princessdi75

I wish i would have come back to this thread earlier...I'm REALLY glad to hear the progress you've made with you're bf. It reminds me SO much of me and my man. i've been trying to be light and cheerful too, just like you mentioned, and it is hard. I wanted to see him tonight but he was in one of his "moods"...he didn't sleep at all last night (he has some sleeping problems tied in with his (mild) depression) and he said he'd rather wait to see me tomorrow since he lives an hour away and he was going to sleep at 6 when I last talked to him. He said he'd call me tonight when he woke up, but i told him he doesn't have to if he's too tired. But, i know he will call He's just like that. Well, i just wanted to let you know that the advice on here has actually helped me out some too and I hope everything goes well for you

I don't entirely agree with Eddie, I think that's a pretty big assumption. If she still tells you she loves you, yet needs a "break" there might be other things into play than just her feelings for you. It's all about communication. Let her have her space if that's what she needs, and when she's calling you, then make sure you talk and decide what you both want and figure out where to go from there. My biggest problem with my BF is communication, so I can understand how confused you must be over your girlfriend.

My boyfriend did something similar to me last week when he "broke up" with me (we're together now and everythings fine) but he said he still had all the same feelings. Turns out he just thought it would be better for us to "just be friends" because he thought I wasn't happy in the relationship. Not true. So we talked and worked things out. You need to decide what you want and follow through. I personally couldn't "just be friends" with my current bf cuz i love him and wouldn't be able to handle it. A "long" break, just seems like a game to me, and I wouldn't put up with it.

I have read this whole post, thinking it was going to end as some big joke...But I'm just wondering - why a snake?? And how attractive can anyone be when they're dressed as a snake?? ...Maybe this guy is actually attracted to reptiles or something...and in that case do you really want to date a guy that fantasizes about "making out" with animals??? Lol...this is just weird...

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Sounds like my mom, my parents are slightly racist, and my 76 year old grandma has no problem throwing out the N-word.

That was really good silvercloud, whoever wrote that deserves props. I don't really know how to explain love, or infatuation. Those were good solid statements, and make me even more confident that i LOVE my boyfriend.

I think you're going about this the right way, whatever feels most comfortable for you. Please keep us posted, i'd love to hear how things are going for you.

I find it comforting to hear other stories of people going through the same thing or have, even though they may not have worked out. I think what it all comes down to is how much you want to be with someone, and if you're willing to stick with them even though they may not be available to you 24/7. I think my biggest problem is i crave attention and especially want it from my bf, who does a pretty good job of spoiling me to begin with. Things aren't impossible for us, and we're both here for eachother. Cordell, things will work out in the end. Just make sure you're happy...you need to come first.

You shouldn't have to put up with that after 6 months. No calling? My bf and I will be 8 months on March 15 and we haven't gone one day without out at least calling eachother. That's pretty low to not email you back, but only if you're SURE he would have seen it. My relationship isn't perfect, i don't think anyones is, but I can give you a little insight to mine, because you seem to be dealing with a little of what i've had to go through. My bf is going to school he is 25 and i'm 19...he doesn't know what he wants out of life and sometimes gets into really bad moods where his self-esteem is at an ultimate low. I felt like he didn't WANT to have time for me, when really he's just the kind of person that isn't motivated. He did want to see me, but if was afraid of making me upset if he was upset (b/c i do take on his moods, that's just how i am). Since our "breakup", which was last Saturday night, he called me as soon as i got home sunday morning after we made-up just to make sure i was okay and I was still confused. I've been scared all week when i've talked to him on the phone that he was going to break up with me again. I love him to much to lose him. I don't know what he wants, thereforeeee I don't know how to give him what he wants. I don't know if i need to step back or move forward, and i don't think he knows either. I'm going to start seeing him more, though. I'm going to make the trip to his place as often as i can, b/c i don't mind driving 45minutes-1hour. It's all worth it to me. I'm going to try to talk to him tonight about what's going on and what he wants from me, i still feel things need to change but i don't know how. Things are really good right now, he told me he missed me last night before I said anything...and I just saw him Monday, so tonight I'll get to see him, and hopefully talk about everything. I think what you need to do, is figure out what YOU want. And after you figure that out, you need to talk to him and let him know, and figure out how to compromise. Call HIM if you want to talk to him. Don't be stubborn just because it's his "turn" to make the effort. I'm always stubborn like that. I feel like "i did my part, now it's his turn"... ...but you have to understand where he's coming from, even if it doesn't make sense to you. I don't understand how my bf can be so lazy and not want to finish college and not want to get a job, but that's how he IS, and i have to understand how he IS, to be able to understand our relationship and what i need to do to make things work. It's not that he doesn't want to be with me, it's that he's going through personal struggles, and can't devote all his time to me, like i can devote my time to him. (and just so you don't think my bf's a complete douche, he hates college b/c he's been pushed into a major he doesn't like, and he's very depressed with his work experience, and doesn't want a job like he had before, where he was a manager and got taken advantage of by his employees and bosses) ...he has a lot of potential and i know he'll be something great, he just has a hard time believing it, he has a low self-esteem. I hope that you work everything out. My bf tells me that sometimes what you want isn't what's best for you...I hope you can figure everything out. Good Luck.

