LootieTootie

If my partner has a pattern of lying, I see that right away as not being honest. If you value honesty, this guy isn't it.

When he told you he was done, he was done. Have you thought about downsizing since he left? It looks like you both stuck around due to financial reasons. Any way, I love your fur baby account picture.

Ok, so, it's not even her house and she is upset at your mom for showing your house to your aunt. Wow the entitlement here. I have to commend you for drawing out some boundaries with her. However, it seems that she is not respecting your boundaries if the same fights keep happening. Relationship is a 2 way street and it sounds like when you guys get into fights, she fights dirty. Please do not think this will somehow change overnight... People who are abusive do not change overnight - most actually get worse the longer you are with them. It's good that she is going to counseling with you, and I am interested to know have you told your counselor about your fights? About her throwing a wine bottle *near* you ? Which one day, will probably be at you.

I hate to go off topic on this too, but yea, I talk to a lot of grown adults who still need help from their parents when it comes to paying bills, weddings, vacations and just in general. Any way, getting back to the topic, as long as the poster and the dad is thrill to be parents, I think thats a great sign so far for a happy fam. I see so many people nowadays who shouldn't be parents or don't want to be a parent. It's the kid that suffers!

Yes. Nobody cares because everyone got their lives to worry about. But yea, water cooler topic for days, weeks and months. After the baby is out, "What a cutie!!" You're fine having his child, and he's happy to be a dad at his age. Good news around.

I am sorry Ornate. Sounds like you were just being a good friend and being honest with her. I don't think you did anything wrong. It happens. I had a friend in college that I was helping her get out of an abusive relationship. I was the friend she would call and text when he beat her up black and blue and she would also begged me not to call the cops. So, I finally had enough one night because I could hear him in the background trying to break the door down and called the cops. Same night, she called me and screamed at me that I had ruined her life, and all her cop colleagues (yes she worked for the PD with black eyes!) will now look down on her. We never made up. I never reached out too because I was done being emotionally drained from her drama. Any way, what I learned is that... even if you're being a good friend just sticking up for a friend who has a terrible partner who treats them badly, they will still pick the terrible partner over a good friendship. So don't feel bad... In the end, your friend is the one who will still get treated badly and have no one to lean on because she chose to burn that bridge.

EW this guy is a loser

I think the problems have piled up and there's no coming back. Have you looked into affordable housing for students? Maybe just focus on your studies and not rely on him for your source of distraction, comfort, and shelter. This guy was probably your savior away from your abusive family but he's not your savior in life. Only you can help yourself.

Hi Rita, Does your employer prohibit workplace romance/dating? Also did you guys willingly had sex without protection? I'm sure if you both were doing the deed without protection, you both were aware that pregnancy could happen. Last question is you mentioned that the trip almost didnt happen. Why?

I don't know if you guys ever watched the Tyra Banks show when Tyra had her own talk show. Any way, she would have guests on her show, but always turned it around to talk about her own experience or some anecdote that sometimes had nothing to do with the subject on hand. She got a lot of criticism for doing that. Saying that, I don't think you did anything wrong Tiny. I think if you had kept messaging her about your dad's cancer ordeal, it would be different. But I do think that people grieve differently too and maybe some people are extra sensitive during mourning. I'm sorry about the death of your dad.

That's good to hear. I think when we go in that dream state sometimes we go in to another level of consciousness. I had it happened twice. The one time I had mentioned earlier, was on oxycontin, and the second time, I went out of town for a work-related conference. I was there for 1 night only and had to book a hotel. That night I had sleep paralysis with the same devilish creature. This time I didnt fight it and told myself not to be scared and go back to sleep (even tho I was asleep). It left me alone once I didnt fight it or was scared. It was almost like a cat jumping off the bed and saying "meh you're not fun" 😁

Can I ask is this your first relationship? First love? How old are you both?

Were you taking any cold medicine for your covid? It sounds like Cold medication because I have very lucid dreams, sexual dreams too, when I take NyQuil. I think harder medication gives me the worse lucid dreams. One time I had to take oxycontin post-surgery. I had just started listening to a paranormal podcast so since I was bedridden, I listened to it after taking oxycontin. It was about people's experiences with sleep paralysis and some people had incubus/succubus experiences - creepy stuff. Well, I must have fallen asleep because I had this real bad dream that a devilish creature was on top of me and I couldn't wake myself up. I finally fought it off and woke myself up in a ball of sweat but it freaked me out. When I woke up, the podcast was still on and it was only 20 minutes that had passed! I thought I had slept longer but I guess not. I didnt want to go sleep after that for awhile.

Same. I watched it's sequel recently and my allergies wasn't flaring as much but still good. Love Dennis Quaid. Marley and Me, Togo - both movies had me crying nonstop. When my husband and I were watching Togo, must have cried so hard and scared my older dog that he put his paw on my arm. That really opened the flood gates!

