cremebrulee

Thanks Raingate! I can't believe what the government will approve! They shouldn't be selling it. I just read somewhere that of 1000 women tested that were taking the drug when they became pregnant 800 of them gave birth to severely deformed babies... why are they still prescribing it. Very scary. I was given a topical gel called eurycene but it's not working. I have just ordered some Proactiv which is supposed to be great and has that benzyl peroxide in it so fingers crossed that helps. Mine are cystic too but no-one in my family has ever has a single pimple so it can't be genetic. I never realized how much it shatters your self-confidence. when i was in my early 20's i was doing catwalk modelling and phtographic work, approaching 30 i was very comfortable with my appearance (even though i am a little rounder these days), but now i feel like a troll. I'll have to find a good dermatologist and just try everything available. Something has to work eventually. Thanks for your responses.

The carmen electra fit to strip is quite good. Although the first time you watch it it seems like they are just tiny little routines that won't do any good, trust me.... you can feel it the next day. I wouldn't say it is high on the cardio but it is great for the legs and butt. I don't like many of the other DVD's, would prefer to go do a class somewhere. Bellydancing or salsa are great for everything!

In my opinion your sisters action constitutes abuse. She manipulated you into doing something you were not comfortable with. Being the older one she was way out of line and i think you should discuss this with an older relative (or a counsellor at school if you're not comfortable mentioning it to family at the moment). Especially if she is talking about wanting to do this again. If you were both really young and inexperienced and just wanted to make sure you were not a terrible kisser before starting to date maybe you could let it slide just once, but she is in her 20's, it was wrong for her to put you in that situation. I would talk to her about it first, make it clear that you are not comfortable with it and that you felt manipulated. If she persists then definitely talk to a relative.

I have had microderm-abrasion facials in the past when i had clear skin (it is supposed to be great to refine the pores etc) but i have quite sensitive skin so it made my face quite red and you need at least 8 treatments at $120 each so its a bit expensive. It is just so frustrating as no-one in my family has ever had skin trouble and i am the only one in my family and my social network that has developed it. The doctor can't give me any reason other than that it is common in women and it is usually hormonal. I heard about something called accutane but the side effects sound a little too scary for me! i've gone from feeling good about myself most of the time and only hating my thighs... to feeling like a troll and trying to hide myself in public. It doesn't help that i am single and 30 and wanting to settle down eventually.... i kind of need my normal face back to get the husband

I am almost 30 and have never had a single pimple in my entire life. My flawless skin was the only part of me that i could always count on to look good and i always felt good about my skin. About 8 weeks ago i started getting really big red pimples on my throat, they never get a white or black head in them they just get this big round lump under the skin that will not go away. I still have the ones that appeared 8 weeks ago and now i am getting more and more of them on my jaw and now a couple on my cheeks. My doctor says it is adult acne and it is quite common but i don't know anyone with adult acne and the topical gel prescribed does nothing . I have tried all the natural remedies (tea tree, witchhazel, lime oil, honey, garlic), i have tried increasing certain vitamins like zinc etc to boost my body internally. Nothing is working. Does anyone have any tips on getting rid of these big cyst type acne pimples without ending up with little mounds of scar tissue everywhere on my face?? It is getting to the point now where i don't want to leave the house anymore and i almost end up in tears everytime i look in the mirror. I don't drink, smoke, do drugs, wear make-up (other than mascara) and i don't eat fast food or anything high in saturated fats so i don't know how i can get this all of a sudden for no reason. It is really frustrating. I am about to spend money i don't have on proactiv but i really hate using chemical/synthetic cleansers.... almost everything i use is organic. I even went back on the contraceptive pill because i was told that can help clear the skin but it is just getting worse. Dont know what to do anymore! Any ideas from fellow sufferers?

