clodhopper

yeah i was wondering whats the best way to actually go about doing that to a guy, like if hes sleeping on his side or something but you want to wake him up by doing that? any advice? thanks!

i found fingering painful at first too, but once you do it more its much better. sex was very painful for me too, but that also goes away with time. dont worry!

for me --> i always used to just trim and have the landing strip. i recently started shaving completely and although its annoying to deal with razor burn and ingrown hairs, its so worth it!! i feel more clean and fresh at the time, and my guy LOVED it. never complained about the trimmed area, but ever since i started shaving completely... apparently its been a turn on for him --> not shaved completely, but definitely trimmed

My roommate was on tri-cyclen and told me that it totally diminished her sex drive. I'm on alesse, and I personally don't find a problem at all.

it's true, you'll just know. there's no other way to explain it, it just feels right and you know you're ready.

Agreed - if you enjoy fingering, you'll die for oral! It's amazing. I was a little apprehensive before I ever received it, but once I did... mmmm... hahaha and my guy was literally addicted to it. We talked about it once and he said he never did it if he didn't want to (and he did it ALL the time!) and that me being turned on made him turned on. Trust me, guys love it and I'm sure your guy knows what he's doing. Don't worry so much about your taste/smell and preparing for it... just go for it!

It's my fave position too, the easiest way for me to orgasm during sex. angelicshadow is right! it leaves the guy's hands free to touch you or whatever he wants to do. as for what to do with your hands, whatever you feel comfortable with. depends on the person!

I like when my guy talks dirty to me, it makes me feel really sexy and like he's so into what we're doing. I don't talk dirty a lot to him, but if I do it's like in a joking way and we just laugh and joke around, but it's still good. Mostly I am more of a noise maker...

That's so true. We all have to take chances with whatever matters to us, because we may not have the chance to take those risks tomorrow.

I also started a journal when I was going through my breakup... I didn't come up with quite as optimistic thoughts as you did, but I'm really glad you shared them. You've given me a better perspective on my situation, and hopefully I can be more optimistic from now on, thanks!!

i just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in this, and you can talk to me anytime you want. i could really relate to what you said: i start thinking about my ex boyfriend and i dont get sad so then i'm proud of myself... and then i kinda take a step back in the process. and i should know better too, but then i end up sitting there really missing the guy. and its not cuzz i want to fill the hole in my heart (cuz thats patched itself up somewhat, like you said, just in the process and after all this time). i really just wish i could spend time with him again cuz we used to have so much fun together. i dont want him again because i NEED him, i just want him back in my life...

I completely agree -- you really need to guard your heart in this case. He's already made it clear what is the most important thing to him and that you can't fulfill his needs, so I don't think he's worth your time. If you want to stay friends, then do so... just be careful, and don't trust him right off the bat. He needs to prove something to you.

Thank you so much for sharing your success story. I wish that more people would share optimistic bright things like this... it really helps. I can read this when I'm low and have hope in that one day I will feel the same. Thank you again.

is it hot if a girl kisses a guy after he's gone down on her?? the last poster said it would be hot in the guys opinion

Yeah I guess my thing is that I'm dealing with some other crap right now, so I'm just afraid of being this unhappy again and being trapped here for another year....

I know! I want them to be friends and we all know they are the closer ones out of all of us, so I don't see why they have to hide it! It's just sometimes a little hurtful when they're sneaky, cuz I feel really out of it and like I can't go talk to them... they're just really weird like that. This happened last term and I confronted the guy about it, and we worked it out and things were fine for a while. Now it's happening all over again and I'm just not sure what to do. I'm really scared about this year repeating itself and me being unhappy again next year living with them. I agree totally with what you said -- friendships shouldn't be hidden, they should be celebrated! That's what I don't get...

