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GeeCee

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  1. GeeCee
    Determined You have received a response to your message. You do not really need to respond to hers. It does not require one. Whether you want to or not is a different matter. You will make the right decision for yourself. G xx
  2. GeeCee
    Ok guys, call off the FBI and hand me a trophy now please. I have survived the humiliation of being dumped by my heart's desire and a trip to IKEA. I am, indeed, superwoman!!! Oh IKEA was, of course, wonderful. And I now have even more scented candles and shiney new candle-holders than I did at this time yesterday!!! Oh, and a beautiful but pointless baby-blue rug, some shelves that I really don't need, pointless vases and ornaments to fill the shelves, and some mirrors, so we can admire exactly how FABULOUS we all are fast becoming!!!!! Today was a good day. I was busy, had to go into work (have been off for the last week), and got a lot done. And then of course racing down the M1 gives you little time to think (especially when you are trying to remember where all the speed cameras are located!). So tonight I shall put up shelves and mirrors, and that should keep me very very busy, and then I will fall into bed shattered and dream of beautiful things! How are you all doing? G xx P.S. I am a mad woman on a mission at the moment! My house is spotless and my lawn is perfectly mowed, bushes are pruned and tomorrow I am decorating my dining room - red, cerise and cream if you were wondering! Who could possibly find the time to date at the moment!?!?!?!!? P.P.S. Shiny Toaster - thanks for your comments. I am glad that you are finding some peace with your decision. Life can only get better and better for you.
  3. GeeCee
    DaisyB I am really happy for you. You seem to have a really good perspective on what is going on. I still think that you are in a really good situation. It is great that he is now feeling comfortable enough to contact you so regularly. What you are doing is exactly right - no pressure, keeping the talk light and friendly. These guys can be a little skittish, and it seems the slightest sudden movement scares them off. So keeping things deliberate and calm should go a long way to making them feel safe and secure. Keep us posted on any further updates. G xx
  4. GeeCee
    Good for you Rich!!! You said what you wanted to say in a really calm and collected fashion. I really think that now you have to see what she is willing to do to move closer towards you. You have told her how you feel, and what she can do to remedy the situation. Now allow her the time and space to act on this. Well done. G xx
  5. GeeCee
    Ok, here I am in my ninth day of NC. In the past, the longest we have gone is 10 days, and the ex broke that. I had thought that I was going to call him today, to ask how he was. But have still not made a decision. Shall see how I feel later. For now, I am on a shopping frenzy at the moment, and off to the wonderful world of IKEA!!! How are the rest of you doing? Spatz (I know that you are feeling bad, but perhaps you will find some clarity in the latest turn of events?), Dikaia (guessing the boss is back!), SincerelyHurt (made any progress with your Unicorn?), Majord (still eating chocolate?) and finally Beec (still kicking butt?!?!). Shall report back in later tonight for any further updates! G xx
  6. GeeCee
    So Determined What Michael has said is nothing that you have not already said to yourself. So, here you make a decision. Can you continue to harbour these feelings for someone who persistently does nothing to assuage your pain. Or can you move on? The biggest problem, is that all of us on here are saying that we have been able, quite readily, to let go of exes in the past, and often they have come back to us. What is the problem this time? Oh who bloody knows the answer to that one? You are getting on with your life. You move forward, and then you go back 100 steps with an unrequited text message. Who can understand what they are thinking? It takes nothing but common courtesy to respond to a message. Try not to be so harsh on yourself. Try and continue doing what you have been doing so well. Building up your life, fulfilling yourself. If, when you go back to university, she suddenly decides that she wants to be with you, you might find that you are in a different place, or you might find that it all falls into place. Who knows? Just have faith that it will be good in the long run, and it will be good. G xx
  7. GeeCee
    Stick with it D, every now and then there is a chink of light in the darkness. Don't be so hard on yourself. We have all sent of a text message that has gone unreplied. Personally, I am in your camp on this, I think that it is downright rude. Keep your head high. You know that you will come out of this OK. G xx
  8. GeeCee
