goddess23

hey everyone. okay i want to give you a breakdown and get some genearl opinions. my bf and i went out for 9 months, we were eachothers first relationship. he broke it off--he was confused. at first we were reallly tight but we drifted. i was beginning to move on and whatever. i still loved him but i lost hope and pretended watever. anways like 6 months after our breakup we started getting realllly tight. tons of flirting and whatever. so we had a converstaion and discovered we both still like eachohter but dont want to go back down that road at least not now. so anways after that converstaion we spent a couple of days together making out and just getting into it, talking whatever. march break came and ihavnt seen him, just talked online. now the first day that we made out he blurted out i love you. and i wasl ike are you sure because i had this feeling it just wasnt for real. anways that passed...then now his friend was telling me how "he tells me he likes you alot and thinks about you 24/7 but that he feels guilty about something but doesnt know what." what do you tihnk he could be guilty about? and what do you think about this situation in general.

ouch. you need to start having some self control on your behavior. you need to get involved in other things so that you're too busy to worry about where she is every moment. getting busy is the best solution....hanging with friends, extra curricular....something. you're right, you will push her away this way. maybe you should make small commitments to yourself "like okay today i will call her only once". make small "goals" for yourself until it become habit.

if she says thats the only light she sees him in believe her. dont do anything stupid, the fact that you pretend that it doesnt bother you will make her reallly attracted to you. if it really bothers you tell her to tell him how she feels, because its annoying that this guy is doing this. dont say it hurts you or something, just say its annoying. better choice of words!!

see here 60 is not good at all but for some its STILL OKAY like if we get that on one test its not a big deal. as long as we can get higher marks on other stuff we'd be like okaay 60 is still not like TOTALLY HORRIBLE lolz

oo okay kewl. happy bday in advance. ya from what you told me now i think the kissing is NOT A PROBLEM, the only problem is that it could possibly burn out or you will get bored and want to go further. but honestly i dont think its a problem. kissing is fun, its hard to get bored. me n my bf just did that for 4 months lol. NOTHING ELSE. so ya dont stress it!

its true. try not to worry about it. but you need to meet up or try antoher form of communication.

well then you can tell her exactly what i wrote. tell her that at this point you're just not sure you can be friends. because even though you feel this way now, you may feel differently later. but i think it would be good if you told her that you just cant trust her anymore and it will take time before that is rebuilt if ever...

exactly what keefy said. you have to give her a chance to miss you. you have to pretend that okayyy whatever, you're dating other people allalalalala. she will probably come back running sooner then later.

two choices: slowly distance yourself from her or just tell her straight up "i want to be friends but at this point im not sure if i can be a supportive friend. because a friend should be happy for you and giving you advice about the dates you go on and not thinking about the last time we had sex...and i just cant be a true friend to you right now so i need some time for myself, and i know you also need it. i know you say you want to be friends but i know at this point it just wouldnt work on either side. i hope that we can be later on becaues i still care for you with all my heart but im just not sure if thats a possibility at this point. i wish you the best with everything and i hope that soon we can move past the past."

just go with the flow. i dont think you need to back off, but as someone said, backing off emotioanlly. try and not get too attached. and if you're always kissing when you're together then you should be spedning time talking on the phone or on msn about substance lol. if kissing is all you do then there is a problem. but if you talk and what not other times its okay. i mean you're 16 and thats basically where i am (just turned 17) and with my bf when we're together, time is LIMITED, what maybe an hour after school. and we take 20 mins to just play with eachother and hug and cuddle so we need to kiss the rest of the time otherwise we're juts friends lol. but then we'll talk for hours online about the day and about our lives and about anything. so there needs to be balance. dont back off iwth the kissing otherwise she'll be relaly confuzzled even if you tell her.

if you want to move on you have to lose hope. dont ignore her, but try and distance yourself a bit. being friends will be good later on. right now you need to come to the conclusion that its over if you want to move on. telling her how you feel at this point is probably a bit pointless because it seems shes set on her decision. if you cant deal wit hthat right now then you need to let her know that you would like to be friends but for now you just need some time alone.

