charley

There's a thread here about how to get acne under control. Many people posted good ideas. I posted there too. I know the stuff I posted works good. Others ideas might work too. Your "friends" are not your friends. I was popular in grade school and college. In junior high and high school I made a conscious decision to go it alone because those people were not worth hanging around with. Being alone is better than having enemies posing as friends. Seriously. If you are in high school, take heart. Life after high school is MUCH better for most of us. Except the popular people in high school like football players and cheerleaders. Their life is often pretty much over after high school. Hey I run into jerks and former jerks from high school sometimes, even today. I can't help LMAO when I meet fomerly hot babes who now outweigh me, or are more wrinkled up from excessive suntanning. I love when that happens! Then, add to that the fact that I've gotten better looking after high school. So when I run into those people now, it's role reversal time. Aha ha ha haah! Ahhhhhhhhh! Poetic justice you fat wrinkled exbabe beoches! Also, some of the formerly cool, arrogant guys who now don't have a pot to piss in. More poetic justice! Things will get better for you. For now, weed out your bad "friends" from your real friends. Go it alone if you must. Work on your acne. There's much that can be done for acne that cost little or no money.

TheRedQueen is kind, as well as wise.

That rope choking and other choking is seriously scary stuff. I wouldn't choke a woman, even if she wanted me to. Why don't you offer to spank her bare bottom hard with your bare hand. If she likes that, maybe she'll have an equally stimulating, yet much safer substitute. I don't think getting spanked with a hand it going to injure anyone, yet it would be quite stimulating and exciting for her. There are also be any number of other sexual things she'd find exciting that are not dangerous. Find a safe substitute activity. Find several safer substitute activities. If that's not enough, then do all the substitute activities at the same time. Just a suggestion. I'm trying to be helpful.

You can never have to many women at work, IMO. I work at a place where 90% of the employees and about 66% of management are women. Probably 80% of the customers are women too. I love it, but then I like women, well most women. If a guy didn't like women, then it could be a rough place to work. We've had a guy or two work there in the past who didn't like women. Those guys were always unhappy, they made the women unhappy, and the women eventually chewed them up and spit them out and they were not able to continue working there. Bear in mind that most management there are women too. So those guys eventually got the boot and rightly so. I'm lucky I like most women, 'cause most of them like me in return. I love going to work and seeing everyone.

Sure, it's not anger, it's concern about another human being.

Ever ask him in class loudly enough for others to hear, if his venerial diseases have cleared up? I've done that to a player guy once when women were around for an audience. Some guys just have it coming.

That is Batya's opinion, with all due respect. However, there are hundreds, if not thousands of threads here that show otherwise. Many times a man is attracted, but shy, and doesn't move forward. Often, the more attracted to the woman he is, the more shy he behaves. That's not just my opinion. There's hundreds or thousands of threads that back that up. Batya means well, but her answer is not an indication of the reality, but rather of her personal impatience with shy men. She just doesn't have the patience to deal with them. Simple as that. However, a guy can be very intereted and shy or afraid to proceed at the same time. That's a fact as shown by overwhelming evidence in my personal life, and also in many threads here at E. The real question is does the OP have the patience and motivation to try to work things out with a shy guy. If she does, then it could work. A shy person is much like a shy cat. It wants to be petted, but is afraid. Gentle, yet persistent coaxing can overcome that over time, as anyone who knows cats knows. It may sound like I'm over simplifying by comparing shy people to shy cats, but I'm not. It's a very similar thing.

Actually, I think the problem with cat calling is that sometimes it's used disrespectully, or to intimidate. Sometimes this is intentional, other times accidental. If I was with another guy, no way would I cat call a woman then because she'd be embarrassed and maybe intimidated. If it was dark, no way would I cat call a woman because it'd scare her. However, if it's broad daylight, and I'm by myself, and she's by herself or with one or more of her lady friends so she can feel safe, then I'd consider a polite cat call because I know she won't be frightened. For example, "You're beautiful!" or maybe one wolf whistle and then, "You're beautiful!" Under the right circumstances, and with an polite cat call, I think a woman can have fun with it and either enjoy the compliment, or humor, or both. Under the wrong circumstances, or with a rude or inappropriate cat call, it can frighten, offend, or anger her. It also depends on the guy's tone of voice and how he looks. Some guys look scary and others look kind and friendly. Only a few women at E have seen my pics, but those who have would agree that I look kind and friendly, not scary. So I could get away with a polite cat call during daylight hours under appropriate circumstances without frightening anyone. Not that I ever have actually cat called a stranger, but I know I could do it without frightening or offending. I do occasionally politely cat call certain of my women friends and they get a kick out of it. If I did cat call a woman locally, I'd want to make sure that she can feel safe and have fun with it, and enjoy herself, just like a couple women had fun with me right here in this thread cat and dog calling back and forth with me. If it's done in such a way that the woman can feel safe and have a good time, then I think it's OK. However, many men don't know how to do that, and some don't care. So that brings us back to why cat calling can be a problem.

Any time I was to shy, women started trying to build up my confidence to a suitable level. Any time I was to cocky (only happens occasionally), they started trying to tear down my confidence to a suitable level. I think most women want a guy who's in between those extremes. A guy who's emotionally well rounded. So a little retained shyness, or demureness, is a good thing, as long as not to extreme.

For what it's worth, I think shy people are a lot like shy cats. They want to be petted, but some persistent, gentle coaxing is required. Similar thing.

Excellent. I like it. However, add to that a request for his phone number. That way you are on equal footing and you have the option to call him. I see nothing wrong with calling a guy, especially a shy guy. I suggest your email reply include a request to exchange phone numbers.

Dragon Lady? You? You're a sweetie.

How about the classic "Schwingggg!" or my personal modification "Schwingggg aling aling". If I'm with one of my platonic women friends who I don't have any attractions to, or she's taken, and some hot 3rd party babe walks by, I'll quietly say to my friend, "Oooooooh baaaby! Schwingggg aling aling!" while we both watch 3rd party babe walk on by and my friend quietly giggles.

Hayseed? Isn't that a classic insult to country people? I dunno about that one. Peaches might be good.

Snugglebunny

I think it could definitely be a nice short term relationship (say 5 years or less). It might also workout longterm, maybe, but maybe not. Who knows? Of course, that could also be true of someone your age too.

I think it's the combination of clothes and attitude-behavior that works, or doesn't work.

Maybe your friendship is evolving into a dual friendship and romance. If so, congratulations. Your story reminds me a bit of my first GF who started getting cuddly and affectionate that way after being friends for 6 months. After about a month of cuddly type behavior on her part, she asked me out for date and told me her feelings. It was really nice once I adjusted to it and recovered from my initial shock.

You can continue to be friends with him, but don't date until you're 18. Isn't that exactly what your mother would tell you?

Age does matter when one person is under the legal age of consent.

Follow your girlfriend's advice in OP. That's exactly what I'd tell you too. This guy makes you happy, which is the opposite of what other men were doing. So enjoy him today, and keep your eye out in case he either changes his mind, or someone else better who wants same as you comes along. At the very least, you can be happy for a year or three. Isn't that better than being lonely and single and unhappy like before? In best case scenario, things might work out longterm. If not, at least you'll have a few happy years before being single again.

It appears to me that he's already invested years into you. So he'll wait another year or two, if you need him to, especially if you are still actively friends and doing friends activities. I do agree that talking to him about your mutual feelings, your fears and insecurities, and your need to wait a while before dating, are all good ideas. Talking can only help and won't hurt if you are truly compatible. I think you are compatible as shown by the number of years he's already invested in you and how comfortable you've been with each other.