LootieTootie

Well maybe you are not expressing clearly to him and your mum and best friend why you are upset. You are upset because he is neglecting you but he's still doing him. We all have needs so it's understandable that you want him to take care of you sexually. Yet he isn't, so you're upset and your anger is misdirected at him for watching porn. I will approach this conversation again with clearly stating that you have sexual needs that aren't being met and as a full-blooded woman, you would like the sexual needs to be satisfied by the partner and not someone else or porn. This may open the dialogue how he can meet you halfway and maybe tap into IF he has a porn addiction. Porn addiction doesn't help a man perform better in bed. They put so much energy to porn that they don't have the energy for the real performance and the weight of the pressure.

Wow I am so sorry that you are putting up with this treatment. You need to break up with him but its probably best to start planning how to move back home or move out.

Definitely kids 🙂 My husband and I love animals so we are extra when it comes to being fur-parents. So this means we do extra, and even if my husband doesn't help with the household chores, he plays with the animals a lot and take them hiking and camping and I can't complain when I get the house all to myself!

I didnt read every reply to your thread, but my husband works a very laborious job and he works long hours. Its just me and him and we have 2 active dogs. I clean a lot, and he doesn't really help. But that doesn't bother me because my husband doesn't expect me to cook for him and he doesn't expect me to do his laundry. Saying that, sometimes I clean and cook for him and sometimes I don't. Do I feel resentful? No, because he actually does a lot for the household even if its not chore-related. Maybe start thinking if you both can just cook dinner and not cook 3 meals a day. Also maybe just keep laundry duties separated (everyone do their own laundry).

You can mount a tv in your bedroom wall. 2 days a week is not bad. At least you will be child-free and can focus. However I'm not sure if you can focus with the tv on while working remotely.

I think there are just some families like this. My mother in law got married to a guy whose family is like this and we thought she was okay with it because she said her relationship with her new husband was the best relationship. However, when she got sick with covid and had to stay at the ER and at be bedridden at home, none of his family ever asked how she was doing or checked in on her, even though his adult kids lived in the same house! (Her own kids lived out of town). It did make her really emotional and I believe she blew up on her husband and the adult kids. Not sure if they ever resolved anything from that- probably not. They're kind of a weird bunch. I honestly think you need to step back and re-assess if you can be okay with this type of dynamic. When you marry someone, you marry in to their family.

100% agree with whoever said this is toxic behavior. Punishing someone because they didnt agree to your suggestion on a whim is not healthy. I think you have a need to control and when it doesn't go your way, you seem to react in a way that is self-destructive. I recalled the 3rd date with him at the festival and you did the same thing. He was nice enough to stick around after that, and still nice enough to be around...

I would reach out and ask how he's doing. However, have low expectations or no expectations.

I'm sorry it didnt work out! I was so hopeful 😆 As others have said, at least you tried! & you found out that 'hey I still got some healing to do.' Some people just drag it on just because they can. I'm sure the guy appreciated you were honest with him this early on and knows that there's still a lady out there for him.

Hi Cynder, just had time to look at your thread and I am sorry you are going thru a breakup. I think it's been 2 days since you guys broke up and it appears that he keeps reaching out for some sort of closure? If thats the case, do you think this is helpful for you or good for you when you need to heal?

What did she do to make her go to jail?

Yes I concur with everyone here. Way too dependent on his mom and his family, and house shopping without even considering you, sounds like you were not prioritize at all. A lot of people fall for anyone who can say all the right things to their face, and I think that's what happened here. He said all the right things but his actions were clearly not prioritizing you or your relationship. You have been in no contact with him for a month. Stay the course and stay strong.

Yes dmt is a very strong psychedelic drug and it affects all your senses. I knew a guy who took it a few times. Believed it made him clairvoyant and he sweared because of it, it was always deja vu things that happened when he wasn't on it. Then he saw himself in the future really unhappy and depressed and he stopped because it scared him. He's a drug addict and most likely, like all addicts they become dependent on the drug. because its a powerful drug, the body get used to it as a fuel and once you stopped taking it, your body reacts violently. Hence, drug abuse. You really need to sit down and talk to him, and if he isn't willing to listen, then that's your call to get out. for your own sanity and well-being.

This happens a lot ...to a lot of young couple. You get together at a young age because you both like each other but you're also each other's support for everything- and when you're young, its nice to have that while you find yourself and navigate the real world. It does sound like she has outgrown the relationship and wants to try dating other men. That's okay but she has to tell you and if she doesn't tell you, you need to be smart enough to not let her drag you around. You both are still young so thats the upside. Can I also asked why are you unwell physically?

Oh this sounds so good! I am excited for you both and hope your date went just as well as your connection. It's really hard to connect with people and even harder to find someone attractive who also find you just as attractive, and when you have both, it's like the universe finally aligned the stars for you 🙂 Good luck and keep us posted!

Talk about skeleton in the closet... Look, your relationship is still new (4 months) and even if you're in love with her, the longer you stay, you're going to unearthed more skeletons. I think you know that too. This is a 36 year old woman who is most likely an attention seeker or/and sex addict with probably some underlined issues that played a huge part to why she's like this. You need to ask yourself if you want more of the same in the next 4 months, next year, next 5 years... This is her and you are not her 'savior' - you're just a bystander stumbling by, perplexed at her behavior and always questioning her. This isn't an ideal relationship for anyone so please, while its still early, just cut her off and give yourself the opportunity to heal and find a better person for you.

Well, this FWB is way too much strings attached. You're jealous and he's possessive and in addition, you both have really toxic views of the other gender. You both have so much baggage that you can't help but put all your insecurities in to this situationship. Maybe its time to back off from this guy "who doesn't have time to date because he's an electrician" and work on your issues so you don't get mixed up with another person who is just as insecure or more insecure than you.

Don't take him any where. Tell him he has to find his own ride because you didnt sign up to be his chauffeur for years on end. I know its hard to do but if you feel strongly about this and it's not getting through, then you need to be firm. If firm doesn't work, be ready to accept that there are incompatibilities that are dealbreakers.

Probably because you keep avoiding the question which makes us think you have posted here before but under a different alias. And calm your t!ts, no one has reported you. Again, your reality is definitely skewed.

Get tested now! Also, did you ask him where he could have gotten the STD? It seems like you both just got mad and didnt want to talk more about it and gave each other the cold shoulder. It's really important that when things are bad, as a couple, you talk about it and work thru it as a team. However, if you were mad at him and didnt want to speak to him, it could have turned him off. Then to come back and act normal, like nothing happened, it says a lot about the person's ability or lack of. Be mindful of this when you're in any relationship.

But you did. You wished him Happy Birthday and that wasn't important In one of your posts, you were the one who said you two were acquaintances. This is why you should not expect any response from someone if you call them an "acquaintance." Your reality is very different from most people, which is why I think you should talk to a school counselor.

You are an acquaintance Krispy! You're not a friend and not entitled to a "Thank you!" And also keep in mind that maybe theres a reason why you are an acquaintance. Maybe because he doesn't want to get any closer to you because you might be projecting lots of desperation vibes towards him.

Am I reaching when you are clearly obsessed with a man who doesn't care about you? Your reaction to an acquittance not responding to a HBD message from you is unsettling. Please talk to your school counselor about the university's clinic therapy sessions and costs.

I knew she sounded familiar... The obsession is unsettling

how much do you guys talk or see each other in between those dates that happen every 2 weeks?