    Hey you I am sorry that things did not go as I know you were hoping for them to. Spatz, I think that you said too much too soon. The problem is that we get so excited at the slightest positive sign, that we start acting like rabid dogs. You said what you said, and now lets deal with it. No point torturing yourself with the whys and wherefores. So what to do, what to do? I don't know Spatz. Surely there has to be time to stop playing games. What you need to do is, I think, build up your self-confidence. You are feeling shattered and emotional. You need to look after yourself. Only you can make the call as to whether you go over there today, but I would be very cautious about doing this. In some way, you can right some of last nights behaviour off to drink. Going over there today will remind her of last night's conversation. But, you have to do what you think is best. I know how you feel Spatz, Jesus, do I know. But you have got to get yourself into a situation where you can deal with this girl without emotion. That means that you will need to distance yourself from her. I know that this is the last thing that you want to do at the moment. Give yourself time and space, Spatz, and you might find that gives you clarity. Talk soon. G xxcan
  9. GeeCee
    And so we are back. Have had an enjoyable couple of days and eaten lots of easter eggs - fantastic. I have quietly slipped into my eighth day of no contact. Hmmmm - no idea whether this is a good or bad thing! Good to see Kathyk back - I am soooooo pleased that your guy is continuing to be a gem. This is wonderful news. Keep us posted on new developments. So ... how was it for the rest of you? G xx
  10. GeeCee
    Welcome back Spartan!!!! G xx
  11. GeeCee
    Hi Jafreak First of all, I would like to commend your actions. You are right, this is not going to be easy, but the delights you will experience with Charlie will always negate the difficulties. From a personal point of view, I would think that you have to tell Charlie the truth as soon as he can understand it. I found out that I was adopted when I was 13, not the best age (when is), and not at the best time - I was at boarding school and my parents were abroad at the time. I think your biggest difficulty, surely, though is going to be explaining to Charlie who his natural father is. Personally, I would not presume to advise on this forum, I would recommend that you seek professional counsel in this regard. If I understand you correctly, Charlie was conceived as a result of rape? I don't know how you are going to explain the circumstances of his conception, or the lack of presense of his 'father figure'. I hope that ultimately Rob's father can grow to form some attachment to Charlie. Good luck to all of you. G xx
  12. GeeCee
    HELLO ALL ... This damn forum is soooooo addictive. I could not resist. Just could not resist, and so here I am posting my news. Hope that you are all having a lovely Easter holiday and that you have had your fill of chocolate (personally that is an impossibility for me, as I never do!). On a whim, I decided to come to France for a couple of days. Wonderfully accented French men who smoke and drink excessively and have cornered the marked in the art of flirting - what more could I want!!! So I told my children that we were going on an adventure. My son was very excited. Are there snakes? he asked eagerly. Er no honey. Rhinocerous? No, none of those, sweetheart. Lions and tigers? Won't be seeing too many of those either. Hmmm... then why are we going, he demanded? My daughter is looking for anything with a designer label on it! And me, I am practising my French and drinking and smoking like a true Parisian! So there are many distractions - oooooh and they are gorgeous. I went out with my friend last night to a chic little bar and we had a wonderful time. Lots of tall dark and handsome types certainly tend to take your mind of life's troubles. But it is temporary. No matter .... it is a healing process, and healing takes time. And then this evening, we were walking by the beach, and went into a little restaurant. And there was a man, I was aware of a man and his gaze. And there was some locking of eyes and non-verbal communication. And you know, being that I was a foreigner and all, he made his way over to talk to me. And of course, I need to practise my French, and what a great opportunity. So, there was some chatting and flirting and yummy eye contact and that scrummy feeling you get in your stomach when you feel the beginnings of desire rumbling. And these made me forget the ex and the thought I had earlier that the whole place was full of lovers looking too damned happy!!! So, yes the delightful French-man insisted in walking us back to the hotel, it was the courteous thing to do. And this being France, it was waaaay to early to not have a further drink, which we did, and again and again. And there was much laughter and frivolity and it felt very good indeed. Light and easy. And so .... it has been fun, for a day, I have laughed with my friend, I have walked on the beach with my children, I have spoken lots of French. Oh .... and I kissed a gorgeous French man - and it was all good! Tomorrow is always another day! How is the Easter holiday going for you guys? G xx P.S. I look like a Very Important Person, in the hotel lobby with my laptop - perhaps an executive from Warner Brothers, someone with a Hight Profile at the Geneva Convention?!?!?!?!!? Little do they know ..... P.P.S. Thank you Scout, what lovely words. Flattery like that will mean we INSIST that you join our little club!!!
