sadCara
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Everything posted by sadCara
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Expectations is something you can have of people who are very very close to you, even then you have to be careful about it. Sometimes people who you think they are. I try not to have high expectations for people, more often than not they will fall below. Just accept them, and have no expectations. Expectations lead to disappointment. And not valuing people enough.
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That was some really good stuff! I was feeling down now, and this perked me up a little. Women don't need men!
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It used like that for me too. He didn't want to talk as much anymore. Felt tired and didn't want to meet.... That was my 2 1/2 yr relationship which recently fizzled away for many reasons.... Ne-way, I hate to say this but I think the person is either getting so used to you, that they take you for granted, or they are losing interest. Discussing doesn't help much except make you emotional and him irritated. You need to decipher what this means for yourself. Get more clues, or try to talk to him, open him up a little.
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My story and how I think I made things worse..
sadCara replied to brokenjerseyheart's topic in Breaking Up Advice
First of all, thanks for sharing your feelings. I do hope it was therapeutic for you. I can tell you love this woman very much, it's like she is your driving motivation for life. I honestly think you should just give her, her space. She seems quite confused about the relationship. Like she is weighing the past against the present and the future. You do need to put yourself together, which you have started doing. Just continue working on yourself. It seems like you'll both need to work on your own lives for now. Fix things up and feel secure in your place in life. You did pursue her a bit too much, be friends with her. Find that old niche back again, where you'll were comfortable with one another. Things will work out from there. I can suggest please don't put any more pressure on her to get back together. You have done a lot in that department already, now it's her turn. So give her time to respond. As for the profile about her dating, yes I can see that must really hurt. Move past it and focus on you. You need that and so does she. Good luck and let me know how everything is going. -
Hi Sea Bisquit I'm guessing by your post that you don't want to get back with him, for whatever reason. Just to tell you that r hours is not that far, if you do want to get back with him Yes i know the NC thing is extremely hard, it is a choice you made for betterment of yourself, keep that in mind. Think about yourself for now, because you need to heal.
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There are interesting girls everywhere If you go to university then on your campus. I have been asked out a few times in the library. I admit i found it a tiny bit creepy but just don't be so bold about it. Don't worry, there are girls everywhere.
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I'm happy you'll worked things out, or atleast you'll took the first step to doing so. Your approaching the situation with a good open attitude. That's great. I wish you the best of luck. Yours and hers happiness is the important part whether it works out or not.
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Hope75 you do have a point that she didn't handle the situation maturely. I think that she was really upset that's why she did rash things. I mean to find out that your bf just told you he didn't go out with his ex, when you know he did, hurts. Please send out the e-mail, explain to her everything. She also needs to work on a better way of dealing with conflicts in the relationship, but you two can work on that together.
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It seems like you said she did ask you if you had a date with her. You told her no. In my opinion that is a lie, since you went out with her twice, to you yes she is nothing more than a good friend. But to your gf, she represents a threat, she obviously has feelings for you, which is why she didn't want anyone else getting in the way. You went out with her, technically that is a date. The fact that you didn't tell her that you did go out with her, shows that you wanted to hide it. Now she is wondering why would you want to hide it! Please make amends if this relationship means something to you. Yes it is a major miscommunication. You both need to be open with one another. Be truthful. I hope everything works out.
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Talking about your feelings to someone who is willing to listen is never a waste of time. Talk to her or someone else, just try not to keep your feelings bottled up. I do that alot and it's not good for you. Pm me if you want to talk. I am willing to listen.
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HEEEEELLLPPPP. How do I get him to want me again???
sadCara replied to serena404's topic in Getting Back Together
I'm happy for you, i'm glad your giving this a shot. Best of luck and i hope you are both happy in the end. That is the important part -
Don't worry about it.... You will find someone else. Now you know, before you even asked.
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She's a nice girl that you like and are interested in having a relationship with. You need to learn if she shares the same feelings. Go for it buddy! you have nothing to lose. Good luck!
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I know the whole high school scene is to let each other know how they are feeling, but keeping it friendly. Why don't you call her up, see what's going on and if she wants to get together. One of you has to be direct about it, otherwise you are both going to be in limbo about your relationship. If you feel uncomfortable with that, try feeling around the topic, and seeing how she reacts. Good luck, you've known her so long, she must be a good, sweet girl, so you can't go wrong.
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Girl, you have to get your things back! And those poor animals. I don't know if you want your pets back or not, but there are still issues that need to be dealth with between the two of you, then you gan go back NC. The person above me had the right idea, don't let him step all over your heart. Take charge and fight for yourself.
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If i can be of any help, I'll be there for you.
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I think it would all depend on the history of the person and their stance in my life. If they were a complete stranger most likely i would decide if they're easy to talk to. If they fit the bill of what i like in someone, just on the outside. But mostly i would exchange phone numbers if i'm vaguely interested, and see how conversations go from there. Normally i'm in a rush so there is about a minute of assessment.