1. How did your past/current partner know you before asking/being asked out? And how long did it take? We knew eachother for like 7 months before we started going out. We didn't even like eachother to start! My bf was my boss at our local drugstore and we argued a lot. He quit and we decided to keep in touch through email. A month later we were going out. 2. Did you meet each other often before asking/being asked out? We went out twice just to "hang out" and it was fun and casual, but it turns out after the 2nd time we went out he kissed me and i had no idea he liked me!! 3. How did you find asking him/her out and how did the other take it? We didn't really ask eachother out. I did ask him to go see a movie with me, but just b/c we were friends and needed someone to go with, lol. 4. Does saying ‘yes’ to a guy asking you out necessarily mean he’s bf/husband material – even if you know him well? If not, why say ‘yes’ anyway? I'm not looking for a husband, even though I'm in a very serious commited relationship. I want to spend the rest of my life with my boyfriend but I don't need to be married to him to commit myself to him. It's all about what both of you want in the relationship. Everyone is different and if you want different things but want to be together, you need to compromise. I am young and don't have any cares about marriage, while my boyfriend is 6 years older and is haunted by his parent's divorce and is marriage-phobic (not commitment-phobic) ...he is commited to me.

My boyfriend and I are going through similar hard times, but we barely see eachother once a week. I'm always really emotional...and then last weekend my boyfriend DID dump me. He told me he loves me and has all the same feelings for me but can't be in a relationship. I was devastated, and I don't think he really wanted to do it, he just thinks that's what's best for me, because he can't stand being the cause of my sadness. But the next day we woke up (i slept at his place even though he was dumping me, b/c it was really late and he lives an hour from me) and I told him I could never be "just friends" because it would hurt too much everytime I see him or talk to him...so we didn't break up and things are better than ever. It kind of opened my eyes to what's been going on and what I really want out of this relationship. Our biggest relationship problem is communication, not because we don't talk to eachother, but because we never really say exactly what we mean, and we assume too much about eachother, but that is just the way we are as people, it doesn't have anything to do with our relationship, although it affects it. It sounds to me like you need to figure out what you want. If you're waiting for your bf to dump you, it sounds like you want him to! The only real thing you can do is talk and compromise and find something that works. Or decide if you really want to be together.

dreams are just dreams...But I would be upset too, just because he's talking about his ex, and not you! There's nothing he can do, and has no control over his dreams or sleepwalking. Who knows if he still has feelings for her? Only he knows, and even then, he could just be lying to himself because he doesn't WANT to still have feelings for her. Perhaps he should see a doctor regarding sleep talking and sleep walking...It really could mean nothing. My boyfriend tells me I sleep talk sometimes, and he'll never let me live down the one time I said: "my mom has all the harry potter books"...which she definitly has never even picked up a harry potter book. Lol.

You need to tell her how you feel. You deserve to be treated better, especially after 6 months of being together. My boyfriend is extremely jealous of other guys and I always tell him every last detail of the situation if it involves a guy. I don't want him to get the wrong impression. He knows i would never cheat on him, but I don't want him to have any questionable feelings. I think it's a matter of respect, and love, to tell my boyfriend that I was hanging out with a guy. If an ex of mine would ever call me to hang out I would ask permission first from my boyfriend. My boyfriend is more important than any one, and I'd rather not hang out with an old friend than place him in an uncomfortable situation.

Sorry to hear what you're going through. Sounds to me like you deserve a lot better than her. You just need to move on - not necessarily dating, but move on with your life. You're better off with out her.

How long have you been going out? It's harder in the beginning, especially if you don't know eachother that well. I knew my current bf of 7 months for about 7 months before we even started liking eachother. We have never had one awkward moment or anything, we're really good together. And maybe we're weird, but we talk on the phone everyday. We haven't gone a single day with no phone contact since we started dating. We always call to at least say goodnight.

thanks......

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Any advice?

Oh my gosh! I'm going through the exact same things...I can totally relate. I'm always upset about my relationship with my bf of 7 months and he gets upset that i'm upset. We are in a rut right now due to unavoidable circumstances and he is going through some hard times. I love him soo much and we talk about a future together (although he says now that he never wants to be married, but that's a completely diff. story), and I do think about breaking up with him, just because I hate how I feel when I'm not with him. I hate that i only get to see him like once a week, even though we haven't gone one day in the past 7 months without talking on the phone. I hate that I miss him so much. It's a horrible horrible feeling, and it makes me want to break up with him, just so i don't have to deal with the bad feelings. ...yet I don't want to give up on everything wonderful we have. We are absolutely perfect together. We are very much in love. Yet, i don't know how to handle my feelings. I keep myself busy but when i'm going to bed at night, all these feelings start creeping into my mind. Why does love have to hurt so much???