  13. GeeCee
    LostinVan What a poignant day that you shared with your ex. I am glad that you put aside all games for the day and respected your mother and yourselves. It seems appropriate to me that she was the one to share the day with you. Telling your ex that you love her, kissing her and being kissed by her - who said that these were against the rules? These were the result of tender emotions. Neither of you should be denied them. I wish you continued success in your quest. G xx
  14. GeeCee
    Don't be sorry, and don't stop posting. You have a concern and you would like advice, this is the best place to be. Take advice as it is offered, sometimes you will not like it and sometimes you will not like people's comments. But do keep posting, please. As with regards your ex. Well there really are a lot more variables than just the money issue. Her parents being racist, I guess you are alluding to the fact that this is an interracial relationship? Well this could put a very different spin on things. Try and talk to her, arrange a date, and see where the two of you both stand now. You are suspicious of her motives, now find out whether you are right to be. Good luck. G xx
  15. GeeCee
    Confusio Well I am sorry, I do not want to speak out of turn here and I will phrase my words as carefully as I can, but I do have a lot of thoughts. So, somehow or other, you have 'found' yourself and decided that you never loved your wife and you would like to turn yourself around and rid yourself of your old life. Any self-improvement that one undertakes is to be highly commended, but please let us remember that you wife is a person who has dedicated a large proportion of her adult life to you and a marriage. What can you possible gain by telling her that it was all based on nothing? By all means, get on with your life, leave your marriage, do whatever you need to do, but please don't crush someone else in the process. Whether you loved your wife or not, is irrelevant now. In bettering yourself, I can see no reason for you to trample on someone elses possible dreams and desires. Good luck. G xx
  16. GeeCee
    Rich You should call her. You have played her game and made your changes. You have played your game and made your changes. You should call her - this waiting game is not doing you or her any good. If it was part of the problem of your previous relationship, make a change and break the cycle. Talk to her. G xx
  17. GeeCee
    Oh Dikaia ... am so glad that you are back to posting your most profound Dikaisms!!! Happy Easter to all of you!
  18. GeeCee
    SincerelyHurt I am constantly amazed by your words, your turn of phrase, your eloquency. It shows a man of great compassion, desire and tenderness. Don't lose sight of that. Dikaia You are soooo young and so open to love - it will come to you when you least expect it. And please - your Dikaiasm's - we all need more!! Much more!! G xx
  19. GeeCee
    Yes, you are right. Her pain cannot compare to yours. I am sorry. There is no comparison. G xx
  20. GeeCee
    Dikaia, SincerelyHurt - you guys, you guys! I love you so much. I was having an away day from this - just kind of hiding away - and I peek back - and there you both are. That is a very comforting feeling. SincerelyHurt - you ARE right, that look DOES suit you!!! G xx
  21. GeeCee
    Spartan 1 Thanks for your PM. Well well well, even the superior Spartan's feel their confidence ebb away every now and then. You know that this is a temporary thing. You know that this will pass. You know that this fear and panic grips us all at times. At times. Of course there are times that you want your old life, and the love of your wife, but I am sure that there are times that you are happy with your new life, you have detailed some of the physcial developments you have made (they sound very nice, by the way), no doubt there have been positive emotional developments too. Of course dating is a scarey prospect. It is also exciting and dangerous. There is the excitement that you could meet your next future soulmate, a great shag or simply someone that you enjoy spending time with and have a good laugh. Some dates will be dreadful (remind me to tell you fo teh man who turned up in his gardening clothes), and some dates will leave your head spinning when you get home. Some are mid-way between the two. YOu know what you have to do. Keep make changes and adjustements to your new life and take each day as it comes. You are a good, good person, your ex-wife will not be able to strip that from you. PM me any time, vent on here any time. People will help you through this, as you have done with many others. Good luck. G xx P.S. Those super-confident women? We're not always as confident as we look!!!
  22. GeeCee
    Dikaia and SincerelyHurt Thanks for missing me. Was kind of keeping a low profile today. Am ok - hating the no contact thing, but revelling in the power it gives you too, in a bizarre sort of way. Am pleased that I no longer have a desire to check the batteries in my cell phone or house phone any longer. Oh it hurts like bollocks. But what to do, what to do? Have definitely made a decision that NC will be the way to go for teh next month. So, nothing much more to say at the moment. Shall be back to offer support and seek it when I feel desperate, if that is ok, guys? G xx
  23. GeeCee
    Justice Thanks for your PM. Well, this is very tricky. Your ex is clearly very hurt and very stubborn. I don't know what more to advise. I think that you need to arrange a face-to-face and discuss this the whole situation with the ex, calmly and rationally. She cannot accept that this is reasonable behaviour. Beyond that, you will have to make the decision as to whether she is worth fighting for. Good luck. G xx
  24. GeeCee
    You know what, SincerelyHurt, she hurts too. It may not feel that way, but be sure that she does. It is interesting, though, that she is reaching out for you as soon as you are letting go. I think Majord summed it up nicely when he said 'Women ... can't live with them ... can't shoot them!' I will check mail and reply. G xx
  25. GeeCee
    I disagree with Heb here. I think that generall we are in it for both! Now, what seems hypocritical here is that he is fine having straight sex with you, no matter how many partners, and yet he cannot go down on you!! He is fine knowing that you have presumably given head to others, and more than happy to go where others have gone before!! I don't this guy is being honest with you, and that would red flag any relationship issues for me. I agree with SLBG. Play the same game he does! Let's see how he likes that! G xx
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