deviousj420

im 23 - hes gona be 26 end of july i kno weve been thru so much but i hope we could wash away the past hurts n start anew but thats impossible i said i wasnt going to get my hopes up - n i kno there is no way we could even be 2gether again - i just needed to talk to him, to kno hes stills there... somewere... i will always love him but i kno its best for both of us to lead separate lives, because we cannot agree on a life together ill always love him - n yes he did hit me but i provoked it because i said stuff i shouldnt have that made him mad - hes never hit any of his gfriends b4 - i just drove him crazy n he had no other way to shut me up since he had told me to leave n i wouldnt its my fault this relationship didnt last....

we havent talked since sunday when we got in2 a really bad fight - a physical one and he said he didnt want to be with me i called him at work today(wednesday) - i asked him a big favor, if he could go with me to drop my car off at the dealership thursday nyte so it can get checked out on fri morning... i wanted to kno if i could use his truck the next day for work n he could drive his car - he asked why dont i ask sum1 else n i said no i dont have no one else to ask i want you to do this for me n he sid why n i said why do u think n he said i duno, n throughout most of the convo he was quite n he has been quite b4 after we fought n he was going to forgive me - imnot gietting my hopes up cuz this myte actaully make it easier for me to move on since i kno at least he still loves/cares about me - just we arent compatable - anyways he said hed have to think about it n i told him to call me when he had an answer n he said when do u need one n i said now n he said well i cant give it 2 you now so i said then call me after work n he said ok then we hung up n now im hapi that we can talk again cuz ive been wonderin how hes been feelin/ doin/ thinkin etc... but im so xcited n ahpi n im not gettin my hopes up but i love him so much and i duno i shouldnt of aske dhim huh - there are otehr people i could of asked who would have said yes but i used this as an excuse to talk to him.....

this myte be a lil long but please read n advice sunday we broke up saturday i agreed to leave my best friends reception @ 9 - it was over at 10 - because he didnt trust me to be ther n he didnt go (he wasnt invited, my friend n him dont get along because of the way he treats me) he then wanted to go out fora drive but without me n of course i said no because he made me leave early - granted i was goin to bed but i wasa bridesmaid in the wedding n tired as anything anyways.... sunday we agreed to spend the day together - his friend stopped over n he then asked me if he could go ridin for and hour - which woulda turned out longer then just an hour - i said no cuz he agreed to spend the day with me n it always seems hes ok bein with me until sumthin better comes up - so we got in2 an argument then he was in the garage talkin to his friend n they were talkin shtuff about me - so i went in there n cleared up what mario was sayin - then i mentioned how he shouldnt be ridin anywas since he dont havea license - he got mad n his friend left to 7-11 - we were in the house arguin n lately hes been shovin me but he says its because i make him crazy - well then he punched me in my mouth - he had asked me to leave n told me he didnt want to be with me anymore but i didnt want that to be - he made my lip bleed then i left - i had to come back cuz i 4got my fone - then i mentioned in front of his friend that he hit me n his friend left n mario went in the house there he told me he was serious cuz of the bullshoot i pulled(tellin his friend he didnt havea licnese and how he hit me) n he said that was the end - it was over , i left n have since had no contact i was ok sunday for the most part then yesterday was kewl but now today i find myself thinking about him n maybe hes sorry n hell change his mind n maybe i shold just wait a few more days till he calls me or sumthin, or is he waitin for me to call him i kno are relantionship has been rocky from the start (1 1/2 yrs ago) but i dont want it to end because i kno if we try hard n with a lil more effort on his part we could be fine but i dont think/feel he wants to make that effort - i have this other boy who is madly in love with me despite all the shtuff i put him thru n he still stands by me and wants to be with n inside i kinda feel like hes my soulmate but i want mario i have to stay strong please - if anyone has break up advice, poems, songs to listen to - to help me get over him n move on - or how to get him back i duno im sad - i love him help...

my last post was "were breaking up june 4th" I thank every1 for the advice and support, but i cant not talk to him, unless im with people and occupied i cant do this, i love him so much n i kno i have to but it hurts so bad... ive been listenin to madonnas "power of goodbye" over n over n over again, its inspirational but then my heart takes over my head n i cry n want him to hold me and make it all better.... i tired, im trying, really i am so hard but its hard we were 2gether 1.5yrs and i kno i loved him more than he loved me because he agreed with me about it since i lied to him b4 and he says all i bring is doubt to the relationship but i adore him n he sees h ow i treat him its just ive messed up n yea i admit it but i want us to work so badly but i kno it wont n this time has to be the real goodbye but its so hard.... its so hard .... i need support, advice - sumthing! -im goin crazy...

love is respect, it is putting the other person first, showing you care, love is honesty love is knowing whole heartedly when its really love, love is tenderness, love is warm love is everything that isnt there.....

