greenie35

I don't spend a lot of money on clothes either. In fact, I often go to goodwill or thrift stores. I hate looking like everyone else and if you shop at the mall chances are you are going to end up looking like everyone else. Trendiness, in my opinoin, is annoying. Thrift stores are cool because you can find some sweet vintage t-shirts and jeans. I have a hard time finding jeans at thrift stores but every once in a while there's a gem in the rubble. If a guy dresses better than me, well...I dunno--I don't think I would like that very much. I generally go for t-shirt and jeans guys. And as far as whether girls look at a guys shoes first--I'm gonna say I don't. I look at his jeans. I like the faded worn out look and when he bends over and his boxers are kinda sticking out a little...I find that really sexy.

I just watched the movie "Closer" tonight. The emotion displayed in this movie was pretty realistic. If you've been cheated on you can probably relate to this movie. It's worth checking out. I watched Spanglish right after that...'nother great movie.

I like a man who knows who he is and isn't flashy. I really don't dig on trendiness, in fact I find it a turn off. A little off subject but I have never been a big fan of wearing clothing with the name brand tattooed accross the front of the shirt. I'm not into advertising for the brand and I don't get why anyone would. He doesn't have to try to be loud and say all the right things to impress and standout. Just has to walk tall and be himself.

Some people like thir men to dress up like babies...diapers and all...then change their diapers and spank them when they're naughty...Other people like child pornography.. point is... People are F'd up...Don't think too hard about it!

thanks for the replies... yeah I'm not making any bold moves anytime soon or anything...just doing my thing and going home fantasizing about him. No harm in that. I'm really just intrigued by him. I was told he's just kind of a quiet guy. Doesn't really talk much to anyone at work. I would like to talk to him, just find out what he's about ya know? I think that would help me get past his hotness and look at him more realistically...like a person instead of piece of eye candy. Ahh...but that would take all the fun out of it wouldn't it? Life is good...

she has pretty eyes, long light brown hair...medium height kind of average build I guess.. I don't knowo how you can tell if she is ugly on the insde by how she looks on the outside. She doesn't dress like a skank or anything...she looks pretty average.

I might add that although I do at times have low self esteem (as most women do) I still think I am pretty attractive. 5'10 big green eyes brownish blondish hair...I have kind of an athletic build and I tend to get down on myself about my stature. I'm what some would call a "brick house" bout 150 pounds roughly...which is healthy and all. Whatever, I'm just not a dainty girl by any means...he is actually a lot skinnier than me, but taller.

\\ heh...flirting techniques...that's funny. Yeah I know a thing or two about that, but usually i use them on guys that I think I have a chance with. Never thought I had a chance with this guy. I have been and for the most part and still am awfully bashful around him. I'm not a bf stealer...just don't have it in me. Flattery and "you me naked here now" looks ...(and that's what they are--this much I know) are two completely different displays.

yeah...same story...hot guy at work...made serious eye contact with me for months...yada yada yada...he has a gf...I'm too shy to talk with him...word of mouth has spread and he knows I'm into him...it's pretty much been confirmed. Now, he is being more open with me. Smiling more, something he didn't do before, just stared. Sat accross from me the other day on break (that was a first) didnt say much, just gave me this cute little grin. He held the door open for me the other day..he actually stopped and waited for me and held the door open. Lately I've noticed he's making an effort to walk past me when I'm stocking at work. He will see me and stop dead in his tracks change directions (kinda like he jsut remembered something) and walk in my direction and then make eyes and grin at me when he walks by. This lady that works in his department told me my friend told her I had a crush on him. She was annoyed with my unwillingness to initiate convo with him so she thought she'd get the ball rollin' being that she witnesses him checking me out. I was mad at her at first, but I'm kinda liking the way he has been acting. So I'm pretty sure this lady that works in his department mentioned it to him. Good news is I'm a lot less intimidated by him. I don't sweat anymore when he walks by me and I don't look away when he smiles at me. I don't want to interfere with his relationship and I don't even know for sure if he is implying that he wants to get closer to me or what...I mean who really knows. We still have yet to communicate verbally. I mean hello...hi...that's about it. Eyes ...lots of eyes. Man do the eyes say a lot...it's craaazy. He really is amazingly beautiful and I just can't fathom the idea of this guy being interested in me. I've seen his gf...she is really pretty, nice body...Don't get it. Yeah I've got some low self esteem. I know how to be sexy and intriguing and all that, but it's really all a front. Perhaps I just want attention to make me feel better about myself. Gosh, that's a sad realization. I'm working on it though. So my question is are these pretty clear signs that the guy is interested? Do you think that maybe he is thinkin' of leaving his ex or is he just liking the attention? I mean there's an obvious attraction. Should I do something? I'm feeling a bit more confident about the situation now. I try to think about how I would act if I was in love with someone and I knew a hot guy was into me. It would probably make me feel good, but I don't know if I would flirt like this...geeez...makes me scared to get involved with anyone. I would be pissed as hell if my bf (assuming I had one) was making eyes and smiling at a girl the way this guy looks at me.

