splendidlylost

Howdy again from Texas- I've recently gotten interested in a fashion design major from my college. To match her major, she's really creative with how she dresses and it's always vibrant and excitiing. As for myself, I have a great wardrobe- it all fits very well, it's all coordinated, but it lacks the same "oomph" as her wardrobe. Most of my clothes are from places like Gap, Express Mens, so while it's great looking, it's not as "out there" as her wardrobe. Will this be an issue for her?

Sharp thinking, Amra. Doing things like that at work is really hard to do...it's really hard if the person you're attracted is at work. But leading into an opportunity with a "I was thinking about going out this weekend, but..." is a nice way to do it. The one downside is that he may not read it that way.In my bouts of obliviousness, I know I've said something like, "Well, call some of your other friends or just take the time out for yourself" not knowing what her objective was.

Sometimes you have to be the one to say the first word. I'm still a little hesitant myself to make the first move, and it's difficult to do it. But the way I think about it- it's hard to talk to her that first time. It feels a lot worse to let that opportunity slip by.

We had that talk...the one where she says, "I feel really insecure about her..." and so forth. On a conscious level, she knows there's no threat at all, but like you said, she has to come to grips with that on her own. Incidentally, the girl V's worried about now had to deal with a similar problem with the girl I dated prior to her. In a way, you could say this is my fault, since I don't have the knock-down, drag-out break-up brawls that most people have. All of my relationships ended on pretty good notes, so that I'm friends with pretty much all of the people I've dated. I've been in this situation before, but V is having more difficulty in being secure in herself than the friend I'm talking about, so it's taking a little bit of a toll on me.

Find out the real deal on this guy, Surething and ask your g/f about him. I'm in a situation slightly similar to that of your g/f. I'm dating someone now who I'm happily in love with. However, she has more than understandable objections to my hanging out with a friend of mine who I also dated for about 3 years...but I haven't been with her for over a year now. My theory is that this guy is harmless, like my ex. We hang out and have a good time...and yeah, we go grab dinner, just us. But nothing comes of it. Since this guy has been trouble before, and nothing happened, it may just be that none of the other guys had the maturity and security to handle her having this guy friend. I can understand her situation, trying to convince my own g/f that there's nothing to worry about.

but any is appreciated. 1230am, my g/f signs off from her IM at her home about 1/2hour away from my apartment. We exchange the usual goodnight and I love you, and she signs off. Meanwhile, a friend of mine is going to make a late-night grocery run, so since V's heading to bed, I decide that it's going to be okay to head off. And as is a bad habit of mine, I leave my IM running. 1251am or so, my g/f signs on again wanting to say goodnight. I'm not home, so she doesn't get a response from me. She takes this is as my ignoring her, so she sends me an email that contained a mild level of hostility a general accusation of my ignoring her, and a reference to sketchy plans that're made for me to see a friend of mine who also happens to be an ex-girlfriend. 1.) I know I should put up an away message or sign off, but she said goodnight, so I figured that was it. 2.) We've had 2 discussions in the last 7 days about this friend of mine, all of which boil down to: "she's just my friend, and she's been just my friend for over a year." and, "I know it's an odd situation, but I don't believe in cutting a more than functional friendship because I'm not dating that particular person."

Don't worry about size. The vagina has an incredible ability to adjust itself to whatever penis size goes into it. I'm just about average, so you can trust me when I say that what'll really help you is foreplay. BUT- I don't know if I advocate sex at that age...so I'll stop there.

Switching to another way to stimulate works wonders. As much as I love my g/f now, I won't stay up for every position she likes to be in. Ask your partner to try her hands, mouth, or another position intermittenly to get you "up and running" again.

Make him more and more comfortable with it and he'll be fine over time. As for pressure, let him know that it's all from the outside world, not from you. All the "bigger penis" junk is nothing more than hype, and what's worse is that it's solely been designed to make money.

Everyone's on the right track. I also find that thrusting in a different direction that doesn't stimulate you as much helps as well.

I dance okay. The reason why the dancing=sex might be a myth is that oftentimes dance movements are done at the hip, so if a guy can dance, then it's assumed to be an indicator of how well he moves his hips during sex. If you're like me and you know that there's more to sex than just the forward push, then having two left feet on the dance floor (I've got incredible agility otherwise) isn't a problem.

Well, it sounds like you really love this guy, so I'd consider calling him. In relationships, there's no reason to wait around for him to call you. If he's as mature as she should be, even if he doesn't want to see you today, he should at least have the decency to answer the phone when you call him.

I'm honestly fine one way or another. Here's why I like her to make the first move: 1- It takes out SO much of the guesswork. On my side, at least. 2- If I'm already at that point with a girl, I'm going to reciprocate. 3- It shows that she's a proactive person, and that I won't be the one doing all the 'work' in the relationship. For me to make the first move is something that requires some heavy motivation on my part. I'm always unsure of it until I see/hear something that completely confirms the suspicions I already have. I've been about half/half with who makes the first move.

