nancy_9535

commitment can be tough... simply show your partner why they would want a commitment to a relationship... of course there are good points and bad points but as long as you two love each other... the good points will completely rule out the bad points... and he'll realize the goodness of a commitment

honestly... only he knows what he feels and you know what you feel but from what I read ... it sounds like you two are in love... its been hard on both of you... but if you two truly love each other... then by the time you come back you two will still love each other. just keep in contact with him. But remember... him loving you and you not being where he can see you(like... around his neighborhood... being able to go out on dates and such) is really tough for him... life goes by fast... and no one should have to continuously wait for someone. But if they think that certain someone is worth waiting for (which i'm sure you are cause you sound very kind hearted and considerate) then once those two separated people get back together... it won't matter how far apart you were... it will just matter that you two are together and both of you can't live without each other.

You should be able to trust your girlfriend... no matter what you two should be honest with each other... I do believe, however, that a few times...even though i despise people who lie... that she lied so she wouldn't upset you... it makes a girl feel special when two guys are fighting over her... she feels worth something i suppose... if it ever comes up again... as in you and her thinking about giving it another shot... I suggest you first find out why she lied... if she claims she never lied... even though it may hurt... you may want to gently break to her a few clues that you found... tell her that if you two can't be honest with each other, then you simply don't want to be together (if thats how you feel) We're still unsure if she wants to get back with her ex... she may just want to still be friends with him... and just friends... but lying about contacting him isn't a good sign... but this may be ... because you told her to break all ties with him. I suggest you not tell her who to talk to and who not to talk to... I know it seems rude... but when people tell me not talk to talk to so and so just because they have something against them... it makes me think that ... its a problem between THOSE two... and it shouldn't concern me. If she can regain your trust... by telling the truth, then I say all's well that ends well and ya'llz should give it another shot

I'm sorry about what happened to you... its terrible to top anything bad off with a breakup with a girl you really do care about. I think there is still a chance... just take her aside... explain to her what happened... since you said she really believed in you... she probably still does believe in you... so simply tell her the truth... it won't be easy to start all over again... but once you get going... it will get easier and easier Changing to her school JUST for her may be a little extreme.. especially if you two don't end up getting back together... because you'll see her around school.. possibly in your classes... and you don't want to be distracted... but if you truly think that school is the best one to attend to pursue your dreams... then I say go for it You'll get through this... I'm sure you will. Just take small steps at first... the rest will come naturally. Its never too late to start over. I wish you the best.

hey... well first of all... I'm not sure what you're getting after... the post was very interesting as you know a lot of knowledge concerning their past (as well as present?) love life and when and how their lives when down the "crapper." You do sound quite frustrated... I know its easy to get frustrated over this sort of thing.... but do you want to get back together with her? And if you do... do you think theres a chance? The only part her ex boyfriend (who shes possibly with) has to do with this is... if they're a couple... if they're not then theres a chance you two can get back together. But... if she keeps going back and forth between you and her ex bf... then shes probably not worth it... if she does that type of thing it looks like shes looking more for adventure and when the adventure of one relationship dies down, she goes to the other guy and so on... I know its hard to do... so much easier said than done...but don't get upset over the "what ifs"... as in.. what if she IS back with her bf? how will that affect you? Well... that would mean you can't get back with her for the time being. I'm unsure of why she would go back to her ex bf after 3 and a half years of dating you... yes its flattering to have someone go heads over heals for you but in my opinion... if they destroy their own life because they broke up with you... thats not very flattering... it sounds like a guilt trip. Anyway... when you ask her if shes happy... she may take it as... whether shes happy with her love life... not necessarily her entire life... obviously shes not happy with her entire life because she complains about not being able to find a job etc... It sounds like she still wants to be friends with you. Just be careful... it'll be easy to spot a pattern: her going back and forth between you and her ex... if she does that... then she doesn't know what she wants and i suggest you just ... stay away until she has things sorted out... she can't do that all of her life... unless people let her.

it will come naturally... when you two are alone (unless you really have the guts to ask her in front of people but it may be sweeter if you take her aside...) and maybe hm... well it depends on what kind of girl she is... maybe give her a rose and take her hand and tell her that you really care about her and you'd like to go out with her... there are so many possibilities... keep in mind what kind of girl she is and what kind of... approach to asking her out would awe her...

hey, this looks quite confusing... it looks like she probably does still love you... however the part where she acts like you two are together when you're alone but just friends to the public... sounds quite common... it happened to me... I didn't know what to think of it... I'm not sure why you two broke up, but it sounds like she's having a tough time with the breakup, too, and she feels she's happier when she's with you than without you....as for acting strangely in public... it looks like she doesn't want to admit that shes having trouble with the breakup. You may just want to talk to her... if you're offended by what she seems to be doing, simply tell her nicely... honestly she may not even notice what she's doing. And truly... it doesn't matter where you two are... both of you should always show the same respect towards each other. And remember... if you can't be bf and gf... being friends is better than nothing

no problem I just find it strange that he keeps on moving back and forth between your house and his ex's houses... it just doesn't make sense especially since you two are boy friend and girl friend... you may want to talk to him about it and tell him how you feel when he keeps on moving in and out of your house... even though you've stated that he is your best friend as well as your boyfriend... I'm sure he'd never want to hurt you... but he won't know hes hurting you unless you tell him.

