Lansing

If you actually want a shot at "dating" her then try to "date" her.. Try giving her a kiss if the chemistry is right, try some light physical contact (hand on her back when going through a door, touch her hair, something small like that)... I wouldn't get into a whole "speech"...

blah, unrelated to the initial story (I never called her back again, she knew I was interested, she could have called).... I started dating a new girl. She seemed totally into me but she just flaked on me too! She was suppose to call yesterday to get together but didn't. I called, left a message, didn't hear back from her. She was the one that suggested we get together yesterday. She is leaving tomorrow on a trip for 2 weeks. I guess I will see if I want to talk to her when she gets back.... just feel disappointed. I thought there was some chance of this one developing into something more than casual dating.

The thing is though, if you have expectations of where you want to things to go, you might be coming accross as too serious (like.. this "vibe"....)... You probably just need to re-evaluate the type of guy you are going out with. I would suggest spending the time/energy you are using for internet dating (both finding those dates/chatting with them/dating them) and getting involved in social groups (i.e. activities that you enjoy, or developing those activities). If I were you , I wouldn't even focus on "Dating" or finding a guy, focus on doing things that you enjoy. Some people fall into a trap thinking that a relationship will fix all their problems (not saying you do, but, from what you posted, it seems like that you have tied together being "alone" without a guy to being depressed,etc,etc)....I think it is true that one should feel comfortable being alone and spending time with oneself before they seek to get into relationships...

So, as a quick followup to my thread "do girls want a confirmation before a first date", I did call her the day of the date....She seemed to be happy that I called her... I kept it very brief... Anyway, the first date was great... Total chemistry,etc.etc.... Now, the thing is, sometimes I have a great first date, and the second one is only "so-so"... (or worse.. bad)...I think in those situations though, maybe the connection wasn't as strong as I thought....This girl seems to be very on the ball though.... So, on to the second date.... Any tips on not running out of things to say?? I like just joking around a lot and talking about everything and anything.... I am looking forward to seeing her again but, I guess part of me is just a bit worried that the second date won't live up to the "spark" of the first date

I think that you applogized is a big first step. Second, remember the feeling you feel right now, and try not to have any reason to appologize in the future! Keep control of your tempter and communicate in a rational way in the future....

Well.. I am SURE she will be there and that I don't have to remind her about it. You would understand if you read her e-mail to me.... Thing is, I sort of don't want to call her... I would rather just see her in person since I think I would be nervous for some lame reason to call her... I think if I saw her in person things would just go smoother... but, if I am feeling "casual" on Saturday afternoon I will call her..

If I set up a date today for the weekend, I am wondering if girls in general expect a guy to call later in the week to confirm things or touch base. Actually, in this case, the girl is the one that initiated contact (via e-mail) and suggested we get together. I just made the plans and she said she is good with them. I don't really see what I would say if I called her.. haha.. I just want to meet her and see how things go (I have met her in person before, but, haven't really talked to her much).... I am just wondering if girls in general expect the guy to call... and to "confirm" or whatever??

I saw on her online profile that she is atheist.. I am not assuming, I am passing it on fact of what she wrote (unless she lied)... anyway, that girl is pretty much out of the picture.....It has been a while now since we last chatted and she isn't making much effort to keep in touch and I am not "into" her enough to care to pursue her...

I had a similar situation. I had been at a girls place and things were proceeding from just "kissing" to more and after a while I said I should get going home. Well, she invited me to stay over. I said that it would be better if I left.. Well.. it happened three times and I think she got offended by it.... I mean, part of me really did want to spend the night.. but, at the same time, I didn't want things to proceed any further and I knew I would have been pretty tempted if I stayed so I decided to leave.... I wanted to get to know her better... Well, I wish I had explained things better at the time, since, I am pretty sure in retrospect she took it as a rejection. I should have told her that i was attracted to her but, I wanted to take things slowly.... In the end, things didn't work out because she got the sense I wasn't into her. After a while, she made her decision and it was too late to turn things back...

