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Thread: Do women like short men who are older? Is there any hope there?

  1. #21
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    Originally Posted by jimthzz
    You could be practical and if on dating sites, always emphasize the positive that you like your women petite. Chase after elves, Leave the vikings to others.
    I probably wouldn't have responded to a profile like that -too objectifying - "healthy and fit" were fine - to me that was more about values, stuff in common - but focus on body type etc was a real turn off for me and I was petite and slim and fit.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
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    I'm 33 and 5'7" / 5'8" depending on the physical. In the "manlet" zone, albeit knowing my luck could be a lot worse. I feel for dudes who are like < 5'4" and not in a conventionally shorter community like the Mexican one I was raised in. I'd imagine it can be rough in the dating scene.

    Personally, I've been directly rejected on account of height on dating sites; usually women who matched me based on photos and didn't read my height prior to messaging. Honestly, it's no big deal and I didn't take it personally. Everyone's got deal breakers. I couldn't date a woman with a gummy smile, so I'm in no position to judge. You've probably got your own arbitrary aesthetic preferences and deal breakers. Where I do think it starts to get shallow is when people try to justify it in some way or speak down on the qualities. It is what it is, and it should be left at just that.

    I don't think anyone's SOL for being "older" and shorter (31 isn't older for anybody when it comes to dating, but especially not a man). If you're in that category where you're at or below the average height of the women in your community, there's no getting around the fact you're gonna have fewer options. Thing is, there's no avoiding that, so there's zero benefit in being jaded or diffident over it. You take what you've got and work with it. Work out, practice good hygiene, wear clothes that fit, get a regular haircut if you're not growing it out like I am. You're looking at a nice salary coming up, which honestly, PC or not to say it, doesn't hurt. Put yourself out there as much as you need to in order to build some confidence. The formula itself isn't that complicated.

    Were my wife tell me tomorrow that she's had enough of me eating Chef Boyarde out of the can and present me with papers, I'm confident I'd still do pretty well in the dating scene.

    ETA: I know you recently posted about that lady you study with, so I don't want "put yourself out there" to be taken the wrong way. Part of it is accepting rejection with poise. Don't persist with women who are clearly not into you or have outright declined your advances. You will (or should) quickly learn how to read signs rather than essentially cold call any woman you find attractive and who happens to have a simple conversation with you.
    Last edited by j.man; 05-08-2020 at 10:58 AM.

  3. #23
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    What is your height?

  4. #24
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    He's 5ft 2 1/2 😑 what's yours?

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  6. #25
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    Originally Posted by Danmarko
    He's 5ft 2 1/2 😑 what's yours?
    I'm 5ft. 8

    I do see quite a few men in my city in that range and they are with partners (Latinos and Italians).

  7. #26
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    Well, I'm a woman and even though I can't speak for all women, most women focus on character and income which are both equally important for obvious reasons. One, you have to actually enjoy being with an emotionally intelligent man who treats you and everyone with respect and empathy and two, most people enjoy a comfortable lifestyle minus financial struggle and hardship.

    Since you've got the income already covered, concentrate on not being self conscious about your height and focus on building your character and personality.

    What people regardless of gender find attractive is self confidence, high self esteem and self security which is non-verbal. Also, being humble is of tantamount importance. You can still be self confident and secure without acting cocky.

    Stop being fixated on your height and work on yourself. Become a better man. Don't preoccupy yourself with what others think because you're wasting your time and energy on thoughts that don't matter.

    You'll attract women automatically after you become self assured and comfortable within your own skin. Keep in mind success attracts success whether in relationships or marriage.

    Change the way you think and you'll have no problem whatsoever in attracting women and you can afford to become very picky and choosy yourself. Think about that.

    How do you go about doing this? Get healthy, stay fit, eat right, have hobbies, delve into intellectual pursuits, enrich your mind, do charitable good works and volunteer in your community. If you're religious, join a church, serve in various ministries, be with moral people who will influence you, have upstanding friends and get busy being purposeful, industrious and productive. Do something with your life. If you want to attract women, you have to make yourself interesting. No one wants to be with a boring man.