thank you all sooo much for your advice and i kno, i shouldnt be with him because of how he treats me but i feel like i deserve it because i lied.... i deserve it.....

because of how he treats me, and one time we went to the bar but i had him on speaker fone when i was leavin n he called us white trash because we were drinking....

him coming is out of the option... he doesnt want to go and my friend doesnt want him there..... she doesnt like him because of how he treats me... id love for him to come, but its not possible

my best friend of 12-13 yrs is getting married june 4th... im in her wedding ive been dating my boyfriend for 1.5yrs - my friend and him do not get along... he doesnt trust me because i have lied to him in the past this was last summer.... we have had sum falling outs since then but nuthin too major he doesnt trust me at the reception because there will be other guys n he doesnt want me dancin with or talkin to any.... he says june 4th we are breakin up because he cant trust me and he doesnt wanna deal with the *beep*. if i dont go to the reception but if i dont go to the reception he says we wont break up im so torn, i love my bf to death but i cant *beep* over my friend like that.... what the hell do i do? ive been doin nuthin but cryin n my friend is always there for me even tho weve fought b4 but he is so iffy and i dun oif hell always be there n i dont wanna break up because i dont wanna be all alone n i need to be loveds but he hasnt even been affectionate towards me n he sayd its all my fault cuz ima liar and i duno what to d ](*,) o im so sad n im ramblin but im cryin n i need advice..... im to ashamed to talk to anyone i kno about this... its embarrasing... why doesnt he love me? it wasnt that big a deal, i only went out drinking and i never cheated.. why wont he just love me? i treat him like gold... n he acknowledges that but.... i duno....some advice?

](*,) he doesnt always answer the phone because sometimes he just doesnt want to talk to whoever it is.... but hell tell me who calls like, i havent been wantin to go over his house this past week to sleep there so instead he has came to mine.... i couldnt fathom him cheating n not because im blinded by love but because i know as well as everyone else that hes very honest n he is not that kinda guy.. tho the thought does still creep up... ugh i duno, but thank you for takin the time to voice your opinion.... but i really hope ur wrong [-o

girl i feel sorry for you... to me it sounds like its over but things said during drunkenness cannot fully be believed because people will talk rubbish just to have somthing to say to make them seem big... when in fact if they have to do that then they are really just small... it seems my boyfriend is doing the same thing almost, i dont suspect him of cheating but i feel like he doesnt want to be with me anymore but doesnt have the heart to break up with me so hes distant and mean hoping ill leave him ..... it hurt sso much and its so confusing i kno... advice is easier said then done but id leave him and let him be.... you guys really shouldnty drink anyways, it makes it worse when fighting.... bes tof luck to you sorry

it seems me and my boyfriend are going thru the same thing... it sux i kno! has anything major happened recently? money problems, family, friends? anything that could be stressing him out? have yous been fighting alot? do u "b*tch" like i do? (lol, ud haveta read my post to uinderstand) how old are you guys? maybe he has second thought abous settling down....? i hope i could help... tho, i dont think i was very helpful do u try ur best to be appreciative of him and he doesnt show any gratitude in return? my bf is that way... and it hurts so bad... im sorry.... let me kno how stuff evolves

recently my BF of 1 1/2 yrs has been seeming distant towards me. he claims hes under stress from putting his bike (street bike) back 2gether that he had crashed last summer... (its costing him more then he thought, its takin longer then he planned) he seems like he doesnt care to be around me as much anymore... has an attitude towards me which he claims is becuase of his stress.... his cell phnone has been ringin alot more lately.. he answer sumtimes others not, but hell tell me who it is... he says hes not cheating on me because he doesnt have time... hes to worried about his bike to be worried about someone else.... he only tells me he loves me if i say it first and hes only affectiionate when im distant for a while, then he finally notices.... i kind of want to break up but i love him and it would just hurt both of us... i try to talk to him, ask him if i can help, whats wrong, etc. but he says its just his bike... i dont understand... how can this "bike" be taking up all his time, his energy, how can it make him so angry like hes been? i realize its costing alot but still, i just cant believe that his bike is the center of all thats been different lately.... he also mentions that i complain to much.. when really, ill admit when i complain, but half the time its me just stating my opinion or how i feel about something... he says i just shouldnt say anything at all then.... im sad, confused, hurt, angry.... any advice? comments or questions? please help.

hindsight is 20/20 my vision is like nearly blind i always do the wrong thing, make the wrong choices, move to fast and mess things up, with work, family, relationships, anything... desicions are my weakness, i make bad ones - i make them to hasitly to fast, without thinkin thru the conseqences - ive made horrible mistakes it makes me so ssad, mad, aggervated - i dont kno how to feel why do i mess stuff up? is it a habit thats so grown i cant break? i come up with so many reasons for being wrong that i lose sight of the fact that no matter how i put it, im still wrong.

