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Creamybutter

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  1. Thats the thing! a lot of people think its my responsibility to be KIND and stop being his friend. So im really confused.
  2. i also think this has more to do with your relationship with your husband than your desire to be with a woman which you think will compensate that void. Try and fix the relationship..
  3. hello...so i have told him very clearly, and he said he wanted to stay friends as it would be sad to lose the connection we had...which i agree with. there is something very sincere and nice between us. Although i guess ive been trying to distance a bit just because i feel like it might be healthier for both of us.. He talks about other women but im not sure if its to get a reaction or generally being a friend and sharing stuff....i will never know really!
  4. Thanks for the advice. Some replies are a bit rude, “stop being an a hole” really?? I thought this was a place where people could come and ask for advice - not get judged. If you think I’m making a mistake you can tell me in a better way? Anyways, thank you for taking the time.
  5. Hi, I really need some help here. I’ve had a lot of struggle trying to find guys I connect with and recently I came across one who was a lot like me, we instantly connected (online) and could talk endlessly. We met in person and it all came crashing down as I was turned off by his appearance body language and hygiene. He’s also quite small framed and I feel huge and somewhere that makes me feel less feminine. (No offence to anyone- these are just my issues!) I also didn’t like being touched by him much- especially if there was more than a platonic feel to it. He put his hand on my thigh once and I was hoping he would remove it. Generally I noticed I didn’t enjoy any romantic touch from him. I had no issues hugging him but the thought of kissing him was not even entering my mind. I gave it a few months but nothing changed.... I didn’t want to sit too close or have any contact, yet our conversations feel so deep and connected. He’s a super great guy with all the qualities I admire in a person, and I think he cares about me a lot which is so hard to come by :( I had to tell him that I only see him as a friend and nothing more so he agreed to stay friends And I felt like he understood. But Somewhere I feel he’s still hoping I’ll change my mind and I feel by being his friend, I’m giving him false hope. So do I let him go? Really in a difficult spot.
  6. Ok thank you all. it’s really unfortunate when you like someone as a person and are so compatible but feel no attraction or chemistry. Like I would not want to get close to them or kiss them but fine with hugs as friends. I didn’t like the way they smelled or looked and no natural desire to get close. I battled with this for a while and finally realised I had to end it. Is this very common? It’s just really sad coz I find it difficult to come across guys who I share a connection with :(
  7. so i met this guy on a dating app a year ago, and loooong story short - he was very interested in me, we had a great connection but when we met in person I felt no chemistry at all. We stayed in touch for a while to see if there was anything there but i was just not feeling it so i was very honest with him. We kind of stayed as friends as we had a great rapport and similar wavelength...and pretty clear that I have no romantic aspirations here. Recently i met his friend who is also single and i really like him. Now im not sure what to do because im not directly in touch with his friend and its too awkward to ask him. What do I do?
  8. So I met this guy online... Eventually he used to call me everyday and we talked for hours. This went on for a month or two. I was having difficulties in other areas of my life...was very depressed.. so ghosted him. Never responded or returned his calls. He sent me a text that he never felt this connection and this way about anyone and wished I could atleast give it a chance..i didnt even respond and that was my bad. Its been 3 years.... I recently came across his contact and just texted...not sure why...maybe to apologise...maybe curiosity.. He responded back and immediately asked if we could meet. I said yes. I then looked through his social media profile to check if we is single and noticed he's completely transformed at the gym and turned into this really fit guy. He was quite chubby earlier. I so didnt see this coming. I look the same :/..maybe older. I'm not sure how to go about this now...will he still be interested? Will he be mad at me? Should I apologise? feeling a bit anxious really.
  9. So we work in a co-working space with people from different companies. The last few weeks I've been sitting in a particular area of the building and doing my work. The seat is such that when anyone passes by, it's natural to look up /look at them. There was this guy who sits there and we ended up glancing at each other way too many times because he kept walking past me. I was feeling really awkward about it. Later that evening I saw him from a distance and our eyes instantly met for a few seconds and he kept looking so I just looked away. The next day, I almost felt like he walked past me a little more. I did everything possible to be normal and not look up as much but probably was a bit awkward. We later bumped into each other at the parking and we just blankly looked at each other. He is pretty cute. To avoid the awkwardness (plus I had a lot of work so couldn't afford distractions) I sat elsewhere for a few days. Today, again our eyes met from a distance as I was walking to the exit. I'm usually the one to look away. It's been a week of this now...😂 Does he think I like him 🤦♀️
  10. Wow, thank you for the replies! I see all kinds of responses. It's a 2 hour flight away. I'm OK with him not taking this forward but he's the one who keeps texting and calling me (i barely initiate). I even stopped responding at one point but he came back. So not sure what he wants from me really.
  11. So I have a really close guy friend who got married recently. Now I'm really close to both him and his wife. They both live in my city. I went to his home city for their wedding, he introduced me to his best man (childhood best friend) who was/is also single. We had a few conversations, the guy was really busy at the wedding and my trip was short. I did notice he was super caring and an amazing friend - was doing a lot for our mutual friend who was getting married. Just generally sweet, taking care of us so well as a host. It was very kind. A few months later I added him on facebook just to thank him for everything and shortly after we started texting. This is where it gets confusing. The guy is extremely reserved but would text me a lot. We would have repetitive conversations.... ones that wouldnt go very far, mostly small talk about the weather and how I should visit their city again... general topics. It didnt help that we live in different cities so there was no real connect felt. He then planned a trip to our city, and only told me about it - asked me about where to stay and how to travel around and about his dates. He reached here and the three of us obviously hung out, it was a crazy night with too much to drink. He was hitting on me openly in a very funny way and overall it was just a lot of laughs mostly because none of us were sober and he can be crazy fun and loud. I havent laughed so much in years. He was an absolute gentleman through it all.... besides my friend was with us so nothing weird. Again, just plain fun - at no point do I get to know the real him. The next day we were all hung over and he was super quiet and a bit awkward around me. Still sweet but awkward for sure. He left the same day. he continued texting me often but there is no real conversation happening. I still dont feel like I know him and quite honestly wonder how he isnt bored as yet. So the last time he texted, I actually told him that I'm unable to crack this one and finding it tough to get to know him and i think he felt a bit bad. I tried to say it as nicely as possible because I was just wondering what is even the point of keeping in touch?? He then called me the next day and it felt a bit different, i have no idea what happened but somewhere down the conversation (not sure what it was) but I felt my heart get a bit faster. I think it was his tone or the way he was talking but there was def something there. I wondered if I had feelings for him because I couldnt stop thinking about him for the rest of the evening....and was really confused. Hes gone quiet again, so maybe Im reading too much into this? I just dont know what he wants and if this is even going anywhere.
  12. Hello! So I started running +walking 5K or more 6 days a week in the mornings. I eat quite healthy already (no sugar no glutten no fried no processed) and a plant based diet... My metabolism has always been slow since I was a child. And I'm against dieting because in the long run it never works for me. It's been nearly 3 weeks and I'm not really seeing any results. I'm beginning to get worried. I am about 8-10 pounds overweight. How long does it take to see any change?
  13. Thanks batya, what about him asking if I can meet him for coffee or a movie?
  14. I'm not hanging around him at all. I just go for these shows because I enjoy them. I don't even talk to anybody or him. He approaches me so I talk back. That's all.
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