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lostandhurt

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lostandhurt last won the day on January 6

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About lostandhurt

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  • Birthday 02/07/1964

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  1. Okay so he isn't your bf then. He is some guy that lives far away that you talk to. That isn't a relationship, that is a chat buddy even if it is romantic or sexual it is not real until you meet. You have been talking to this guy for a year and still haven't met. Doesn't that sound sketchy? How old are you and how old does he say he is? How far apart do you live from him?
  2. Think about all the great guys you could have met over the last 4 years. Jeez being alone would be better than this guy. You will meet someone way better trust me, heck how could you possibly do any worse than this guy??? Time to cut him loose once and for all. Lost
  3. Have you ever met this bf in person? How far apart do you live from each other? Lost
  4. If you feel alone in a 900 sq ft place that is pretty bad. I agree she is an addict. Look up the definition of addiction. Just because it isn't heroin doesn't mean she cannot be an addict. You clearly come second or third in her life. Certainly behind weed but it wouldn't matter if it was booze or video games. You are clearly unhappy (rightfully so) and she rolls her eyes at you and blames you. Start saving up in your own bank account to move out on your own or if you have family you can stay with until you get on your feet enough to get your own place. Once you are rea
  5. I agree totally with Reinventmyself. A whole paragraph of how miserable someone is in their marriage and the next sentence is: Then I ran into, or This woman at work, or An old gf and I became FB friends. It is always some version of that lead in to them explaining they are cheating on their spouse. They don't say cheating though do they? Affair partner is used by you in this case. To break this down you cheated on your wife of 21 years with an old gf from college, she wanted more but you didn't want to lose all your stuff/money in a divorce so you ended it and now you are heartbr
  6. You didn't mention your ages. You are projecting the importance of storing pictures to the health of the relationship. If he has tons of pics then it will show he really loves me and will not break up with me so to speak. Are you that insecure about the relationship that you feel you need this to feel better about the security between you two? Interesting enough your fear of losing him and the way you are reacting could very well cause what you fear most which him cutting you out of his life. Self fulfilling prophecy. Do you see what I mean? The more you fret about this and br
  7. Christmas day you admitted you still love your ex. That was 20 days ago, a blink of the eye really in terms of healing and moving on in a healthy way. You may have been having a bad day but you felt strongly enough to post about it. From reading your words your perspective of the amount of time to heal from being in love and in a relationship to being single, accepting it is over and then starting to heal so you can one day start dating again is extremely compressed. Dating after being broken up just 3 months from a serious relationship and just 20 days ago admitting you still love he
  8. Wow For your own self esteem you need to get away from this man. You broke up with him once before so the second time should be easier right? If you have any stuff at his house secretly take it home so there will be zero reason to ever speak to him after you break up with him. Plan it out a little and get support from family so you will not feel alone and isolated. Then do what you know you need to do. You are very young and have all kinds of options but first take some time to heal from all this, get your feet back under you and make a mental list of traits you simp
  9. I just read through some of your most recent threads and some older ones. It would seem you have been broken up for less than 3 months, your ex is on the same dating app as you and now you feel the urge to lock down a new gf as soon as possible. How am I doing so far? I don't think you are ready to date since just days ago you admitted you still love your ex. How about you slow way down on trying to find a new gf and work on yourself. You received a lot a of great advice over the years so why don't you start by re-reading some of your old threads. You can see where you were then
  10. The easy answer is: If someone that supposedly loves you is doing something that makes you feel bad and you have told them and then they turn it back on you like you are wrong to feel the way you do then don't be around that person. The short answer: Break up with him. His view of sex and intimacy is no where close to yours and from his attitude after you brought it up he is not going to change. This will only get worse so how long are you willing to tolerate this treatment? I am sorry but he has chosen porn over you. Time to end this. Just remember this isn't about y
  11. He is 29 and wants to retire in 3 years??? He spent 1K on you for xmas and keeps holding it over your head He is controlling He is insecure He is jealous I think you love the thought of a good life with him but that isn't what you are going to get. Do you think you are going to talk him into being not jealous? not controlling? Not so focused on money that he will actually put in the work a good relationship requires? He sounds shallow and only focused on his wants and what he wants is lots of money and gf that stays home waiting for his call. This will not
  12. There is not much anyone can do including you. You have told him how important this is to you and he simply is not interested in sex. Even if there is a medical reason he would need to admit that and seek help, not avoid the problem. Not sure why you agreed to marry a man that is so incompatible with you. There doesn't look like you have any options left. Marry him and be miserable until you finally divorce him or simply break off the engagement and end things with him. Who knows there may be a woman out there that isn't interested in sex too that is a perfect fit for him,
  13. Leaving the fetish issues aside I don't see how this relationship can last anyways. From how you described him you need to start figuring out how to end this and find your own way just you and the baby. Is his name on the birth certificate? I agree you need to talk to someone in your area that can offer services and help. Lost
  14. Sounds like he is dating his buddy not you. He isn't ready to be in a relationship. Please tell me you both are very young because if this guy is over 25 I will fall out of my chair!!! Time to break this off so you won't feel like you come last in his life. I am sure there are a ton of guys that would love to date you. Lost
  15. Ahh closure. We all want it but we keep looking for it in someone else instead of ourselves. You actually already had closure when you deleted his number with almost no feelings about it. He didn't do that you did!!! There is no reason you cannot take control back once again and end this for good. If he was that into you he would have met you in person by now plain and simple, covid or no covid. There is nothing to give another chance as I see it and I think you do too. This was an imagined relationship, not real so there really isn't anything lost except a fantasy. My
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