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Ated

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  1. Ated
    I'm just wondering, how do u just stop loving someone?? There are a lot of people here that would want to know the strategy. So far, i've been collecting bits and pieces from what ppl have adviced me to do. These are: 1) Keep busy, do things to go out of your ex's way to make sure that you don't bump into each other and not open all wounds. Consequently, you have time to heal. 2) Don't go finding out things about him. Will also open all wounds. 3) And the so famous NC, which applies to both... Antyhign else. I mean, I've tried this and i'm sure u have. I just wanna get out of thw square TOTALLY now. I want to make sure that if i bump into him or when i hear about him, it would'nt bother me at all. I just wanna close that part of my heart, if i could, i would cut it! Also a part of my brain. hehe i just wanna DELETE HIM! Basically, pretend he never came in my life, never met him. So to say, REBOOT me... Thanks. I'd really appriciate your verdicts and inputs!
  2. Ated
    Hey... Thanks. I know ur absolutely correct! All i want id for him to just apologise or wataver. Recognise that what he did was wrong and learn from it too. I know that the chances of that happening is probably slim to none. More to none! lol *sigh* I just wish i would fall out of love with him! how do i do so? I cared so much... i can't just STOP caring like he did. any suggestion>?? P.S I do go out and keep busy. In fact, even if he was to come back and we were on good teerms. HELL no i wouldnt say say cos of my circumstances. I just want to focus my love on me. I never really did that and only am starting to!
  3. Ated
    ABSOLUTELY! My attitude is: "So what you dumped me? I'm glad it happened! You did me a favour! Say thanks to your new gf, now you're her problem!" The way i see it. i didnt lose anything, in fact i gained something! Experience, i love myself better. In fact, ive lost a few kgs and is now getting a lot of attention. IF he does come back... all i have to say is "Thanks for the apology, but i've moved on. U told me to..." and then walk outta there saying... "TOO BAD you can't get a piece of this anymore! SUFFER! " So to you guys. Show him what he missed out on. Make him go nuts! Reverse the situation and gain power on your own! LET"S DO THIS! If you ever need to vent, just say it! We're here to listen.
  4. Ated
    Thanks. But this seriously isn't easy. That is why i posted this. For other's who are going through the same experience, let's motivate each other! Keep each other standing! Like, right now for example, Im sad... i dunno i just feel upset. Im thinking about his new gf. How can he replace me so eaasily? But let's burn the memories. They are just that. MEMORIES> I know we we'll never be the same...
  5. Ated
    I mean that from a guy's perspective too. I dunno actually, now its late... i can't sleep... Soemthing is bothering me and i dunno what it is! Hey dude, we can do this togetehr ok? Motivate each other! Keep our heads up. This too shall pass!
  6. Ated
    Thanks girl! I just wanna make a revolution! hahaa No serious tho. We give our heart on a plate and the guy is an idiot! We should never ever settle for second best! I hate MEN who are insensitive and think they are all taht! God girls! WE ROCK! No man should treat us in any way BAD!
  7. Ated
    Hey virus... Im sorry. I dindt mean to sound conceited. But the thing is, this guy put me trhough HELL. He was really heartless... and i had to be his dorr mat. I dun wanna explain it. im tired of talking about him. But, seriosuly, i am not up-myself! :S:S I was "TOO NICE"...
  8. Ated
    Just wanna shout out! Today, i say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! I will not be my ex-bf's door mat! I will not give him the satisfaction of feeding on my hurt and pain! I will not prolong this hurt anymore! I can't take his bovine fecal excuses and i will get over him. I will take it day by day! And i will get through this! I have to! Today, I stop being the victim. I'm gonna pick myself up and be the bigger person. If in the case I see him with his girl, I will be polite and say hello but leave it at that! This man is not worthy of my great love. I will find someone who will treat me good and love me for the way I am. "Find someone who loves you, cos I'm so far away from you..." he says. Well honey, in reply I say... "I will you loser! I'm not your part-time girl. I'd rather be alone than be emotionally abused! For anyone who is going through a break-up, and trying to move on... WE CAN DO THIS! And it will start today!
  9. Ated
    Im sooo happy for u.
