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annie24

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Everything posted by annie24

  1. annie24
    Well... just take things slow. Like kskm said, love is about taking chances. Instead of worrying if he's going to hurt you, think more along the lines of "hmmm.... is this the right guy for me? does he make me happy?" Just get to know him...if he suggests a relationship, give it a shot. how wonderful!!!! Good luck!
  2. annie24
    Well gosh - if he's making you this happy, then yes, go for it! You know, it's so hard to find someone that your really connect with - that "click" is rare. It doesn't happen every day.
  3. annie24
    Well... Maybe I'm alone in feeling this way, but I don't think you owe the ex anything. It was his choice to break up with you, so you shouldn't keep letting him stand in the way of your happiness by remaining "loyal" or whatever to this man who broke your heart 7 months ago. Well, that's how I feel. It may put a strain on their friendship, but that's their problem, not yours. Maybe I'm just less jealous or less possessive than most people, but my best friend has started dating a man I used to go out with a few years ago, and it doesn't bother me in the least. I figure, what's over is over, everyone's moved on. If he makes my best friend happy, that is great, and I wish them happiness.
  4. annie24
    Hehehe... I have a somewhat similar situation. I say, go for the friend. Your ex broke up with you 7 months ago. I think more than enough time has passed, and since he broke up with you, it's fair game. Spend some more time with the friend. Good luck!
  5. annie24
    Erm... yeah. This is one of the creepier things I've read in a while. Even today, in some cultures, being with your cousin is ok. It's actually legal in many US states to marry your cousin also. Well, I think her behavior is inappropriate, especially because she's the cousin! She's acting like she's the gf! eewwww.... I think you should talk to him, and tell him you think this behavior is inappropriate on so many different levels, but like the others said, I doubt this will change. You may have to break up with him.
  6. annie24
    Well, I too, have heard that some women continue to get their period throughout their pregnancy, but it is so extremely rare, from what I've read, it almost seems like an urban legend. Some women have light bleeding during the first few months of pregnancy. Here's a link that appears to have some reputable info: link removed In any case, your doctor is the right person to consult. He or she can give you a definitive answer to if you're pregnant or not.
  7. annie24
    Well, first off, don't send anymore e-mails until we here ok it first Next, maybe you should read some books to get things back under control, like, "Why people don't heal." Or something like that by Caroline Myss. Another one is "Never be lied to again" by David Lieberman. I don't know.... go blow $100 at Borders, find a bunch of books that may help you center yourself. I'm reading Deepak Chopra's "The Book of Secrets" right now - I'm enjoying it. It has some interesting things to think about.... Oh yea, and to get your anger out, take up kickboxing or something like that at the gym.....
  8. annie24
    er.... well buddy... this is 100% your decision to make.... whichever one you think you'd be better off with..... good luck!
  9. annie24
    OOOoohhhh!!! I like the new avatar....!
  10. annie24
    Oh good!!!! I'm glad you got it back!!!! Yes, a breakup, especially that of a marriage, must be one of the most stressful things in life....
  11. annie24
    OH NOOOOO!!!!!! *sigh* I hope you get the stuff back!
  12. annie24
    He won't forget about you, you're not easily forgotten But, if he does, do you really want to be with a man who can forget 2 years so easily? Well, if you don't push him away, I'm sure he'll e-mail you or call you once every few weeks from CA just to say hi. During those phone calls, you have to be as light and happy as possible. Still, 1 year is a long time to wait for him to fall for you again....
  13. annie24
    Wow, Ms. Ice! I am impressed!!! It seems like it took a lot of self-restraint, but it all worked out for the best! Cool! Thanks for sharing that inspiring story.
  14. annie24
    Ah yes, I agree the date one is the one to read.
  15. annie24
    Good morning! Wow, you've got quite the reading list compiled! Yes, read both the venus and mars books. The original one, and the "Mars and Venus on a date." I feel that the original one seems more directed at married couples, wheras the dating one is talking about the issues that unmarried couples face, you know, before they've made the committment to each other. I like how the book organizes the stages of dating: Attraction, uncertainty, exclusivity, intimacy, engagement. Remember, he broke up with you, so he's actually back at stage zero (as in, no relationship). But sometimes, when he calls you, he may be in stage 1, you know, like when you first meet someone, you call, talk on the phone, etc. But then, you're acting like you're in a later stage like exclusivity or engagement, and you scare him off! So he retreats back to stage 0 (as in, no relationship!) Here is an excerpt from Mars and Venus on a Date: Compound this with the fact he's moving soon.... I can see why he would want to run away.
  16. annie24
    Perfect. You did everything just perfectly. Congrats!!!
