KM
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Everything posted by KM
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I understand that you love him, but you need to give him the boot. He obviously had mal-intent, and of course it would eventually lead to sex. He married you, he took a solem vow that he wouldn't be screwing other women... I'm still young though, so, my advice might not be the best, but I think you should throw him out. That, or at least punish him by never giving him sex from you again... make him suffer, make him realize what he can't have...
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It's one thing to look at porn if you're not in a relationship, but if you have a girlfriend, and especially if you're married, men shouldn't watch the porn stuff... Me, I'm a guy, if I was lucky enough to have a girlfriend, I could control myself...
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I'm not sure what to say? Any reason why she might not be willing to give it up? Try to wow her a couple of times. Take her out to dinner, buy her presents, but don't make it obvious that you want sex when you get back home. Do this a few times, and let her make the move. If after like the 3rd time she doesn't bring it up, ask her "hey, wanna go upstairs?" Then, if she still says no, maybe seek professional help... Still, this is the advice from just me, I'm not an expert. Good luck with it though...
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I see this from another point of view. She likes YOU and the other guy. Tell me, is the "other guy" a friend of yours? If you have no personal connection with him, why not try to go for this girl. Why should you bow out (forfeit/giveup) the competition and not the other guy? If she however chooses the other guy, don't feel bad, her loss. But, don't just walk away from it, she's fair game if she "likes you both" and this other dude "isn't a friend of yours"
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out of a bad long relationship and into a new relationship
KM replied to girlshurt's topic in Dating Advice
Love is a bunch of pain. You never know unless you try, so I say go for it and don't be afraid to get hurt. Well, that's hard to say, but, if you don't keep trying, you never will find that special someone. Don't just go askin everyone though, that's not the way to go. If you see someone you like, don't let fear chase you away... Good luck... -
The wedding might be a good place. I've heard of people who actually propose to someone else while at a wedding, so, just talking to someone shouldn't be that big of a deal... good luck
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You're probably going to hate me for this, but I'm not familiar with those movies. (I don't see movies very often) Anyway, if we're going to get to the root of your problems, I guess we need to figure out "why do you feel the urge to watch them over and over?" What is it about those movies that you find so appealing? Or what force makes you watch them?
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Peter_L, the "holding on to her" and "not letting go" is normal, at least I think it is... Me, I've never had a girlfriend, but, I've had a crush on the same girl for over four years, and I can't get over her. But, time heals all wounds. It was wrong of her to just leave you though, she's the one at fault, not you. She doesn't realize what a great guy you are and what she's walking away from. She'll never find someone who cares as much as you do, and maybe someday she'll realize that, maybe she'll even cry...
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Don't feel bad. If anything, it's probably not "what he's seen or heard" but what he HASN'T "heard or seen" I got my first sex talk when I was around 7. Didn't go into 'all' the specifics, just to cut and dry part. A guy does this, and this leads to this, and that's how a woman has a baby... You need to just have a good talk with him. Don't attack what he did, he only did it cause he doesn't know any better. Answer his questions, and tell him why he shouldn't do that, etc... I mean, if no one ever told you not to do that, it doesn't seem like such a bad idea in theory does it? Well, I'm not an expert, so get a second opinion, but I think that he just needs a sex talk... -KM
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All things in moderation. If you can have a puff once or twice a year and it not affect you, more power to you, however, 9 times out of 10 you end up using it more and more and eventually you're just a pothead jerk. The stuff is addicting. It makes you stupid. (Seriously, it makes you stupid) I'd advise you to stay away from it, however, if you can handle it, more power to you...
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unhappygrl, don't feel bad. Sure you may have had some bad past experiences, but I assure you, my tales are much much sader. Things will get better. In fact, love will be better as you grow. I'm not sure how old you are, but, love doesn't begin to even take a serious playing field until you're like 20 years old or older... so, don't dread it... Good luck
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I'll be blunt, women are not as horny as men. Just because you couldn't resist the urge if you were spending the night with a girl in a tent doesn't mean your girlfriend can't. Now, this does not mean everything's all dry and clean cut. There is a chance she could be up to something, but I doubt it. First of all, now realize, she is a woman, but, from a man's point of view, you'd think that if she WAS planning a sexual rendevous that she would lie about what she was going to do in the first place. She'd say "I'll be camping with my girlfriends from work for a week." or "I'm going out of town on business for a week." The fact she tells you what she's doing seems to nullify that. The only thing to fear is if she is REALLY REALLY smart. In that sense, she TELLS you she's going camping so you WILL think that she wouldn't be dumb enough to tell you she's going camping if she was going to pull something. But that just gets into too much mind games. Don't forbid her to go, just let it be known you're "uncomfortable" with it, but that you do "trust her" Good luck
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Long story short, I've had a crush on this girl for like 4-5 years. Now, you've got to realize, she is the most beautiful girl in real life that I have ever seen. I mean, she's perfect, I've never seen anything bad about her. Yet, she has a boyfriend and has had the same boyfriend since I first met her. She knows that I really like her though, at least I'm pretty sure she does. Anyway, what I'm about to say sounds sad and pathetic, but it's my "brilliant plan" I'll go off to college, get a really good job, and make lots of money. This will take about 10-14 years to pull off... Now, once I've done all this, I'll hope for one of the following. One, her relationship with her boyfriend (who she'll probably end up getting married to) has fizzeled and they broke up. Or, she'll currently be taken. Either way, I'll somehow see to it that she finds out about my success. Hopefully she'll be so blown away by how rich and powerful I've become that she'll forget her current lover and fall for me. So, what do you guys think? I know it's got to be lame for me to think of this. You know, I don't even care if it's lame, just tell me if you think it might work...
