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Dannysgirl

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Everything posted by Dannysgirl

  1. Dannysgirl
    Does she paint the times that she engaged in this behaviour in a positive light? If not then I would say you might be making too much of it and overthinking it. How old was she when she did this?
  2. Dannysgirl
    Have you asked her if she would consider having casual sex again herself? Lets say if you were to break up? If so novaseeker could be on the right track. If not then perhaps she is just remaining open minded about casual sex in principle.
  3. Dannysgirl
    Yes but is she having casual sex now? I don't personally think there is anything wrong with casual sex if both parties know exactly what they are getting into either but I would baulk at the idea of doing it myself. The thought of having sex without any feelings involved makes me shudder but that doesn't mean I'm against it in principle. Do you worry that she WILL go out and do this with somebody else?
  4. Dannysgirl
    I agree with the others, this is unforgiveable. If this is truly the way she feels she clearly has no business being in a relationship. How would she feel if you expressed similar sentiments to her? Its time to evaluate your relationship and decide whether its really worth being with somebody who prioritizes everything else in her life above you.
  5. Dannysgirl
    If you're ever in a situation like this again I would try to take it as slow as you can physically. Sleeping with a guy too soon can spell disaster usually for one of three reasons those being that the guy has 'gotten what he wanted' and is no longer interested in maintaining a relationship, the guy thinks the woman is easy and does this kind of thing with every guy she meets, or the mystique has gone before any deeper feeling have had an opportunity to develop. However in this case I think the guy realised he was falling headlong into a relationship and got scared which is why he backed off. Perhaps he truly ISNT ready for a relationship although personally I've always thought that was a cop out especially if the guy did all the chasing to start with. Keep dating other people and try to put this down to experience.
  6. Dannysgirl
    Does it really matter what her attitude towards sex was before you were together? Ultimately whats important is that you are on the same page regarding sex NOW isn't it? I don't think that casual sex is really a terrible thing as long as both parties realise that is what it is and are okay with it. I don't think that the fact that your girlfriend had casual sex in the past is an indication of a sleazy character or anything either. She has clearly decided that sex within a committed relationship is far better. Don't punish her for what she did in the past, she can't take it back now besides all of the experiences she had then is what has made her the person you care about so much. Forget about her past its not worth ruining an otherwise good relationship for.
  7. Dannysgirl
    I just wanted to throw another suggestion as to why he may be behaving this way out there.. Is it possible he just wants to find out that you're NOT doing so well so he can get off on the fact that you 'still want him?' I've known a lot of guys like that who have contacted me just to make sure I was still thinking about THEM as a way of boosting their pathetic little ego's. Regardless of the reason its time to go strict NC so you can move on.
  8. Dannysgirl
    Try not to worry to much about her, you have done everything you can for her. Cut these people out of your life completely. Block his email address/phone number etc and do not respond to any of his attempts to contact you. By all means go ahead with your role in the custody battle but try not to let yourself be burdened with a feeling of responsibility for this guy's current girlfriend. I know you feel its your responsibility to warn others about him but you have done everything you can so its now time to let it go and start looking after YOU. Have you had any counselling regarding his abuse? That would probably be a good way of moving on afterwards. There are many womens aid groups that offer free counselling to women who have been victims of this kind of abuse and I would suggest you seek it out to allow you to purge all of this from your system.
  9. Dannysgirl
    There is nothing more you can do, she is going to have to find out for herself. Just be glad that YOU got away from him, you have done all you can to show this girl what he's like but ultimately she is not your responsibility. If she wants to ignore what you have told her that is her decision to make. She will find out what you were talking about soon enough and hopefully she will have the courage to leave as you did.
  10. Dannysgirl
    Before I got married I would get a lot of attention from tall men some of whom were up to 6'5 inches tall! (I am 4'8 . I always wondered why taller men would always go for me rather than my shorter counterparts - it would stand to reason wouldn't it? I asked one of the taller guys I dated why this was and his response was 'you're so tiny, petite and pretty we just want to look after you' but surely a shorter guy would be able to 'look after' a shorty such as I with so significant problems? I eventually ended up marrying a lovely short guy (5'1) and don't think I could date a tall guy ever again as I love the fact that we are around the same height and I don't have to stand on a chair to kiss him lol. Well at least there is one short girl you don't have to wrry about stealing all the big guys away eh?
  11. Dannysgirl
    What an idiot, how does who you see and what you do concern this moron? Block his number and ignore him from now on he doesn't want YOU he just wants to be secure in the knowledge that you want HIM.
  12. Dannysgirl
    If someone touches you when they don't really need/have to I would say that qualifies as them being interested. Why don't you casually ask her out for a drink after work?
  13. Dannysgirl
    I have a hip problem which means I have poor abduction in my left hip which can be a bit of a pain during sex but I don't usually notice it that much and if it does bother me then we just use a different position. My husband is conscious of it and is careful not to do anything that would cause a flare-up of pain. What is the nature of your disability? If you have a partner that cares for you then sex won't be a problem because you'll iron out those problems togoether. To be honest I don't even think about it anymore.
