sumguy
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Everything posted by sumguy
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Turns out I'm stupid, thanks for the kind words though ^_^
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I have a massive list of Kiwi jokes, if you want to hear them..? ^_^ I always go walking/photographing when I'm bored, I wish I was in New Zealand - oh, the natural things you must have down there, I'm surrounded by suburbia and flat plains here... =/ But the best way to absolve boredom is to plunge right on in to a heavy project, you write good poetry. Why not write a poetry book..? Alright, maybe that wasn't the best suggestion, but you get the idea.
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Pride is all well and good, but there's a place for it and there's a place where it just makes a bad situation worse. The trick is identifying wether the current situation is the former or the latter...
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Trapped inside your shallow games How does it feel? Why is there always someone else to blame For the things you do to yourself? Do you think that all the problems that came Are the fault of someone else? Look what you've done! Is this how you wanted it to end? Tired and angry... Look what's become! Is this who you thought I should be? It's not me... There was a time I'd have given the world to see you smile But now I've grown up And I see beneath you, shallow and vile So don't try to force your lies on me I don't live just to please! Look what you've done! Is this how you wanted it to end? Tired and angry... Look what's become! Is this who you thought I should be? It's not me... My feet carry me further From street to street I blow The road is paved with pain and hurt I try to sort the thoughts that flow My head just wants to escape you But my heart needs to know: Look what you've done! Is this how you wanted it to end? Tired and angry... Look what's become! Is this who you thought I should be? Well, that's not me...
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Or it could be glue complex, you only want them because someone else has them.
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He thinks he's in love with me after 2 weeks
sumguy replied to Blured's topic in Relationship Advice
If you're the first girl he feels this for, then I can tell you from experience that you fall hard and fast for the first one, but it burns out quickly. You might find the feelings fade in long run, in the next month or so... ...but that doesn't help in the immediate, mivra has the right idea, but I suggest you're a little stricter than that. No "Maybe Laters", just make it perfect clear that in the here and now it's making you uncomfortable... any good friend will stop. -
Life is like a shooting star, it blazes into existence and fades away just as suddenly, but for the brief time it's there it lights up the sky and touch's hundreds... Condolences. ;_;
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Some guys can keep it buried deeply, other's can barely contain it. The easiest way to find out is to see if he makes eye contact, and to see how he carries on a conversation.
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Advice? Give him time and space to heal, even if it isn't what you want Youngstar62, hopefully he will be willing to forgive you after he has had the time to deal with it. And I'm sorry if I got out of line, Infidelity is my pet peeve. =/
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When you bottom-line it, you don't want to give this guy room to heal because of something you did to him, and no matter what language you speak, that translates to selfish. Even helping find a job, or helping him change, was that for his own good, or yours? Was that born of noble ideas, or selfish desires? Giving him space is the text book answer, it's tried and true. All we can do here is give you advice, but seeing as you know the best move and you want to disregard it - not for his own emotional health, but because you want to - then don't be surprised if the replies aren't all sweetness and light.
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I've always heard that you wait three days from when you first get the number... but then, there seem to be more of these rules than there are people going on dates... Do call her though, if she likes you but is also hanging out for a phone call, then by not calling her she might feel ignored.
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Also, you just called him lazy and feeble-minded again... Are you a woman or a... uh... field mouse? Do you need someone to take care of you? We make concessions for those we truly love, we don't disregard their feelings and cheat on them...
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Yeah, it's not like you can really say: "No, I meant that other ..." if she ever finds your posts... ^_^ Sometimes this happens, all you can do is giver her space. Like Gold Hawk said, maybe drop her an email from time to time, say hi if you see her on the street, but if she wants you to leave her alone than you really haven't got much choice... One day she may wake up and realise just how her current boyfriend is treating her, and maybe on that day she'll remember you and what you said, and how you tried to help, and she'll go back to being your friend again.
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Unfortunately it's very hard. Users have had a lot of practice, usually they can emulate friendship very well until they get what they want out of you, then you find yourself dropped. If someone's always asking you for favours, never picks up the tab, you're always initiating contact and making plans and acts distantly towards you when you bump into them on the street, then it's likely that you're being used. Also, a user will almost uniformally use phrases like: "I thought we were friends" or "Don't you like me anymore" when you refuse to do something for them, guilt is their weapon, and they weild it like a club. But even remembering all that, it's hard to differentiate a friend for a user, the only real way to tell is Hindsight, which is always 20/20.
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You cheated on him, that would have hurt. You called him lazy and feeble-minded, that would have hurt. He breaks up with you so he can sort through his issues with you, and you don't want to give him the luxury? Maybe I'm young and inexperienced, and maybe because I'm male I'm identifying with the other side, but give the poor guy some room to heal! You basically ripped your fiance's heart out...
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Things can go three ways from here. 1. You talk about it, clear the air, things will never go back to the same but they will become more normal. 2. You don't talk about it, continue with this strained friendship until eventually you become too distant to be friends. It causes hurt on both sides. 3. You talk about it, and the friendship ends abruptly, which is unlikely and probably better for you in the long run. It doesn't sound like she wants to stop being friends with you, it sounds more like she doesn't know where she stands in relation to the friendship anymore, and doesn't know how to act towards you. Talking now, before more time passes and things become more uncomfortable, is the best option. Because even if you end up with option 1 or 3, option 2 is the worst one for you, it will hurt like hell for as long as you know her, and lead to bitterness.
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That doesn't sound healthy... Have you talked with her about it? If not, a long, non-threatening heart-to-heart might clear things on your end. Be careful though, I've seen relationships collapse because the guy became so insistant on knowing that the girl felt overwhelmed... If she doesn't want to talk about it, all you can really do is acknowledge this and back off.
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It sounds like you may have been used, I hope that isn't the case, but without more information that's the conclusion I'm drawing from it. As for having more girl friends than guy friends, that's not weird at all. A lot of people are like that. I used to have this mate - Steve M - He was friends with basically every girl in school, and maybe he had three or four guy friends. I tell you what though, the insights he gained have apparently made him a hit with the ladies...
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What do you means "Took Tablets"? Valium, Anti-depressents, or something more sinister? This guy - despite being 28 - acted very immaturely towards you. He should have understood that at 16 you had your own ambitions and goals that you need to fulfill. Not everyone is like that, some people will understand. I understand what you're feeling - to some extent I've felt it myself - and you need to hang in there and work through the hate and anger. Don't be afraid to rely on your current friends, they always want to help you in their own ways, and their input and sympathy can turn a bad situation around. Understand that what happened wasn't your fault, that you're better than that other guy, that you don't need it. As you've said, you're 16, you have plenty of time to heal and get into new relationships. I hope this helped =)
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...are...are you sure you even like him? I mean, you like him, but you can't stand to have him touch you or contact you? If this were a normal case of "smothering" you'd just have to tell him nicely that you need a little space... but how do you go out with someone and not touch them..? Isn't attraction part of liking someone?!
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Learneth to love thy self.
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There are easier, less messy ways...
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I usually walk it out... except this time I might end up in Sydney... So I'd like some opinions on other, perhaps healthier, ways to deal with severe emotional turmoil. What do you do?
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Wow, that was a beautifully written poem... if I could write like that I'd be outta here so fast... Keep up the great work! ^_^
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P.S: If anyone is wondering, Aulus died in battle six weeks later over a minor territorial conflict, but that's beside the point and hopefully not prophetic.