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Deviant_Kate

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Everything posted by Deviant_Kate

  1. Deviant_Kate
    While you're waiting, be supportive, let her know that you don't blame her for the lessened desire. Obviously, you should probably tone it down just a bit so she doesn't feel hounded, but don't give up - whether or not you blame her for the lack of sex, it could still pull you guys apart. Maybe you could settle for 1-2 times a week? I don't know...it's a tough situation. I hope it works out for you both.
  2. Deviant_Kate
    There's almost no chance she could get pregnant from what you described. I think polyurethane condoms are pretty damn reliable. Definitely talk to her about going on the pill, AND about getting tested if she hasn't been since her last partner. If she gets on a reliable form of oral contraceptive, once she's been on it long enough for it to be in full effect you guys might be able to chuck the condoms. It might not be a bad idea to invest in some spermicide too. It's always best to cover your bases, and they say two forms of birth control are best. It might take a little of the spontenaity out of it, but not much more than putting on a condom does.
  3. Deviant_Kate
    It sounds like besides your lack of orgasm, it's a great relationship - it would be silly to give up on a good thing. Talk to him about trying to last a little longer before he orgasms so that you get a little more out of it. Reassure him that he's doing everything fine, but that you want him to hold off a few more minutes. Someone else recommended having him get you close to orgasm with foreplay first - not a bad idea at all. Communication Communication Communication!
  4. Deviant_Kate
    What she said. There's nothing ugly about your "girl parts." Seventeen year old boys are basically stupid (No offense to those seventeen year old boys reading this, 'cause I know you're not all stupid sacks of immaturity). Like others have said, if any one of those guys actually saw you naked, they'd undoubtedly forget all about their hatred of vaginas. Love yourself! Confidence is sexy.
  5. Deviant_Kate
    I didn't realize there were requirements like that made on posting. I didn't come eNotAlone to get help - I came to offer it where applicable so I could feel like I was a part of the LGBT community. This is the only time I've ever even made my own post...I was just curious. I can't believe the first reply I got was to complain that I wasn't looking for advice...
  6. Deviant_Kate
    Thanks! She's a sweetheart.
  7. Deviant_Kate
    I'm not really sure what percentage of women can reach multiple orgasms from penetration, but we are out there. I can't say whether or not you'll be disappointed in your next sexual relationship, but your goddess was not one of a kind when it comes to multiple orgasms. I've had over 20 orgasms from penetration in one (long) session. My norm is 2-6 at a time, and they start almost immediately. We DO exist!
  8. Deviant_Kate
    That's always been my feelings on the subject. It's kind of ridiculous the way guys go nuts when they find out I have a girlfriend - you don't know how many times a guy has offered to "help out" in the bedroom. I just tell 'em "nope. We've got everything under control." When people ask us who the "man" is in the relationship, I say "there is no man, that's why it works so well."
  9. Deviant_Kate
    I wasn't trying to be hetero-friendly, I was trying to be funny.
  10. Deviant_Kate
    It could be psychosomatic or physiological...I don't know exactly how you'd know this, but do you still get erections in your sleep? That's how the docs figure out if it's physical or mental...if you can still get them in your sleep, it's all in your head.
  11. Deviant_Kate
    That intercourse question isn't very gay friendly. Now...if you replace "intercourse" with "hot lesbian sex," then all three, the night before last.
  12. Deviant_Kate
    Certainly possible, but not very probable unless you have a messed up cycle. ALWAYS use protection, regardless. You shouldn't take chances like that unless you're ready to be a walking baby farm.
  13. Deviant_Kate
    Maybe if the man was laying with his full body on the counter for the standard "woman-on-top" position. That way she's doing all the work but doesn't have to be standing to do it (I for one can't orgasm if I also have to stand up).
  14. Deviant_Kate
    Don't put too much pressure on yourself to perform. Don't psych yourself out by worrying that what happened last time will happen again. Do what feels natural, and communicate with your girlfriend! You'll be fine
  15. Deviant_Kate
    I'd stay away from food if I were you. That's not something you do for your first time together. I just recommend going with the flow - doing what feels right, but make sure you don't spook her by jumping straight to the genitals. Take things slow, take your cues from her reactions. You'll be fine. And don't be afraid to laugh and smile - if something funny happens, it's better to laugh about it and move on than act like something terrible happened. Good luck, and congratulations!
  16. Deviant_Kate
    I guess as far as landscaping that area, I'd talk to whoever you happen to be sleeping with to see if they have a preference...as far as toilet paper bits....perhaps take a quick shower? Or invest in some moist toilet wipes. I was always pretty nervous about stuff like that, but I'm with someone now who is so crazy about that part of my body, that I have nothing to be nervous about because I know that I'm being worshipped, not judged. Maybe if you talked to your special someone, you'd discover that he feels the same way about YOUR body that my special someone feels about mine.
  17. Deviant_Kate
    maybe you need to put yourself in her shoes for a second, pal. Imagine being with someone who expects you to just lay back and open your legs. How must it make her feel to hear crap like "if you really loved me, you'd have sex with me." Sex should not be the most important thing in your relationship. I'm amazed at her patience - I'd have dumped you for acting like this.
  18. Deviant_Kate
    Don't let this guy pressure you into doing something you don't think you're ready for. If you want to wait for someone special, wait for someone special. The RIGHT girl won't be turned off by your virgin status. If your friend is as decent as you think he is, he should understand that you don't want to rush into making this decision.
  19. Deviant_Kate
    It'll be five years for me this December, but I didn't go through the internal persecution that you went through. I'd have to say you've made commendable progress, FoxLocke. It's a beautiful thing to see the way you've turned your life around.
  20. Deviant_Kate
    The morning after pill doesn't induce your period - it just prevents pregnancy. It's basically just a big dose of birth control hormones. It will NOT continue working for a week, so you DO need to get another one. Like others have said though - you shouldn't be taking huge doses of hormones every damn week. It's called the emergency contraceptive pill because it should be used for EMERGENCIES, not as a substitute for being responsible and using condoms and/or being on the pill. If you don't have a condom and you're not on the pill, DON'T HAVE SEX. It's not that difficult. If you simply can't control yourself, settle for oral. Don't be stupid and risk a pregnancy because you can't control your urges. Sorry if I'm being a little preachy, but it took forever to get the EC pill on the shelves because people kept arguing that if the ECP was available, people would become more lax about protecting themselves. Please don't prove them right.
  21. Deviant_Kate
    I think DetrimentalContemplations had some damn good advice. I think that you do need to cut contact so you can have some time to heal without her emails constantly reopening the wound. DetrimentalContemplations is right though - you should explain yourself to your ex. Tell her that you don't want to lose touch completely, but you need some time to heal before you try being friends. You need some time to get settled into your new life - some time to figure out how to stand on your own. You can't do that if she's constantly emailing you. You need to prove to yourself that you can live without her.
  22. Deviant_Kate
    theRedQueen - When I said women can easily conceal their arousal, I meant in situations where we are clothed and don't have someone's hand down our pants (or up our skirts). Women don't get spontaneous boners. thereforeeee, women can easily conceal arousal.
  23. Deviant_Kate
    "is ezer for her to wait wile for me is a pain and depreses me" It's probably not as easy for her to wait as it looks. We women can conceal our arousal, but that doesn't mean it isn't there and that doesn't mean it isn't difficult and frustrating for us to stop.
  24. Deviant_Kate
    My first thought would be to stop drinking. You're the same age as my BABY sister. I would kick her butt if she was getting drunk at the age of 15.
  25. Deviant_Kate
    The U.S. is the only non-Jewish nation that routinely circumcizes their boys. It's barbaric.
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