Alabama
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My life sucks, because I am too afraid of rejection and shall thereforeeee never be in a relationship.
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Update: Well, she was tired Thursday, so I sent her a message hoping tomorrow would go better. She posted on facebook, saying Thanks. But it got complicated, when Friday night, during an RPG (Dungeon and Dragons) session at one of the student hang out spots on campus, one of my friends says he likes her. On her facebook, it appears that she has known him longer. She was basically nearby, and when I rushed to talk to her, she just said hi, and seemed a little depressed. Our session ended quickly enough and he went to hang out with her. I felt defeated and slept the night away. The next day I talked with my friend and they stayed out until 3 am (I'm an RA, so I had to head back to my dorm by 12am) and they went out to eat and he escorted her back her dorm. She was once again by herself, on Saturday night, and he joined her to hang out with her. I have no idea if she has any interest in him,but I figured I would casually ask on Tuesday. The situation feels even more hopeless, as I learned on Thursday I realized I was a commit a phobe. So, right now, I'm not sure what to do. I figure I'll try to keep busy until then.
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There is this girl in my Political Science class, who I think likes me. Today, while we were looking over something, before class, she just lay her head on my shoulder. I kept reading, and she just said she wanted to gauge my reaction. She did later, too. The class before, she said, "Hey sexy!" Kind of jokingingly, and said she really couldn't keep a straight face. She is very cheerful, and I'm just wondering if I'm mistaking her friendly attitude for something more. I have class again Thursday, so I was going to see if I could notice anything else.
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I think she just needs time to figure things out. She really does love you, by the way she acts around you. But right now, she is very confused and is trying to sort things out in her mind, I am sure. It's best, as you stated, just to give her some space and see how things turn out. Good luck.
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You might not be doing anything wrong at all. Sometimes, we just don't get the chances we want when we're ready to date. I found that when you want to date someone, it is like there is no one out there to date. Yet when, you decide to concentrate on something else, all of a sudden people become available. If you lament and wonder why you're not bein successful attracting someone, than you'll get nowhere; it's best to do something more positive, so you will attract guys who find you interesting and vica versa.
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Shy guys generally try to do what they can, with any chance, to talk with a girl they like. If is true what your saying and he is just asking, than that is a good sign. Do you notice any odd body langauge though? Is he nervous around you at times, does he seem embarrassed at any points? This can also be a good indicator. See if you can't notice any of these signs.
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It's to build it up. Talk to her more, and from as time goes on, notice any body langauge (flirting, sitting really close, staring) to see if she likes you. It's best not to assume anything yet, but try to get the guts to talk with her more on the bus and get to know her. Good luck.
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Sometimes. But I feel it's best just to suck it up and deal with things as best as possible. I exist. Everyone exists. We do not get answers a choice, it is true, to when we would be born or how, or where. But it happens, regardless. I have wanted to disappear at times, and have even imagined what life would be like...but it would be a difficult choice and it feels like I would be leaving everything behind. I can't do that. I guess that is what I love most about life...it's struggle. It's not easy, nor is it hard. It is neither. You are always struggling at some point in life, and sometimes all the time. It makes you stronger, for the better.
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Me, too. I tend to think waayy to much. But it's neccesary as I see it. I want to be a writer, so I have think a lot regardless. I don't think it's unhealthy to think too much. Regardless, if I am to talk with my thoughts outloud, I'll make sure to be alone, as people generally regard it as weird. But it's something we do, so I don't think it's totally unhealthy. Not, at all.
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I too sometimes, hate to play the waiting game. But I realize if I let myself get depressed, wishing I had someone else, wishing for my first kiss already, then I will simply waste my time and energy. We have to be strong and have patience. We must continue with our lives and move forward. That's what I think. Don't worry about not having someone now; enjoy life. They'll come one day, I'm sure of it. Nothing lasts forever.
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I think she just needs to heal first. She still likes you obviously, after your advice and her affection towards it. But it may damage your relationship, if you two decide to jump in one now. I suggest let her heal first, then when she's good and ready, ask her out.
