Iceman26

I think saying thank you was fine, he gave you some info and you said thank you, not a big deal. You were being courteous in spite of what happened, and thats cool of you.

I agree with Muneca, thats a pretty safe way to do it while getting your point accross.

Man I hate it when you say I love you to someone and they dont say anything back. Thats the worst! Yeah let her call you, and dont say I love you to her. Shes the one putting you through all this, let her say it first.

Dont contact her. She dumped you and said she needed time. Let her come back to you. I am sorry this happened, but things will get better.

Yeah, thats a good thing for them to say. I would respond to that comment by saying "Are you going to introduce me to them or what?"

Ask her out again, you have nothing to lose.

Hes just a horny kid. A squirrel looking for a nut. He may or may not be your friend, you'll find out when you turn him down for sex.

Man, this is one of the stickiest situations I have seen in a while, I am feeling challenged here. Ok, here is what we have established: - Your girlfriend wants to go out with her single, flirty friends, and doesnt want you there. Either she is flirting with other men or just doesnt want to be around you. - She ditches you and breaks plans with you to go out with these friends, and yet you sit there waiting for her to be done with her friends so you can spend some time with her. If a girl did that to me, I would cancel the plans entirely and ask her to call me when she takes spending time with me seriously. My time is valuable and I am sure yours is too. - Sorry, but the "good old times" ended when your girl decided to get in a relationship. I have no sympathy there, if you want to act single, then be single. - Basically, any objection you voice is going to be labeled as "controlling" or "possessive", because you object to doing what she wants to do and when she says things like that, it turns the situation back around on you. So, in the end, she will do what she wants to do, and you sit there and tolerate it. - As far as going to the same club she goes to, its called "Free Will". If you want to go to the club she is at, you can. I wouldn't suggest going though, if she says she doesn't want you around, going to the club and her seeing you wouldn't be good. I dont know why you accepted her change in plans. I get the feeling you are going to keep tolerating this kind of behavior and aren't really going to do anything about it. Like I said earlier, you have a couple of options. 1) You can either keep tolerating this and let her do what she wants to do, and keep sitting there waiting for her while she goes out and you will always be left second guessing and wondering. 2) Dump her and move on to someone who doesnt play games and is straightforward and honest with you. 3) Go out and have a good time with your buddy. Dont meet up with her after she goes to the club. Turn it around on her. Tell her your friend needs you. Do the same thing to her that she does to you and see how she feels. If she really is into you, she will chase you. If she doesn't care, well, then you have your answer. Look at the facts and look at what you know. She'd rather hang out with her friends then you buddy, and she is doing what she wants to do with little consideration for your feelings. You need to get busy doing something else and not be as easily accessible to her, and perhaps then she will appreciate you more and stop taking you for granted.

Well what she says and what shes doing are 2 different things. Dresses sexy for herself? Then why doesnt she do it at home or for you! I think women do that because they like the reassurance from other men that they are attractive and desired. It feeds their ego. I dont seriously date girls that go to clubs or bars anyways, less of a headache. Well, as for whats wrong with her, I think it sounds like she tries to please everybody, but it sounds like she is more concerned with pleasing her friends more than anyone else. She lies, doesnt tell you what she really means, and it sounds like you do everything according to her schedule. So she "needs" to branch of with her friends. I'm sorry, but doesnt she work with them everyday? So its ok for her to ditch the plans you had of staying together to go hang out with her friends? You should have said no its not ok, we had plans and now you are breaking them. Speak up! Sorry bro, but her priorites seem to be her friends, not you. Do you want to be #1 or #2 man? Are you happy being a convenience? I am very much a fan of a girl having her own life, interests, and friends, but not at my expense, and not when I have plans with her. As for changing your behavior, why care if she questions it or not? You need to do and say things that are going to make you happy.

Your welcome, I just hate to see people get taken for granted. Well I am sorry it didnt work out well man, but to be honest its difficult to meet people on the internet. Nevermind her making her mind up. You make your mind up that you are or are not going to be treated in this manner. Well whenever I get over a situation, I go out and get boozed up with my buddies and, when I am ready, meet some new ladies. That may not be the best way to get over something, but it doesnt have to be, because its my way. Good luck man.