  10. Ated
    I hope he wants me back.... But actually, i sorta hope he doesnt. Cos he hurt me big time. I dunno? why do guys act sooo mean?!?! When we brok eup he said some HARSH stuff... so when i hear about this girl thats got similar features as me and he wears the ring i find it a bit odd and suprising. Do you thik he really meant all the "i have no feelings for . i regret going out with u" stuff? He was REALLY harsh...! so i dunno whther this girl is a rebound and the ring (maybe he just really likes it) I'd like your 2 cents!
  11. Ated
    i know what you are saying rmanaudio! That's why u must KNOW how i feel. I just CARE for him soo much. Not necessarily as a gf type. But i was really attached to him. and i just worry for his wellbeing. Im that type pf person. My personality type is ESFJ. the "caregivers" thats why its so hard for me to adjust cos i'm like THIS! caring! Pls help me. Im seriosuly ging crazy. I think i need some serious counselling... ARGH help
  12. Ated
    hahh ATED says have a BONFIRE! haha!
  13. Ated
    Thanks so much... Thing is, i gav him EVERYTHING! and he replaces me sooo quickly. It makes me feel sooo low, worthless. I dunno... His friends (mutual friends) asked him why we broke up, and he just said we argued too much. ?? I never cheated on him. I've always been true... I just wanna show im a bigger person u know? I wanna tell that girl "thanks for makin ghim YOUR problem now!" hehe Sometimes i just wish it was so easy. I wish i could fast forward in the future. It hurts to see him doing this to himself. ANd i KNOW he ain't worth my time. just because EVERYONE said so! lol Hmm you're right. It is his life and i know that. I just wish he would see that i truly cared for him. So should i apply NC including to HIS friends (whcihc is sorta mutual friends) :S Any input will b great. Sometimes i just need to hear what i already know...
  14. Ated
    hey he's got a new gf... apparently, she's got my frame and height? What could this mean. ALso, he is wearing the ring that i bought for him everyday? is that any sign?? I still care for him (i realise that now) altough i wouldn't get back with him, i still worry about him. I heard he goes clubbing EVERY week with this girl (and other friends) and he drinks sooo much he trhows up on the streets... (YUCK). He even lost his phone on the taxi (maybe he was too drunk to realise it feel off his pocket)... I dunno i really dunno why i feel the way i do. can someone tell me?
  15. Ated
    My ex and i broke up 3 months ago, maybe four... I havent seen or contacted him for the whole time (maybe we spoke like 2 times during the 3 period but all screaming). Anyway, just as i was getting my life back in place, (getting good grades, getting my driver's licence, going out with friends) he comes into my life?! Well, not in MY life but all of a sudden, i bump into him like a lot. I bumped into him like 3 times last week! Anyhoo, i find out that he has a new gf now. And they've been together for a motnh. That would mean that he PRACTICALLY brok eup wth me for this girl. His reason was "i gotta focus on studies, cultural difference, age gap, ur too restrictive, i just wanna have fun!" ya da yada yada... Anyway, as soon as he was in the picture all of a sudden agian, i started to think about him again, and all wounds opened. DAMMIt~! And when i found out about the new gf, i cried for the first time after sooo long (seeing as tho i havent seen him -- Outta sight, outta mind) Its not like i go places to see him, it just so happens that he works near where i live and that he goes to the uni wehre my friends and i hang out. MY POINT IS: I saw him not too long ago, and I ACTUALLY talked to him after all the pain he put me through... and when i asked him (i probably shouldn't have) if he was dating someone, he said no! So he lied! Anyway... my question is... when we were going out, he said that he's lost the ring i gave him. BUt now, he wears it all the time (everyday i heard) and he 'found' it all of a sudden? Strange. Also, his new gf has the same frame as me and the same height> What does this mean?!? Do you think he is serious with this girl? or is she most probably a rebound?? I dunno! But apparently, they walk miles apart and they look like they're just friends cos when they go clubbing... they just dance with every girl and guy. Another thing, i heard that alcohol makes u think about memories, seeing as tho he's occupied with this NEW girl? does that mean he doesn't think about me? I heard that he's REALLY going downhill. and i wish he wouldnt. He would drink off his face and throw up while wlking in the streets. YUCK! and the issue of smoking it makes me sad.... Sorry if this is long. Im just so confused? i dunno why i carea bout him so much... Please any comments will be greatly Greally appriciated. GUYS AND GIRLS thanks!
