (20) and so very cool and attractive (true long legged hottie). I haven't spent too much time with her and we've never been intimate in any way other than just hangin' out, firin' up a doobie and talking or her cutting my hair. I am about to purchase my first home and she wants to be my roomie. She offered money towards the mortgage and cooking, cleaning and laundry services. It sounds very tempting. I like this girl very much; she seems to be a free spirit with a servant's heart. I am worried because I do not really know her all that well. She's so young and if she moves in with me, it will be her first living away from her parents. I can tell that she is attracted to me, and that there is potential for something good... but potential for something bad also. I could definitely use the help around the house and the company. However, I know that if I did this, it would probably ruin any chance for the other woman whom I am falling for. I need to spend more time with her before I decide to let her live with me. Anyway, I know the post is lengthy but this something that is weighing heavily on my heart and it is difficult to talk to my friends about it because their views are skewed by the simple fact that they know me. I would love to hear any advice from an unbiased stranger. Thanks. Brawnee

I hate to generalize, but most true lesbians- are psychopaths.

If you feel you are getting friend zoned, just make sure to ask another girl out, and let the one you're interested in know... better yet- let her see you with her. Look at her face and you'll know how she truly feels. This has worked like a charm for me in the past.

I find that if I am stressed or nervous, I'll be a minute man. If I am relaxed and mellow I'm every womans fantasy... Stress has a big role to play in this phenomenon, and I'd be willing to bet that many people don't realize this. My ex (woman I was with for 10 years) and I used to experiment with tantric sex. One of the things we did before any touching was meditate and relax. Feel a warm heaviness throughout the body and finally focusing the loosening warmth and heaviness at our centers... It may sound strange, but it worked for me...

I went about 2 weeks one time.

Male- c. One time I indulged an old girlfriend and let her tie me up and blindfold me. She left me there for days......... Just kidding. Actually when she reentered the bedroom, I could barely see out of the corner of the blindfold. She had a riding crop in one hand and a velvet bag in the other. I couldn't stand being laid out and vulnerable like that. I indulged her this one time, and I realized that wasn't for me at all.

The next time you want to call him, do sit ups and push-ups. Go for a walk. Exercise. Write in your journal. Paint a picture. Design your dream house. Feed an animal. Get recipes and plan on cooking your man a wonderful meal-- and then surprise him with it, but don't call and tell him about it. Good grief, it's simple. Any negative behavior can be substituted with a positive one. Do your best, it will gratify some and amaze the rest...

Funny, the woman that I was with for 10 years I met whilst taking her little sister out on a date. Apparently, there is still resentment because of this. But, I chose who I chose before I was in a relationship with either. Your best bet is to follow the Lovin' Spoonful's advice "... you better go home son and make up your mind..."

Back when I had mercury poisoining (terrible terrible long ordeal absolutely the worst thing that ever happened to me) I had the same effect. As I detoxified over about a year period, it returned to its normal pearlescent hue. You may just have some toxins or chemical imbalance. But if it hurts when you ejaculate, go see the Dr.

petrolatum and parrafin cooked down with a ratio of about 8 to 1 petrolatum to parrafin. Lasts a long time.

Sex disgusting? Wha? No habla jibba-jabba.

There are so many different types of breasts. Love 'em medium to large and rounded. Don't like the yam-shaped ones like they've never worn a bra. Ladies, do us guys a favor and wear a bra most of the time. Gravity has a terrible effect.

Be grateful he's not hittin' the booze before goin' out. Then you'd have a problem. My advice: don't sweat it. If it gets irritating to be around him when he's high, then either don't be hangin with him, or just get high with him. Just don't nag at him about it. If you would rather that he stopped, do so in a sly manner over time.

It's a great big world out there and we are just small little flecks of dust hovering in the heat of the light, yet reflecting all the brilliance of the sun like multi colored diamonds. Whatever happens, remember that ultimately you only have to answer to one: yourself. If you are your biggest critic, then that is terrible; you should be your biggest advocate. Think about all those wonderful characteristics that make you uniquely you. Worrying about the things that you have no control over is like trying to put out a fire with acetone. It ignites and consumes you so that you worry about the things you have control over. Thus starts a terrible spiral. Whenever you feel those feelings of being disconnected from yourself and anxious, do this: breathe slowly and think about how the worse thing that could happen is not nearly as bad as the how you are feeling at the present. As far as talking in front of a large crowd there are a few techniques that work. An old tried and true method is imagining everyone in the audience is naked. Another is to seek out a several pleasing faces before you speak, and then casting your gaze amongst these friendly faces as you speak. Imagine that your audience is just a bunch of kindergarten age children and you are the teacher. There are always solutions... feeling desperate and anxious is never one of them. Formulate a plan. Be flexable Skip stones Daydream Relax skillfully Do whatever it takes

