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Stingseed

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  1. Stingseed
    I am back with my ex. I wanna tell yu that you must tak it slow. Let her see the new you. Sorry all for now have to get to work...
  2. Stingseed
    I must say leave her alone for awhile and she will make a choice. You cannot force her to make the choice. This is hard but I must say that you need to let her go. Sorry this is not what you want to hear but asking questions right now will not help good luck
  3. Stingseed
    Muneca Would you say this applies to woman who cheat on men? I mean I ask cause I think in this case when a woman cheats then the woman should chase if she really lwould want the ex back.. just a question
  4. Stingseed
    DG Listen. Me and my ex are trying to get back together as well. You know you are pushing to hard let her go. Next time she asks you if you want to hang out let her know that you would not feel confortable about doing so because she is seeing some other guy and see what she says to that. DG my ex girl and I spent time together this weekend and she admitted some things positive things to me as far as getting back together, but in the end it is just words. I would say until your girl shows you some sure signs don't let her invite you anywhere. She wants the best of both worlds and that just can't happen. Remember show her you are a person who respects themselves.. I am on the same boat DG My girl tells me things like I just dont know why I cant let go og him. So until then she does not deserve me. Same should go for you and your ex, but in doing so do not place your life on pause...ok?
  5. Stingseed
    Let me get this straight Dylan she describe to you the details of her and some guys encounter? That is totally uncalled for If this is the case. I know this might not be what you want to hear but you need to get away from her. Don't tell her any details as to why you are doing it rather just tell her you need time alone and that she need to respect this. If she is someone who loves you she would have not descibe to you the details of anything. She will come to a conclusion that you are a good person to her and thereforeeee come looking for you. Also I would not be waiting for her to come around rather work on yourself make yourself happy and look for things to do that you have not done in a while. Don't worry about her she will realize her mistakes . One more things when she starts to come around to pick up the first few calls and definatly don't take the call if you feel you cant handle them. Hope this helps....
  6. Stingseed
    the best thing you an be doing is working on yourself. He will notice perhaps he is being stubborn in a way. Looks to me like he will soon make a move as to locking up again
  7. Stingseed
    I agree continue no contact. I am myself trying to get my ex back but chasing never works out. Support does when they call. Time will tell all.
  8. Stingseed
    TWILIGHT I must tell you that you should not try to figure what in his head. I myself tried to figure whats in my ex head. The answer is you can never figure out what in there head the fact is he misses you, and its up to him to mend to relationship like mentioned before. I were you do what I did figure what's in your head. Would you really like to have him back or are you lying to yourself? Long at it long term is what you want for correct and one more thing to remember if you do get back would the fact that your ex cheated on you bother you and open wounds again? I suggest really work on yourself to forgive, but to forget is harder. I know this is not the answer that you looked for but it is something you must face. I for example have forgiven but even though I dont bring it up when we do talk I still have not forgotten, and it seems like she is really coming around now but I find it harder to forget.
  9. Stingseed
    Wow I have come a long way from this last post. First I must admit foolishness by my part no insight before. Thank goodness for this sight I have come to realize that I do need my ex, but would like her back. Minimal contact has let me see things more clearly now. If she has to voluntary come back to me, and it is her decsion to me not I. She knows she is losing a good man she must realize this before it is to late. There is a small window of opportunity for her now but not for long. As for my next move I will just continue to apply minimal contact which has made her come around now. Soon I will ask her to join me somewhere see what she says. At that point we will talk about the realtionship. Only why back to is take a step back and look at it from afar then and only then will you realize is this person it and is this person worth my love..
  10. Stingseed
    that is the way no contact should be used to improve yourself. During this time you should not worry about pushing them away cause of NC. I am glad that you decided to settle down. You will need this to show that you are somenew and spark her interest.
  11. Stingseed
    perhaps you should call him and talk to him and then let him bring it up why he calls you at that point you mention that you are not mad at him no more thereforeeee he will be opening up and letting you know with a little persuation. And in the end you respond with what you wanna say whether it si closure or giving it another try. Either way this may go I feel this will bring the mystery to an end. But make sure you tell him what you feel in your heart. Like someone said already in this topic sometimes people deserve another chance. I have forgiven my ex for cheating on me and she knows this not by me telling her I forgave her but by me not bringing it up at all in the 2 months of minimal contact I have shown her. Not once. There is something I feel I should tell you. I think you want your ex back to be honest with you. Just talk to the ex she what happens.
  12. Stingseed
    Daisy. Yes guys like a challenge especially sense he got so close. I agree with ziggy's last post. And yes it might apply some pressure ziggy, but on the other hand do you agree that it still applies pressure in a sense that I am still interested in her without asking or telling her?
  13. Stingseed
    Hello Rich I understand what you are going through and although not the same situation My ex cheated one me and still seeing the fling. But seeing other people is definatly the route to choose. It will make nc much easier. I would not to shut her out completely take a call once in a while if nothing said about the realtionship then make an excuse and hang up. You have great with this gal and she needs to notice this first then she will come to her senses. This is were yours and mines are similar my ex is with someone else like I said but mentions to me she wishes I would goto the places she is going to with her instead of the fling, calls him my name as such ,but is afraid of me accepting her again the same so you see she is confused and scared of coming back to me. Best thing for you to do is to let her come to her senses on her own.
  14. Stingseed
    I agree there is no set time could be 1 month or 4 but the important thing is that you wotk on yourself to show them you dont need them and that they made a mistake in letting you go.