  17. annie24
    there's nothing wrong with you. You're just still in love with him. I promise that when you read the book, you may have a better understanding of what is going on in his head. If you want to move on from him, or if you want him back, the thing you have to do is exactly the same: detach! Remember when we talked about how the guy you don't want was offering to install your A/C? See... you went off, had a fun weekend, that was when J called. That was a good beginning, but, you have to continue that! It's not over yet - he's not back to you. He'll only be back to you when or if he says the words, "Let's get back together." Until then, you have to keep being elusive, happy, busy. Either you will win him back, or you will move on, but being happy and busy will get you there. Yes, even though you dated for 2 years, you are back at square 1 with him. I know this all sounds like a game, because it partially is. You have to play hard to get. Make him wonder who you're hanging out with and how much fun you're having. Make him wonder if other guys are pursuing you. Ok, don't nobody bash me please. Gradle, have you read "The Rules?" I know, very strict, very old-fashioned, but I think it's what will help you the most in this case. The Venus and Mars books will explain the why, and the Rules will explain how to act. *sigh* good luck and have a good night!
  18. annie24
    Yes, if you want to ask out a man, you've got to be direct and charming. For example, remember when you were a little girl, and you wanted your older cousin or uncle to take you to get candy? And you'd say, "Let's go get candy!!!" in your cutest voice. You demanded it, and you know they'd say yes. So, when you ask out a guy, be like, "Saturday night! I have tickets to that show!! Let's go, handsome!" Be direct, quick, and charming. If you stutter like, "uhhh... hi... how are you... uh... how's your sis.... I was wondering.... like.... if you're not busy or you don't have anything else to do.... let's uhhhh... hang out." Which one do you think would work better?
  19. annie24
    Ok - what you have to do is back away completely! No more butting into his business. When you talk to him, be nice, talk about general things. Let him volunteer what he's been up to. There's nothing you can do to make him take you back. He'll take you back only on his own accord. If you've said everything, and nothing has worked, then the only thing left is to completely back off and let him bring up relationship issues with you. You just have to be light and breezy whenever you run into him. Good luck!
  20. annie24
    Yes yes yes. Read the book - it may give you a better insight as to what's going on in his head. When he asks you what you've been up to - just tell him you've been having loads of fun. Everything is wonderful and exciting! NO NO NO mentioning of the relationship, or if he misses you. From now on... you HAVE TO DO THIS!!! You may not speak to him on the phone for more than 10 minutes when he calls. You have to go and meet some friends, or you have somewhere you need to be or whatever. He has to miss you and know that you're not sitting around waiting for him. Trust me, that will only make you look more attractive. Yes, you are right - relationships require work. The work on your part is that you have to make him miss you again, and remember that fun, independent woman he fell for. You must make him forget about the clingy gradle he broke up with. Honestly, yes, if you keep this up, you will push him away forever. That's why you have to stop.
  21. annie24
    Oh gradle..... you started your weekend off so well! *sigh* When he calls to say hi, your only job is to be light and breezy. He needs to miss you - when you start pushing him for more, he gets scared that this may not be the right relationship for him and he starts to back away. This is why you must, at this stage, let him do all the persuing and the one to bring up relationship issues. I want you to do some reading. I'm reading it right now as a refresher: "Mars and Venus on a Date" by John Gray, PhD. I think it's a really good book, and it talks about the stages of attraction and relationships that men and women go through. By breaking up, J pulled back into an earlier relationship stage, and you need to also. You tell him that you're sure that he's the one for you. He isn't sure that you're the one for him, he feels pressured, and is afraid to hurt you, so he pulls back. But, when you're not acting like you're sure he's right for you, he feels more comfortable with making advances towards you. Give him ALL the space in the world. Remember - you are the special one - he should be pursuing you, not the other way around. Read the book this week - I think you'll find it very insightful.
  22. annie24
    Well, she's obviously close with her parents, but that doesn't answer the question of whether or not she's interested in you.... And if she's shy... I don't see why she would keep talking to you. Doesn't it seem like the shy type would rather run away?
  23. annie24
    Is she leaving the shop only, or is she also moving far away? You know, last year, this guy from one of my classes asked me out for a saturday night. I turned him down because my mom and I were going to the symphony that night (The Truth!!!) My mom came from out of state to visit me, and I got tickets for us. And, actually, I wasn't interested in him, so no, I didn't make a counter-offer. But since, I've also tried to avoid him. If I see him around, I don't talk to him, or I might say hi, but that's it. So, what this girl is doing with her flirtiness, I don't know. Either she's reconsidered, or she's toying with you.
  24. annie24
    Well, if it's not going to affect how you feel about her, then don't ask. Besides, I don't think that anyone in history has actually revealed their "real" number to a partner. (Well, ok, I'm sure that some people have told their real number, but most haven't... )
  25. annie24
    Well, here's the thing, she may have reconsidered since the last time you asked her out. If she keeps asking you that, it seems like she's "fishing" for you to ask her out on the date. Now, I'm not sure, but if you've been hung up on her for 1 year and haven't been able to move on, I think it may be good just to ask her out one more time, and if she says no again, then forget about her forever.
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