Bodybuilder_Jay

I really hope so!

Yeah I, of course, don't know for certain, but if I had to guess - she's probably somewhere in the 325 to 350 department? And I think she's gained about 100 of that over the years I've known her. So yeah, she's not small. And in the past, she's talked to me about self-esteem issues about how big she is. So yeah for her, I guess it's definitely a thing. And she's ALSO the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life. And I'm not just saying that just to blow smoke or earn credit points here - I mean like for real. Last week, when we went out, she wore this navy blue dress with this like white lacey small jacket thing over the top - not sure what it's called - a bolero jacket maybe? But sort of lacy and see through? Like holy ***, she took my breath away - she looked like a damn supermodel. Classy and gorgeous. She's just so beautiful I can't really describe it If Ashlee wants me to help her lose weight, then that's fine - I can totally make that happen. I know how to exercise correctly, and how to cook healthy stuff that tastes good. But she certainly doesn't need to do that for me - she's already in gorgeous territory. I really hope she knows that. I think she does? I think Ashlee just wants to feel better about herself. I'll help out if I can. Plus she looks super hot in her cute little exercising outfits, so it's not entirely without a payoff for me lol 🙂

I haven't had a chance to cook for her yet. I mean, over the years, she's eaten stuff that I've prepared - I am a chef, after all. Just sort of randomly happens once in a while if you hang around a person long enough. But I've never actually cooked for HER. That would require that we be at either one of our apartments, which I always thought would put more pressure on bedroom activities, so I've held off. We keep talking about me cooking us both dinner one night. Maybe I'll start with that? Stuff could happen or not, and it's hopefully no big deal either way? At the very least, I could make her a dinner she hopefully loves - I know all the stuff she likes! To eat, I mean I remember we met in high school when she was helping me out with math. Sparks kind of flew then a little bit - or at least I thought so, but I was already dating someone else at the time. Our timing just never really matched up till now. Now it's kind of the opposite situation - she's put on a lot of weight over the years, and she asked me to help her exercise more (motivate her, advise her on what to do). She told me she trusts me more than going to some gym where there's lots of judgey people, I guess. I was more than happy to help out. There's at least couple of classes I don't think I had a chance in hell of passing without her. Plus I wanted to spend time with her, to be honest. Now that we're for real dating, I find myself acting like an idiot kid again. It's thrown me off!

It's just insecurity is all, I guess. She's definitely the brains of the pair of us. So, if I'm not bringing the body, what good am I? I get that that's pretty stupid, and not really how relationships work (or even how humans work), but sometimes you let the little negative voice in the back of your mind get too loud, you know?

Yeah, of course you're right. I'm just being dumb, is all. I'll just let everything happen, and hopefully it's ok

A couple of times before, yeah. Honestly, I normally don't really obsess over it too much. It's just that...the stakes feel a lot higher now. I feel like she's the one, you know? And I just don't want to be a disappointment.

Not offensive, especially with the thread topic. No I don't take supplements other than vitamins, etc.

So this is like really embarrassing to admit, but I'm freaking out a little. I HATE typing this, but I don't trust myself on this and need advice So, about me. I'm a chef who works at a reasonably nice hotel restaurant (4 star place). I'm pretty good at that, I think. I'm a big guy - very physically fit, who participates in body building competitions sometimes. Had some decent success there, but not like I'm a professional. I'm single, in my early thirties. I've been dating this woman for about 3 months - her name is Ashlee. Now me and Ashlee have been friends since high school. Kind of lost touch when she went away to college, but reconnected shortly after she graduated. I've had a huge crush on her for like...as long as I can remember. I mean, don't get me wrong - I haven't been pining away for her this whole time. I've been in relationships, etc. But I've always had feelings for her. Never told her. We were just good friends, but recently decided to take things to the next step We're pretty different. She's SOOOO smart! Like she's a forensic accountant - super good with numbers! And investigating - she's basically amazing. Like she could be a baddass character on one of those police procedural shows lol. Plus she's pretty and funny and just the best. I'm in love. Like...a lot We haven't had sex yet - taking it slow. To be blunt, one of the reasons why things haven't progressed is because I sort of have a really small penis and I'm embarrassed about it. It's dumb I know - I'm an adult here, but listen...she's like a million times smarter than I am. She's not dating me for my mind (such as it is, LOL). Like, I think physical attraction is one of my main strengths here. And I totally know that she's not a perfect physical specimen either - she's very overweight for (only getting heavier over the years) and has confessed to being very self-conscious about it. Personally, I think she's gorgeous. Always have. Actually one of the reasons we got closer and ended up dating was because she asked me to help her with exercising, trying to lose weight. But anyways, I know that we both have our own body issues, but like...what am I going to do??? I just don't want her to be disappointed is all. I've had issues with sex in the past - I'm such a big person everywhere else (built up muscles, etc), that it's a bit jarring when the clothes come off, and it's revealed how small I really am. Prior to Ashlee, I wasn't really dating much. And on her end, I'm sure Ashlee has probably imagined how I look, right? How could she not be disappointed? So where I need advice is, like...should I talk about it to her prior to having sex? It just seems like a creepy and weird conversation to me? Or do I not tell her, and let things progress naturally? I'm just REALLY nervous about this, because more than any person I've dated in the past, this is a relationship that I don't want to screw up. I just wish I wasn't so psyched out on this