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behind_these_eyes

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  1. behind_these_eyes
    The exact same thing happened to me last year. It was really weird cause I really had no idea what I had done. A few months later my other friend told me that this girl didn't want to be my friend because I didn't get trashed anymore and she was sick of going to the movies and doing normal things. For a while I was really upset, and I wished she had told me and maybe we could have talked about it. Then I realized that I shouldn't have to do things differently for her to want to hang out with me. That's just stupid. If your friend has a problem with you, it's just that--her problem. So my advice to you is to just look at it this way- You've done all you can, and it's up to her now. If she wants to be angry and not let you know why, take advantage of that. Ignorance is bliss.
  2. behind_these_eyes
    Thank you so much for listening and offering up so much advice to help me. I know it must sound stupid to hear a 17 year old complaining about life. I also know that there are a lot of great things in most situations no matter how bad they look. I guess I have trouble seeing that or something. The song really helped me, again thanks for your time.
  3. behind_these_eyes
    For a while, I was really sad, but I looked forward to college and everything beyond. I'm seeing more and more in the posts that people who are older aren't necessarily having a great time either. I also notice that lots of adults are always reminiscing and talking about their memories. Is that how it works? Do we just go through life looking forward to something, only to find that when it's right in front of us, we'll be too busy remembering times before? I guess I just want to know, in honesty, if there is anything to look forward to. If things have gone this far downhill already, who knows how much worse they could get with time? Pessimistic, I know, but thanks anyway if you actually read that babble.
  4. behind_these_eyes
    Movies. And maybe the occasional Nsync song. Ok kidding, but I can't tell you where the secret clubhouse is.
  5. behind_these_eyes
    Ironically, they're all looking for guys like you. That's the way it always goes.
  6. behind_these_eyes
    That's a really powerful poem, and it's wicked sad. I hope it isn't something you went through, and if it is, I'm really sorry.
  7. behind_these_eyes
    You should just be blunt with her and ask when you see her. I dont think that was a "nice no", but some people are hard to read. Anyways what's there to lose? Good Luck.
  8. behind_these_eyes
    That's awesome! I'm really happy for you, it's great that you know exactly what you're gonna do and how you're gonna do it. Don't give up, you seem really determined and I know you'll reach your goals. Good luck.
  9. behind_these_eyes
    I know *exactly* how you feel. Unfortunately, if I had any really good advice to give, I'd probably already have been able to help myself. All I can tell you is that you are not the only one. I think everyone goes through this. I don't know what to tell except that you can talk to me any time.
  10. behind_these_eyes
    thought I was the only one.
  11. behind_these_eyes
    you're really right. people can be such assbags.
  12. behind_these_eyes
    This is kind of hard to write, cause it's gross and I don't really like thinking about it, but I feel like I need to get it out in the open so hopefully I can forget about it and be normal again. Basically, the other day my dad went to bed early, and I thought nothing of it. The next day while he was at work, I was watching tv in his room cause my tv doesn't get cable, and I was looking at all the pay per view stuff, looking for a movie. There was this thing that said "My rentals," the things already paid for. I looked, hoping he already rented a good movie and I wouldn't have to pay for another... I don't know, but I'm assuming "Accidental Stripper" and "Erotic Volume 3" are not the latest Jack Black films...so naturally, I was grossed out beyond belief. I guess it could be normal, but I can't get past it. For the past 2 days, I haven't been able to look him in the eye, and I feel uncomfotable being in the same room as him. I guess I have a few questions: Has this happened to anyone else, am I just being weird, and what can I do to feel comforable around him again? Thanks for listening, any advice is greaatly appreciated.
  13. behind_these_eyes
    I think life is kind of like this giant gray area. People either expect it to be completely black or completely white, and that screws them up. Sometimes I'll wake up feeling okay, expecting the day to go my way, and then by 10:00 a load of crap slaps me in the face and the rest of the day sucks. Other days I wake up feeling bad about myself, and it turns out not too bad when I reflect on it later. I try not to expect things anymore, good or bad. I just assume things will be a toss-up. Actually to be honest, that's what I've been told to do. I still see everything pessimistically, so I don't know what I'm preaching about.
  14. behind_these_eyes
    I think this is one of those things they say "time will heal." It seems like she needs some time to sort things out and figure out what she really wants. It sounds really cliche, but if you were meant to be together, she'll realize her mistake and want you back. Sometimes to realize you need something you have to go without it for a while.
