hoppy26

i am still having trouble "moving on". its been almost 3 months since she told me "she needed a break". 1 month since we have talked. she hurt me in a very decieving way. i never got any answers. she is with someone.....probably the reason she left. i dont see her or them but hear they are seen alot together. she lies to people about there relationship, but yet she knows i know. why am i still not letting go? why do i sit here wondering what happened....why it happened? i cant get over the fact she just walked away after 3 years. she was my best friend aswell so this hurts even more. i went through the whole sad then mad thing and i thought i was moving on.....but it seems to be starting all over again. can any one give me some advice?

from a guy who was in this situation with his parents( me when i was 13....now 26). my father walked out one my mother, my sister, my half-brother(hes my brother) and me. i cant say after all these years i have trully forgiven my father. i love him very much. he left for another woman. that eneded up not lasting to long. that was even more fuel to my fire. i guess what im trying to say is......my mother has raised all three of us since then. she works full time, helped put us in college/tech school, and the list could go on. my father is also disabled. his life changed overnight. a major brain anurism and stroke to everything he ever had away.....except for imidiate family. his wife lives in NC while he lives in CT. weird tough situtaion. YOU CAN DO THIS ALONE MY FRIEND!!!!!!!! BE THE FATHER YOU ARE OBLIGATED TO BE. IN THE BEST POSSABLE WAY YOU CAN.. no matter what happens with your wife you have wonderful children that will never leave your side. my mother believes she has become better off. i believe you will to.

im not a mean person.....dont get me wrong. my heart was torn out....stomped on...and kicked. all buy the girl i though was "the one". i dont wish hurt or bad thing to happen to her. she walked away without an ounce of remorse. my mother once said " the sweetest revenge is to not let them have the satisfaction....and just move on". do you believe this to be true? do you believe that is considered revenge? i mean i had no choice to cut ties with her....she was decieving me and lying to me. what are other types of revenge? im not talking about keying cars or anything silly like that. would she even feel anything after i cut the ties and move on? she seemed to want it that way. just looking for some feedback. thanks

here is my advice........if your looking to find an honest girl. dont be looking in the clubs. especially if she is a regular. i dont think you came on to strong. i just think she is "that type of girl" and really you are better off. of course clubs/bars are known to provide soem one night stands. if thats what you are looking for. goodluck

if she really wants to find/contact you she will no matter how hard it is. my ex did the same thing....false hope, manipulation....etc. dont bother until she trully makes you feel like shes ready if you choose to take her back. i would let her go. youll be better off when you find that person that wont ever need a break.

im not married....but maybe this will help. sit him down(without any distractions) and tell him what you feel.(id die for an honest woman). tell him this is serious and you of course want to work on things. this has to be done buy the both of you....equally. give and take and come to an happy medium. maybe you two are due for a weekend away.....alone. i like to call it a "gormet weekend". get a nice room, dress sharp, treat yourself to a nice dinner, take a nice bath together. dress sexy for him. have "gormet sex".....not just your on the whim sex. take your time, enjoy it, explore. hope this maybe will help you. i think its good for any relationship. married or not

buddy.....im going through a similar situation..........atliest she was honest enough to tell you what she was feeling. she wanted to see other people. atliest you have a reason to move on with. it sucks i know!!!!!!! but imagine your ex telling you she needed a break(she didnt know why) and then finding out from everyone but her she was cheating on you and is seeing the guy she cheated on you with. thats my story. i still havent gotten the closer i need...and its been almost 3 months. i had to cut ties with her. she was manipulating and decieving me into believing the break was really just a break.....but she never could tell me a straight yes or no answer. let her go man. do not beg, try, plead to get answers out of her or back together. if when you talk she is walking over you then cut the ties. if she really wants to talk to you she will find a way no matter how hard it is. this is all stuff i have learned through my breakup. goodluck

thanks for the advice. ill try that if i get into the situation. thankyou

im going to a graduation party next weekend. for those of you who havent seen my posts me ex girlfirend of 3 years basically blew me off and told me abunch of lies. she has a new person in her life.....i dont. this party this weekend is for my best friends girlfriend...also my ex's old friend. they dont hang out at all anymore but she may still be there(with her man) because they are friends with alot of the grads friends....get it? basically if they do show up how should i compose myself? im not going to cause a seen....but what if she tries to talk to me or i just feel down right uncomfortable? i havent seen her or talked to her in a month. any advice? i have alot of hurt feelings from her.....i might want to puke the 1st time i see her. since this party is going to be alot of her friends....am i putting myself in a bad situation? should i just not go? and send my regards in another form? please help im really nervous.