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I'm glad we could help! I hope everything turns out well and good luck!
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What if you died, never having a gf or relationship?
Alabama replied to iwishiknew's topic in Dating Advice
I think I would be a little sad for never having the experience, but still happy I did what I wanted in life. -
He's being cauitious. He obviousely really likes you, if he is going to spend all that money and making sure your okay, when he's not around. He doesn't want to ruin the friendship you have, and just wants to take things slow. But, if you don't want to be in a relationship it is best to say something.
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This is such an easy decision, huh? You're only going to be 20! You'll be still so young, so why give up now? If you do, you'll never get the girlfriend you want, to lose your virginity, too. I'll be in 21 in 2 months, still and virgin and also with no girlfriend. It can be painful because many times the nice guy doesn't seem to have much luck, but don't give up. Change then who you are. Make it this year that you decide to improve your chances with girls. Brush up with some books. Who knows? Maybe the next girl you meet, might just be that virgin your hoping for.
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Good luck the_ironfist! Hope you succeed in getting over your shyness!
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When did it stop being fun and start being scary?
Alabama replied to Baby Carrot's topic in Personal Growth
I'm starting to really wonder that, too. I've only been an adult (according to society) for close to 3 years and it is scary. When your a kid, you don't have these worries about the future, about life and death, or if you will actually survive and succeed in the world. But there comes a time I guess whe you must change, as your enviornment does. Life seems rather scary now, but I welcome the challenge. It is what will make me stronger. -
I've decided this year to attempt to get over my shyness. I have a little experiment of sitting down next to random woman (alone of course and I will ask if I can sit down) and just casually engage them in conversation. In theory this will work, but I'm going to be so nervous when I actually start it..lol.
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Where do you see yourself in five years? Where would you like to be?
Alabama replied to Kevin T's topic in Personal Growth
I hoping in 5 years to become fluent in Japanese and maybe start work as a translator for a company. Also hopefully I'll start searching for a literary agent. Cheers! -
What do you say to someone you haven't talked to in 2 years?
Alabama replied to Alabama's topic in Dating Advice
Well, I emailed her. I basically said that since I got to thinking that it sucked since I was stuck in college and haven't talked with a lot of my friends. I told her I got her contact information for a friend. She emailed me back saying it was good to hear from me and what she was up too. I realize now that even though I have a lot to do this semester, I was either going to email her back or call her, and see if she wants to hang out this summer. It would be a good way to see how she is, and see if she has any interest in me still, too. -
For the past semester, I have had the worst sleeping habits I've had yet. I will sometimes stay up until 5 am in the morning, worrying about the next day, my future, or some other hypothetical thing. I want to sleep better this semester, but are their any techniques that could help me sleep better and not worry so much?
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What do you say to someone you haven't talked to in 2 years?
Alabama posted a topic in Dating Advice
There was this girl that liked me...that was 2 years ago. But it wasn't until a year earlier, I realized I may like her. I asked a friend for some contact information, and got it. Now I can email her or call her. I'ved decided to email...but what do I say? Am I being selfish for wanting a second chance? Or am I giving into desperation, because she is one of the few girls who has actually liked me? I need advice, please. -
I think that is simply the way of things. Society after all simply moves in fluctuations and people will be kind, if they wish to be. I love being kind to people and though it is sad that not all of society is like that, we have to deal with it the best we can. Nothing will last forever of course, and maybe one day society will move forward in it's humanity of ways, but until it does, I'm just going to keep being kind. That's all we can do.
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Well, the Residents moved out of the dorm rooms and have gone home, since finals are over here at my College. A few of the RA's decided to hang out, and even decided to drink. It was just casual, and I hung out with them. I consider them my friends, and am just proud of myself for not drinking. Even though I'll be 21 in about 2 months, I can wait until then, since drinking isn't really a big part of my life and I don't think it will change. I just wanted to post my happinesss, sorry if I bore anyone.
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I'm INFJ. I can't get enough just to take this kind of test. It's fun.