A little confused as to what to do about this situation. After coming out of a serious committed relationship (i.,e. engagement) all my friends were telling me that I should just go out and have a fling with someone that I like, even if it was only one night…… their idea of moving on I have only ever been in 2 long term serious relationships and didn't really date in-between, and have never casually dated. But I hooked up with someone I had known for 5 years and who knew my relationship style. I don't know whether it happened because I was at a vulnerable stage right after my break-up and he used it to his advantage or if it was my friends idea of moving on that let me go down that road, but it was only one night and then I decided not to pursue it any further and write it off as a mistake. i have never done anything like that before and probably never will again. I figured that because I had known this guy for years and been friends and work colleagues in the past that he would have the decency and respect to be discreet…. But I just heard from someone at my old office (who I still have business dealings with) that there is a rumour flying around about me and this guy and now a bunch of guys from the office are asking me out (obviously because they think I'm some kind of easy target). I don't know the specifics of the rumour and I tried to call the guy once to ask his side but he didn't respond to the call. I am furious because I still have contact with all these people that are hearing the rumour and laughing at it (and most likely passing it on at the water cooler to everyone else). Not only is this damaging to my reputation which was squeaky clean up til now but it could potentially damage my future business dealings as I will not want to deal with this firm in the future or regain employment there. My gut instinct is to just ignore this and tell people that if they believe what gets said then bollocks to them but I also have a fear that the rumour is negative or more detailed than I would like (or god forbid secretly taped or something awful like that). The fact that someone I knew betrayed and disrespected me is bad enough but how do I deal with all my business associates (including some that are personal friends and some that know my ex-partner) buying into all of this gossip and laughing behind my back. I've never been good with embarrassment (I'd prefer to move to another country) but as much as I'd like to rip someone's head off over this I am unsure what the best course of action is, if any. Any advice?? Anyone else out there experienced something similar??

Hi everyone I would love to hear from anyone who has or has had meniere's or long term vertigo... anyone who has had long term dizziness. I have had severe dizziness for 2 years (undiagnosed for a long time now diagnosed as meniere's with a touch of CFS thrown in). I would like to hear from people that have had something similar and find out how others have dealt with this and managed it to maintain their independance. I had a corporate job and a busy life before this and now i cant work and feel like i'm a little kid dependant on others again. So hate that! It is always helpful to her others stories that relate in someway and hear about their journey. Thank you and good health and happiness to you all.

smallworld is spot on. writing is a great outlet. It is really tough to let go of all the dreams you created with that person in mind. I just spent 4 years with a guy i've known for 8 years, we were shopping for engagement rings and out of the blue he sends me a text message to say he's leaving me and refused to say why, then in the space of a week changed his number, moved house, changed his job and has not considered anyones feelings other than his own. Just like yours he was mr sweetheart all the way through up to the last day we were together, no indication that there was any problems at all. It is very confusing i know. Especially when you know that they are a jerk but still get cut when you see them with another girl. It definitely takes time to fall out of love with someone but there will come a time when you couldn't care less what he is doing or who he is dating. It is a slow process but smallworlds idea is great, write it all down. when you're feeling sad about it all just think of all the cruel things that were said or done. In time you will look back and realise that he didn't deserve you and you can and will have a better future.

I wasn't in a real relationship until i was 22. i started actively looking at 19 but that old saying is true, you end up meeting someone when you're not looking for anyone. I was just focused on my life and what i enjoyed doing. I don't smoke or drink or go clubbing and although that can be a little limiting socially, there is no point in being someone that you're not in order to find someone. I concentrated on work and study and my friends, did yoga and kickboxing, went swimming at the beach and then i met someone out of the blue while ordering dinner at a takeaway on my way home from work. He was the chef there and every time i went back he talked to me and after a month or so we started dating. It all happens when you least expect it. Try to find things that you enjoy doing alone and you might meet someone there that has similar interests. you can meet people in the most unlikely places sometimes.

I've tried most of them. Natural, Standard Bikini Wax, Brazillian Bikini Wax, Hollywood wax and post-hollywood wax. Personally i find brazillian the most comfortable for me, my partner doesn't care which i have as long as it's clean & tidy. Definitely prefer to wax (even though more costly) as shaving doesn't last long, gets itchy, more prone to razor burn etc...

Some guys don't care about it, others are completely grossed out by it. It is never a good idea on the first few days as it is always much heavier (maybe just have shower sessions during this time), but when the flow is lighter there is nothing wrong with it at all. Perhaps just put a towel down though as you can end up with some unattractive stains on the bedsheets otherwise. I think it's perfectly fine as long as both parties are comfortable.

Night school would be a good place to start. But i think before you decide on an exact career area to focus on you should maybe go and do a weeks work experience in the field so you can get a feel for it and be sure it's what you're interested in. There's nothing worse than going through all the schooling and starting the job and realising its not what you really expected. I think it is a great idea to work with teens in any capacity especially if you have had a troubled upbringing because then you can relate to what the kids are going through and be better equipped to help them in dealing with their problems. It would probably give you a lot more passion for the job aswell. It would most likely pay less than the average job (as all jobs that involve helping others do), but i think the emotional reward would be enough to compensate. Do some research on the areas you are interested in and what you need to achieve your objective. There are lots of positions that involve this type of work - school counsellor, youth services worker, case workers with social services child division etc... Find out what you're passionate about and go for it. It is never too late.