Taking care of older parents can be taxing because it is a full-time job and it costs a lot of money. I think you and your sister need to have a heart to heart. Let her know you want to iron some details and you're wanting to have a clearer idea of how this will work. I think maybe you also have some questions you like to know where her head is at - What if mom is too sick to travel to stay with you and they need a break? What if your health declines and they need a break? How would they react to it ? Again, these things are tough and so its best everyone involve are on the same page.

I don't think it really matters how socially awkward someone is or isn't when it comes to dating. If someone really is in to you, they want to hear more from you and know more of you. If this has only been 2 or 3 weeks and neither one of you find each other interesting to poke for more information, I don't see you both lasting except when you both just want a good romp.

When I was 27, I was working a part time job on the weekend. I was working there for 3 months already and was done with the cattiness of the office manager and administrative girl. So I called and put in my resignation. The office manager decided to keep my last month's timesheet on "hold" without notifying me. It was 2 weeks by then and didnt get an email or call. So I called and she or the administrative girl were both hanging up on me. So I go to the work place, and asked to see their boss. I forgot what his title was but he pretty much was like the CEO. He didnt have time for me, but the Office Manager said that she didnt have my timesheet even though I know I submitted one every month. I said "Ok, well let me go ahead and redo the timesheet while I'm here." I redo the timesheet and handed it to her and she said "You know we will have to verify by watching the tapes if you came in and when you left." I said "Please do. You would see I was here on time and left on time. 5 hours each for Saturday and 4 hours each for Sunday. As we have agreed to." I walked away hoping that this would work out now that they see how serious I am about my last month's pay check. A week goes by and I call the office not hearing from them AGAIN, and I get the usual hang up click on the other end ...AGAIN. So I called the state's Labor Union. Best thing I ever did. He not only educated me but he gave me some great advice. So I do some research on this company using google of all things, and find out who their parent company is. I also see that they were restructured a few times, and who actually managed them (another company), so I called them. "Excuse me, is this the headquarters for so and so businesses? I haven't been paid by [business name] and I called the state's labor union and they said I should call and ask if you were aware this was illegal not to pay your employees?" The lady said "That's strange. Whats your name?... We don't have your timesheet." I answered "So they still kept the timesheet after I went in last week and re-submitted it. So now you're 3 weeks late in paying me and you can get sued." She asks that she calls me back and check with business name. Took less than 5 minutes for a callback and confirmation that they have the emailed timesheet and they must have missed it. Riiigh... obviously I know they called the business and the business had to cough over the timesheet. I got wired my last month's pay on the same day. Finally... arigato suckers. I'm telling you my experience with a bad part time job because I can relate and I hope my experience empowers you to do what's right for your sanity and self-care. Even if you must fight them til the very end, you can. You just gotta be willing to and not be such a pushover wherever you go, whoever you meet. There's a lot of employers out there who don't care about their staff, and this weekend job you have, sounds like one of them. Not worth the pay, not worth the hassle.

Nobody has a crystal ball why he hasn't asked you out yet. But if your gut feeling says this man isn't that into you, then be brave to speak up: "Hey I know you're on vacation. But I really like to get to know someone in person and not over texting. Let's reconvene in person once you get back ;-)" Then start to steer that direction with little or no texting back. See if he actually wants to plan the next date/meet that isn't at his house. If he isn't engaged in that dialogue then at least you know.

I'm so sorry about your dog, Lost. You are so right about dogs. Especially if you get a puppy, they are chick magnets everywhere you go with the dog.

Is that $120 or $150 a month??? Read that and was just thinking how inflation got OLD too now.

Please call the police when it happens. You and your brother should not be in the care of your parents any more. I also think you would not get deported. Were you born in the US or another country?

Thing about friends is that its like dating ... its really hard to come by someone you just instantly click with. So, be ready that not every "first date" with a potentially good friend is going to hit it off. You will need to keep hanging out with them and really tap in to your positive Alex side that is sweet, upbeat, thoughtful and open-minded.

I've always thought 3 months mark was a good indicator if you wanted to continue a relationship or not. It's short but gave each other reasonable time to get to know each other. If you decided not to continue, it was easier to move on instead of not and thinking "well, I've already invested so much in to this person already..." Any way, I think it's fine. I know you kept saying No one is perfect and I am happy you found out that there are things that are dealbreakers for you. People, including me, always talk about how terrible dating is but dating really is a great self-discovery journey.

If last week to now he is refusing to hear your side and is still easily irritable, this isn't an ideal situation to subject you or your kids to. He needs to get reassessed soon and not be jumping from one psychiatrist to another just because he isn't hearing what he wants to hear or seeing a quick fix. He has to stick with one dr, try their prescribed treatment plan and be consistent and diligent about it before any progress shows.

Alex I am going to skim thru all the not so good stuff because I am so friggin happy that you are going to go hang out with NEW people! Bout time you find new friends and hang out with new friends. I'm hoping that you make some lasting friends that will be kind to you and elevate you.