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blueangel

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Everything posted by blueangel

  1. blueangel
    But then again, he is pretty sexy.... No, Sarah! Bad Sarah! self
  2. blueangel
    uhh...18? heh... he WAS 17 when we started... and okay, yeah, I guess that doesnt matter now. I've fallen in a stupid trap that I helped set up. I just wish I could really get him to realize how much I dont want this- though something tells me he doesnt want to hear it. His lust prevents our friendship to be saved and thereforeeee I'm going to have to eventually do something I'll hate: cut him off completely.
  3. blueangel
    Oh, wait- I missed that I think. There's someone else involved! Then, there may be nothing you can do. SHe needs to realize that she is in a marriage and to that she is bound. Her unfaithfulness could be forgivable, but it is unforgettable. She needs to know the consequences of her actions and what, really she has done- to you and to your child. When my parents separated, I was split in half... I had two lives and the worst part is, I wanted to be part of them both.
  4. blueangel
    You cant (she cant) wait for feelings to just happen to her. She has to chose to act as she would if they were there for them to blossom again. Marriage is a sacred thing that shouldn't just be backed out of especially if you have a child. She wants a friendship but what you both need is love. Talk to her about why she is holding back and what's in her past. Sometimes females act a certain way so that their other will change something about themselves. I dont know why we do this but many do. Do things for her and really show interest in who she is. Let her know how much you care. Space isn't going to do it. If she married you, she has already chosen what it is she wants. It's her actions that she must choose now so tell her to make the choice. Anything can be saved and anything can be lost. If she wants a friendship, then it is because she does not feel fulfilled in that way. Resisting your love as a payback to you (and perhaps to life) is not going to ease her pain. This is something she has to confront with you- and tell her that no matter what, you will always be on her side. It's time for the head games to stop. I'm a female too so i recognize them when I see them- just dont put any blame on her or get defensive. This only causes people to rebel. Understand her. That's all she wants And please let HER know how her actions have made you feel. If you open up, the chances of her doing so as well are greater. Good luck. Communication is always the key
  5. blueangel
    Time is going to take this away. For now, you can condition your mind to do whatever you want it to, but what helps the most is talking and having the support of friends. If you happen to have no friends(hey- some people dont) then what you are doing here is right. Just remember all things are temporary and let your job be top priority so you CAN get things done without thinking of your ex. What we focus on is all a matter of what we want to. Sometimes feeling is dealing and sometimes it IS good to think through what you've been through. It's when it starts interfering with your life that it becomes a problem. Maybe you are thinking that there was more you could have done, but I think that the things that happen were meant to based on the people that we are. Sometimes things aren't entirely our fault and they wouldnt have happened any other way.
  6. blueangel
    It's actually kind of funny now that I'm thinking about it
  7. blueangel
    recently, I've been fooling around with a buddy of mine and when I start kissing him, his hands start roaming. He's never gone farther than that, but lately all he wants to do is kiss me. The kisses are awesome, but we once had a friendship and I'm getting bored. We both secretly want to do more to each other but agreed it wasn't right. Still- he just wants to kiss and kiss and kiss and all he thinks about are ways to get closer to me. I cant even talk to him anymore without him basically drowling over me. I honestly dont know what to do about this one. I dont think our friendship can be saved. I've really learned my lesson, but it doesn't seem to be getting through his thick head that..uh... I want him to stop. I hope not all guys are this stupid. He's going back to college soon so I wont see him, but for now- I cant escape!
  8. blueangel
    Life is too short to hold back
  9. blueangel
    lol I sure stirred up stuff! Can I tell you all something? I didnt read that WHOLE post. I mostly skimmed so I have no idea if opposing his at all was right or wrong. I am very sorry if I offended anyone. My post DID have a ring of truth, but- jeez, you cant expect me to know everything! I AM only 15 and the fact that you people got so wound up over me is very silly. I tried at least, right? At least I said what I was thinking (though if we all used that logic, it would be very weird... because I tend to think of weird things more than I do normal stuff- so really I dont advise that.) By the way, thanks ShySoul for supporting me even if I was being stupid. I'll remember that.
  10. blueangel
    I've just come back to this website but I honestly have been gone for months so dont worry about that.
  11. blueangel
    Teehee
  12. blueangel
    It doesnt flow right- but the rhymes are KOOL I think
  13. blueangel
    Umm... I think you should leave but that's only from an outsider's point of view. The question is are YOU happy?