I think it depends on the ex and the reason for breaking up. I know that there is absolutely no way i could get back together with my last ex-boyfriend because there would be no trust between us, it would never ever work. But i am currently with an ex from 7 years ago and our relationship now is better than it ever was back then. Although it was sad to break up with him before, it wasn't over something horrible like infidelity or a massive blow-up of an argument, i didn't want to break up the first time but i understood why we had to.... he was not ready to grow up and i was, he still wanted to go and party hard and be young and irresponsible. Now after 7 years, a couple of relationships and a child on his side he is a lot more mature and settled and we find that we have much more in common now and get along much better. We have been together for over a year now and, apart from some minor hiccups recently, all has been going very well. You have to assess whether you are truly over what happened to cause the break-up and whether things have changed enough to move forward. I think there is always residual emotions and desires for exes so it is easy to feel attracted and close to someone you were once intimate with. Just guard yourself and be sure you want it to progress for the right reasons. There is no reason not to have hope as anything can happen in life. Good Luck! I hope it all works out well for you.

I know what you mean! It always seems to work out that way. Maybe it's because when we are with someone we don't notice all the other men because we're too wrapped up in the one we have. Then the one you want/have tears your heart out and you feel you have nothing to give anyone and don't want any men in your life... that's when we notice all the others that were probably there all along. Very annoying! My partner says it's usually the other way around for him and his friends. No girls approach them or seem interested until they are in a good stable relationship with someone they care about then they have women throwing themselves at them and giving out their number weird!

Every woman is unique and will feel pleasure in different ways. This is a new level of intimacy for you both in your relationship and it may take a little while to be truly relaxed and comfortable with eachother. Things will progress naturally and you will, in time, find which positions are most pleasurable for you. You may find that this position does become more pleasurable over time as you gain confidence in yourself and feel more relaxed with your partner. It all comes naturally and every person has their own style and rhythm. Just relax and enjoy, you will know what you enjoy as time progresses. Congrats on getting to this stage with your partner. Good luck!

my health doesn't really put any strain on us as i am pretty much self-sufficient and financially take care of myself. I always give him his free time to go cycling or to the gym with friends etc... The arguments were over silly things really - he was 2 hours late once and didn't text or call to let me know he'd be late and when he turned up i was pissed off, he explained that his son got dropped off later than usual and he didn't realise the time which i understood but i told him that he should at least text to say he'll be a bit late - in my mind it's just common coutesey to do so. He didn't see it that way and got angry because i was upset over something he doesn't feel is important. It is one issue that came up a lot in our relationship. I worked in an industry where being late to an appointment was considered exceptionally rude and it could cost you the clients respect and their business so for me someone being that late and not even apologizing is disrespectful and rude. Silly thing to argue over i know, but at least it wasn't over who got the last oreo! I think his reaction was a little too harsh but what's done is done. He's a bit all over the place at the moment... one day he is really nice and says that he is sure we can work things out then the next day he says that things cant go back to the way they were and if we tried it would turn out the same way in the end. I feel that he doesn't really know what he feels or wants right now. I know deep down he cares a lot for me (says he never loved anyone the way he loved me and is so upset that we aren't the way we were) but i think he is trying to switch off so he doesn't feel anything and cant get hurt. ???? Men are so confusing at times!

Sorry! I guess there would be girls out there that would do the same thing. I just would never do that and i have known a lot of guys that have done similar things and thought nothing of it and wondered why their girls got upset with them.... Girls can be equally mean i suppose.