  15. Stingseed
    exactly like i advice that I willbe in the position to make a choice not needed her in the end. Now I must also let you guys know that I mentioned to her that actions speak louder than words and thereforeeee letting here know in that one phrase that she must make a move soon.
  16. Stingseed
    Now I must tell you that I have seen this same tatic in another break up with a frined of mine trying to get his ex back. And it worked to perfection. Basically my friend dropped the same lines to his ex she felt that she had to push a little for him to start talking again now his plan was workring to perfection. He was concerned that she would not take him back so this led him to use this tactic( basically it get the ex thinking that they should start chasing again thereforeeee opening up and leave yourself unguarded )the ex then opened up and left her basically accpting his demands in the end and yes they got back together only for my friend to dump her again. Now I must say to go ahead to call him and see if he picks up and talks to you see what he has to say let him bring up the relationship. Dont fall into the trap of you calling more than him. But by all means if you feel you are ready give him a nudge. Just alsways keep your guard up
  17. Stingseed
    I must agree . My ex popped me the question if I would like to take her back I responded yes honestly here is important. But If I go back and start calling her more now than I have in the past 2 months of minimal contact then all I will end up doing is pushing her away again. I am finding this out now reason being is that 2 days after she asked the direct question I had my phone off. She left me a message I did not return call till 2 days after that maybe a mistake maybe not but I started to call about every 2 days and what did it get me absolutely nothing she never picked up except for once. Now I asked myself perhaps she made a move on the fling and let him go thereforeeee needing transition time for herself, but no certainty in that. The point her is that I made the mistake and dropped my guard calling her every 2 days but what I should have done was let her keep calling me to prove to me that her question was genuine as for now I dont know if it is cause of my mistake..
  18. Stingseed
    I too have a question on this subject. I am doing minimal contact for 2 months now and she still calls me. As of recently she has called to let me know how she thinks of me when she is with the other and also to let me know that she feels she is with the wrong person when they goto the beach or in those means. Now Like I said they must miss us I have shown her I am moving on most of the times I let her know that I cannot talk cause I have friends over or exercising etc... Now this has led to her asking me if I would like to have her back in which I responded honestly saying (yes I would) she replied by saying it will happen sooner than I think. Now I am confused about time lenght in no contact should I continue or pop a question? So I too am confused when to spring into action
  19. Stingseed
    you are both on the same page now. I have joined that page as well not to long ago. My ex dumped me for another guy. Now 3 months later she still calls me for simples questions and at time to let me know she thinks of me and what not. I in return tell her that these thoughts of hers are nice but actions speak louder than words and leave it at that. She in return tells me she is not onones gf. I dont even go into that with her until it is something I wanna hear. My point is that I agree with you guys and it is the best way to move on or get them back. I applaud you guys. When they feel like they lost you then they will make there decesion as wheather to come back or not but by then whcih ever the case may be we are ready for eiterh road. Nice work guys.
  20. Stingseed
    Ziggy I have a question for you. Fromt he people that you know that got back together did any of them cheat on another? And is 3 months of the dumper seeing someone else to long but they still calling...?
  21. Stingseed
    sf I know what you are going throught right at this moment. I was there not to long ago. By the way you are sounding I would wait a bit more say another 2 weeks. This is a delicate situation and remember you must really make sure that you will be able to take anything that comes out of her mouth the good and the bad. Like I said I went through it myself not to long ago. Over a period of about 2 months I did not call her but I did answer some of her calls and only till just recently I picked up the phone and called her. Now at that point I seriously thought I was in control of my emotions and would not faulter but believe me it was much harder than I thought. I almost did faulter but did not (thank goodness) I maintained and had a positive conversation that I was in control of. Just watch your step SF remember it is the first call that is hardest. Hope this helps..
  22. Stingseed
    Hello Daisy I think you are doing well. Keep to your game plan. Steve is right about the bad days they serve a purpose. I am going throught the same situation she contacts me and tells me in many ways how she dreams, thnks and misses me and how she calls the guy she is seeing my name by accident and all, but in the end actions speak louder than words and I let her know this. Daisy like you I am maintain patient and letter her come to me like you should continue to do. Again don't change your game plan and if something does happen in the case you find someone to date then by all means go for it. Remember you are number one work on yourself if he happens to come along then it is a bonus. Your ex like mine as to realize that we were good to them and also that we are not there puppets to play with our emotions like this. Take it slow and remember if it was meant to be it will be.
  23. Stingseed
    I would suggest when the OP contacts you again not to take his call. Let him really figure thigs out this Yo-Yo game this person is doing to you is not what you want. You must think of yourself first. Look out for yourself and don't let no one mistreat you like this. By not taking his calls you will make choose sooner than later and at the same time he will respect you and not continue YO-YO game. Hope this helps
  24. Stingseed
    You must be honest with her. Probably at first she may want some time alone from you and you must respect this. I must say like dragonlady it is the reverse thing for me too. Being sincere is the best things you have as a formula to get her back.
  25. Stingseed
    I would do the same too. Start something new. Dont bring up the old relationship at all. She is hinting to you which a very good thing if you ask me hint something positive back. Perhaps yopu should talk about things you are planning in the future. Remember women like confident men. Set something up like alight date and see how she reacts. Chances are she will open up to you more and thereforeeee you will see other things that have gone wrong in the old relationship so you will not commit the same mistakes..
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