For me, I want to have a relationship that is balanced.... I don't want a relationship that is relying on "sex" to hold us together. I think it is easy to get addicted to the physical pleasure of sex and just stay with someone because you are enjoying that part....

He doesn't want to get together with the other girl it sounds like.. I think he is just saying that touching her hand has re-awakened feelings in him...

Please explain?? The only posts I can think of that you are referring to are ones where I have said it is better for people to wait until they are in a commited relationship to have sex. I think a lot of people on here are posting about having "one night stands" and then assuming that things will turn into a relationship without talking about their requirements. I don't really blame the guys in those situations as there was often nothing discussed before hand, just assumptions.... But, I would like to hear about your views on me based on my postings.. it is interesting to hear how I come accross..

ummm.. I am not sure where you views on people who are religious came from, but, I am personally pretty open and tolerant... I would still keep this girl as a friend regardless if I didn't want to date her... And no, I have never been to Jerusalem but I would like to go!

Yeah, I realize it probably isn't the age thing holding me back...... I have been thinking for a while now that I want to meet a girl that shares my religion/views... Well, I don't think she is religious at all (i.e. she doesn't believe in god at all)...sooo....... I think that is what is holding me back...

I met this girl recently and I found out shortly after that she is only 21.... We aren't really even "dating" but we did hang out over the weekend. I am interested in her in one way (I am attracted to her physically and she is definitely mature for her age)... but, at the same time, I always go into a relationship thinking "could she be the one that I marry" and I don't know if I could see myself long term with this girl. I guess I would like to get to know her more, but, if she was more my age, I would consider her as a "romantic" interest. I am debating whether I should escalate things to a romantic level... I think she digs me, but, she is too young to know how to give us the "flirt" vibes... There are a couple of other girls that I have been talking to and am interested in also.. so, it is kind of confusing.... haha... I guess that I am worried of is that I will escalate to "romantic" and then find out that I really don't want to "date" her and ruin a chance of a good friendship. On the other hand, I don't want to focus just on a friendship and then find out I really like her and be in her "friendzone".... I also have a bit of a "moral" quandry... because... , not to sound cocky, but, I guess I have accomplished a lot of things in life so, it is hard for her not to look up to me and be all amazed by me...like...

boy.. you are playing with fire...... I hope you find your answers though....

can't help you out on that question..... So, do you want to "date" this guy?? or get into a relationship with him? EDIT: Just noticed your posting times... less than 3 hours.. seems like the evening went by pretty fast!

From a guys point of view, this is a REALLY bad practice.. First, if you are not interested, don't give the guy your number! I think it is better that you tell the guy you are not interested (i.e. for you to do that all the time, not some of the time).... it may be blunt, but, it isbetter than letting the guy wonder why you are such a flake....(i.e. that is the opinion I have of girls that act like this)

I agree.,... You will NOT find fulfillment if you hook up with some girl. It isnt the path to filling the hole inside that you feel... You should work on meeting new people (guys and girls) and make some solid friendships. As for the girl that you called and she didn't call you back...if you didn't leave a message how is she suppose to know to call you back?

I can just picture the women on these forums getting pissed off with each "point".. Hopefully they will all make it down to your line about it being a "goof" (i.e. a joke I guess???).... It is true that a guy needs to build up his confidence in order to attract decent women. However, I think that someone should build themselves not just for the opposite sex but for the sake of enjoying life!