ouch. it seems you're going through a really tough time in your life. listen, i have lived in to allll my life. i LOVEEE IT HERE, but i know that its all about that change you had to make. question: do you go to york uni? look, first of all, let me say that school here in canada is MUCH MORE DIFFICULT, and like in the states apparently 70 is a pass here thats meeting the standards because the work is at a different level. basically getting a 70 here is like getting a 90 in the states so i have a feeling that you might be feeling as if your grades are super low when in reality they just look crappy compared to the ones you were getting. trust me, i know ALOT OF PEOPLE who come here from the states and are like HOLLLY SCHOOL HERE IS SOOO HARD. try and take it easy, if you're doing everything you can to improve then good, im sure the stress in you life is taking a toll. i know this doesnt compare AT ALL, but i remember in the sixth grade everythign seemed to just fall apart. like there were alot of money problems, family problems, my grades dropped, i went from being super popular to close to nothing. it was truly just a faze. and as tough as it was im soo glad i went through it. i know this doesnt sound so great right now, but it will pass. honestly like if you're getting 80s here thats AMAZINGGG, i mean thats considered veryyy good. dont ask me why but i have a feeling you're probably doing 80s...am i right??! lol...as far as your social status goes, dont stress about it, and you know toronto is FULL OF CLUBS and places to go i mean toronto is so multi cultural and full of every extra curricular there is. on the weekends go to a club, even all ages or soemthing if you want to meet people more your age. i went to one that was 19+ (uncle got me in lol) and it was full of people AT LEAST 25...so you might be better off going all ages. and you will meet people through school. dont force it, it may take you your first year but dont stress it. o gawd and those days when the pop machine takes your money are absolute hell. i know! take it one step at a time, try your best in school and try not to worry about so much. i know its much easier said than done but things will get better and im sure you're just having a reallly tough day. its probably one of those days where turns you into a hard core pessemist. good luck with uni! its my second choice university here in to! im really scared toooo....im in gr 11 right now and im so scared about it all and the stress is starting to take a toll...but just take it one day at a time. and one bad test is just that -one bad test. by making the efforts it will pay off and you seem to be a smart kid. its just all the other crap in your life is cuasing an unconscious distraction. and dont try and justify it but just know that you must persevere through it all. it will get better!!

okay listen. im now getting to see that most guys do actually like a lil flub. now let me explain. i think IN GENERAL, guys dont CARE TO SEE ABS. you stomach needs to be flat. like if your side profile has this little ponch happening in general its a turnoff. but like ive noticed guys like to grab onto something. for example i just sort of got bak with my ex. when we were going out i think i was skinnier than i am now...well i didnt think so but he seems to think so but he liked the fact that i was more "grabbable". still have the flat stomach, if you punch mmy stomach it feels hard, and you can feel my hip bones yet theres a little something to hold onto. so if you have a ponch, even if its small than any type of aerobics will help. that area is tough, you need to burn the fat, obviously you want to watch what you eat and try doing some sit ups. but if your stomach is flat, dont worry about gaining abs. i sort of wanted to but ALLLL the guys i know dont really like abs abs on a girl, be fit and lean with something to hold on to.

to fantasize about a "CHARACTER", someone just based on their appearance or just because of their celebrity status...but if you fantaasize about someone else who is a personal friend....and its just this one person all the time. if you feel a strong connection with this person then its not really normal.

lol seriously ive never heard about it in other girls. but it was really scary...and it makes me think sex ed classes should probably occur earlier.

well thats why i said, i wasnt sure if you were really into that. thats why i said, if you're not interested in that, then its time to get out. exclusive fun is what makes it better. see friends with benefits are a littel different because there is NO COMMITMENT. in this sense, you two are the only parties involved, no dating other people, but you're not going to be comiteed like a bf/gf. so far, its been EXACTLY what i want. and im fully aware that the possibility of getting hurt is veryyy there. but right now, it just feels like what we both want. thats why i suggested it. i know for a fact it doesnt go for everyeon, and what you want is not what he wnats--time to get out of this circle chase

hhes "your guy" he likes you. this bragging is a symbol that hes proud of you. and he likes you ALOT.