  14. Dannysgirl
    Twice with different people. The first time- two weeks lasted three months after that. The second time after ten days, have now been happily married to him for just over a year.
  15. Dannysgirl
    Unfortunately that won't work because I married a Pittsburgher and just bought a house so moving really isn't an option...
  16. Dannysgirl
    Thanks you or your responses, you've made a lot sense. I suppose my problem is that I never had enough confidence to go for anything better for fear of being laughed out of the room. I would love to work in Media as a researcher but Pittsburgh isn't exactly a hotbed for production/TV companies unfortunately.. Any ideas of where else I could try for a position of that nature?
  17. Dannysgirl
    I'm in a bit of a career rut at the moment. I moved to Pittsburgh PA just over a year ago and don't know what to do in regards to my career. I have a degree and an excellent resume and am currently working as a receptionist. This position bores me out of my mind because I am capable of so much more. However that is where all my work experience is (apart from a couple of years as a reporter) so how can I justify going for anything else? Also, I am trying to get a job I can get to on my own at the moment as I don't drive and have been applying for many admin/reception jobs and haven't even been getting a call back! I just don't understand it, my resume is absolutely flawless in every way - I've had it evaluated by many professional people and they have all told me there is absolutely nothing that could be improved upon. Should I take my degree off my resume? That is the only thing I can think off that might be putting off potential employers maybe they think 'this woman has got a degree and is way over qualified so why does she want a job as a receptionist?' The problem is I don't really WANT to be a receptionist but what else can I do? I have recently made friends with another green card holding British expat who says she has had similar problems getting employment; do you think there is some subconscious prejudice there towards foreigners?
  18. Dannysgirl
    What exactly is it to him whether you're in a relationship or not? Obviously he's upset that you have moved on because he's one of those people who doesn't want his ex back but just wants to be safe in the knowledge that YOU want HIM for the sake of his ego. What a sad loser, lose his number for sure.
  19. Dannysgirl
    I know it sounds heartless but wouldn't it be better and safer if you just packed his things and took them over to his mothers place? If he's not inside the house or anywhere near you when he realises whats going on he can't harm you can he? The most important thing here is your safety. If in doubt don't let him near you. Remember you don't owe him anything not even the break up speech if you think he's going to do something stupid. Hell, send the guy a text message with 'its over your stuff is at your mothers/in the road ta ta' if in doubt.
  20. Dannysgirl
    I would definitely advise that and get that person to stay there with you until he leaves. If you leave him there on his own he may end up damaging/stealing your property. My psycho ex slashed my clothes and stole my valuables when I ended it with him. Remember to get the locks changed once he's out and don't answer the door to him if he calls round.
  21. Dannysgirl
    Yes I agree with the others, you REALLY need to tell this man to get out of your place - otherwise this situation is never going to end. Why should you wait around and put your life on hold for this idiot? you have been putting up with his BS for months now when there is no reason to. You owe him absolutely nothing, he's a big boy and he can take care of himself.
  22. Dannysgirl
    Get those utilities changed over asap and then tell him you want him to leave by weeks end. Just be very calm about it, but tell him its non negotiable. Tell him he is to sleep on the couch until he leaves and if he doesn't like it he can sleep on a friends couch. Even better would be if you were to sling he stuff out in the road while he's at work and have the locks changed - problem solved!
  23. Dannysgirl
    Is it YOUR place? Does he have any claim to it at all? If not then you have every right to ask him to leave and if he doesn't you should ask the landlord to have him evicted. Why don't you speak to your landlord FIRST before you do anything to see if he would back you up if it came to that - I'm sure he doesn't want any trouble and if he was unwilling to so you could always say you fear that this guy will damage the property (tell him about how he kicked and punched the wall) and i'm sure that he would be more than happy to remove him. Besides that you can always have him removed by the police. I wouldn't worry about what happens to this loser, who cares if he freezes his backside off in the streets? Don't waste valuable time caring about what happens to this waste of space just get him out of your life now before he wears you down.
  24. Dannysgirl
    Oh my God, this guy sounds so much like my ex its not even funny. His names not 'Matt' by any chance is it? He used to pull that stuff with me all the time too - unbelievably controlling selfish individual. He wouldn't go to bed until 3am sometimes and would put the TV on to full volume just to keep me awake as well, he seemed to take some kind of twisted pleasure from watching me going out of my mind with sleep deprivation. Can't you get away from him any sooner?
  25. Dannysgirl
    I wouldn't bother responding. Stick to NC its the best way. I take it she was the dumpee? If so what right does she have to be emailing you? If she is insistent I would respond by saying; 'I would be obliged if you could refrain from contacting me at this time. I don't need any contact with you at the moment as I am trying to heal from this break up.'
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