you cant help her control HER emotions, she needs to do that on her own. What you can help her do is realize that you are not there to hurt her, you can be there whenever, foever, whyever if she lets you. (ask yourself first if that is sumthin you can be sure to do) im not sure why she is so confused? this guy lives over seas, so she shes him, if you can trust nuthin will happen then continue the relationship, otherwise why even bother to get into it if you no shes gonna be goin there and see this guy and you wont be able to trust her.... does she satisfy your needs? does she make you smile? do you satisfy her needs? do u make her smile? do you both enjoy each others company? be best friends, spend time together, if sumthin happens, go with it.... dont question all the stuff thats happening, just go with it.... how does it feel for you? do u kno how shes feeling? just ask her straight up.... being blunt may be scary for you, fearing rejection is normal.... but not knowing? that hurts even more.... let me know, any questions ask... back off also, see what she does i kinda left this other guy hangin cuz i didnt want to hurt his feelings.... i been ignorin him, so see what she does if you do the same, not ignore her but wait for her to call you, for her to make the moves on you... keep me posted

forgiveness is very powerfull. forgetting just makes you weak. if some has been cheated on then the cheater needs to exert every effort to be trusted again. it wont be easy and could take weeks, months, hell... even years... but if its really wirth it, if thats something you believe to be truly worth it then go for it... walking away is hard, if this is no the first time, then run away! but i believe in second chances mainly because ive needed them) but first find out whwy the person cheated, why they lied , what were thier motives...? if there truly is love there than embrace it and accept it and acknowledge that its not easy but it CAN work. if you fel as tho its not worth then thats ur opinion but im just giving you mine. you can fogive, it will not be easy, it will take a long time. and thoses memories will always haunt you.... but forgivness is the greater power.

shes confused between the two of you, i was once in this same situation.. and kinda still am anyways, she rather likes you or she dont. how often does she see this guy? when will she see him aagin? your both young.... you have your whole lives ahead of you.. what you need to understand is that there is no garuntee that the 2 of you will be together forever, this is ontemporarily, this is only right know.. understand that, go with that...know just that this is going to be one experiance youll have in your life... let it be fun and enjoy it while it lasts

you are both young and not in a marriage so hangin out with friends is fine. going to the bars or clubs occasionally is also fine. however if he starts ditching you to this all the time then there are problems. let him know how you feel about this in a calm matter and xplain things to him, if he cares hell understand and may not want to all the time, maybe him and his friends can go to a resturaunt were you can also go and eat as they drink....(maybe even sneak a drink urself-lol) anyways, point of the matter is you are both free to do what you want... just do it out of respect to each other... has he ever given you reason to doubt him? if hes goin to the bar/club all the time then ur not losing much because by doing that hell never amount to much.... i would like to go out with my guy friends to the bar and even my girlfriends to.. my boyfriend gets mad just because he thinks im gonna flirst and talk to every guy there. SO NOT TRUE! i just go out to hang out with my friends, not meet anyone... and just get my drink on! however if he did that i would feel upset, but ten again we are both over 21 and we always invite each other out when we go.. i duno this isa toughie, hes 21 and gonna wanna go, youll have to let him abnd be accpeting of him doing this occasionally... or let him go if you cant handle it. no sense in puttin either one of you in a situation you know you cant handle...

you both are very young and being in a relationship for 5 yrs? since she was 15? you both need yout time to explore the world and the people in it. she is keeping you around just for her on piece of mind, knowing that if nothing else works out, youll be there for her. you need to move on. let go. start a life of your own and know that this is just one experience that you will have in life. there will be many others. and many other girls who do not treat you this way, ones who really love you, who truly appreicaite you , who actually respect you. dont let this one girl ruin ur world, let her be free, let her do her own thing... and you do yours... and you will get over her and find happiness withint yourself, wether its alone or with sum1 else for now.... youll be ok

You are in an abusive relationship. she needs therapy to get over why she has these feelings that are makin her act out in this way. you need counsling to understand that it is not your fault and that you need to get away. this is not a healthy atmosphere for you or the children to be in. ask her what is wrong, whats bothering her... tell her how this makes you feel... CALMY - DO NOT ACCUSE! suggest you both go to counsling, if she doesnt agree go without her. If the abuse continues by all means DO NOT HESITATE to call the police... write a report - this needs to be done if you do decide to separate and she tries to kee p you from your children. please let me know whats happens but something needs to be done, you are not her servant and she needs to respect you. Get out if she does not make even a slighest effort to change her actions. stand your ground. this is not love, this is not a relationship.... and staying together for the children, thats ridiculous because do you really think your chiuldren want to see there parents behave this way? keep me posted...

