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Alabama

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Everything posted by Alabama

  1. Alabama
    It seems that the older we get, love becomes an increasing importance for us, because we are tired of being alone. That is what I've heard and observed. The only key way to finding someone you like and who will be attracted to you, is to socialize. That is what I've realised after a long hard look at my life. As for lack of apetite, could this possibly be caused by an particular kind of stress? It is good that you're at least relieving this idea through message board RPG's, as it can be fun to play another character. As for your writing project, I hope that goes well. You mentioned that you feel you're becoming stressed about other's emotional reactions around you. People vary in thier moods and just because someone reacts strongly to what you say or do, does not mean that they hate you. I've felt that before, and it was stupid. Sometimes, people just aren't in the best of moods at that particular time. So, don't worry about that. Many times, it's all in our heads. It's good that you've decided to vent your problems. Getting them out in the open can help others give you advice to solve them and life can go on. Trust me, you're doing the right thing.
  2. Alabama
    You'll learn mostly by living by yourself. I've just had about a year of College and this helped me a great deal become more responsible. All it takes is clear thinking and the oppurtunity to do things by yourself for a change. You'll do fine. Good luck.
  3. Alabama
    I don't have allergies, but I tend to job in a neighborhood and yes there are lots of plants.
  4. Alabama
    I just returned from jogging, and although I was of course sweating, I was sneezing, too. I've never had this happen before...what could have caused this, out of curiosity?
  5. Alabama
    Okay, so you want to handle this situation with delicate ease. I suggest simply telling the person that even though you have tried to be polite in finding different ways of hanging out with them, that they are annoying you (don't yell, not a good idea) and that you would appreciate if they could find time to hang out. If this doens't work, then feel free to be more direct.
  6. Alabama
    Yes, see if you can find from a reliable source if the guy is interested in you at all. Though it may seem silly, it's not that bad of a way to solve this little dilema.
  7. Alabama
    I agree with the top two posters. Move on. This girl says she's interested, but it looks like she wants to keep you interested, no matter what. So, run.
  8. Alabama
    Why it is that I found it, when I wasn't interested. I was myself. When I socialized and simply was myself, it came to me. And now after a year at College, I now know what I need to do. I need to improve my self-confidence, socialize, and truly be myself. I know there are no guarentees and that finding love is no guarentee in finding "true" happiness. But my life is finally really starting to come together and am happy with that and who I am. So, I shall continue to be happy, even if I never do find what is I seek...
  9. Alabama
    A good way to concentrate on what YOU want, is to do things that you enjoy. Do you have any hobbies or interests you like? These would definitely help. Your happiness is the main reason for finding what you truly want and concentrate on that. You will get rid of this obession, but remember, it will take time to heal your wounds. But once your past the pain, than things will become better.
  10. Alabama
    I suggest just think things over. Think how you can improve yourself, so you won't have to depend on friends so much. I felt like that once and it sucks. But I just thought of ways I can enjoy myslef alone and ways I can have friends, but not feel too needy. It takes time. That I can definitely tell you.
  11. Alabama
    I see. It can be hard to let go, especially when it seems your only just seems to leave your life all of a sudden. I suggest try to make other friends. I know it will not be that simple, especially when you seem to cling to this past. But is there any chance he's returning? You don't have to go alone in life and you can make frieinds to help you go in life. But Remember him. As long as he exists in your memory for now, than you do not have to let go...yet.
  12. Alabama
    It is best to speak with your heart, if you disagree with someone on something. I know you like to be kind, but it also good that people understand that you are your own person. As for another way of not losing yourself, perhaps get involved in things you like. Are any sports or clubs that would interest you? To keep your self-dignity, it is best not to neccesarily think about the other person (though this may sound selfish, it isn't), but think how you would feel about a certain topic. It is always good to be considerate of course, but it is equally important to think about your self for a change.
  13. Alabama
    Thanks everyone! Your advice was very appreciated!
  14. Alabama
    I know. After my Junior year of high school, I just gave up on love, but then some girls all of a sudden liked me my Senior year of high school....it was weird. I had no interest in any of them, but it taught me that things aren't hopeless as I thought they once were. So, if it doens't happen to my then, and it might not, then I'm not going to be crushed. Thanks.
  15. Alabama
    I've denied myself the most important thing I want...but I'm going to try anyway. I want to gain self-confidence in myself. So, I took an RA position to help me deal with people socially and better prove to myself that I can do things well. (An RA is responsible for the residents on his dorm floor). Also I've decided to really push myself in my study of Japanese and then will take a study abroad trip...but then my Senior year, I think I'm going to try...to finally get a girlfriend. It's been hard to deal with myself, but I know that is not healthy and isolation only makes things worse. But I know if I gain self-confidence then I'll have a better chance than I would have had before. Sorry, I just wanted to vent.
  16. Alabama
    What is that you feel you have to alone in life? You can post it or if you don't want to, you can PM me and we'll talk.
  17. Alabama
    I was very shy at one point, and still am to a certain degree. You will never completely get over your shyness, but the way I improved it was just kept trying to talk to people. Many time I would think negative thoughts and this would ruin my concentration. Just keep trying. As you stated you are yourself in certain scenarios, what makes you act like yourself then? Try to think of why and then apply that same idea to public situations. Don't worry if you get embarrassed, or think that you're an idiot of you speak too much, etc. This is all perfectly normal. It will take time to get over your shyness, but it's possible.
  18. Alabama
    Very nice. I like your message of how far you would go to search for the person whom you have lost.
  19. Alabama
    I definitely think so. But I do agree that boundaries must be set, otherwise people might develop feelings and that could ruin the friendship.
  20. Alabama
    I think she's just trying to be playful. Maybe if you ask her seriousely than she might finally answer you, but right now she is having too much fun I am sure confusing you two. So, when you do get a chance to talk with her 1 on 1, then ask her.
  21. Alabama
    I'm actually the opposite. I don't really care to follow "traditional" male roles or duties that a man has to fulfill. Personally, I find it all BS and think that just because is of a particular gendar doens't mean they have to act that way. We are all individuals and should act as who we are, not just follow some rules that a man has to do. But that's my opinion.
  22. Alabama
    You're at least trying, that's the important thing. I'm guessing he's just too nervous to approach you and will avoid you, because he's probably afraid (sometimes we become afraid of people we like, because we don't want to cause them pain). As far as what you can do, you've tried on several different occasions to approach him and if he hasn't even come and talked to you yet, it's possible his nervousness won't go away yet. I suggest just concentrate on your exams for now, and maybe try one last time to attempt to talk to this guy. Good luck.
  23. Alabama
    Yes, he would definitely get what you wanted to say to him for a long time. Smiling helps too, because it shows that you are really interested. I am sure things will go well if you decide to "step up to the plate" or so to speak. Good luck.
  24. Alabama
    What kind if issues are you dealing with that are so painful? I don't have much info. on the teen issue hotline, but I am sure it would be a good as place as any to help you cope with your problems.
  25. Alabama
    Wow. Well, this is probably very painful for you to hear: but you have to face the truth. You need to tell the person whom you have loved for all these years and about this child. And your husband! If you haven't loved him for these past 16 years truly, than why are you still married to him? You need to tell him the truth. It is not good in life to live a life of lies. It will only bring you more pain than anything. If you want to stay with the man that you truly love in your heart, than tell him this and face the truth. If you do decide to finally accept and face the truth, it will be a long and painful road, I'm road. But won't it be better than the life you've been living now?
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