how does one deal with being decieved/manipulated/lied to/cheated on, buy a girl that you spent believing for the last three years was the one and could never be this kind of person? i am devasteted over this. i got no answers, a bunch of lies i had to find out through other people and she wont contact me(i gave up contacting her...she was walking all over me and messing with my head). i cant get it out of my head and its been almost three months since this all came on. we havent talked in a month and i havent seen her in almost 2 months. she walked away so easily.....and left me with nothing? why and how do people do this to others? what would you guys do in this type of situtaion?

i think the key here is that you said "i want this to work out but she doesnt". the hard part about dealing with a breakup is coming to terms that one party doesnt want it anymore. without two there is no relationship. i would try and talk with her one more time if you feel it might help. ask her if she really feels that it is really over or can it be resolved with the work from both of you. goodluck

if and it has happened 3 times to date, you decide to cheat on me for whatever reason......that is it. there are no second chances. no excuses. if you want to sleep with other people, tell the one your with that they are just not the one. dont go causing unrestless pain and confusion to the person who you supposedly love. my 2 cents. my father did it to my mother. i have every reason in the world to have a hate for people who feel infidelity is a way out of a bad relationship.

scotchtape.....we never did go talk with someone. she mentioned it, i said yes i would go if she wanted that to happen, and it was never brought up again. we dont talk now so i dont know if she really meant it or was just saying it.did i do the right thing buy cutting all ties? i want to call her but she just hurts me when i do, and lies to me. i did ask if she was seeing someone on 4 or 5 occasions and she told me no.

im a 26 yearold guy that was broken up with buy a 23 yearold girl. heres what happened........she called me one afternoon to tell me after 3 years she needed a break. ok???? she was confused about "life" and couldnt give me a straight answer on what a break meant to her. to me its alittle time apart with the intentions of getting back together....no??? anyway......i told her i wasnt mentally able to handle these types of games as i went through them in the relationship before this one. she told me she needed a break to find out she was cheating on me and ended up seeing the guy for awhile only to get dumped 3 months later and try to come back to me. it all really messed me. so........i i told her if she was breaking up with me that i wasnt going to wait for her to pull the same game. to make along story short.......i couldnt do it. i needed to talk to her, see her, anything to have her still in my life. i wanted to help her with her problems and work this all out. but still all i got was a load of "i dont knows". her parents made her go see a phsyciatrist to deal with her problems. i have no idea what they are....she want talk to me about anything. for almost 2 months we would talk on and off, only if i called her. she would tell me she missed me alot and that she felt she was making the biggest mistake of her life. she asked if i would take her back at one point and even if id go to talk with someone with her. of course i said yes.......this was the girl i thought was the one. i would do anything at this point. then it all went crazy.......id call her to see how she was doing. she wouldnt return my calls. she finally called back 5 days later to tell me she was busy........and then told me she couldnt talk she was pulling into the bar to meet some friends. i was really hurt form all this.....i wanted to talk, i wanted answers. we hung up and havent talked since then almost a month ago. since ive heard she is seeing somebody and may have been cheating on me. i tried calling to ask her but go no respones. i dont know this guy at all except that he was in the navy. ill be getting checked out soon to clear my mind. that was the knife that really hurt....i was lied to, manipulated, and decieved by the girl i thought i was going to spend the rest of my life with, and she did it in a very harsh way. ive been on an emotional rollercoaster ever since. not nowing the truth.....what was lies what wasnt. have i done the right thing buy not calling her. should i seek answers from people that may know? i was close with her parents......her mother was especially upset about the situtaion. her father i havent seen since she took her "break".lol what should i do? dont contact the mother or father and just remember that if she wanted to contact me and tell me she could. i cant believe someone could do a thing like this to a person......and then lie about the whole thing. man oh man.

pal i feel your pain. i am going through a similar situation. my advice to you is dont get your self involved again. i believe once a cheat always a cheat and if she did it once(she did it more) she'll most likely do it again. your only setting yourself up for even more disaster and almost letting her get away with it. the cheater never really understands the true pain of the other person. feelings that cant be described in words. even though she said she has changed........i wouldnt take the risk. what has been done has been done and unless you can dig real deep and let ALL that go. youll never be as happy as you deserve to be with this girl. sorry man, it took me along time and still im working on releasing my pain caused by my ex. nobody deserves to be treated that way.