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nuts

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  1. nuts
    hello everyone i was wondering if anyone here is bipolar and/or knows the symptoms? because i have been pretty messed up for a while, but im only now ready to come to terms with it and deal with it head on. i went to my doctor about 6 months ago and he was pretty dismissive of me, partly my fault though as i did not give him the whole story. ive been looking for a long time at my "symptoms" and im convinced it is manic depression. obviously im no doctor! but i would like to know how anyone else out there handled it, or any other problem similar to this. would love to hear anything and everything, hearing other people handling there problems always makes others feel less alone, me included. thanks to anyone who replies, much appreciated
  2. nuts
    well i hate to sound dramatic but my secret is pretty life changing! i don't know, maybe its best if i don't tell this person. but the reason i didn't want to post it here is because 1. it won't affect any of you (!) and 2. i think i need a more personal chat about it. it's more of a confession than a secret anyway. it may sound silly, but does anyone know that website where you send a postcard with a confession on it and they show it on the site? even that would be a help!
  3. nuts
    my best friend has gone away and won't be back for some time. normally we would tell each other about things in our lives that are important as soon as we can but contact is limited and what i have to say cannot be done over the phone. its a really big deal for me and i need to confide in someone but i don't know who to turn to! i live with someone who is a good friend of mine and would be the next logical choice to go to, but im not sure if they are trustworthy of my secret. i feel like i'm going to burst if i don't telll soon! should i confide in this friend or just keep it to myself? much appreciated if anyone could advise.
  4. nuts
    hi, thank you for replying. well my family aren't exactly hostile towards the gay community. my mother has some gay friends but for her son to be gay or bisexual is a whole other matter altogether. i don't theink any of them would take to it particularly well.
  5. nuts
    i haven't been on this website in such a long time. last time i was on i was coming to terms with the fact that i was bisexual, i guess i was coming out to myself. since then i have become more accepting of my sexual preferences but still have not found the courage to tell anyone yet. i believe that one of the reasons is that so far i am bisexual in theory, not in practice, and so i feel the need to dip my toe in the water (so to speak) just to be sure of myself. so i joined an internet website to look for other like-minded guys and ended up meeting someone. it seems as though we share a lot of the same views and opinions on our sexuality as well as other things. i've grown to like him a lot in quite a short time and i am quite sure that although i can tell he likes me back, it may not be on the same level. i really want to meet him in person but im scared to as i am not ready to come out yet. i haven't been completely honest with him about that part of my life yet but i would like to be. basically i'm not sure if i should meet him or not. if i tell him the truth and he isn't interested i'll be crushed. silly i know, but i can't help that. and if he does agree to meet i'm worried about other people finding out. can anyone please offer any advice on what the hell to do?!
  6. nuts
    i could really use some support from anyone else who has been thru what i am going through right now. i have been very depressed for years and have never done anything about it. i finally told my parents how i feel today. my dad (who doesnt live at home) kind of thought it was just dumb issue i needed to get over. he doesnt understand. my mum hasnt talked to me about it yet. im really worried to tell her. she has problems of her own, i dont want to burden her with the fact that she has a messed up son. its harder because i live away from home so contact is either by email or phone, with both of them. its really difficult to explain to them what im going through. im in tears right now just writing it all down. i dont want to let them down or make them feel bad, but i cant keep this to myself any longer. its been like this for 5 years and its killing me inside. the worst part is that i just moved out and met a bunch of new friends. but i keep pushing them all out. im making things more difficult for myself then they have to be. i wont let myself be happy and i dont even know why. i guess i needed to get this all out. im really scared to think that im finally confronting this to my parents. i dont want them to have to worry about me but at the same i cant do this alone. id appreciate so much if anyone could share what theyve been thru, how theyve handled it. i will take everything to heart.
  7. nuts
    yup, know exactly what you mean. the smallest things can trigger a whole downward spiral from which its hard to pick yourself back up from. i could give advice, but it'd be hypocritical of me as i cant follow through with any of it myself. what i can offer though is that you dont just hope it will go away. ive been waiting years for this to end and its not. nothing can ever change if you dont take action towards it. if you feel like going to a doctor then do it. at least that way he can tell you if anything needs to be done. can i ask how old you are?