lol...well i was REALLY FREAKED when i saw pubic hair when i was 6. i thought i was dying or i was a monster. puberty at a young age really sucks too!

hmmm....the comparison to the ex is always one that screws you over. however, im a big believer that sometimes theres just something NOT THERE. i would still say give it a little time...i mean maybe 2 more dates. see how you feel. but there needs to be a spark and if its not there then you're leading her on. at this stage those butterflies and forgetfullness should be full throtle. because it only goes downhill after time in that department lol. however sometiems i believe thats when true love emerges, when those feelings of infactuation go away and you still want to be with that person. but newayzzz, i think that you can give it A LIL more time, but love is not a mathematical equation and you cannot use a list to define your heart. just doesnt owrk.

hey. well...ive only had one brekaup and it was done holding hands lol. but it was tough...we remained friends...and now we're sort of bak togeher after 6 months. so i would say not a TOTALLLY HORRIBLE BREAKUP lol.

well i know that a diet of 1200 calories is for people who are trying to have dramatic weight loss in a short period. thats like the BARE MINIMUM. your obsession with your diet seems to be a problem and if you cna try and talk to someone. like avman said, a help hotline. it is important that your body image issues are attended to. pleas realize that you are beautiful, and im sureee that you have a distorted image of yourself. enjoy your life, its not about counting calories, its about taking care of yourself so you can enjoy what life gives you.

hey. okay...i agree with some of the posters, he is somewhat playing games. he definitely wants the best of both worlds. but looking at your age (you're young), you may not want that commitment again either. i mean look...i went out with my first bf for 9 months and we broke up. now 6 months later he says he still likes me but doesnt want to get serious again (now he is 15) and i kind of feel the same way. i realize that eventually i will want a commitment but for now i actually like it. i love it. im just saying if you dont mind it then fine...but if it really hurts you then you need to end it. if you want someting more then you have to get out because its clear that right now he doesnt want more. honestly he may truly just not want a serious relationship right now. and since you two have been there done that, you know exactly what you would be gettinb back into which may not be what you guys need right now yet you do have an attraction towards one another. let me say this arrangement with my ex is at times tough and its not that simple, but it really depends on you two. he clearly still likes you, maybe just say look....you wanna do the once in a while tihng, so do i. but if you ever feel that you like someone else, or wnat to date someone else then we can put an end to it. for now lets just have exclusive fun. thats an option (basically what im doing right now). but i dont know what you really want. if you want a comitment, get out of it and look somewhere else.

lol. when i was about 10. see...before that i always thought sex was just like two people being naked together. during puberty class, when the teacher explained it i sat a little confuzzled and then i asked "so...wait...the penis goes INTO the vagina?" n my teacher was like well....yes. and thats when i began clenching my muscles together and crossing my legs. and till this day when people talk about fingering or something i cross my legs lol. but i mean i quickly learned all the dirty things...i have a open relationship with my parents, and i think thats one of the reasons that i have been slow with my sexual progression. my first kiss was like a month before my 16th birthday.

it can only give you the words of that moment. that day, the way your relationsihp was at THAT TIME. but i dont think a picture can TRULY show your relationship. but it sure can bring back a flood of memories...and you remember how you would observe every little detail of their face that slowly becomes unfamiliar. o no, now im doing it!! lol...and im actually back with my ex and it still feels like this.

see in my case...my ex of 9 months (our only relationship for both of us) 6 months after the breakup are in this arrangement where ok...if we fee llike it we feel like it. but there is no going aroudn with other people or what not. i will admit wiht us its not a straight up booty call, and there isnt SEX lol fooling around. but ya i mean ive noticed that when he doesnt msg me or whatever i do feel a little hurt. its impossible to like osmeone and not like them, at least as a girl. but with this arrangement you cannot be upset if there were no "rules" established. but you should talk to her about it so you know exactly whta you both want.