Hey thats a good idea, sell the ticket to the other dude. I would cut off all communications, she sounds like she enjoys playing god with other peoples emotions over the internet, you havent met this girl in person anyways, so its not like its a tremendous loss. If its any comfort: For all you know, she might be some overweight ugly wildebeast or a man for gods sake. You just dont know these days.

I think you know whats going on, why you feel the need to see much more than you already have is beyond me. She is playing more games with you than she is playing on the internet. I would tell her goodbye, hope her and the guy become internet gaming legends and much success to their "guild" in slaughtering goblins or conquering the next planet, and move on.

I think the counseling would be a fine idea. Thank you, I have been living in relationship hell since I was 14, so I know a little something about them. Of course you can still talk to us, thats what we are here for. Good luck!

Well dude, you will never get what you want by sitting there and waiting for it to come to you. Shes 17, and she is probably pretty shy herself. You need to ask yourself, how could she like you if she doesn't really know you? Why not ask her AND her friend to join you for lunch? That will take the pressure off of you asking just her, and she will feel more comfortable because her friend is there. You will feel less pressure because its not a date situation. I am just throwing ideas out at you man, you need to start somewhere, and it might as well be now. Asking her friends is immature and the easy way, not to mention makes you look insecure by asking her friends instead of her. What you can mention to her friend is that you think she is cute. That might help, if you can catch the friend alone that is.

He gave up, not you. I dont know what else to tell you, if you like being this unhappy and not getting any in the sack, than stick with it. I would have bailed long ago. I think if you love someone you would do your best to make that person happy, and your hubby isnt even making an effort at it. You said yourself you cant talk to him, because he gets angry, so what other options do you feel you have?

She feels sexy because other guys are paying attention to her when she goes out. But if you trust her, this isnt really an issue anyways. I dont like the idea any more than you do, especially when it seems women make an effort to look better when they are going out than they do around their boyfriends. Such is life I guess. Most people seek the validation of themselves through other peoples eyes. If other people are paying attention to her, it boosts her self esteem. I think both of you are to blame. My advice to you, quit complimenting her, let her go out and do what she wants, and you go out and do what you want. Dont pay so much attention to her. Its not doing you any good, so you need to try something different.

Sounds like he is associating with the same sex. My advice to you would be to get out while you are still young enough to meet someone who can fufill your desires. You sound like a nice person who is honestly trying hard to work out the issues in your relationship, but that isnt getting you anywhere. What is happening is not your fault, thats all on him. He is ignoring your needs in favor of his own, and his needs seemingly are pointing in the direction of another man. You could try marriage counseling, but I doubt it will work. You have been putting up with this for two years, why put up with anymore? If he was open about what he wanted and communicated with you, my advice would be different, but his reactions to you are of anger and frankly, that of a spoiled child.

I have some buddies that were in the Navy and went to different ports (Thailand, Philippines, etc). Man, the stories they tell about their fellow servicemen getting HIV and other diseases made my skin crawl. Get some porn and use the hand dude, thats really about as safe as it is going to get over there. You dont want to gamble with your life on some bangtail anyways.

Why not ask her to meet up for lunch? Is that possible?

There isnt really much you can do, she already knows you dont like it and she is still friends with him anyways. You either have to accept this guy, or leave her. Have you met him in person?

No man, I grab on to her pigtails If the behind is a little larger than average, it depends on how it looks. If it has stretch marks, veins showing or cottage cheese, then ill pass on that a**. But yeah, I dont mind a girl with a jiggable pie once in a while, I am not too concerned with a girls behind though, I am more of a breast man myself.

Well I guess you will just have to trust her then, unless this is something you would rather not deal with. Maybe this guy is a good friend, or maybe she just loves being fawned over, im not sure.

When I have forgotten a girls name, I would always ask her how she spells her name. School is a great place to meet women, why not ask her to study with you? That would be an ideal situation to talk with her and find out if she is someone you would like to go out with. Dont let your past bring you down, you are only 20, and the baggage is going to keep piling up my friend. You just have to learn to wear the baggage you are carrying, so to speak, and use it to your advantage, and the advantage is experience.

Tell him you want to be his friend and thats it. If he cant handle that, then tell him to get lost.

I dont think it was wrong of you to say, if he knows you he knows you were just messing around. I wouldnt worry about it too much.