  8. #27
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    My boyfriend is 5í5 and Iím 5í7. His height wasnít a deal breaker in any shape or form. In fact I didnít even notice a height difference until he pointed it out after many dates. What drew me to him was his humor, and being a great communicator. We could and still do talk for hours.

    With the right woman OP height wonít matter. So instead of going for girls who like tall guys, set your standards to girls who really donít care about height. Thereís more woman out there that donít care, then you think!

  9. #28
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    Originally Posted by SophiaG
    Sorry but this great mystery that you solved was simply not true. There are billions of women in the world and they don't all like the same things. Every individual is different. Relationships are between two individuals, not you facing "women" as the entire gender. Generally speaking being short, either for men or women, is not a great advantage in terms of physical attractiveness. But it's far from the worst even in that department, and there is so much more that make someone attractive beyond physical features. There are plenty of short, older men and women who have happy relationships. I wouldn't say it is them being short and/or old that attracted their partners to them, but it didn't stop it, right?

    Instead of focusing on the things that you cannot change, work on the good things you can bring to a relationship. I see you mentioned your academic/career success and high earning potential. That's good, but why do you immediately jump to "what if girls are only with me for my money"? People are attracted to successful people not just for the money but also for the whole package: intelligence, confidence, ambition, which are all parts of you. How is it different than, according to your theory, girls being attracted to tall guys (let's assume for a second that's true)? Do the tall guys think, "heck, what if she's just with me because I'm tall?!" I doubt so. Also, why would you be an "older" man? Are you imagining still only dating 20-somethings when you're 35-40?

    Practice self-love. Learn to see beauty not just in good looks, and remind yourself every now and then all the great things about yourself, that you're perfectly lovable, that you are you, a uniquely beautiful individual not just some "short, old man." And all you need is to find one person that is a good match for you, not for all the women in the world to like you. I've mostly dated taller guys but for a good while in high school I was super attracted to a boy who you can call short. He's smart, confident and pretty good at sports. My crush ended when I found he had a rather arrogant personality, but there were a lot more girls who liked him - probably where his overconfidence came from. He's also very successful after school and now married with kids. I don't think he ever worried for a second whether women would like him as a short man, or if they liked him only for his money, you know?

    Hi, Thanks for your answer.
    I'm not sure you are answering the question that I asked. I was meaning to say, for the population of women who are so fussy about men's height (I would say 95%+ of women), do these women accept short men when these women become older? Like 35 years old? Or do they still look for tall men at that age? Note: I am assuming here that these women will be facing short men at age 35+ as well. When these women and short men are younger these women reject short men but when these women and short men get older, do these women still reject short men? So basically, how does the height criteria for women change as they get older?


    And to comment on this

    ******************How is it different than, according to your theory, girls being attracted to tall guys (let's assume for a second that's true)? Do the tall guys think, "heck, what if she's just with me because I'm tall?!"*************

    I would say the short man who has never been given a chance when young or not rich, and whom all of a sudden is given a chance when he has money; he has a very good reason to ask himself the question why all of a sudden he becomes attractive! It is common sense. If the guy has been in a world and tried all sorts of stuffs and never got a chance he would be stupid to not question why all of a sudden he becomes interesting to those ladies! For the tall guy who has always been given a chance, his height doesn't change. Nothing changes for him; therefore he has no reason to ask himself the question whether the girl is interested only in his height; there is nothing to trigger this question in his mind. Does that make sense?
    Thanks

  10. #29
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    You havenít even said how tall you are. Average is about 5í9.

  11. #30
    Silver Member trezeralietas's Avatar
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    Not a problem for me. I'm a woman who is the male average (5'9") and most of the men I've dated have been my height or shorter. I've had crushes on multiple men shorter than me. It's not about height. It's about attitude and personality and chemistry.

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