If the Kama Sutra has any merit at all, then you are not being shallow at all. It kinda logically breaks it down into there are three types of people: Men are either Hares, Bulls or Horses. Woman are either Deer, Mares, or Elephants. Logically the perfect of unions would be as thus- Hares with Deers, Bulls with Mares, and Horses with Elephants. If you can only find pleasure with men of great girth, then that would put you in the category of elephant. That sux. The extremes on the scale are not so good... A hare and an elephant or a horse and a deer would not work so well. Being in the middle is a bit more advantageous, as there are more people in this middle ground and going one way or the other on the scale wont have as drastic a difference. Logical.

Whenever I have to deal with a person that makes me feel a little nervous, I imagine what they were like when they were 7 years old. Any anxiety quickly vanishes; works like a charm!

Right on... thanks all. I'm not gonna put all my eggs into her basket. at least not yet. I'll just enjoy the time we spend together and still keep my vistas wide open, as there are others.

Never underestimate the power of your tongue and hands. Don't go for the gold immediately; drive her crazy first. Be creative and lose your sense of humility. Ask her what she likes, then do it. Tell her what you like and hope she does it. If you two are really in love, look into her eyes when you come. Don't crash out, unless you know she has been pleased. Talk with her afterwards and give each other massages. Once the fortitide returns, repeat the process.

Thanks, I've pretty much came to the same conclusion, and I will wait for her. But in the meantime there's that 20 year old sweetie that wants to hang out.... hmmm. Just don't want to hurt the possability of the the other, as she is the one I'd probably better off with in the long run.

It's simple, really: Intelligent woman = attractive know-it-all woman = unattractive A woman that can converse and hold her own = attractive A monopolizer of the conversation = unattractive A woman that asks questions = attractive A woman that pretends that she knows = not attractive A woman that can admit her faults = attractive A woman that thinks she's perfect = not attractive A woman that is an eclectic reader = attractive A romance novel fiend/ tabloid fiend = not attractive ETC

What the media sells is garbage. To me the most attractive woman is one with a little weight. Not fat, but voluptuous like the women in those old romantic-era paintings. Why I prefer this as opposed to the athletic type or the skinny type I haven't really considered. There is a certain sense of health and well being there, I guess. Perhaps subconsciously, a skinny woman seems sick and frail- too obsessed with weight or in some way deprived. An overly fat woman would also convey the same message just reversed, but also in some way sick. Athletic types are attractive to me, but not as attractive as those that are voluptuous. There is something primal in woman of this type... a certain air of fertility and it really turns me on....

Stay away from Durex. Lifestyles are okay especially the ultra-thin, but if you are large they can be a little tight. If you are large, magnums are the way to go. If your girlfriend has a latex allergy, use natural-lamb as an alternative. If you use a condom with spermacide, make sure that the tip doesn't get popped when it is on, as this could send some of this burning, toxic solution right where you don't want it to go. Trust me, it'll put an end to the mood your in. But most of all, make sure that you are both ready. Don't force her too much. Remember that no means no, no matter how heated things may get. If this is the first time for you both, you will never forget each other no matter what the future will hold. Have fun, it's life and it's great!

Dear Dude, My motto is "Let Go" and it is a good motto to live by. I used to hold on so tight that when my grip relaxed I was sore all over. I was in a long term (10 year) relationship that had a very painful and humiliating end about a year and a half ago. I learned so much from this experience. The main lesson was that life goes on and in many ways has become richer and more fun. It was like getting introduced to the guy I was when I was in my early 20s. I learned to live life for the day and enjoy the freedom of losing the 150 lb sack of flesh that I was carrying on my back. So don't sweat it. If you cast your eyes elsewhere, she'll probably try to come back into your view. If not, then just kick back and enjoy the scenery...

You need to scare him off. Find a large male friend/ family member of yours and hang out with him more often. Let him answer the phone for you. If this guy is anything like you described, he may be the stalking type. I don't wanna make you worried, but you need to be careful. If all else fails you can go the legal route and get a retraining order. That kinda sux, but remember that you have the option to not be preyed upon.