  15. behind_these_eyes
    tell her why. only you know that. good luck.
  16. behind_these_eyes
    i know this was posted over a month ago, but I just read it, and thought it was incredible. I hope you're okay though, and keep up the great writing.
  17. behind_these_eyes
    I don't do it, to be honest I've thought about it, but I think so many people do it on tv and in movies now when theyre depressed that it almost makes sense to do it when you feel completely miserable. It's kind of expected. Not to say that it's right, I just think when people are hopeless they think of what other people do to feel better.
  18. behind_these_eyes
    No matter what anyone says, I think that it's impossible to quit smoking unless you're really serious about it. There have been times I've wanted to quit, and I would for like 2 weeks, and then I'd cave. Then, something happens where you just kind of realize you're fine without it. I can't really explain what made me quit for good, but I recommend stocking up on blow pops, menthol cough drops, and baby carrots. Eat them when you want one. Good luck!
  19. behind_these_eyes
    She climbed. It was high up and it was far down, But she climbed. She pulled herself upward through the maze of branches, Settling on the highest one In the tallest tree. She sighed. Gazing at the sorrow below, She laughed- For the first time in a long time. She slowly shut her eyes, felt her support begin to shatter. Nature's cradle was releasing her, But she wasn't holding on. She fell. It was high up and it was far down. But she fell.
  20. behind_these_eyes
    It's jealousy. I know, I know, that's a cliche' answer, but it's really true. She feels threatened or something. Maybe she'd the butt of the jokes with her other friends, so she needs a target to divert negative attention away from her. Either way, ditch her. Anyone who outwardly disrespects you when you're around will only be more brutal when you aren't around.
  21. behind_these_eyes
    I think this poem kind of sucks, but I had it lying around and wanted to know what people thought. It's not a cry for help or attention or anything; I wrote it a while ago when I was feeling really down. Hope lived in a small town Where some had never known her And others had forgotten her But she was alone. Escaping heavy weights, She disappeared to find That all she had and all she was Just never was enough. No one noticed Hope or that she felt she wasn't needed She left each day, came back the same, And no one knew she'd gone. One day Hope lost herself She up and left the small town. But this time she didn't return. And this time people noticed. They searched for her day and night, in the cold. Now they knew how Hope felt every day; desperately searching for something she'd never find alive. They found Hope, far beyond repair. They wished to God that they could revive her. But all they had and all they were Would never be enough.
  22. behind_these_eyes
    Don't give up, your life isn't a pea. I don't know if it's a poem you wrote to illustate a feeling, or if it's what you actually feel like all the time. All I can say is that you shouldn't hurt yourself, I don't really know what else to say. That's really deep.
  23. behind_these_eyes
    You're going to think this is weird, but I think you should do it. My advice: Take all the money you have saved, take time off of work. If you don't care about your work, don't care about losing it. It may be the best thing that's ever happened to you. Then, get in a bus or a plane or a train or your car or anything. Just go. Who cares where, just do it. When you're away from home, you can think about all this other stuff you had no idea you even thought. You'll be proving to yourself that you have all these possibilities. You can go anywhere, and you can do anything. If you aren't motivated to do any of that, take someone. They can be your cheerleader. You can make it accross the country, even if there really is no obvious reason to do so. I really can't explain further why I think you should do all that, I'm a little confused about it myself. All I know is that if you check out when you're 23, you won't notice when something finally does come along. You have plenty of time to do whatever you want. Sometimes that's scary, I guess.
  24. behind_these_eyes
    The only people that call these "the best days of our lives" are already older. People love when things are possible, and when your past suddenly seems longer than your future, you enjoy memories more than expectations. That's why people are always reflecting on their teenage years. Hindsight is always 20/20, and although most people were probably just as confused as us when they were 17, they see everything more clearly in retrospect. Personally, I think our best days haven't happened yet. That's just fine with me though, cause I'd rather have something to look forward to than something to remember. Who knows what I'm talking about anyway though? I'm definitely no genius, just letting you know you're not alone.
  25. behind_these_eyes
    I think obsession is when you're in love with the idea of being in love with someone. Sometimes people are like walking comfort zones, either because you've known them so long, or because you don't know them at all and you have all these expectations of what they'll be like. Unfortunately, I can't even tell you what love is, so I'll stop pretending that I'm wise or something. Good luck, hope some of my babbling helped.
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