it is strange that he doesn't have the heart to tell you why all of his things are no longer in the house... i suggest you confront him... I'm not sure what your relationship with this man is (bf/gf, married...) but it sounds like you really care about him, regardless of what others think he is. Relationships are based on trust and honesty: if you can't trust him to honestly say what is going on... You may have to bring it up... Although he hasn't said anything about strangely moving his stuff out... it is possible he may not break up with you... I know its easy to get upset over things that you think are true or will happen... I got upset when I thought one of my guy friends had a gf and another time when I thought one of my closest friend(who is a girl) was going to take him away from me... its a long story... if you'd like to read it ya can check my posts. But the thing is... I got over it... yes it took time and some tears but I did get over it... whatever happens... Its NOT the end of the world, trust me. Just stay calm and try to figure out why he's doing this.

Could he just be playing me for a fool? He is actually desparate for a gf and he's always mentioning how he wishes he had a gf....

A lot about being in a relationship is being able to be honest and trust each other... you need to remind him how much you love him and how he is the only one for you and you would never think of cheating on him. Ask him why he thinks you would or are cheating on him... then tell him that you would never do or even think of doing such a thing.

This has happened to me before... what I do is I stay away from that person... if she is always putting you and your friend on the spot and making you look stupid, and she KNOWS it upsets you then she will persist. Just turn it into a joke, or turn it around on her, or simply just start laughing and just talk to your friend. Don't tell her to stop... it will make her want to continue. If she loses interest in putting you and your friend on the spot... because you and your friend don't respond to her comments, then she'll stop on her own. If only people like her had better things to do...

it sounds like both of you like each other.... "wanting you" the may mean either in bed, in life, or both... maybe you can ask him about his love life... possibly in person... and if it seems like the right time...maybe you can tell him how you feel. be careful though, sometimes telling your friends that you've fallen in love with them can ruin a friendship so be very careful.

Hey I suppose I'm kind of new at flirting too... but here it goes: flirting is mostly touching the other person, getting them to notice you... and it may also be considered as "leading them on" which I think is flirting just a LITTLE too much... if there is a guy you like, whos lets say, in one of your classes, just find a time to go up to him, introduce yourself... get the hang of starting a conversation out of no where... but its better if its about something that's worth while... such as... if he likes sports... maybe you can talk about sports... maybe touch him on the shoulder or something... flirting can also be considered as always laughing and his jokes... even if they aren't all that funny...

either he didn't receive the message, has been busy the past few days, is too nervous to call, or is simply not interested. Give him a little while, maybe a week or two... if he was interested he'll return your call... or if you are like me and can get very impatient... you can try to get through to him maybe, every other day... cell phones usually record the missed calls and the number that called... so you may not want to call too much on his cell phone... because he'll know you're head over heals for him and ya might not want him to know that at first... i'm sure he'll call though and ya know... if he doesn't... then don't worry... its his loss

Your story is really cute! sorry... just had to say that... because it is! lol well... you have two girls on your hands... your girlfriend and your childhood "sweet heart"... you have to decide, and soon, who you really like... i know it IS possible to like two people at the same time, but sooner or later, even though I don't know these girls' personalities, I think they will get jealous of each other, over you, and may even break all contacts with you... we don't want that to happen... It sounds like you really like your childhood sweet heart and the part about falling in love with her again was not your plan may tell ya something... that maybe ya should give her a shot... possibly, her getting her "wonderful boyfriend" was a statement: saying she wanted you but this is a way to show you that she, too, can get a bf (well in your case you would get a gf of course) just evaluate the situation like someone else already said... it may take a while... but you can't stay confused. i hope i helped

Hey, I kinda have the same problem... well, sort of... anyway... if she says she wants a break from relationships, then I think you should let her get her break from relationships... if she had feelings for you before, she may realize that she wants to act on those feelings... so she'll come to you. Maybe you can give her a few months...2 maybe? Some girls take a long time to get over a break up... but after a while if nothing happens I think you might want to move on... I know that seems really rude... but there are other girls out there, too. It doesn't mean you have to really let go of your feelings for her completely, just look around... see who else there is, ya know? just be careful... sometimes confessinig those kind of things can ruin a friendship.... as for your spy... she may like you or may not want to see her friend get into another relationship because she may be insecure... you never know about these things...

