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Tronix, I thought that if they did find me good enough to go out with a friend of theirs, they would have done so already....like I happen to have chatted with friends of my elder sister and they knew that I'm single. Liked 1 friend in particular but what happened? She's going out with an older man who is the brother of a soccer buddy of hers who's actually GONE TO JAIL! And did my sister or her friends do anything even though they KNEW I was single?....NO! Ghost, was thinking about doing that for a long time...but wouldn't be lonely at a bar make me appear unattractive and even look like a hermit. Tried that a couple of times when I was invited out and it felt damn uncomfortable...

Tronix, that's the problem....they don't appear to show some slight interest, and even if they do this gets mixed up with just being friendly. I had several lady friends who acted quite sweet towards me and yet stayed with their own bfs who they obviously like more - otherwise what's the point in being with THEM? And btw, thanks for compliment (lol)! Ghost, been trying to socialise in person, but had quite a few complicatons to deal with too...such as not having too many other friends (need to have friends to make friends, right?), feeling that family is always watching you, coming accross so many stuck up men and women etc. Eg went to quiz night last Nov just for that purpose and yet got into table with two couples and one guy suggested for me to go out with a girl he knows - but he was drunk and didn't bother calling me after (aaargh!)

Good saying, Shiva Daywalker, um....you can't exactly have fun if you hear too many no's. I'm trying to figure out if what I'm feeling inside about some parts of my life can be easily sniffed by women...and why they in general appear 10 times more likely to go out with fakers! I understand the importance of asking a girl out myself, but I have to do it properly. I don't even know if I should ask her the first time I meet her? 10th time I meet her? When she knows me well enough 2 years down the track? etc. Know what I mean? I might ask a girl out straight away, but I could at least know if she's already taken And tronix, I have been quite aware of non verbal communication. Even if I put on my best non verbal behaviour - even acting 100% natural and confident, I still feel that they are giving me the cold shoulder. I can at least tell that when I walk past some of them they give slight signs of being reprehensive!

Don't worry Shiva, I'm not offended at all I do believe that it will not happen to me because I'd be making sure to the best of my ability that it won't happen. But I will not know every woman I meet better than herself and that I'd need to consider one big enemy that can be as bad as evil in dictating one person's life - circumstance. I'm trying to figure out what's really going on to make sure that circumstance can work more in my favour and less against me. Oh, perhaps there is a bit of a rush at my age....I'm starting to get a feeling that more women are being snapped up like bullets from a machine gun. I've found some great woman friends whom I love to go out with but it never happened either because they found someone else at the same time, have friends who hate my guts or who move to another part of the world Talk about unlucky...

Well, Shiva...lot of things but without making a life story obvious they include: - feeling that at age 25 and studying at uni, I feel unsuitable just because I'm not earning a DECENT wage; - enduring many bad things at high school and uni, where despite my hard work, I only managed to get into a good course - only JUST, and was nearly made to go out with fat and/or ugly ladies against my will; - feeling that just because of where I live and of my mixed heritage (Italian/Australian), I would not be ethnically acceptable to them; - feeling that I have to have the body of Justin Timberlake or David Hasselhoff just for them to even see me as attractive, and; - being afraid that me going out with particular girls will make me miss the best lady for marriage and lead to a stuffed up marriage with stuffed up kids, just like most couples in my dad's and mum's families It's handful, I know, but I feel that they are just not valid. It's just that my body and mind can't 'accept' this FACT!

I might like to ask the women out there something. I have been having trouble trying to chat with different ladies...and even if I do, I never ever have the chance of even asking them for a coffee in person...always because of some stupid reason. Whatever reason, I'm always held back. Maybe it's myself because I fear that everyone would always say no - just because I'm me. I'm considered to be quite attractive, not really overweight (stocky), not fidgety and quite likeable. But, deep down, I always felt bitter about a lot of things related and NOT related to women in my life to the point where if something stuffs up, I lose my self-control. I never lost it in front of women, but I wonder if women can by intuition sense that a man like me is just too bitter or too odd or too socially unacceptable etc for them to even bother liking him. I keep feeling that whenever I talk to women they act as if I've a massive wart on my nose! Thanks P.S. If anyone suggests for me to seek professional help (just curious), would it necessarily mean that I will have to forget about love until I'm 'cured'?

With Croatia now a part of the EU (where Italy has been since 1958), that can only be a GOOD THING! What did you think of it?