Hey there...I've had a reoccurring fear for the past few years. I'm afriad I can't have kids. I mean I'm not looking to have any anytime soon. I had a ruptured appendix about four and a half years ago, and I've read that the scar tissue builds up and sometimes makes it hard for sperm to travel to the egg. I also had a leep procedure done about 3 years ago on abnormal cells on my cervix. I am almost positive that since I've had two surgeries in my abdominal region that the scar tissue must be impenetrable. My ex and I had unprotected sex for pretty much the entire time we were together (almost 3 years). We didn't want to get pregnant, but it seems like I should have considering we didn't use any birth control. I don't know, I probably shouldn't worry about it too much. Anyone know anything about this? I'm also wondering why the doctor never mentioned the possiblility of infertility. I have read so many articles claiming that these operations contribute to infertility, yet the doctors said nothing. Perhaps I was naive and should have asked myself. Ugh...

It's really hard to say...I personally tend to smile a lot at guys I like as friends. I usually tend to shy away from guys I am attracted to and not smile unless they smile at me first. I think if she is finding reasons to talk to you then she might be interested. Try initiating conversation with her or smiling at her and see her reaction. If she acts a little shy or looks away and then back at you, there might be something there.

As I have posted a dozen or so times already... I moved away with my Now ex boyfriend to a new town to attend school. After we broke up I was essentially completely alone. I have no friends, I go to school I work...that's about it. Well, recently I went out after work with a lady I work with. There I met up with a guy I had talked to before. We ended up hooking up that night, and I really enjoyed his company. He was extremely sweet...sweeter than you'd expect from a one night stand. Well, to be honest I didn't forsee us seeing each other again, but I couldn't stop thinking about how sweet he was and how good it felt to be in someone's arms. I moved into a new place this weekend and my parents drove many miles to come and help me. It was an extremely stressful weekend. I am sore everywhere from carrying all that junk up two flights of stairs, not to mention I have a ton of school work piling up as we are nearing finals. I also have to manage work on top of getting organized in my new place and finding time for studying. My parents hounded me about all the loose ends that need to be tied up with moving. All of this stuff is kinda jammed into my head. I know what I have to do it's just a matter of managing it all. I ended up having a blow up fight with my parents last night and I feel horrible about it. They really have helped me out a lot but some of the things they said were hurtful and they lacked understanding of all the responsibilities that I'm trying to take on at once. They left this morning and I went to class..my eyes swollen from crying all night. I feel miserable...no motivation to do all that I need to do. To make matters worse my ex and I are not communcating on a positive level. I would like for us to just be cool with each other. I decided to call my "hook up" from the other night. I thought it would be nice for us to get together and just chill out. I mean he sounded interested in seeing me again..I figured why not. He was kinda weird on the phone. I didn't really know what to say I didn't want to come off too eager. I gave him my new number...who knows? We didnt make plans to see each other or anything. I just feel really crappy about that too... All in all I feel just a whole heap of worthlessness right now...I have no energy. I look in the mirror and I see an old lady. I feel so old and washed up and lonely. I hope it gets better...