Hey I'm having a bit of a problem and need some advice PLEASE!! K here's my situation: I live with 2 roommates - one guy, one girl. The girl was my roommate in residence last year, and the guy is older than us but he also lived in our building. Anyway she and I were really close, and then I met him and he met my friends and it became kinda a group with his friends and my friends, it was great. So this year the 3 of us decided to live together. The first few months during the summer she was back home, so it was just him and I. Everything went well, we got along, we were close, it was great. This semester started and she came back to live with us. Things were great. They slowly became closer than they used to be, which was great. I wanted everyone to be really good friends. My problem NOW is that I feel like they sneak around behind my back to hang out without me. I don't even have a problem with them hanging out and me not being included!! It just hurts to have them sneak around. They like to have really long talks about personal stuff cuz they're good friends. They talk all the time and hang out in one of their rooms all the time. My problem with it comes at night. For example, tonight. I was in her room just a while ago talking and she asked what I was up to, then I asked her and she said she had to get up early tomorrow morning so she was heading to bed. So I left her room so she could sleep. I went into my room (which is right next to hers) but I left the door open cuz I wasn't going to bed yet. A couple minutes later, I hear her leave her room, close the door behind her, walk down the hall to our roommate's room, go in and close the door. This has happened several times before. So it's like if I pass her room, the light is off and the door is closed, so it seems as if she's sleeping. This happened last semester and I talked to the guy about it and he said I was right that it was sneaky and not the best thing and he apologized and stuff. But now it's happening all over again, and it's upsetting. Now some of you may be thinking that maybe they're doing more than hanging out lol... but just from knowing these 2 people I doubt it. I mean yeah it could happen, but if I go by his room I hear them deep in conversation, so I'm pretty sure it's just them hanging out and wanting to talk. Which is totally fine with me by the way, I just hate that they have to pretend they're doing something they're not. I KNOW that they are the closer roomies of all of us, and I've told them that... I just don't see why this is necessary. It's also upsetting because I'm supposed to be living with them next year, which I really want to cuz I don't have anyone else to live with right now and they really are my friends. Every other aspect of living with them is awesome, we all hang out, cook together, watch movies, talk, etc. We get along great, I just don't want to get stuck in another year of this pattern repeating itself. Can you guys PLEASE tell me what you think and give me some suggestions, like if I should confront them about it, who I should talk, etc. I'm just a mess and I need your help! Thanks!!!!!

I agree. There's no way you can just be friends right after a breakup, and for most people, you'll never be able to be just friends (because one person usually has feelings and the other doesn't)...

probably!!!! if he has any brain at all, haha good luck

i just wanted to say that i totally get where you're coming from. after everything i've been through, being devastated with my breakup, etc.. i still feel like i could just start over with my ex tomorrow and pick up where we left off and just be with him. its a really weird feeling, like when people wonder why you're like that cuz he was so mean and hurt you so much... but we cant help what we feel. we can push it away and ignore it, but its always there

It honestly sounds like you're doing well. Just getting the chance to hang out with her is great. I'm glad that you're able to do that and not bring up your relationship - you should be proud of yourself for being strong. I would suggest just keep doing what you're doing - as you said it seems like she's warming up to things and isn't so awkward. Good luck

My ex told me he needed to figure things out and didn't know what he wanted... I have tried to give him that space and time. It's been 4 months and we're not very close at all anymore, and awkward if we see each other. We said we would be friends but I don't know... a week ago he said he cared a lot about me and hadn't moved past what happened and hadn't given up... and that he still loves me. It's really hard because I don't know if he's really not ready for a relationship and is really just confused... or if it's just an excuse that will continue on forever. I just wanted to let you know that I understand where you're coming from, and I know how much it hurts because you feel he's the right one and you don't want to let him go. If you ever wanna talk, PM me

If she's cheated on you already, what's to say she won't just do it again? I know it's tough... but I agree with the previous posters - you should break up with her. And if she wants to be with you, she has some major proving to do in my opinion. But of course it's your call.

what do you mean?

I don't think you'll really know how you're gonna act (or how SHE will act) until you do see her in person. I was worried about a similar thing with my ex, who I saw for the first time after our breakup just last week. I thought I might not be able to resist touching him or showing him my true feelings, but when the time actually came around... I had to act like a friend, it was the only thing that could happen right now. Of course it depends on the situation, but I think if you really believe you can be friends with her, then you should let her come visit and try to hang out. However if you think a fake friendship is all that will happen, then maybe it's not the best thing. I'd give it a chance though, you never know. You don't know how she feels either. Good luck!