  14. blueangel
    woah- no replies. That's not cool
  15. blueangel
    You have to remind yourself that there's nothing to lose. If you mess up, she'd be too judgemental to turn you away like that at a simple drop of a hat. Have fun with life (and it'll have fun with you!- ooh, that sounds scary)
  16. blueangel
    You're changing You're changing Dont leave me here alone You're changing You're changing And I dont know If we're going to make it Or if I can let you go Knowing I cant catch you And you'll go on on your own And I should have known That your angry cries Was something that went past tears And if I- Could go back to all those years I might have stopped to hear. I might have stopped to hear. Oh, there are songs of love and song of hate But none of which that can debate What's right or wrong Where you belong But you search them anyway because- Into the crowds, It's happening now My heart is torn in two And in the mirror, I start to see All the sides of you It's like we are two Oh my God, I miss you ... You've made a wrong turn, my forever friend But I swear to you as I've said before I'll be waiting at the end Evermore... ------------- I dont know if this flows but it's my heart.
  17. blueangel
    You have a well balanced head then. I used to have a crush (dont laugh!) on an anime (Japanese animation) girl named Michiru because she was described as soft and sweet and deep and different. She was also a lesbian in this...er...cartoon. (what? I was younger!) and I was obsessed with printing out her pictures and making a scrapbook. Who she was to me just took my breath away and I think the fact that she WAS a lesbian brought out feelings for her. I was also (as I said younger) 13 at the time, which to me, is the hardest year I've been through because my hormones were everywhere. I would actually break down a lot. Well, then I met a guy on the internet (which I swear I'm never doing again- I never stopped to think how dangerous that COULD have been) and all thoughts of her silently slipped away leading me to open another door. It really is about choice of feelings- we really can do that. But I could never be attracted sexually to a girl. Yes, I could convince myself into it overtime and maybe I would have- if it weren't for Dan, my first love... and the one who made me see how much I loved penises! (sorry for language hehe) But it wasnt until I really, really, experienced that... that I knew what was right for me. (obviously, what I am saying here...is yes, I am straight. lol)
  18. blueangel
    Nobody can carry the weight of the world on their shoulders. That's really what's bringing you down. But there is no expectations on you and your life except what you make them to be. We can find happiness anywhere. Look, the sun still shines. You're not into drugs and no matter what you say, there really IS always someone out there who has it much worse. Give it up. Let it go. Let God control and stop fighting. You dont need to. Focus only on the type of person you want to be and how much of that, really, you already are. Find what's good in what you already have. You are a beautiful soul and that too will always be yours... same with your thoughts and your dreams. You are special. Let the burdens go. THEY aren't you. ONly you know who that is and only you can bring it out. No matter what happens on the outside, it's the inside in which our true happiness lies. Knock. Knock. Is she there? (I'm glad you feel better after writing that. Sometimes that's all we need.)
  19. blueangel
    I personally dont believe in hell. Maybe stop basing your beliefs by those of others. We've all been brainwashed! Care for yourself and love unconditionally. what you give you will receive... and all will be fine in the end. As big as God is, it is also a personal relationship if you'd like to view it that way. When I look at nature, it reminds me that no one "up there" is judging me- they always know my heart and support no matter what. God is the core of the universe, everything... but most of all he's HOME... A place to return to when all are weak and tired. It's not good to fight against yourself especially while not even understanding who you are... or who you're supposed to be. Religion is just a way to try to define GOd. Well, I tell you this: it's impossible. God is everything. Everywhere. At all times and at no time at all. The spirit of all that exists... in you and in me. In you and in me...
  20. blueangel
    There's nothing wrong with you. Nobody's happy and outgoing 24/7- they go home to themselves too. They have insecurities too. Just believe in yourself. You have nothing to lose. Take chances and do the unexpected. You'll regret it if you dont. think of it this way- what could a girl say to YOU to make you feel comfortable and understood? Smile and act confident. Then you'll realize you've had it in you all along. Make little goals for yourself. It'll be all right. I've learned that you can be humiliated after many events occur but life goes on and it isn't good to dwell. Nobody else is. Every second you get is a another chance. You dont have to prove yourself. Just let yourself be you. There's nothing to be afraid of in the end. Charm. That's the word. Charm a girl- make her feel special... but do it only because you think she is. No one likes players! Being you is the best way to be different from the crowd- which is what every girl looks out for. No one's judging you. They're waiting to see how you make THEM feel about themselves. Be comfortable, be genuine, be kind and never look back.