Ask yourself the following... how has this made you feel? do you enjoy feeling this way? why do you let yourself feel this way? how can you stop from feeling this way? why wont you do that then? make a list of the pro and cons, what weighs more? you didnt mention how old you two were, i suspect he may have commitment fears if your older then 27... perhaps if you are young he is afraid of "missing out" and secretly checking out what he might be missing... either way: confront him. calmly, rationally, easily. do not attack, dont accuse - this will just make him feel defensive. instead ask him questions like; how have you been feeling about us lately? where do you see our relationship going? are you sure your ready to fully commit? would you liek time to yourself? ask him questions that make him open up, get to know he he feels first, then confront him. say you came accross some things that made you uncomfortable and would just like some answers of reassurance. DO NOT ACCUSE! tell him how this has made you feel and ask why he never mentioned any of it to you..... if he says its cuz you woulda goteen mad, well then ask him would he rather you be mnad or upset? because this surely has upsetten you! get back to me with whats happens... i would really like to know

sorry to hear this... ive had similar problems with my guy, ive been the B****H as you put it.... anyways h0w old are you two? what was so great about the relationship? what didnt work so great? are you better off without her? without the horrible things you went through? (if any) did you do anything to cause this? if not then its her loss and you know this, because you are the great one... she is not. she let go of something good. something youll alway have, Yourself! so let her go, let her do what she wants, you worry about you and havea good time doin so.... After all, your the one with the good thing! buuuuuuuuuuut if you screw her over, then you got what you deserved. karma, my friend. its what makes the world go round

I love him and want him. He feels that for me but i cant believe it, i doubt it. is it cuz i feel unworthy of his affection? or maybe because i havent been completely honest with him? and i was torn between him and someone else and lead them both on.... maybe thats why i have these feelings of doubt regarding our relationship...? my EX best friend wanted my current boyfriend, i got him tho... she tried 2xs to break us up, the first i forgave her, now things will never be the same...the things he said she said to him such as you never really liked her right? and just her trying to get him to dislike me.... that hurts so bad tho i asked for it becasuse i was hiding stuff from him.... anyways, i feel like hes sneaking around with her... one because i dont trust her, tho i try my hardest to trust him, he has never given me reason not... but i feel like because of my lies and deception hes doing it to get back at me. or heis going to do it. im sad, im upset,m i want to cry. sometimes we are som in love, then others its like whats goin on here? im confused, i just want advice, opinions, or sumthing... sumthin to give me insight, hope, understanding...... words of wisdom... something... i know i caused this on myself..... i brought my own self doubt because i wasnt honest with him... but how do i get over it? how do i let these insecurities go? why do i feel as tho sometimes im perfect for him, then others i feel as tho i dont deserve him or he dont want me..... i have hurt this great man and brought him to tears more than once.... that hurts me soo much.. how do i move on?

what did i do? i met this guy, jon, two weeks we hung out, he went back to the military tho we stayed in touch the whole yr n we both agreed it felt as tho we were meant to be with each other. in the meantime of him being gone i got involved with mario, and jon was ok with it. i thought it would be simple to leavemario and just have everything be ok with jon. jon camer home and i found myself in love with mario. allthough im not sure if me and mario "are meant to be" since those feelings arent there as they were with me and jon. both guys want me. i care for them both. im currently with mario and have told jon thats how its gonna be. i know hes upset. im upset. i dont want mario to be upset. but i dont no what to do. i love mario, or so i think and allthough those feelings with jon are not as strong as the were before, i think its only a matter of time before i find them again with him. jon smokes and allthough i don tlike it i could deal, mario doesnt like me drinking so i dont drink as much tho i wish i could. i like them both. i almost think i love them both. im just scared to leave what i know to venture into the unknown....

my boyfriend of 1 year admitted to me that he got off the other night using my MAXIM magazine i had left over there. he always tells me how sexy i am and how he gets so turned on by me but i cant get over the fact that he needed outside stimulation to satisfy his sexual needs. i was sick and sleepy that night and he said he was gonna shower then play video games b4 he came over. well thats when he decided to get off im guessin cuz he knew he wasnt gonna get any. this hurts my feelings so much. i feel like i cant be comfortable around him anymore, that i need to be his sex slave or sumthin so it never happens again. he says itsa guy thing and thats what guys do sometime just cuz its fun. i suppose but i duno, i feel hurt he couldnt just close his eyes n imagine rather than havin to look at other chics to get turned on. and plus lil boys and big fat ugly guys who dont get none do this stuff right?! not someone who has someone n swears there so hot. i need advice, information, something. girls, has this ever happened to you? how did you deal, what did you do? guys, is this sumthin that every guy does even when they allready have a chic? i feel so hurt, betrayed, inadequate, un sexy. i dont know what to do. hes apologized over and over again but still.... i just dont feel as tho im good enuf for him now. also, i want to get implants in january and he is totally against this. but isnt that wat all the chics in the magazines have?!