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mikeca

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Everything posted by mikeca

  1. mikeca
    Ya..its hard to see the future when your crushed by something thats now "your past" but you'll be ok..its been 6weeks nc for me and ive come along way, and I look forward to hearing about you healing. Were all here to listen for you.
  2. mikeca
    thats the thing after a break up, you have to stop putting her/him first..and put yourself for a change.
  3. mikeca
    I hope you can find substance in all the advice we've given, but in the end its you who can only judge the final outcome, I wish you well in your decision.
  4. mikeca
    were in different situations, I was I guess "overly" showing my affections, I did all the sweet stuff...flowers to her play practice, dropped little notes in her car, left a rose under her winshield/door and we still broke up, its a weird thing I thought I was doing everything right
  5. mikeca
    ...my suggestion would be to do something really romantic, on a new "first date" im talking like movie-idea big as long as you can really back it up.
  6. mikeca
    I know how you feel, im finally getting my stuff together so I can apply to be a officer, and every time I take a new step I just wanna call her and tell her all about it, but then i realize its over so...nope.
  7. mikeca
    to me I think there would be a transitional period where you feel akward with someone you felt so close with but then they just up and lefted one day, when you spend more time you can slowly let your guard down again and judge whether its worth it.
  8. mikeca
    I think you did a great job on the initial contact after NC. My thoughts toward this are *if* he replys to your last email you might be able to work past the things that bothered each other, that is if you feel everything has changed for the better. If he doesnt you just keep moving forward, 9months is a long time so you've been doing great.
  9. mikeca
    After you get over that initial hump its only going to get easier...sure tho there will be a few pot holes...6weeks NC here.
  10. mikeca
    hmm I like the idea of re-living the courtship...you should get some flowers or something sweet and ask her our on a "first date" again...then you can relive some of that chemistry that was between to the two of you in the first place.
  11. mikeca
    well little update to my previous post. I recently had a little rebound fling with somone I met, she was from out of town but we clicked right away. I knew this was going to be temp thing because she would be moving back within 2 weeks. Being with someone else has given me some prospective on my past relationship. I realized alot of things I was doing was just giving in instead of being myself. Its definitely made me all the more wiser.
  12. mikeca
    i dont know if its just me but this reminds me of a ransom... "do this or this will never happen!" To me I think you should be honest. Thats the only way to get the trust back, if your truly sorry for the trust issues to begin with you must let her know and possibly show her how trusting you can be.
  13. mikeca
    I had a similar story...my friend was many of us who liked this girl. but she liked him the best so they ended up dating..so 2 years passes and they breakup, she's talking to me alot about it and after a month I realize my feelings for her...I never acted on them until she said she figured it out that I cared for her. We never went forward with anything but looking back I feel like such an * * * * * * * to my friend for doing that. We ended up becoming best friends and I even then dated his sister. What a weird world.. :S
  14. mikeca
    I had to delete my ex her msn names were driving me crazy right after the breakup...heres some samples "you can only rely on yourself" "name + name = mad sex" "Guys Suck" just to name a few.
  15. mikeca
    haha I enjoyed that post especially "Oh dear, what have I done ??"
  16. mikeca
    I've been doing very good on the NC with my ex. 5 weeks now. But now thoughts are starting to creep into my head. we first met 1 year ago last week and now this week is where we shared our first kiss last year..its weird its like there a smell in the air thats bringing me back to every moment we shared during our initial meetings. I look outside and almost feel im back in 2005 like she's just going to be calling sometime. Its just slowly eating at me. I had the same dream I had when we first broke up. almost completely the same. she comes crying to me and wants me back but somethings moving me away and I cant close the gap. I just guess this last couple of days kinda shook my confidence. I know that dream did.
  17. mikeca
    this isnt from my experience. but i'll pass this info along. MY bestfriend was in a similar situation where they she called for a break. and during this time he asked her *before they went on a break* what the issues were, just a quick summary. He took each and every word to heart...and the next day called her and reiterated what she said. I agree your right with this etc..not even 3 days later she called and wanted to give it another shot. I'm not sure if this helps but there still together today.
  18. mikeca
    I think me and you lvlyldy have alot in common..I was stressing over my career choices and becoming very clingy and needy. Adding stress to a perfectly healthy relationship..I didnt realize it at the time but we had the same outcome. I've started NC for 5 weeks and have learned so much about my behaviour of late. My thoughts on getting back together have changed also. I would like too but its time for me to lay that dream down. the road where I've had more experience allowed me to realize I wasnt myself. I have to find myself and my career, To be myself again is my goal and if it should extract a gf...new or old..then so be it. Becuase if it is meant to happen it will. Thats all there is too it.
  19. mikeca
    ^ great post. made me change my thought patterns yeah I relapse..she drives a car with a loud muffler....and every time I hear one coming down the street....well you get the idea.
  20. mikeca
    this thread inspired me to have a brief run in with the ex. I had to goto a place where she works today. So I walk in all smiles, and at first my hearts pounding but then it begins to subside and im my casual self again. We share a few words then I depart..so far it doesnt feel bad, although it has changed my thoughts somewhat.
  21. mikeca
    I think the thread meant NC "Take 2" like the movie thing. I've thought about breaking nc and just giving her a little message on msn...or something. But everytime I do I think of all the pain I have put past me, do i really want that back? I gave myself a solid month to try to get her back, and it didnt work. So now I'm about me. What do I want to do tonight? where do I want to go? And yes everyday is a struggle, and you win and lose sometimes. But in the end your such a stronger individual. for me, take it day by day helped. Then start figuring out thing you've always wanted, and work for it. Cuz that day you have what you want, what else matters?
  22. mikeca
    ok heres the quick scoop. I'm looking to replace one if not both of my jobs. It was a factor in the relationship. And now I just cant work there with everything that happens. Its grocery store, and it was fine when I was in school. But now I need something more. Ok the thing is, my ex works at the local job search place. I've been 1 month NC, 4 months broken up. She's apparently got someone else (just found out today actually through the grapevine) which is stinging a little because it was just past our would-be 1st yr. I'm still up for entertaining the idea of reconciling. i've changed quite a bit, and I'm alot better after the 1 month NC. I'd just like some tips on how to act. I'm also looking at returning to college at the beginning of september. Lets see how this works. I think im going to wait until next week before I go in.
  23. mikeca
    well..my general impression is he's being honest. hes showing his matured and realizes what he's lost. However I wouldnt jump back on the relationship train right away. i'd advise to take it slow...keep letting him show how much you mean to him. Then when it feels right again...thats when you take a chance.
  24. mikeca
    ya after some thinking if my ex ever comes back into my life acting like that...I have a few words for her it has to be genuine or bust
  25. mikeca
    We've had alot in common lately it seems. my ex broke it off with me in the beginning of march and she was my first love. Emotions werent an issue however as friends they would resurface. Theres a general rule of thumb that it takes half of the relationship to get over it. (1yr = 6months) I had a bit of a rebound with someone who was only in town for a week. And I am shy guy but after this relationship its given me alot of confidence. So my advice is when you can meet and talk to someone new without thinking of you ex. If you and that person can talk and have fun but dont think of things that have happened in the past remember now, this is your future.
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