princessdi75

My boyfriend can be the same way sometimes, I get mad and then he tells me I'm too sensitive...he can be a jerk, just for his own amusement, but I still love him...he always makes it up by complimenting me like crazy, lol.

My boyfriend rarely says i love you randomly...it always comes when we hang up the phone or when we are saying goodbye to eachother, but other than that, I'll tell him randomly that i love him, and a lot of the time he'll just be like "why?" ...or cough or mumble an i love you to try and be funny (which i don't find funny...) and sometimes he does say it, but he never "initiates" an i love you unless we're saying goodbye. I don't let it bother me though, because I know he loves me. If you're questioning whether or not he actually loves you, then that's a whole different ballgame.

This sounds like me and my boyfriend. Except for the fact that we no longer live together (a financial problem, not a relationship problem)...We don't communicate well...and it is both of our faults. We have been much better the past few weeks, but I really think it's that I am OVER emotional and he is NOT emotional at all. I can sympathize with you, but I can't really give you any advice. As much as I've seeked advice, I'm still not sure how to confront this situation. Perhaps you need to figure out what the REAL problem is. Why are you always so upset? What makes you cry? Are you unhappy? For me, I don't know what my problem is, frankly, I think my birth control is effing up my emotions and I over react to stupid sh*t. But my bf, like yours, doesn't help by being mad at me for being upset. But I do understand where he is coming from. He HATES seeing or hearing me cry or being upset, and he beats himself up about it. Mostly because ever since he's known me i've been a happy-go-lucky person, and now all of a sudden i've turned into a psycho-b*tch. So I've come to accept that I need to figure out my issues BEFORE i can confront any relationship issues. I'm not sure if any of this helps or not, but I really need more details to be more specific.

I keep reading all these posts about "early" signs of what is going to lead into a BAD relationship...You know, all the red flags that people don't tend to notice, and then end up getting hurt later? I've been thinking about the "early" signs of a GOOD long-lasting relationship. Does anyone care to post what signs there were early on in their relationship that it was going to last a long time, or it was even permanent?? You may not even have realized them then, but looking back what were they? I think it would be helpful for people going into a relationship, wondering if it's for the short-term or the long-term. As for me, I know i've only been with my bf for 8 months, and we have had our rough spots, but looking back now, we were pretty much "friends first"...we knew eachother from a professional environment, and went out for the first time just to catch up since we hadn't seen eachother in a few weeks, and that was the beginning of it all. We never had one single "awkward" moment, or a single uncomfortable pause. We were always really comfortable with eachother, and always on the same level. We seemed like we have known eachother our whole lives. ...Yet we do still learn new things about eachother, just the other day we learned that we both like to play board games, and we had NEVER played one together (and we even lived together for 4 months!!!) ...we started having problems with our relationship around month 4 when we were already living together. But it was never anything serious - just him being stressed and me being overdramatic. ...Well...I just look back and think, I can't believe it's been 8 months already. We laugh ALOT...i think that's another sign of a good relationship...even if we fight, we end it laughing.

Not to sound rude, but I think you're being a little dramatic and over-thinking things here. Things like kissing and making out aren't planned...if they were, they wouldn't be as nice! I joke with my bf about I want to come over and "make-out", but it's not like we're planning it. We plan sex sometimes, or if we find ourselves in a situation where it's "do-able" (lol, b/c we both live with family and don't get much privacy) but kissing and making out is always impromptu. Even after 8 months, we'll just be sitting together watching a movie or something and it'll just happen, lol. But maybe I have this wrong, you didn't say in your post that you KNOW this girl is into you 'like that'...so i can only assume she is. But as far as my experience goes, I have had a guy ask me if he can kiss me on a date, and some girls find that sweet, since he asked permission, but I don't. I think it's even more awkward if he asks, and i find it weird, like, what is any decent girl going to say? No? And hurt his feelings? You could get around it, but you have to react, and you don't have much time to think..So basically I felt trapped like I HAD to say yes...I guess everyone's different.

I really don't have any experience, but I would like to add that people rub off on me after awhile. If I hang out with someone that uses a certain phrase, I tend to start using it without realizing it, and sometimes even use it in front of that person - making me embarrassed that they might think i'm trying to "steal" their phrase!!! lol. I would say your best bet would just to socialize more. even online, you can do that. I tend to purposely spell things wrong to reflect my actual speech (such as "wanna"-lol) or i use quotations alot or bold or italicize. I like my personality to reflect even when online!!