  8. nuts
    well the good news is that i havent seen him for a couple days as he's been away. i havent thought of him a whole lot either, not until he's brought up or mentioned in conversation anyway. but when he is the topic, those little (okay, big) feelings of envy kick in again. its definitely not infatuation (not yet anyway...) as i realised the jealousy is a lot stronger than the crush feelings. ugh i dont know what to do. i know that when he gets back i'll like him again. ive even seen some of his faults already, which i ended up liking, believe it or not. i guess i'll just have to wait and see what happens. i dont want to stop liking him as a friend but i cant carry on liking him more than that. agh!
  9. nuts
    im sure many a gay man would have you done for slander with a comment like that! i dont agree whatsoever. i think that attraction can come from many different things: physical, emotional, whatever. for that reason some people might be able to bounce from one sex to another without thinking anything of it. on the other hand, some think the idea of one sex is mortifying. its all just individual preference. maybe the guy in question really is done with guys because after trying it out, it just wasnt his thing. whatever the real answer is, as his friend, if you respect him and his lifestyle, let him go with it. he'll figure himself out in time.
  10. nuts
    i've been there as well, still am really. sometimes it can take a long time to meet the friends that are right for you. i have been through so many different people that either had been friends or i hoped they would be friends. but the few that i have held on to have been the ones that will be there for life. dont give up on other people. it can seem so easy at times but ultimately its not what you want. try and stay positive. you get what you give so if you go out there with a positive, confident outlook, you might see things differently. hope things can be different for you.
  11. nuts
    hi guys im in a real bad position right now. i just moved in with a whole bunch of new people at university. i really like most of them and we all get on really well. the problem is, i think i might like one of the guys a little too much... after knowing him a short while i think he's a really cool guy. he's very good looking, good dresser, good build, etc. and i think im getting a crush that i really dont want! if for no other reason, i cant like him like that because he's straight. not to mention, he doesn't know im not... anyway i just want to be friends with this guy, i have to stop liking so much him asap. when he's hanging around other guys and not me it kind of upsets me, i cant let that carry on. any suggestions? i think im also jealous of him. that's very odd. i really like a lot of thigs about him but i think a lot of it has to do with me being envious of his characteristics, looks, dress sense, all that stuff. yet that just makes me like him more. help please! i would be so much appreciated.
  12. nuts
    very true. and another reason why i have never brought myself to do it.
  13. nuts
    id rather not think about it personally...
  14. nuts
    and one more thing..... hahaha i like the topic title.
  15. nuts
    but heres what i dont get. i am one of those bi's who tend to be more physically attracted to guys and emotionally attracted to girls - but thats certainly not always the case. many a time has the sight of a woman turned me on. equally speaking, i have fallen in "deep like" (no way am i gonna call it love) with a guy simply because of who he was inside. that in itself allowed me to become physically attracted to him as well. so with all that said and done, does this mean that i should choose one or the other? i cant control my feelings for anyone, be it sexual or emotional. who knows if in the future i'll go all-gay or all-straight. whatever does happen, i refuse to label myself right now as one way or the other. im still young, still finding things out for myself. "bisexual" so happens to be the easiest term to describe what i am and how i feel. i may not like using it (i HATE labels) but for now its the easiest thing. as for those gays who "hide" behind bisexuality... i agree that its an easier way to ease yourself into homosexuality. if it makes them happy then so be it.
  16. nuts
    im kind of embarrassed to admit it. no, i didnt tell her. i really wish i could have. and i got so close... but i just couldnt bring myself to do it. i dont know why i do this to myself. i know she would be fine with it (given time) and that i would feel a hell of a lot better. the sucky thing is that i am starting university now and could have a major life adjustment by being honest with others about my sexuality. it hasnt come up yet. i wonder what i'll say when it does? i guess on the plus side i at least came clean with her about a few things. i told her about my depression and why i never talked to her about it before. she knows theres more to it than what i admitted but we had to say our goodbyes so i could leave and i didnt want to hinder it by some life-changing discussion about me and my issues. i guess you could say i opened the gateway for our *next* big talk eh. baby steps. ...said the 20 year old man...
  17. nuts

    Gifts!!!

    nuts replied to nikkers04's topic in Dating Advice

    please PLEASE dont go down the cologne route! its so played out and unoriginal. if you want to do somethin special, make him something. okay so it doesnt smell nice, but at least this way it wouldve come from the heart. those are the things that you remember.