  21. blueangel
    Your happiness is what matters. No one should feel painfully obligated to live a certain way. This is YOUR life and that's what counts. You are the one who gets to choose. Either way, I think you'll live. You are also more than just your sexuality. You are a human and those who dont accept you, dont accept themselves. We should accept people no matter who they are, what they've done or where they are going in life. "If we judge people, we'll have no time to love." - MOther Teresa (i think that's how it goes)
  22. blueangel
    The only way to know is to tell her what's in your mind. Maybe she made that up as a way to tell you she's attractive and she can have a relationship. She might also tell you that because she really wants you as a boyfriend. Or to make you jealous or try harder? Maybe she's just scared. Maybe she just wants to make you feel better. NO ONE CAN READ MINDS- dont assume the negative. Put yourself out there. There's no reason you shouldnt have that girl if you tried enough. Girls want to feel noticed- on a deeper level. Remember that. There's no other way. Tell-her-how-you-feel. Trust your gut- it's usually right. See for yourself where she stands... and let her see where you do
  23. blueangel
    a book called Conversations With God by Neale Donald Walsh. It opens the door to see GOd in a whole different light as well as the universe. I was in depression for years and that pulled me RIGHT out of it.. it was amazing actually. God will always love you- no matter what. The Bible is not just a bunch of stories put together to tell us how to live. It is also the greatest love story of all time- of a God and His people. I find that nature actually also has a lot of answers. To me, God IS nature (I know that sounds weird). Hope that helps.
  24. blueangel
    hmm... that is tough. It's really brave of you though to want to do that. If I were you though, I'd try to catch her alone. But if not, here's what I would want a guy to say to me: the guy (hehe this is fun!): You know, I've thought about coming over here so many times, but you're always with your friends. (smile at her for a moment, sincerly and kindly- dont be phony or cocky, body language says a lot) So if you dont mind me asking, would you give me a chance and talk to me alone? (dont leave eyecontact) Confidence is the key. Girls love mystery, someone who stands out from the crowd... they want to feel saved, they want to feel noticed and want to feel understand. WHen you look at her really look at her. If she gets up and walks away with you, say "you have no idea how nervous I was to do that. My name is..." ask hers, ask about school, her interests (give some of yours- now is the time to talk casually and be the real you. dont fake it- girls see through it) what she wants to do in life, what you think about life... think it over before you take the action. Plan it out (loosely though). If this girl refuses you, it's because she's scared and you've found the real reason why she hides behind her friends. If she says, "sorry, no.." think of something to say beforehand so you dont feel caught off guard. You can do it!
  25. blueangel
    You need to stop sugar coating your thoughts into poetic, almost lyrical ones. Get to the point- be real. Not a lot are willing to read all of that. The problem with humans IS the fact that they do so believe so much in fairy tales. Believing is a wonderful thing- an amazing thing, dont get me wrong- but what you believe in is that things-just-happen. They dont. Our fates are made through the characters we are- positive or negative. It was not predestined and so futile to just wait or assume whatever walks your way is the "one." Who are you? Do you know? I feel as if you are holding back the rawness of your emotions, your situation. There is only beauty in pure truth and a ton of lyrical paragraphs isn't going to change that. I once read a book called Conversations with God that completely changed my perspective on EVERYTHING in life- so amazing. The series is getting big too. But my point is, while reading it, I learned that it is not in the doing or receiving or (especially) the waiting that gives us our happiness. It is in the BEING. If you are already being happy, you will attract positive things. There is a way to take your life into your control without trying to read it like a fairytale. Be the love that you seek to find. Be the person that you seek to find. And in this way, you will inevidably GIVE to others yourself which is the same as what you are looking for... and thereforeeee what you are looking for will come back to you. What we believe we experience (if you believe you must wait, you will ALWAYS be waiting) What goes around comes around (life gives to the giver- to the selfless. You only want love for selfish reasons. There are other ways to find yourself) Love of others is not what makes us breath for they will come and go. In the end, there is only yourself... and then there is God. In the end, that is all that will be too. So find REALLY what's important to you- what you must work on to gain all else THEN you will be complete
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