  16. Ated
    hey man... just checking to see how u doin?? Getting better? Hope so!
  17. Ated
    I noticed nearly all your post have SOOOO many replies! Pretty popular huh?? QS tho~ Why do u have such a strong stand in this?? I mean, its good, but just my curiosity! Too bad im in Australia~
  18. Ated
    I would give him another chance if he was GENUINE> my motto is: "First chances are given, second chances are EARNED and thirs chances do NOT exist!" WEll, if he is willing to earn it then sure, go for it, but as muneca said, take your time.
  19. Ated
    I would say no. But if he was willing to prove himself to you how much he DOES TRULY love YOU, then he would dump the other girls and be with you. Although i wouldn't personally give this PLAYER~ a chance... it is all up to you. But i think that if u stay with him, he will think that you're ok with what he's doing and will mistreat you even further. Please move on, i think it is for the best. Plenty of fish in the see hon. Don't EVER settle for second best! You deserve someone better! Besides, your age difference... He can do things behind your back so easily!
  20. Ated
    Hey amy... I just turned 17 in may 30... and my ex broke up wit me in april. We were togetehr for a year and a half, and known him for 2 years. He was very emotionally abusive and trust me, i KNOW it hurts. What people have been advising me to do is, that... "learn from your mistake". I know that it hurts when ppl say "ur too young and you dunno anything about relationships..." Thats not what we need right now... The thing is tho, they are right. I think it is wrong that they say that, but it is true. Lastly, as mentioned in other posts, DO NOT HATE URSELF> What yoou can do is have a 'make-over' a NEW AND IMPROVED U! Make ur ex sorry for dumping you! Show him it is his loss and not yours. Have a "You can't have a piece of this sweet cake anymore!" Have the last laugh... as j-lo says "I had enough of being there for u, now im laughing while you play the fool!" Beat him at his own game. Besides, his actions just shows his maturity level! such a turn off sometimes hehe
  21. Ated
    As much as i hate to admit, I think that i too am an "Obsessive lover". I get sooo posessive. I mean, when he's free, i'd want him to spend it with me... and i get angry when he comes to one of our dates, LATE, but when he's gonna go clubbing with his friends, he can't be late. He has to go NOW. Now even walk me home (at night)! Gee, what an idiot i was. Still, i'm hurt... its been 4 months now nearly. We broke up cos he felt "restricted" and i "mother" him?? Again, i do admit that i am the JEALOUS type... and POSSESIVE, but is THAT crazy?! :S I just think g/f should be second priority. First family and studies, then gf. I think gf more than 'new' friends...
  22. Ated
    Well, it helps knowing your not alone right?? just wish i could do more to help you. But ULTIMATELY, this test is yours...
  23. Ated
    Oh gosh, do i feel you man! I know exactly what u mean. It's been 3.5 - 4 months that ive been out of a nearly 2 years relationship, and the break up was because of that! Saturday nights... He won't spend it with me... He spent less and less time with me since he met his new friends and now part of the 'gang' u know?? POTHEADS! To answer your question, just hang out with other friends... that's what i did and it helps. Although, someitmes, even when im out, i still can't help but wonder what he's up to. Well, i found out just yesterday that apparently, he's got a new gf. Just imagine how i feel! Oh well, the way i see it, what can i do!? So what? ill go to places where he goes and look at him having a good time with a girl?! I dont think so! Even I'm not ready to date, i think now that you knwo that, you shouldn't too. Not til' ur ready. Firstly, you will enjoy ur time more, and secondly, you won't hurt your 'date'. Hope that helps...
  24. Ated
    Wow! Ur sleek I think i'm crushing on you Outlaw! I think your cute! But yes, my ex was such a scumbag. He even told me he can't be with me EVER again because he promised his parents! WHAT THE?!
  25. Ated
    Well Ive been dumped too... My ex dumped me for his stoner friends... I actaully saw them last week and i found out TODAY that hes got a new gf He told me he didnt last time we spoke... He was very harsh to me and pretty much told me that he wants to sleep around... Oh well. I do hope that YES
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