No one will probably agree with what I have to say, but if I were you I wouldn't even be in contact with my family. I would just forget them all and live my life the way I want it. There are TONS of people out there that "don't have family" they do actually have family, they just don't speak to them, and it may not even be b/c of reasons as bad as yours. Why do you try soo much to get your mother's approval, or make her like you? I'll tell you, my mom isn't as bad as yours...but i can't stand my mom...she is soo bizarre, and a horrible role model. (she owes me $200 right now...) I don't like her as a person at all. I respect her because she's my mom, but she is very pathetic. I hardly talk to my mom, once a week at most, and it's better that way. You need to make yourself happy. Just because they're family doesn't mean you owe them anything...they treated you horrible when you were growing up.

My boyfriend is the same way...It hasn't been so much lately but he'll always tell me i'm "upset", like he knows my emotions and i don't. He mostly does it over the phone. But still, it's one of our communication barriers. I don't know what his problem is, i mean, i have given him reasons to act the way he does, but i've been working on my OWN issues...yet he stills assumes stuff. I'm an emotional person too, and cry at every little thing...

This is really weird...and i find it wayy gross that you enjoy being naked in front of your family. I'm not drop-dead gorgeous or anything, but i wouldn't be ashamed to change clothes or something in front of people, including some family members, but i wouldn't go as far as being COMPLETELY naked. That's just weird. If you want lots of people to see you naked apply for playboy or go join a strip club...Most families find other family members naked bodies to be gross, no matter what you look like. Perhaps you should see a therapist...

i agree, and disagree. I'm the kind of person that thinks "what i don't know can't hurt me!" ...but if i was being cheated on i'd want to know. I am a snoop, it's just one of my character flaws (i think it runs in my family!) but I'm nosy. My bf has nothing to hide and i still snoop through his stuff for no good reason, just boredom i guess, lol. i feel like, if you feel you have a reason to snoop, then do it, it's better to just KNOW instead of killing yourself wondering. But be prepared, you may find out something stupid and miniscule that you just wouldn't want to know...people will be people, and we all have weird things we do and don't tell anyone (lol).

I just had to post...I love telling my story... I am now going on 8 months with my current boyfriend. We met in December 2004 when I was desperate for a job and applied at the local drugstore. He was the manager. (So yes, I'm now dating my ex-boss! - I'll be 20 in July and he'll be 26 in October) So I got the job and he was a nice enough guy but we really didn't get along. We fought alot and argued. He was my boss until June 2005 when he quit. I was only working weekends at that point because I had got a "real" job. So we exchanged email addresses, but i really had no intention of emailing him, and he told me later that he wasn't planning on emailing me. The very last time i saw him at work i joked about why he didn't email me, so a few days later he did, just to be funny and annoy me about "me" as an employee. So we emailed eachother once or twice and over the next three weeks, and then I was dying to see war of the worlds but had no one to go with, so i asked him if he wanted to come and i could catch him up on whats been going on at work (since i still worked there on weekends). So we went to the movies then decided it was still early and we were hungry and went out to eat. It was fun, nice, and very casual. I didn't think of it as a date, just hanging out (although he paid for everything...he said because it was my birthday - and it was, so i didn't think much of it). So i went to the beach for the next 4 days after that with some people and he told me to call him when i got back to tell him how it went. Then we started talking on the phone...and emailing...and we got together the next weekend and again, i just thought it was fun, casual, hanging out...and then when we went to hug goodbye he kissed my cheek! I was soo in shock and it was like, "um...okay, I guess he likes me!!" It took awhile to register, lol. So we started talking on the phone every single day and then i had to work on sunday and so we met at the big sheetz by my work and just talked out back on the patio...then we went to leave and we had our first kiss...and i have butterflies now just thinking about it...It didn't even matter that we were standing under blinding lights in the parking lot of a gas station right next to the main road...lol. A week later we had sex. ...in his car...behind babies 'r' us...no joke. we both lived with our parents, lol, as we do now, but after two VERY close calls of getting caught, we don't do that anymore. We barely have sex, lol (b/c nowhere TO do it), but it's okay, we don't need it to be happy...ANYWAY That night we talked about our "exclusiveness"...a month later we went to the beach together and exchanged "i love yous" ...a month after that we were moved in together (we couldn't afford to stay where we were) ...and now almost 8 months later we're still going strong...a few "hard times" that led me to posting on this board...but i'm overdramatic and i know it. I love that kid, and I believe that this is the beginning of "forever"!!!

