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dannyz4

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  1. dannyz4
    It's a natural reaction for him to say he's leaving. He is really hurt and he wants to hurt you back. These are difficult situations... he may forgive you sometime in the future, but then he holds a "get out of jail free" card he can use if he ever had the opportunity to cheat. I think you need to give him the time and space he needs to deal with what has happened. It will be devastating for him to think you sought sex with another man. He will be dealing with his own feelings of self-doubt and questions as to why you felt the need to find it elsewhere. Ultimately the decision is his. All you can do is make sure he knows how sorry you are, how much you regret it, and how much you love him and want to make things right. Given time and space to deal with it he will make his decision on your future.
  2. dannyz4
    You're coming off a little desperate there... why do you *need* to be with someone? Is there something missing in your life you think a relationship will fill in? That's usually the start of being needy which drives people away. Sorry to sound harsh. This girl obviously likes you. She gave you her phone number. The question is, can you make it work since she lives in another town. On the other hand there is someone else closer to you who likes you and who you seem to now like. All I can really suggest is just relax a little. Why not have both of them on the go at the same time and see what develops with each of them. You may find one works out and the other doesn't. No need to kill your options so soon!
  3. dannyz4
    Yeah you've gotten yourself in a messy situation. Though I'm sure not intentionally she has sub-consciously used you to make her feel better about her failed marriage... you are the fantasy she needs to help her deal with it... and to reassure her that someone else in the world "needs" her and wants to be with her. I think she is stringing you along by keeping it on her terms... if she keeps saying it's getting too serious then I think you have the answer. She doesn't intend for it to turn into a serious relationship. You're an affair to help her cope, and when she finally has to start picking up the pieces of her life you'll probably be the last thing on her mind. Sorry bud.. life sucks sometimes don't it!
  4. dannyz4

    question

    dannyz4 replied to bsmlb6's topic in Dating Advice

    I've only once ever had a girl ask me out. I think guys much more enjoy a bit of chase... and girls know this... so don't expect it any time soon!
  5. dannyz4
    I wouldn't flirt with him... it's only going to confuse you more when he flirts back.
  6. dannyz4
    Why the attraction to married men? Is it more of a challenge? Do you consider the person he's married to? This guy is obviously in major denial and by saying he won't have intercourse seems to somehow justify his behaviour so far. I think you are setting yourself up to be really hurt. Sorry but I think you should stay away from married men. Us males think with our dicks, not our heads, and who's going to clean up the mess once things come to a head?
  7. dannyz4
    First question I think is, who broke up with who? That is going to be the big difference in understanding her behaviour.
  8. dannyz4
    Hmmm.... well, if he said he's not attracted to you and only wants to be friends then that's what you're gonna have to accept and respect. Guys will be guys, and we are always up for a bit of funny business, whether people get hurt or not is not always our first priority, so I wouldn't take it to mean more than just harmless flirting.
  9. dannyz4
    Yep, I would have to agree that men are slime. A lot of guys are giving the rest of us a bad name. But that's life... god gave us two heads, and only enough blood to run one at a time. Re teasing, it sucks, but you are just at the age where your friends can be complete bastards. Just try not to take it too seriously, because they are most likely dealing with their own insecurities by giving you a hard time. Unless they are being nasty or cruel to you I would just let it bounce off your back and give them a hard time back. Dont forget, you make for an easy target if you make it easy for them to give you a hard time, so just make sure you have as much fun with them. Otherwise, if they are really your friends I think you need to tell them, best one-on-one how it's making you feel. When people stop to think about how they are making others feel it can be quite sobering, whether you're 17 or any age.
  10. dannyz4
    All you can be right now is a friend... she is pregnant... I'm sure a relationship with you is the last thing she's thinking about. She is gonna go through hell with this baby, so I'm just saying, be careful, because I think you're setting yourself up to get hurt badly.
  11. dannyz4
    I think you did the right thing by telling her it was over... you are beating yourself up because you wish you hadn't said it, but the reality is that that is exactly what she wants. If she wanted to be with you she would have accepted your apology and things would have gotten back on track... but things were already messed up. It's an awful tragedy that her friend died, but that doesn't give her the right to ignore you and string you along not knowing where you stand. I know you are annoyed at her, but remember, when people are confused about their feelings it can be a real tug-of-war between wanting to be with someone and letting them go. You need to accept that the relationship is not going to happen the way you would've liked. Don't blame yourself or think you're no good inrelationships, because it's her that wasn't communicating. You did a great job, and one day you'll find someone who appreciates that effort rather than takes it for granted.
  12. dannyz4
    Woah hold on there... all that stuff is in the past... she went for another guy because you didn't ask her out. You can't change that. What matters is what's happening now. She is pregnant with another guy's kid. The first thing is, she needs to tell him she is pregnant with his child. He has a 100% right to know, and you should encourage her to tell him. I would be very careful about getting involved with this girl. It could really mess you up. If she chooses an abortion she's gonna be pretty messed up, and she's not likely to fall in love with you, which is what you're wanting. And if she has the baby things are going to get mighty complicated in her life. She's going to be dealing with raising a child, plus the father, and her parents. It's really the last thing you need. She needs to sort her situation out right now and you need to back up a bit. Just be available to her as a friend and confidant but I wouldn't go expecting a full-on relationship with her. Sorry if I sound harsh, but I think you need a reality check on exactly what's going on here.
  13. dannyz4
    Yeah I would recommend you just be the new person you say you are, and she will see that. Don't tell her you have changed, because that means nothing. Just be clear about why you want to see her. It sounds like she broke it off with you? You might sound a little bitter telling her how much of a better person you are since you've split with her.
  14. dannyz4
    Hey, you're not stupid, or ugly! Do you have someone you can talk to? These boards are good for getting advice but I think you need to talk to a friend or family member... do you know anyone that has suffered depression before that you can talk to? I know exactly what you're going through as I have felt that way before but you can find your way out of the dark and have a healthy head again. Maybe the medication isn't what you need... like I was saying in an earlier post... are you looking after yourself physically too? Like with exercise, lots of sleep and the right food? Exercise is the best medicine for the brain as it gets your endorphines flowing, which make you feel good, and is essential on the road to recovery. I think you need to seek help from someone close who you can count on to always be there for you. It's an awful feeling you have, I know, but there are always people willing to help.
  15. dannyz4
    Shinobie, that is a very strange comment you make that only ugly people suffer depression. The way you look doesn't predispose you to mental illness. It can affect anybody at any time.
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