hey... i'm still here! ... lolz anyway... thank you so much for replying... i really appreciate it! I don't know why i keep on pushing my feelings aside... probably because i'm afraid him and I won't be friends .... if... i don't know lol but its true that him and I have been through a lot together and I hope we will be friends for a very long time. ahh i have more info for this topic... I really should have planned out that one message instead of replying to my own message but here it goes... i can't remember a time that he has gotten mad at me which is strange because he can get mad... uh... kind of easily... my friend, who is a guy, said that when a guy puts his arms around a girls waist says a lot. i'm just trying to figure out what its saying! lol also, whenever we needed a partner in any three of our classes, he would always come over to me and say... HEY PARTNER! lol i know... kind of corny... but still... i thought it was cute. hes comfortable to talk to me about things he wouldn't tell anyone else... lol i found that out when we stayed up all night talking... ok i'm going to TRY and not reply to my post anymore... lol i really want to know what others think about this

hey everyone I'm new here and I have a "problem"... well theres this guy who I met at towards the beginning of the year... I was really shy at the beginning of the year so he was the one who started talking to me after him and I had finished running the mile... he came and sat next to me and we started talking about sports... he was pretty easy to talk to, I thought. The next time we had P.E. (we have block scheduling), I was sitting on my "role spot" in the gym (yea yea yea I know.. jeez... stupid stuff... anyway) he scared me by ... well its kinda weird sounding... but he went behind me and ran and jumped over my head... I started laughing and so did he... then, the next time we had p.e. i was wearing a jacket and he came behind me and pulled the hood over my head... it got dark really fast! lol well my friend in that class continually told me that he liked me... I didn't think so... I thought he just enjoy scaring me cause I can get "scared" or "surprised" whatever you wanna call it... very easily. Well, it turns out that we had 3 out of our 6 classes together, we started talking in class and eventually he asked me for my AIM s/n... so we exchanged s/ns... during lunch periods, when I would be talking to my friends, he would come up behind me and wrap his arms around my waist and lift me off the ground... each time he did that, I never expected it. I turned around after he did that, and saw a big smile on his face. I couldn't help but laugh... once I was just talking to three of my friends and he ran over, lifted me off the ground and put me down and said.. just wanted to do that... and he went back to talking to his guy friends... all of my friends and I started laughing hysterically. I told one of my friends everything that he would do and also that people began thinking that he liked me... I suppose she got jealous and started flirting with him... so whenever him and I would be talking, she would come and touch him in some way or another... but he always ignored her... he just kept on talking to me and whenever he got the chance he tickled me or lifted me off the ground. (when I realized what she was doing, I got really sad and depressed... I didn't know what I would do if her and him would go out... but they never did) During winter break we stayed up until 8am or so talking... wow... lol For the rest of the year, he kept doing what he did... scaring me... picking me up off the ground... any way he could come in contact with me... so many people assumed that him and I liked each other and that we should just admit it and go out. We never did. During the year we went to my friends house to work on a project, he was the only guy there... all three of us were being stupid and wrestled and such... we were all pretty good friends... but then, the last day we got together for the project, I was standing like in the middle of the room just talking to my friend, and Bill came up behind me and put his arms around my waist... holding me... I didn't know what to do... I started laughing cause he wouldn't let me go... and I was like... uh... ok? and hes said, "you know you like it... so why are you trying to get away?" Whenever he could, he would go behind me and put his arms around me... I don't know what my friend thought about it... her and I just exchanged glances like... "ok...?" One of the many times he held me, I asked him why he wouldn't embrace my friend instead of going and scaring me... he didn't have an answer... During the summer, I talked to him somewhat online... one of my other friends told me that Bill had finally gotten a gf... because he was so desparate for a gf I was surprised that he finally got one... I cried. I have pictures of him, and I couldn't stop crying. I thought I didn't like him. I don't know if I like him or not or maybe I'm trying to hide it... well... the weird thing is... Bill wasn't the one who had a girlfriend... it was some other person who had a simliar name to Bill's... I was shocked... and happy at the same time because that meant that my friend and I could invite him somewhere to hang out. Can rumors come true? Do you think he actually likes me? He likes to flirt with a lot of girls but its strange because throughout the ENTIRE year he was always scaring me and poking me and tickling me and always wanting to talk to me... I found that whenever I was in the same class with him and talking to another guy and laughing or really deep into a conversation he would either inturrupt the conversation telling me to stop flirting or I would look over at him and he would have a really sad look on his face. All of my friends say they think he likes me... one of my friends claims that its obvious because of the way he looks at me... she also thinks its cute cause Bill and I seem to be each others "protectors" I didn't think I liked him... but why do I get so upset over the thought that he like likes some other girl? I want him to be happy, even if its not with me... during the year I had other crushes... for a little while I knew for sure I liked him but that only lasted a month... I don't know what to do... what if he tries to hold me again? of course... I have no problem with it I just want to know what he's trying to tell me... if hes trying to even tell me anything. --- addition (edit by SwingFox) --- oh I just thought of other stuff... sorry there is just a lot of stuff... he seems to really care for me... he's really nice to me... especially when I'm sad... he'll confront me and say... aww whats wrong? he always mentions how he wants a girlfriend... i don't know why he always tells me... I have no idea if he tells everyone else too... but he trusts me and i trust him with secrets and such... I don't know what to do... haa haa look at that... I replied to my own message...