I'm very happy for you, and I wish i had your strength. I have a hard time controlling my emotions, i wish i knew how you did it, and how i can do it too. I'm still with my boyfriend but very dependent on him. I wish i could not be so needy...but the truth is, my boyfriend is all i have. before i started dating him, i never really went out with anyone else or did much else. just sat around and came up with random things to do alone. I know i come on to him too strong, but i don't know how else to act.

You need to figure out what YOU want. If you want to be with her, then talk it out with her and tell her you need a straight answer of what she wants. You're either together, or your not. If you're not going to be together than I suggest NC so that she doesn't keep playing these games with you.

First off, it's INFATUATION...not infacuation. Sorry, but this post really ticks me off. Especially the part about people (although you referred solely to men) should be switching partners all the time...Infatuation is NOT love...it is a VERY good feeling, but it is NOT love. Infatuation and love are two different things. I do not believe in love at first sight. I believe in infatuation at first sight...and sometimes people do fall in love after being infatuated...and they simply claim it to be "love at first sight" because they thought their infatuation was love. My boyfriend and I exchanged "i love you's" after 3 1/2 weeks of dating (granted we knew eachother for 7 months previously, but you could hardly call us friends) So I do agree that love can happen fast and doesn't always take time (afterall, we're still together after 7 months), but that's not to say we haven't had our rough spots (i post on here about our problems). I definitly don't believe that true love takes years and years. I do believe that infatuation is false love...you may feel wonderful...but love is deeper, than that, and lasts longer.

My boyfriend used to waste his money on me all the time. Then, like your bf, he was broke due to bad circumstances. Now he is mopey and depressed a lot of the time, and he refuses to let me pay for stuff we do. I would say your bf, is just in a rut and things will get better. There's tons of things you guys can do without money...just remind him of that and that you want to see him.

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I'm soo sorry. You can read some of my threads about problems I've had with my bf. Here is my current one: I am very dependent on my bf and it's causing us problems and he has even tried to break up with me, but fortunately, we didn't. I know what you're going through and how you are feeling. I'm sorry that I don't really have any advice for you. I'm sure everyone here will help you get through this.

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I'm sorry, but no one can really tell you what's going on but him. i think i write this on every post i make, but my bf and i almost broke up, and it was an issue of he thought that was what i needed and what would be best for us, but it wasn't, obviously. why did you guys break up? You need to talk the whole thing out.

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I sometimes feel like this, but it's never been so bad to the point where i DON'T go out of the house, or i don't go to work. I contemplate calling off work (i have paid leave) so that motivates me to NOT go to work, lol. But i still go. I just sometimes feel really down and don't know why. I think for me it may be because i'm at a point in my life where i'm content, yet i'm not happy. I'm living paycheck to paycheck, yet i'm living comfortably so. I just get bummed out that things ARE good, but not the way i want them. I don't know about the not wanting to even move, part, but as for the pissed-for-no-reason stuff...i think everyone gets like that every now and then.

I think you may want to re-evaluate your relationship with this guy and decide if you really want to make this work. This guy is treating you very badly, the way he talks to you and doesn't want to share his space. My bf is like yours, where he doesn't like to communicate his feelings and then all of a sudden it seems like he changed his mind out of nowhere, when really he's probably been thinking about it for awhile. This is something you need to adjust to, and if you can't then you shouldn't be together. My boyfriend and I are opposites in the communication department...i'm extroverted he's introverted. I just posted something about this: The member, Scout, gave me very good advice, you should read that thread. As for going from "practically" living together, to not living together...well my boyfriend and i lived together for 4 months after we were dating for 2 months (if it's any justification we knew eachother for 7 months before we started dating) But in January we couldn't afford to live where we were, so now we're both back with family and it's been hard, but we've made it. We'll be 8 months on the 15th of March and I couldn't be happier. We have our differences but we love eachother, and we've worked through them. You need to figure out if you really want to be with this guy, if everything you're going through is really worth it, or if you should give it a break, or just flat out call it quits. After you figure out what YOU want, than you can have a serious talk with him, and even if he has no emotion and doesn't respond (like my bf), at least you can be satisfied, because you know what you want, and you'll be happy.

Thanks Scout, you're advice is obvious, and I should have realized it myself.

I give a lot of advice on here that people need to talk and communicate better, and it's true...