Again- Scout's right- a little grammar goes a long way. As for dealing with your situation, I say try to look past this for now. Find another thing to focus on (work/another girl/your free time) and things will die down. The time off will let things cool off and maybe something will happen. If not, then don't worry too much about it. She may still be your friend and you may find another, better person. After I broke up with my g/f of 3 years, I had to take some time away from her before we could really be close friends again. Now we're close as ever (with some ambiguous things happening every so often), but we're great friends.

I've been driving in a large city for years now and I'm still a little cautious about driving. Scout's advice is SPOT-ON. Getting someone that makes you feel really comfortable and relaxed will really help you out. And after you get the hang of it, remember that a little fear is normal. I'm still cautious of what's going on around me on the freeway, and that's just common sense. No one will complain about a safe driver.

So- I met this really interesting girl the other day, and we talked for a bit and [key point] she gave me her phone number so we could set up a day to get lunch together. The conversation went really well (unless she's an excellent actor and my comm. studies time has failed me), and I do like how I didn't have to ask for her number (yeah, it's her number). I followed the customary 1-day wait to call her back, and so far...no call back. I'm normally really composed about meeting girls and whatnot, but this girl's had me all shaken up since I saw her.

Since her family holds strong to its aristocratic English roots, she took it in classic English manner. She just stared at me with a blank expression on her face (as she always did in situations like this).

Thanks for support, fellas. I just felt bad doing it because at the core, she is a nice, great looking, and intelligent girl. I'd normally only call off a relationship if she did something like cheat/mistreat me, but I've never come accross this in my entire dating history. She does make a great friend, but that's about all.

I can't give you exactly techniques, since they're all really context-based, but you can start with the old standby of "Hi, how are you?". Just try not freak out, and heck, maybe if you do freak out, she'll like it. Just be you, it's the easiest thing to do.

I'll make this fast. I dated a girl for 6 months, and after some deliberation, broke things off. My major complaints were: 1. She's emotionally cold. The night before I did call it off, I had an emotional pouring out where she didn't even flinch. I don't know if that registered in her mind, if she cared, or what. This also translates into a complete lack of physical affection (yeah, not even a decent hug, folks). Her excuse was that she warned me that she "wasn't going to be really feminine" in terms of emotion. I'm not asking her to be girly, I'm asking her to be human. 2. She didn't want to really extend herself. I remember her once saying that she didn't like the idea of having to put forth real effort into a relationship. Why? Part of this is how the women in her (archaic) family operate; the women stay at home and do whatever while the men work. Just in their relationships, the men extend themselves and the women just sit and act pretty. I busted tail for 6 months and barely saw any effort on her part. She rarely called or messaged first, almost never planned dates, has really never done anything for me (even small things), and sadly, didn't even plan to do anything for my 22nd birthday (next Tuesday). 3. She was downright lazy or badly prioritized. Cases in point: She's apparently unable to voice her emotions, so she was supposedly working on a letter that was supposed to let me know how she really feels. I waited on it for 2 weeks, and on one occasion, she told me that she put off the writing of this important letter so she can read some novel. Sorry dear, but the novel isn't going anywhere...but I am (and I did go somewhere). Before a day I knew I was going to be very busy, and she was completely available the whole day, I asked her if she could run to a restaurant and get me some food right about 2 or 3pm. She said she couldn't, although she (less than a minute before) said she wasn't doing anything that day. Well, I get home and asked her what she did that day. She said she did some reading and looked around on the internet...and she didn't start that until 4pm. ...That about sums it up. Thanks in advance, everyone.[/i]

Sounds like a plan. As for the roommate, he moved out weeks ago. And, he took his fleas with him. Heh...sucker.

I fogged out the entire place. Now what?

He misses you. You're a lucky girl, so unless he's got something to hide, enjoy it.

Thanks folks. This reminds of what my parents told me as a kid, "If you keep your place clean, you'll never have to worry about pests." Heh. Shows what they know. I'm a clean freak that has fleas. Thankfully, this isn't that bad. I've seen bad infestations (used to work for a vet's office and had to go with animal protection on a few incidents).

I think it was the dog...we took her cats to the vet the other day and neither was showing signs of fleas for any period of time. So it was that idiot roommate's dog. As if it wasn't bad enough that he skipped out on his share of two month's power...eh, the other roommate and I thought he was a wacko anyways. I bought the Adams Fogger; it gets the eggs and larvae and is effective for 7 months. I'll pretend they said 4. I deployed the fogger in my room and the living room and it worked. Unfortunately, since my apartment has separate leases for all roommates, the room that had the dog in it is locked up. Which means I have to talk to the management and get the other room open so I can fog it as well. I may end up doing the entire place. Bah...now I really don't like that guy.