I went from 210 lbs to 150lbs. I worked at a greenhouse one summer and the pounds melted away with all the hard work I did. I gained some back in the winter and then when I went back to the greenhouse in the spring and lost all of that and more. Evenutally I got sick of my weight going up and down. It was more depressing than just being overweight. I decided to join the YMCA and count calories. That was my saving grace. At first I was a little nervous about going to the gym because I was self-conscious about my body, but eventualy I came to realize everyone was there for the same reason...too look and feel better. I would see people of all shapes and sizes in there and I didn't feel as self conscious anymore. What you need to do for motivation is channel all that negative feedback into fueling your workouts. They say you can't...well guess what it is completely possible. I printed out a picture of the body type (realistic) that I wanted to achieve and I looked at it...repeating to myself that nothing tastes as good as being thin feels...imagine how good its gonna feel to go shopping for new clothes and having to buy a smaller size. Imagine having more energy, wouldnt it be great to prove to those people who said you couldnt do it wrong. AS for what you should eat...you should be able to eat the foods you like just not as much of them. If you want to keep the weight off you have to change the way you think about food. I used to eat an entire small pizza by myself and go to bed. Now I restrict myself to 2 pieces. That's plenty. Eat until you don't feel that hunger in your stomach anymore. I bought only healthy foods for meals. I ate a lot of vegetable stif frys and brown rice. Fish fish fish...protein is good helps keep your muscle while you're losing fat. Tuna fish and crackers is a good lunch...don't forget fresh fruit for snack and as a side to your meals. Always eat breakfast 1 cup of any kind of cereal (opt for the high fiber low sugar variety if you can) is usually okay w/skim or 1% milk....keep your meals under 500 calories and your snacks under 300. I also found that eating by the clock kept me from eating too much too often. If I started to crave something I would just tell myself ..ok I get to eat in anotehr hour, I'll take a walk and then when I get done it will be time for my lunch. I wuold literally eat every 2 hours and still managed to lose weight. Keep a food journal and everything you stick in your mouth write down. Read the labels on foods. Yes, eat what you want, but eat some things that are healthy and develop a taste for foods that arent processed and full of salt, sugar, and fat. It's all part of developing a healthy habit. There are LOADS of articles on the internet that can help you achieve your goals. I recommend link removed to help you keep track of what you are eating and also how many calories you are burning. IVillage also offers a lot of useful information for women trying to lose weight. Once you learn what it takes to lose weight you'll realize that you don't need to spend money on weight watchers or fancy gyms or exercise equipment to lose the weight. There's alot of things about yourself you CAN"T change, but you have it in you to change how much you weigh. Don't think it's goign to come off over night...try to lose between 1/2 and 2 pounds a week, don't overdo it. Trust me if you increase your exercise and modify your diet you are going to see results right a way, and that will only motivate you to keep going. Feel free to PM me anytime I would love to hear about your success.

If you offer a "taker" takes... Once the offer has been made the "taker" now owns the offer ---manipulating the offer to fit his needs and wants... The "taker" doesnt feel the need to show he appreciated the offer, because now he is in control of the offer and has already made plans for the offer... the "taker" not only takes the offer, but takes the offerers energy which he uses at his own will. The taker often will give no credit to the offerer...he will look like the good guy...the thoughful guy...the one in control... Meanwhile the offerer is left deflated and empty...And the taker is better off and mocks the offerer for offering in the first place.. Yeah I know all about that...Sad thing is that w/out people like us where would he be?? Don't give to a "taker"...share with a giver. That probably sounds pretty lame huh? That's how I refer to my ex- a taker...I was always giving thoughtful and considerate and he was only intersted in what served his best interests w/out regard to the sacrafices I made. No one should do things beacuse they expect something in return, but appreciation and consideration are worthwile bonuses of offering up kindness.

whoaahhh...no...perhaps I was unclear. I didnt talk to the guy. I'm not going to as long as he has a gf. I got a good look at her today. She looks a lot like me in the face...it's almost uncanny...whatever. I was talking about my ex taking my energy and all that business...thanks though.

I'm so tired of this crap. Day in and day out nothing new nothing exciting nothing moves me..no passion...no friends..nothing to do but sit here and read posts, surf the web, listen to music, and study. I work in a factory with those blinding flourescent lights and an unbelievably hot guy who plays my strings day in and day out and then hops in the car with his girlfriend who picks him up and they go home together. Whatever. I'm seriously slacking with school. I was honors last semester, this semester I'll be lucky if I get a 3.0. I moved here 8 months ago and my boyfriend and I broke up a little over a month ago. I don't miss him. I just miss having a friggin life. Something to look forward too, something to do. I've been going to the gym which has boosted my self confidence to some degree, but lately I've been plagued with insomnia which is seriously effecting my studies. I can't fall to sleep at a rational hour. I try, but I toss and turn. My cat pees in every corner of the house so the lingering scent of cat urine fills the air in this lonely brokedown palace. I can't afford to take her to the vet. They are his cats, but he said I could have them. Just another responsibility he didn't want to take on, right now. I gave him my whole world and he took it along with all my energy and never bothered to return any of it. So I'm completely empty...this job this routine this life. I keep waiting for something to happen....for things to change..I try to make things happen and I still end up here every night behind this friggin computer screen. No messages on my answering machine, Sometimes I chat w/friends from back home online, or get an uplifting e-mail, but that's about it. Just venting...I don't know what I'm doing here...I pray to God that he will show me the truth in all of this...Why is my life this way right now?? When is it going to get better?? I know no one has the answers but God and maybe even me deep down... I just needed to vent.