Hi everyone Just been thinking about a girl I liked (ok...probably loved - and still do) for more than 2 years. I have actually thought up of a song...but it's written in Italian. Good news is it's translated into English (will sound corny - but was meant to originally be in Italian - rhymes in Italian etc). Hope u enjoy it. Like to see what u think. Thanks... Perchè Io? Why Me? Italiano (Italian) C’erano molte mattine quando sentivo il sole, trovavo un foto di te fra le donne altre Ti guardavo negli occhi – quei luminosi e castagni, dell’anima più pura di tutte Era sempre una vergogna che la scena tua non anche sembrava la belezza interna Ma era sempre gioia per averti conosciuta un bell’esempio di una donna d’Italia La tua esistenza rilasciava intorno io un’appreciazione dell’amore che, prima mai, non credevo Nel mondo di brutalità e di ogni sogno falso, sono di fortuna di chiedermi: perchè io? CORO (CHORUS) La mente mia è di fulmine L’anima mia vuole balzare Il cuore mio deve scegliere di palpitare or spezzare Ogni singola parte di io vuole fare un ruggito quando di chiedere: perchè io? C’erano sempre momenti quando mi alludevi a volere qualcosa più di rimangere amici Ma erai sempre con uno dei bastardi - non capisco il bisogno di tutti dei guai Tutto non mai ha merito o senso - mi dicevi che erai contenta con LUI, tutto Ma perchè, quando hai letto che ti ho scritto, hai fatto, secondo te, un pianto furioso?! CORO (CHORUS) Che c’era ragione mai per rifiutarmi? Era qualcosa intorno io che ti fa spaventi? Qualcosa che l’altro sembrava sempre migliorarmi? O qualcosa intorno te che sentivi disgustarti? Non hai paura mai, carissima donna! L’ozione che scegli sarà accettata Ma io spero per domani, per l’unione nostra, del futuro di luce per noi, cara! CORO (CHORUS) Ogni singola parte di io vuole fare un ruggito quando di chiedere: perchè io? Traduzione all’Inglese (Translation into English) There were many mornings when I felt the Sun, I find a photo of you among the other ladies I look into the eyes - those bright hazel eyes Of the purest soul of them all It was always a shame that your looks don’t also show your beauty within It’s always joy per knowing you A beautiful example of a woman of Italy Your existence releases within me an appreciation of a love I never believed before In the world of brutality and every false dream, I’m lucky to ask myself: why me? CHORUS My mind goes like lightning My soul wants to explode My heart must choose to beat or break Every single part of me wants to roar when asking: why me? There were moments when you hinted of wanting to be more than friends But you always were with one of those bastards – I don’t understand the need for all this trouble It all doesn’t have merit or sense – you say you’re all happy with HIM But why, when you read what I wrote to you, you said to have made a wild cry! CHORUS Was there ever a reason to turn me down? Was it something within me that scares you? Something within him that’s always better than within me? Or something within you that you feel disgusts yourself? Never be afraid, dearest lady! Whatever you choose will be accepted But I hope for tomorrow, of our own union, of a future for us bright as light, my dear! CHORUS Every single part of me wants to roar when asking: why me?

Actually, I don't go to bars and clubs very often at all (I do get dismayed at the constant mention of women always being picked up in droves in those two places - even though it might not really be the case). I have come accross women in many places - and yet not had any girl giving off good vibes after I gave them some nice, and sometimes polite vibes - such as smiling, saying you wear some nice earrings etc. I also am doing dancing classes - and meeting a nice Polish lady. I go to uni, and sometimes chat with some chics there. And I have just joined up an Italian youth group (as I've Italian background), with a friend of a member saying that he works with a girl he might arrange for me to meet. In this case, just gotta be careful with how I cope with demand. And I'm afraid of other things such as asking the girl out in the wrong way, whether I should ask her out two minutes after I first meet her and whether going out with the girl would risk me losing the true love of my life!

One little problem...I've tried acting completely comfortable but I kept thinking that, judging by the way women kept acting (if they were that interested, they'd make it at least a bit obvious, right?) like I'm no big deal, I always think that no matter how confident I appeared, how well dressed I was or how approachable and clean I've made myself...it's like I've a huge damn wart on my nose. Women just wouldn't give me a sign that says "I find you interesting/cute, can you at least make a first move or something!". I felt like that despite me being me I've always had a cold shoulder brought on.

Scout, I might like to ask: what happens if the opportunity to move in does not occur in the time you're there without looking like a stalker? I'mThatGirl, I'm trying to figure out exactly how other guys actually "butt in" in their own way and then take over - that happens not only in pubs and nightclubs, but everywhere else too. I'm hoping it's not true that girls just go out with guys they've met only just the third time or earlier - unless it's a blind date Batya33, if it's part to do with my own vibes, then would it be better to be myself (and appear even a bit shy, hesitant etc) or just pretend to be totally comfortable - even though I might look over the top?

Girls, ladies, women...aaarrrgh! I was never intending to be stereotypical...but I don't understand why women never intended to lift their heads up when they see a guy, especially in larger groups of women. I know both men and women are people, but we obviously are still different. I was only stating the obvious...but I appreciate comments anyway

1. What if a break is not possible and or cannot be predicted? 2. Men do talk a lot too, but I can't help but think that maybe when women start talking, they go on through solid dialogue for a reasonable time (unlike us men, who usually have shorter responses and have less dense conversations). It's not really to do with the topics women discuss - I can talk about anything. It's just harder if a girl doesn't flow well with dialogue too much

You know, I wish I could agree with you on this one. I still think about a lady who appeared to like me even though she had two bfs at separate times. I know that she probably still likes me now, but is still hanging out with the other guy (and that's what counts, right? - if there was nothing wrong with me, she'd dump him in 2 secs, huh?). I just can't help but think sometimes that once a woman stays with a particular guy, you'd tend to think that she would be so deeply in love with him, she'd say yes if he popped the big question tomorrow.

Hey all I might like to ask about a guy trying to initiate a conversation with a girl but couldn't because of some friend (usually female) talking with her and keeping her occupied like a wild chicken on steroids. So what is the best way to join into a conversation when a girl you want to talk to is busily chatting with someone else...without appearing impolite? And also, when the girl is in a group of girls madly chatting away, is "girl's chatter" that sacred, it must never be interferred with by a guy? This is because one of the biggest reasons why I keep missing "opportunities" is because of me not being able to talk to them enough before another guy hooks her up out of nowhere. I'd appreciate any suggestions, thanks.