sorry... i should have given a bit more background info for those that didn't see my last post. We were organising our engagement party in december and we had a few minor arguments during december/january so he decided he wanted to cancel everything and go back to seeing eachother less often. I felt very loved and had a lot of affection but now there is not much of that at all and he says he just doesn't feel like being that way at the moment. He says he doesn't want to see other women and doesn't want me to date other men. He wants to chill out and see how things go. He put things off because he said things felt "right" before but they stopped feeling right and he doesn't want to continue the way things were until it feels "right" again (i think he expects perfection). I know he has been hurt in the past and the situation reminded him of a past event but i have had to overcome my past hurts and get over all the reminders that i have seen. I am not much of a casual dater and i have had 2 long term serious relationships with nothing in-between, i can't be with someone that i am not wholeheartedly in love with and even to be attracted to someone physically is rare for me. I just don't know if i should be waiting for the man i love or trying to find someone new. I know that things with him will progress again eventually but i am finding it very difficult to go from full-on involvement with every aspect of his life to no involvement other than hooking up for coffee and a movie. It is hard to have what i thought would be my family taken away from me. I want to have faith and trust that it will all work out well and he just needs time. Some days i am positive about it all and just relax and let things be as they are, but then i get days where it hurts like hell and i text and he sends a cold reply or says he cant see me for 3 days and i get more upset. I just want things to go back to being like they were before december, i finally had everything i wanted in life (except for my health which is still a bit of an issue) and now i have nothing again. NB: The health concern i have had for 3 years and it is not a factor in our relationship at all it just puts limits on me personally so i can't really go out and about by myself and do my own thing - i think that's why it's makes this really difficult to deal with. I'm also back living with my mother who drives me mad (as mothers do) and when i'm stuck at home with her knowing he has the day off work but wont visit because his son is there i feel really depressed and left out.

It is true that having step-children is very rewarding but it can also be very demanding to have an instant family that aren't yours and if you break up later down the line it can lead to more pain because you lose the kids that you bonded with too. If you are both going through a divorce then you definitely need to take things slowly but you also have to consider the fact that she may not want any more children in the future. Could you handle not having children of your own? If you really want to have a family of your own then continuing with her may not be the best for you. 4 weeks is very early to know whether she really is the woman of your dreams. Perhaps just ease things up a bit, let her know how you feel about the situation, find out how she feels about the situation too. Don't make any decisions until you know in your heart what you really want.

An update on my last post.... I have gone from seeing my partner every day to twice a week and from seeing his son 3 times a week to not at all (all my partners decision). I have backed off and given him his space and although he is now a little more affectionate again he is still being very cold and distant. He was being very friendly and coming over a bit more often but then i invited him and his son to a free symphony in the park (only 1 hour of his time) and he declined saying that he has made a decision not to involve me with his son anymore and that he will not be doing anything like that with me so forget it. I had a very strong bond with him and his child and was about to become his step-parent so not seeing him for almost 2 months is hurting like hell and my partner is just shutting me out and acting like we have broken up and will never be together again even though we are still dating. I'm starting to feel like he's pushed me onto the sidelines and i don't know what to do about it. I love him and his son very much, they are my family, and i want things to go back to what they were like before but he won't budge an inch. I don't want to break up and date other people but i am starting to feel that he will never try to get us back on track. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks

I agree with silvermanic. A card to let her know how much you care is the best for now. I just separated from my partner 4 weeks ago (his decision though) and although i would love to go out with him on valentines day i know that if i push the issue he will back off even more. It is hard to give the person space when you don't want to be away from them but its the only thing you can do. Respect her space, let her know you care but don't push for anything more.

I agree with DN. A medical problem should be left to the experts to advise on. It could be something very simple but only your doctor will be able to figure that out for you. Self-diagnosing on the internet can be a dangerous thing because the symptoms could be part of a huge number of illnesses and you don't want to be convinced you have some nasty disease when it is probably nothing major. Get to the doctor for a checkup, be open and honest about what you experience when the spells come on and they will help you find the cause and solution. Good luck!

Reading any non-fiction i can find. Listening to music. Watching corny sitcoms and great foreign films. Cooking anything sweet and yummy. sitting by the water watching the sun dance over the waves. I usually prefer to spend my time hanging out with my partner but when i'm single or alone all the above are my favourite things to do.

Yes i would have been bothered by that too. He should have had the courtesy to let you know beforehand that his past girlfriends might attend so at least you were aware in advance. I think it is possible that he is just on friendly terms or maybe he just invited everyone he's ever met so his first gig would get a good crowd. It is most likely nothing to worry about - he probably just did a typical guy thing and forgot to consider the girls feelings in a situation like that.

from my experiences i would say this is a line. I think that a guy saying he likes a girl but doesn't want a relationship at the moment is kind of a nice way of saying you're nice but i'm not that into you. He may genuinely like the girl in a non-romantic way but i think its just a way for them to ease out of it.