update on the main site... further info here: link removed link removed So-called Internet Virgin, Geoff, is pictured at his high school graduation with then-girlfriend Emily who has shot down his web tale of sexual woe. The Internet virgin is not so innocent, said the woman he claims was his fiancee. A man named Geoff launched a website at the beginning of the month alerting browsers that he needed 5 million hits on the site before the end of May so that he could have sex for the first time in his 25 years. "It's a lie," said Emily, who called the Toronto Sun after her sister showed her yesterday's edition. "I think it must all be a publicity stunt." Emily didn't want to get into details but confirmed the pair did have intercourse -- more than once. "This is all kind of embarrassing -- I'm really kind of frazzled after seeing it on the front page," she said. "But I saw it and it just isn't true." Emily and Geoff -- both their last names are being withheld at their request -- started dating in March 2001 when the pair were at Parkside High School in Dundas, she said. The couple eventually lived together for about five months before they broke up in January 2004. But she said they were never engaged and that she didn't cheat on him as Geoff claims. Geoff confirmed that Emily was the fiancee he is talking about, but said he has no idea why she would say his story is bogus. "I don't know why she'd say that," Geoff said. "I'm sticking to it." On his website, Geoff explains that he was 22 when he learned his fiancee was cheating on him, despite their promise to refrain from sex until their marriage. He was so devastated, he swore off dating for three years. Geoff said a bar bet led to the website that now bears his mug and the plea to help him break his sexual shutout. His story goes that a 21-year-old friend named Jen promised to help him lose his virginity if he could get 5 million hits on the site in 30 days. News media outlets in the United States have picked up the story, and blogs around the world are directing surfers to the site to help the would-be innocence claimant get a little experience. Emily, who says she is now happy and dating someone else, said she initiated the break-up because "we were just going in different directions." At the age of 19, she felt it was time to move on. The pair have had some contact since they broke up. In fact, Geoff has had her computer for about the last two months because he is fixing it for her, she said. "If you had asked me two days ago, I would have said he was a really nice guy," Emily said. But now she isn't so sure. "I think someone has put him up to this," she said. "He is very shy, but you can tell that from his pictures." link removed

Well.. how about you don't have sex with him and see how long he waits around... it might answer your question if he just wants to have sex with a virgin or not.... (or.. he just might be VERY persistent)

The newstory... TORONTO -- He claims to be a 25-year-old virgin from Toronto who needs five million hits on his website in 30 days to score with a platonic female friend. Tracked down in person yesterday, Geoff insists he's the real deal: A sweet, sexually inexperienced guy who made a barroom bet, pasted his mug on a website with the help of friends and is now at the centre of a major media storm even he finds a little frightening. The story -- and Geoff is sticking to it -- is that he was 22 when he learned his fiancee was cheating on him despite their promise to hold off on sex until their marriage. Devastated, he swore off dating for three years. But things changed during a recent night out at a bar. Geoff claims his friend Jen, 21, promised to help him lose his virginity if he could get five million hits on a website in 30 days, similar to a recent online stunt pulled by an American who sought two million hits in exchange for a threesome involving his girlfriend and another woman. Geoff's website, avirgins link removed, has clocked more than three million hits since it went up May 1. Since then, he has been propositioned by several men and women. He says all the big American networks have called; there's talk of a movie and book deals, while blogs around the world are urging visitors to click on his site to drive up traffic and ensure him a romp in the sack. Yet the soft-spoken web designer, who asked that his last name not be used, appears to be a reluctant media star. "I have a life, too. I can't spend all my time doing this," he said yesterday when tracked down at a small Etobicoke website and marketing firm, where he works. It's a tale juicy enough to make any TV producer drool, but it's hard not to be skeptical: Until yesterday, the friends were selling T-shirts from the site, which they claimed was necessary to pay for extra bandwidth. Late yesterday, the site began carrying a racy ad for adult personals. Meanwhile, Jen's identity could not be verified. Geoff said she's been a good sport and will live up to her end of the bet if the site gets five million hits. ------------- Don't click here unless you want to support his "cause"... I clicked just to find out what number he is up to (over 3,000,000).. he has advertising on his site.. I wonder how much he is making in ad revenue.. It might be a scam just for advertising revenue! EDIT: If you go there no, they admit to it being a scam... but, just read the article I posted later so you aren't supporting his ad views! link removed

grymoire: The reason why I didn't "date" her before was she was going back to her home country shortly and, before I really got to know her, I didn't think it was worth the hassle... In retrospect, maybe it wasn't worth the hassle

I agree you should wait a few days and see if he calls you. His family, etc are probably on his mind right now.... Try not to "figure out" if he likes you. Just enjoy it. I went out on dates with this one girl and I could tell she was insecure and trying to figure out if I liked her... It was a bit of a turn off actually...