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I'm really uncomfortable going to a doctor. My ex and i had protected sex. it's always protected, and we were each other's firsts. I think for now that it was like you said a VERY inconvenient pimple.(it popped! :s) That scared the heck out of me! I'll have to see as time goes on, but thanks for your post.
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I'm so worried right now. This is embarrassing...just saw a little red bump on my vagina. I'm scared about it, never had something weird like this b4. It hurts and the whole area is a bit itchy. I don't have any unusual discharge...actually less... Can anyone please tell me what this could be. HELP!
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Hi there, I am so sorry for your mother. I can't say what is going on with her, only the doctor could. Please don't do anything you really don't want to do. Suicide is not a way out, you need to deal with your problems. It may help you if you don't think about yourself, help others. It would help you to get outside yourself. Life with many good things, the small bads sometimes cast a shadow over everything. But it's just a shadow, the good things in life are still there. Please don't give up hope. Everything will be alright in time, you will see. (Big HUG) If you need to talk to someone, pm me.
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Feeling much better! I'm actually smiling. I've tried to focus on future plans, and also i just feel happier. What a roller coaster ride.
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He said it's a break.. is still coming to see me tomorrow!
sadCara replied to never-too-late's topic in Breaking Up Advice
Your right it is prety clear. That conversation you had with him was very emotional and heartbreaking. Don't worry you will be fine (I guess i'm afraid that my ex one day will say something similar to me) Atleast he is for sure about his decision and VERY clear as to what we both should do after this whole thing... That's something your ex is not doing....I honestly feel he is being unfair to you. He wants YOU to move on with your life, which i definitely think you should. (I'm actually a little mad at him for you!) But he wants to keep that "door" open for himself some years from now. That is cheesy. If you don't want to talk to him, Please don't. I agree he is sending out mixed signals, then getting angry at you for confusing them. He is not sorted out himself, just leave him be. You said the right things to him. As for him making you feel guilty, that was a low blow. Keeping in contact is not your fault, YOU were not being selfish, but extending a line of friendship. I think your a good person so for the sake of yourself, and keeping your emotional health, try NC for a little while. Keep your friends around you. Later on once you feel more secure about youself, you can talk to him again. I really hope YOU feel better. Take care of yourself, remember that this guy is leading you on unnecessarily, don't let him! -
It's been a week now, officially...i just realized it, since we broke up. It's soooo hard. so very hard..... my logical side is battling my emotional side. Sometimes the emotional part gets beat up, and that leads to me becomng self-righteous, and a bit angry. I don't like it when it happens, but i can see how it really helps me when it does. Basically the emotional side says, " he still loves you, i can feel it..." The other more harsher side says, "No! he doesn't love you, get over it, your not that good ne-way. Just move on, and focus on work." i hope now you can see why i am caught up in all these things... I almost wish i didn't have a heart, that i wasn't born into this family, and that most importantly i was born persian, or atleast knew everyhing about it. It's still very hard....i still have hope, i can see it and i don't like it. I know it's not healthy.....I'm still saying why! ...i know, what can you expect it's only been a week, but i haven't hurt this much b4.
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This is a tough situation, i can understand why your confused. I hate to say it, but i don't know if your bf can trust you again. Since you say the other guy is nothing to you. Don't even think about it, leave him be, end whatever you have with him. This life is complicated enough. All you can do is ask your bf for another chance, find out how he feels (most important). See if it is possble to start again. If your really sorry and he really likes/ loves you, then you have a chance. Good luck and be brave, i know it's hard.
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I am sory to hear that you anorexic, did this start with the breakup or before that? I'm going through te pains of a breakup myself, and have lost my appetite. It's come to the point, that if i eat, my stomach gets a little upset. So i have to take it slowly. Normally now i don't feel hungry anymore, i just feel like i'm going through a routine, trying to get my old life back. My old appetite. Please try a number of small meals throughout the day. A little fruit, or snack to go kind of thing. Ven treat yourself with your favourite food. Te tuff you know you can't resist. You WILL feel better, don't worry. This will make you a stonger person. As for him telling you that he is unsure about his feelings, i was told the same. I try not to get angry about it, but focus on the good memories if i do think about him. But please don't think about the good memories and then say, i'm going to miss that, or i'll never have that again. That will just make it worse, and taint the good memories of the two of you. If you do want to think about it, think good thoughts and then force your mind to think about something else you have to do. Keep yourself busy, so that you don't allow the downtime for your mind to really think. If your anorexic problem gets worse, please consider going to a doctor, it will really help. You still have a wonderful life ahead of you, although it may not seem so now. Now go find something amazing to eat or drink, something you know you can't resist! But take it easy on your stomach, you know your body better than anyone else.