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You should be ok. Be glad that it's cool her family. Me however, there's this one girl, and I actually do really like her for her mind, she's wise beyond her years, but, at my age she's jailbait, plus she has a boyfriend already... But, 15 and 12 seems "ok" but keep in mind, she might not be fully developed yet... 12 seems young, but you are only 3 years apart. Good luck
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Ok, the really odd thing is he doesn't want his friends to know about you. He asked you to marry him, if he "truly" loves you like he claims, and if he's always huggin you, etc... he seems like the guy who should be shouting at the top of his lungs running down the street going "I love (yourname) and I'm gonna marry her." He could just be trying to be macho, but he doesn't seem like the macho type. I would keep an eye on him, see if he's up to anything. You'd be surprised how poorly men cover their tracks...
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abomi_nation, I can somewhat share your feelings. I have never had a girlfriend, yet I've had a crush on the same girl for the past 4-5 years. But, enough about my problems. Here's what I suggest to you. Go up to your friend and say somethin like "hey, I'm not doin anything this summer, wanna go get pizza sometime?" Then, leave it at that. She can take that as either a "friendly get pizza" or a "more than friendly get pizza" Then, go from there. If she doesn't call you up, then don't sweat it and move on, you can always be friends, good luck... P.S. I hope that it works out for you. Be sure to not be too overbearing, give her some space. And I really hope you find happiness, since it seems like I'm not going to any time soon
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Here's my opinion on this... Just think about it. Whether you're male or female, think of your mate watching porn. Doesn't feel too good does it? That is why we don't have this big "who cares" thing. When you're with someone, especially married, you're supposed to be "with them." Now, I admit, for the most part we men are pigs and we'll stare at a hot chick walkin by whether we have a sex partner right now or not. But, looking at a passer byer versus going to porn sites, that's just wrong. I mean, why should a man feel the need to go look at other people naked? I know this is all very sensitive, but I would confront them. If confronted and they think there's "nothing wrong" with what they've been doing, then there IS something wrong. I think that for the most part, you give up your porn watchin rights once you are with someone seriously, unless they are in on it...
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"All things in moderation" Porn just has a bad connotation to it. And, we all have an image in our minds that most people who watch it are obsessed with it. Now, there are different levels of porn. You've got your softcore, which is essentially anything on latenight cinemax. They just show a bunch of boobs, and the sex is fake. Then you've got your hardcore stuff which is real sex, real this, real that, and it makes a mess in more ways that one... Honestly, I think that if you're just stickin to the softcore stuff you've got nothin to worry about, as long as it's in moderation. It's a good tool for people like me who can't get women in real life...
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This is my first post... jessica, I'll be honest. I'm a guy, and if I had a girlfriend I wouldn't be cybering online with other girls. That just seems wrong. You have every right to not want him to do that. You should just ask him, "If you have me, why do you have this desire to be cybering with strangers?" As for the 2 women at once, I'll tell you right now, as a guy, that is like the "ultimate fantasy." Even though odds are it will never ever ever in a million years happen to me, that is in the back of all our minds, it's just like "an unachievable piece of orgasmic excellence." Now, even though I lack experience in the subject matter, normally I would say that bringing in another woman would complicate matters. If your boyfriend is already cybering, then he'd have times that he'd just be having sex with the new woman. Now, the following MIGHT happen, just a might. He could take the whole extra woman thing as the green light to have sex with all the other women he wants as well. For the most part, he's a man, he'll rationalize that "she doesn't mind me boinking other women" then he could go nuts. But I digress. To sum it up, he shouldn't be cybering. If he won't give that up he really doesn't deserve you. I mean, he's got a woman who is considering the whole threesome aspect, and that is just, well, paradise as far as a hormone driven man is concerned... I'll leave the whole "should I have a threesome" question up to you guys, but I'm sure he'd thank you for it...