THat's good to know.

Yeah, that's great advice...that's exactly what I do. I act like I don't care, and he comes at me again with those eyes. At this point I'm starting to feel offended. I'm good enough to look at but not talk to. I mean it's been months and I know nothing about him except what I hear from other people.

Apollo has a point about the percent body fat. A while back when I was really disciplined in my workouts I actually weighed 10 pounds more than I do now but I was so much leaner. My clothes fit much better back then. I remember thinking why isn't the scale going down? As soon as I cut back on my workouts I noticed my weight drop but then eventually it went back up again when I abandoned my workouts and I started to gain a little fat. So don't concentrate too much on the scale. I love tuna and crackers...I get my protein and my carbs...Carbs are good, just not refined sugar. Raisins are great for energy...trail mix w/out m&m's are good too.

Hey hun~ I've been through what your going through. I also know how it feels to tell your friends about how you feel about yourself, only to be heckled because they think you are being silly, becasue you're not fat. I'm 5'9 and 150 which is about where i should be for my height, but I'm big boned...like a brick house. I gain muscle easily when I work out and it just makes me feel big...I am finally comfortable with my body after about 4 years of being obsessive compulsive about my weight. I also had a mild case of bullimia that made me feel worthless on top of feeling fat all the time. I still worry sometimes, but probably as much as any other woman. Exercise is really helpful in helping relieve some of that anxiety and making you feel good about yourself. I don't think you need to worry about losing weight. Just eat healthy and keep on runnin if you like. I would focus on doing sit ups push ups and other toning exercises you can do at home. Buy a set of dumbells or try pilates. I do sit ups and push ups and leg lifts (for the rear end) n'stuff like that at home and it has really toned me up. I also work out at the gym 3 to 4 times a week...I am not focusing on losing weight just on feeling good about myself and being healthy. I have been pretty disciplined for 3 weeks now and have lost 4 pounds, which is good I guess since I gained a little over the winter. I used to freak out afater I ate a slice of pizza...it would keep me up at night. I avoided lots of foods I loved which I think made me kind of bitter...now I enjoy all the foods I like in moderation...life is too short. As long as you have healthy habits...like regular exercise and control over your food portions there is nothing to worry about...it takes a lot of calories to gain a pound of fat and it's not going to show up overnight. Remember this...it is far better to be beautiful on the inside then the outside. In retrospect when I think about the way I was when I obsessed about my weight, always thingking about it talking about it..it was like I was so empty and ugly on the inside...Your beauty on the inside shows on the outside. Take care of yourself...love yourself...if you want to talk about your fears or concerns about your weight or anything else feel free to PM me.

I know this isn't the poetry thread but it's relative to the last post: a subtle wonder...an incomplete gaze broken by fragments of limelight... in the midst of tiny seconds...lust mediates

Update..for anyone who cares... I went into work yesterday all confident ready to talk to him if the oppurtunity presented itself. HE was the first person I encountered when I walked in. In passing I looked up with a smile and said hi. Normally I kinda look at him for a second and then look down. HE said hi in a quiet sorta voice with a bit of a look of surprise on his face...nothing too spectacular. Whatever. So later I needed some help with my machine and saw this as my oppurtunity to talk to him. After about 5 minutes of deep breathing I made my way over to him to ask for his help. Well two other people were in the room he was in. I didn't expect that. So instead of directing it to him...I just said I needed a hand with something and the other two peple got up to help me. So that sucks...timing was bad. If he had been the only one in the room I'm suer he would have helped me out. I don't get this guy man...for two weeks straight he'll be giving me some seriously sexy looks then he'll chil out out for a week...and I just give up on it...then he'll throw me a look again...and I tailspin ...it sucks...he's a tease. At first I couldnt believe the looks he was giving me...I am 25 years old I know a sexy come hither look when I see one. Only thing I can think of is...my bashfulness is sending him mixed signals...and he's not sure if he's making me uncomfortable or getting me hot. Well If I had the courage I would throw him up against the wall and...well...ya know... so there!

I don't think it's fair of her to expect you to wait for her, especially if she is seeing other people. There is a chance that after both of you have separated and have dated around a little bit you might find that nothing compares to what you had, but the chances of that happening are kinda slim, unfortunately. I would just tell her your not going to wait for her and if your meant to be together it will happen eventually. I suggest keeping a distance for a little while so as not to create any frustrations or anxiety about what might happen with the relationship.

4. I've been asked out maybe 20-30 times I've dated about 4 guys with prospects