  18. nuts
    funnily enough, it was the boys changing rooms in school that made me realise that im not straight. in my opinion, if there is an attraction in the changing rooms you cant deny it. it doenst make you a big dirty perv, it just means you like what you see! but i think a certain decency is expected though. male and female changing rooms are separate for a reason. people like to expose themselves in the comfort of knowing they wont be started at in a sexual way. as times have changed and homosexuality has become more open, clearly its not the same as when men only had to avoid females, and vica versa. so for the sake of all the straight guys out there, its not fair to gawk ot take advantage of the situation, just out of respect for others. but having said that i dont think ive ever been in a changing room and not taken a sneaky peek... lol
  19. nuts
    i believe that if you go into anything with preconceived notions, it takes a hell of a lot to change your opinion. this website proved very interesting. have a read with an open mind. link removed opinions would be appreciated.
  20. nuts
    you cant let yourself think this way. it is so much easier to feel like crap than to pick yourself up again and get on with life. i know, this is easier said than done. hell ive lived like it for the past 5 years and still find it difficult to do so most of the time. but youve got to remember that youve been through this kind of thing before. you got through it before, you can get through it again. unfortuanately for some of us, these things happen. we're not always the one being told that their the object of someone else's affections, or even the one being checked out. but we have to remember its not because we're not worth it. feeling like this can only make a bad situation worse. sometimes thats what you want, but when it comes down to it you know its not. and remember, how long did it take you to be honest with your friend about how you felt? others feel the same. for all you know, theres a whole bunch of guys, girls or whatevers in between stealing glances at you when youre not looking. you had the courage to confront your feelings, not all people can do that. im sorry to be so unforgivably cliche, but remember: "it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all". and not to mention, knowing someone feels that way about you is (i imagine) an amazing feeling to experience, be it from someone you feel mutual about or a relative stranger. your friend loves you no matter what has happened. i would guess he is more in shock now than anything else. you cant just throw away feelings like the ones you two shared. dont ever blame yourself for loving someone. imagine a life where you couldnt love. im sure its not something you would wish for.
  21. nuts
    im so sorry to hear what happened. i know that anything i could say right now wont change anything for you. so just know that if you ever need to talk it out, there's people here who want to listen and help in any way thay can. myself included. if he thinks that emotions are easily controlled than he is deluded. from what i gather, he of all people should get that its not that simple. depression is just one from a long list of emotions that can be overwhelming. there are some things that you just cannot change. your sexuality is one of those things. it is a part of who you are and you should never, ever change that for anyone. if this guy is the friend you claim he is, he should be able to understand you. admittedly, it can be very daunting knowing someone feels a certain way if you dont feel the same way back. you did the right thing by letting him know. it wouldve eaten you up inside never telling him the truth about yourself. if this has cost you your friendship than perhaps it is for the best. as difficult as this may be to hear, maybe it would be easier for you both in the long run. the people you keep closest to you need to be the ones who accept you and love you for who you are, not everything but the part of yourself you feel forced to hide. i hope that what happened can be fixed. the relationship you two share is a special one, dont give up on it. give each other some space for a while if you can. when you feel able, talk to him about it, see if things cant be made better. try and see things from his point of view, then make sure he can see yours as well. i really hope that things can be reconciled. pm me if you need to talk it over, id be happy to lend an ear. take care. x
  22. nuts
    im heading off to university in a few days and am really looking forward to it. however im worried that im just setting myself up for dissappointment again. you see ive been depressed over the last few years but have never done anything about it or told anyone really. i keep holding on to the fact that something new in my life is happening which will fix all the problems. i thought leaving school would do this, it didnt. then i travelled the world over the last year yet the problems were still there. now im hoping for a fresh start at university, hoping that the causes for my depression will be removed. i recently told my best friend about how i felt and she was so surprised. but speaking objectively, she said that i thought the problems would dissappear with each fresh start and they never did, so why should it be any different this time? on one level i agree with her and it scares me, but on another i really am wiping the slate clean so why shouldnt everything change for me? i guess im here because id really like some advice, or maybe just an opinion. i want to believe that as of next week everything can change for me, but am i just deluding myself?
  23. nuts
    hate to stray from the topic, but can you elaborate?
  24. nuts
    i lost contact with a lot of people from school. i guess it just happens as you grow up and sometimes you grow apart or just drift from each other. i lost a really best friend in the process which is a shame but sometimes it just happens. you later realise that some people are "situational friends" and once you leave that situation, you leave them as well. a few of those friends i did hold on to however. i found the ones that mean the most to you tend to stick around longer! if you and your friend are reallu that close and mean a lot to each other, separation shouldnt end the friendship. it might make it a little more difficult for you both but i wouldnt give up on it just yet!
  25. nuts
    thats hilarious! note to self: drive around town in ski masks and ask for directions to nearest bank...
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